A fold here,
another there.
I straighten it's wings
to make sure they fly as far as they can.

I swing my arm back,
and let go.

I watch as the wind carries my feelings away.

I hope that the wind carries my heart to you.

lines,
the curves of your neck, your eyelashes that flutter.
color,
the brown in your eyes, the barely there pink of your chapped lips.
texture,
the bumps on your cheeks, the smoothness of your hands.
space,
the width of your shoulders, the space between your eyebrows.
shape,
the way your shadow looks as the spotlight's on you.


van gogh, da vinci, munch, and michelangelo,
they'd all be ashamed,
for they could never make art in the form of you.

the idea that waiting
can bring you things you know
and never knew you needed
makes me realize
that there is hope in waiting.

i guess
that's why
we live for so long
and so short a time:
because we're waiting
and have waited
for all the best things
the world can conjure.

there is this someone
who faced the world
as if she was the daughter of ares.

she is as strong as her name.

she fights,
and falls,
and stands back up again.

through this endless cycle,
i see glimpses
of hopelessness and loss.

and i wish
that as she grows into a better warrior,
she realizes that she is not alone in this war,
for there are thousands of people
waiting and praying
for her to reach her victory.

it's at times like these
that i'm completely convinced
that you're my answer

maybe it had been written in the stars
that there would once be a girl
who loved a boy
who was slowly growing into
a constellation.

the girl waits and waits and waits
for a sign that this love she has nurtured
would soon ripen with age
and find its way
before the boy turns into a blinding star.

I am cordially writing this to you in hopes that my wishes may be given the chance to come true. I only have one request, and I'm sure it wouldn't take much of your time.

Please give me the chance to see him
again. I don't have plans to hurt him, nor do I have plans to take him from the hands of his family and friends.

I simply want to be able to tell him, even if he doesn't hear, about the stories I've wrote in his name.

I need him to know about the way I see him to be, so that I am aware if I'm loving the dream or the real him.

I want to be able to love him in his terms of what is right, the way he wants to be loved.

Though I know the chances of redamancy is slim, at least he knows that I love at least a fragment of him.

Thank you for taking the time to read my letter, and I hope that, if you choose to accept my request, I am able to show my gratitude to you in a more concrete way. Thank you, and I hope to get my answer soon.

Ideas
that I have yet to form
are already at the tip of my tongue.

So, so close
am I to finding out what my next imaginary tale will be.

There it is,
I see it.

I'm reaching out,
the tips of my shaky fingers graze the warm glass.

I stretch,
and stretch,
and stretch.

I fall,
it falls and shatters, too.

So, so close
was I to finally knowing what my next dream would be.

the sun is setting.
i point my gaze to the sky
and wait for the moon.

as the moon rises,
the words in my throat do, too.
i hope you love me.

you've gifted me
a galaxy
i was never able to see.

you gave me a family
i can call my home.

like how a prism
shines in every angle
struck by light,
you give me
all the colors of the rainbow.

i have found a family
miles and oceans away,
a family i know
that will make me do nothing
but stay.

people don't settle for the physical.
they want your heart,
your soul,
your energy,
your time.

people don't settle for what's underneath your skin.
they want your words,
your touch,
your eyes on them only.

people don't settle for what's real.
they want angels,
gods,
super humans.
the ones who don't have limits.
the ones you can never fathom.

it's hard for you, i know it is,
but the only thing i can say is that
i love you, and i will tomorrow, too.

even if i forget your name, your face,
when we first met, when we first kissed,
i love you, and i will tomorrow, too.

i hope that, even after the ten thousandth song,
you'd still have the courage, the desire to say
"i love you, and i will tomorrow, too."

i want to wave a hand,
but i can't.
i want to say hello,
but my throat stays tight.
it's hard for me
to do something i really want to.

i've been living my tomorrows
all my life
that i forget
that today still has its hours.

today,
i passed by a stranger.

she looked worried,
eyebrows bunched together forming little lines in between.

today,
i passed by the same stranger.

she look tired,
skin pale and lips peeling.

today,
i passed by the stranger once again.

she looked happy,
eyes as bright as the sun and teeth baring its refreshing white.

