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Jellyfish May 2015
Take care of me,
Be there for me.
Never discourage me,
Love me unconditionally.
You're supposed to be my mother.
But you treat me like I'm nothing.
I'm sick of your constant disrespect,
The loss of love in your eyes that makes me want to cry,
It's itching inside of the back of my mind.
And someday I'll say goodbye to you,
You won't want me to,
But you can't make me stay.
You're not my mom.
But until then,
I'll be walking in the rain.
Jellyfish May 2017
After rereading what you said to me,
now for the seventh time...
I'm starting to wonder if I am like her.
She dumps all her problems on a forum
while I dump mine here.
It's true I once was sad enough to hurt
but I showed no one.
You were there during this time
do you not remember?
How dark I became...
You hold yourself high on a pedestal
and like to think you made me who I am today.
While you did take part in the little things
you did not make me.
All you've made me is negative energy,
little smiles in between didn't help anything, not really.
Friends don't do these things,
not to each other.
I should have learned sooner.
Though I often wonder
when it all went under, the waves.
The waves that swallowed our loyalty.
Why did things have to get so difficult?
Leaving me always feeling so questionable, towards you.
You say I can trust you,
and that one slip up means nothing.
But I remember the last "slip up"
and the one before that, and the one before that.
You call me hypocritical,
for doing something in my past
that is completely unrelatable.
IT WAS NOT YOUR STORY TO TELL.
To anyone. Ever.
I hope you know, I would never
tell someone of your past.
Not the painful things that hurt you,
not the times you felt tearful.
*Why do you not care?*
Jellyfish Nov 2015
You ask me why I'm crying and if
something is wrong- when I don't
respond you remind me to do the
dishes and clean off the counters-
don't forget to sweep the floor, "yes
every inch matters," I mumble that
I yawned and zoned out before I
could listen and you roll your eyes
as you walk away- unaffected
but you're the cause of all of this
tension don't act like you can't tell.
I think I must belong in Hell
knowing all of the thoughts I allow
to slip in and out of my mind..

I'm so ready to say goodbye..
Jellyfish Jan 2016
All of a sudden...
I'm really tired,
I want to go to sleep
but thoughts of you
    haunt me
they keep me awake.
Jellyfish Dec 2016
Everyone is waiting for someone to save them, but sometimes you have to be your own heroine.
Jellyfish Mar 2016
I want to feel your warm words in person,
I want to feel them touch my heart while
I'm standing beside you, the way that they
do when we're miles from miles apart.

Even though we're not close in distance,
you're holding my heart in your hand even now.
Jellyfish Dec 2014
The good times and the bad,
Are both located in my past.
I've watched you cry,
I've heard you laugh.

That doesn't mean,
I always have to come back.
You've ripped my heart out,
In the worst ways possible.

You think you're the best,
But that's just not plausible.
You use to be my best friend,
It turns out that was implausible.

I've spent hours crying over you,
Denying that I ever felt anything.
But the truth is that I admired you.
I swear that I would've died for you.

But that was thirty-four hours ago,
I've cried my eyes out now though,
So goodbye my new nemesis,
Thanks for giving me a new therapist.
Jellyfish Jun 2015
I'm scared of bugs and, also hugs.
I enjoy writing, it keeps me smiling.
I like the rain, people think I'm insane.
But you seem to be different.
You remind me of being an infant.
Everything is exciting and new.
It's amazing, how you help me pull through.
I go off topic quite often.
The things I'll ramble on about..
I hope they won't make you check-out.
I wasn't sure how to title this, I just sort of spilt it out..
Jellyfish Feb 2016
I checked the mailbox today
and something from you came.

After running inside, excited to read your words,
I felt like my heart was ready to jump out of my shirt.

**I've missed you so much.
Z
Jellyfish Oct 2023
Z
I just want to crawl into my bed and sleep.
I don't want to hear the alarms beep.
I want to lay with my eyes shut
only to open them in a dream.

It doesn't have to be romantic or anything
Just something unrelated to life
I think I'm exhausted, let's not get into the why.
I just want to sleep.
Z
Jellyfish Nov 2023
Z
With you I was my true self,
Would always chase you around
Never wanted to fall down
But I'd follow you down

The space between you and me
Was always blurry only for me
It seems you never really knew
Just how close I was to you

It was toxic, it was bad
I didn't know it and now I'm sad
Every time I want to talk,
I stop myself and go for a walk

Every thought inside my mind
was yours to hear, I'd never hide
True friends shared everything
Was the message I received

But now everything is twisted
I don't know what was real
And was was scripted
My memories betray the realities
I'll always want the best of things for you and be greatful for the comfort you gave me during the worst parts of my life.
Zip
Jellyfish Oct 2017
Zip
I wish there were a system in my mind
that had filing cabinets and computers  holding all of my memories inside so I could just zip you away, but it doesn’t work that way.
I ******* miss you, and I hate it.

— The End —