today,
i realized time does wonders for everyone.

the gray, dull me a few days ago was replaced by the shocking yellow i am and will forever be.

i was once told that
my poems all contained
messages of hope and fate.

i realized that
my love for you is as hopeful
as it really is.

i realized that
my love for you is a matter of fate
because i truly believe that
loving someone like this does not
happen as a coincidence.

maybe im being too hopeful,
maybe i rely too much on fate.

but if it is these two that can
bring me closer to loving you
more than anything in this world,
then so be it.

i'll be waiting with these two
etched on the back of my mind
along with your smile that brings
promises of a chance.

the world may not have given me the chance
to love you as you walk by my side,
but the world did give me the privilege
to love you so deeply.

maybe that's why we can't be together.
because the world knows that when my eyes,
that have always been searching for yours,
meets your gaze,
my world would be different.
for my world would become you.

tell me,
does it look like i'm already in love with you?

can you tell
that i've replaced all the stars in the sky
with every single piece of your galaxy?

the night is not that young
but if given the chance to be with you
then this night would turn into eternity.

i don't need you
to tell me
you love me, too.

i just need you
to know
that someone,
in this case, i,
love you so much more
than you ever
could believe was possible.

in the situation i am in,
i know people will tell me
that this is wrong and stupid.

but i don't believe them.

they don't know of the stories
i've written for you.
they don't know of the love
i continue to speak out for you.

and i will continue to speak,
and scream,
and whisper.
because you will never know,
maybe one day,
you'll actually hear me.

we run and run
through the spotlights
under the street lamps
and the trials of what is yet to come.

you and i have gone a long way:
you were there when the girl who
first stole my heart
had shared a milkshake on
red leather seats,
and when the same girl left
without me
after paying her bill.

the night is young,
our neighbors are nowhere but in the land
that their heads paint as they sleep;
you and i become artists of the sidewalks and
the rough concrete.

we leave our mark.

"long live the thieves of the street."

i find myself
daydreaming about what my world would look like
if you were here with me.

i would've braved that rollercoater
at last summer's fair
because i knew i had the handle bars
and you
to hold onto.

i would've auditioned for that role
in the school play
because i knew that you'd be there
to cheer me on
even if my voice cracks.

i would've done so many things
knowing i'd have you
to be there while i face life.

take my heart in pieces
and wave them around
for the world to see
that i have a heart
completely stolen from me.

they say taking is always easier.
i now know that the saying holds more truth
than i expected it to be.

giving means
spending your time.

giving means
sharing a small part of yourself,
may it be a small cell or even your spirit.

giving means
entrusting a person
to hold something
that could be of importance to you or to others.

giving means
saying goodbye to something
that was once in the warmth of your own hands.

through the act of giving,
we are letting others obtain the freedom of having something
that could've been yours, or has already been yours.

it takes a lot to be able to even think of giving,
because you don't know what you could've had
yet chose to part from.

i hope we all give this christmas,
and that we have the courage to face whatever happens
after giving away a piece of our time, hearts, and spirits.

i'm selfish,
for wanting the eyes of everyone i met
or have yet to meet
to be only on me.

i'm selfish,
i don't want others to rise
because i know it will mark my fall.

i'm selfish,
i know.

but aren't we all?

Sometimes
I think about just telling him
that he holds my whole world in the palm of his hands.

But I'm scared,
terrified,
because what if
in the end,
I'll only be left to bleed?

What if the world he holds without knowing
just crumbles into ruins?

But I tell myself,
would you try or risk never knowing?

Will you risk never knowing
if he believes that I have his heart
in a glass case kept hidden in my eyes?

So I'll try,
because I'll never know
if either my world ends,
or continues on forever.

He walks,
unaware of the eyes that follow each step,
unaware of the hearts he absentmindedly carries in tow.

That boy,
what a beautiful diamond he is.

He shines so, so, so bright
that I'm almost blinded.

Almost, because if I let myself get blinded,
I'll risk never seeing the boy that has become the muse of my work.

I see him everywhere;
in the spaces between each star,
in the pages of the books I have yet to discover.

I believe that the world works wonders,
and what a wonder that boy is.

at 7 am
i'll love you in soft whispers
and white.

at 12 pm
i'll love you in yellow
and the blinding sunlight.

at 3 pm
i'll love you in soft browns
and the pit-a-pat of the rain.

at 11 pm
i'll love you in warm bedsheets
and wishes of forever.

i give
and give
and continue to give
even if i know it hurts,
even if it hurts
and keeps on hurting.

this is what's sad about
loving too much.
you give your all,
every single inch of skin,
every single tick of the clock,
every single breath i breathe.

and i know it hurts,
and it will keep on hurting.

but that is what love is.
finding the end to the hurt
until the only thing you feel
is peace.

it's scary
to think that the possibility of meeting you
wasn't as slim as i thought it would be
that i'd look into your eyes
and feel that tickle in my stomach
i'd be red all over
because i finally have the chance
to say all the words
i still have yet to piece together
and i'd finally be able to
hold onto the moment that i
never thought would ever happen

loving you is a war
i never thought i would fight in.
but here i am,
on my knees,
hands in the air,
yelling of my surrender
to you.

do you want to know a secret?
when you smile
the stars glow brighter
because they want to prove that they could be brighter than you.
when you walk
the flowers that watch you get jealous
because how could the amount of beauty you hold outnumber the amount of petals they have?

do you want to know a secret?
when you look my way
my heart aches
because i can't believe you are close enough for me to grab,
close enough for me to tell you
i love you
and no star or flower can ever beat the love i have reserved for you.

He was my sun, every single planet in my body revolved around him.

The days seem so much longer when I don't meet the light of his gaze.
It was agony.

Every moment we are together,
an hour seems like one second.
It was in these moments wherein I knew what happiness felt like.

I hope I don't grow old like this:
depending on the few days I'd have by your side.

Everyday I'd pray
for a chance that gravity
can grant me my one wish.

My wish of being in his orbit,
and he in mine,
for eternity.

i truly believe
that you are made of stardust
and flower petals.

I hope you find happiness
whether it be under the spotlight
or simply just under the sun.

I hope you grow wise
that whoever seeks advice
may come to you with no hesitation

I hope you reach your dreams
so that you can freely say
that you've worked hard for everything that will come your way.

I hope you have love in your heart
so that you'll find more reasons
to keep going.

and i pray for the day
that you could be mine
like how i am wholeheartedly yours.

My head,
that used to dream of darkness and the bad,
now only dreams of you.

I wake up,
a headache rises in the depths of my brain.
I seek the warmth of the person I still long to hold.

I wish you were here.

sunlight streams
through my curtains
during the first few minutes
of ten.
i start my day anew.

i'm walking through
the thick streams
of faces i've never seen,
and then i meet your eyes.

a face i have yet to name,
yet my heart already calls you
its lost, now found, lover.

i found love in you that morning.

i start my days anew.

i start my life loving you.

this boy made me love
more than i ever thought i was capable of.

he's got my everything
yet he is my everything.

I have so many
dreams and wishes inside of me
that I can only imagine
will come true.

The big blue ocean
it hypnotizes me;
it gives me hope that maybe
there is a road that is meant for me
to walk on.

So I'll let the wind guide me
and the sea lead me
to that small island
that will show me
just who I am meant to be.

maybe time
is only helping me prepare myself
for the infinite possibilities of you.
maybe time
is letting me gather my whole being
in hopes that you would accept it, too.
maybe time
is giving me the chance to be broken,
just so that i could be fixed by you.
maybe time
is making sure
that i would be deserving
of the love that is yet to come.

i was never good at
explaining how i feel
through words.

which is why it surprises me
how easy every syllable comes
and goes
when i hear your name.

don't look at me
with those eyes that
were born from the sun.

don't hold my hand
and promise me adventures
of never ending wonder.

don't smile at me
and tell me words
that i cannot decipher
as truths or lies.

just don't,
i might end up loving you more than i do tonight.

love is
a cycle
that starts with me
and ends with me
in pieces

i now know why the stars fall
and why the sun rises.

they fall and rise
because it's their only chance
of seeing you.