My smile says, you got me again but inside, your words have gutted me,
Like walking into a room full of Simon Cowells,
And losing my voice
Yes, in fact
You took my voice from me
This game we play where we both bear our fangs for alpha-female in our sick, twisted trio
But the difference is this
I do not make the haughty stabs that you inflict upon others
Flicking your tongue like a silver blade, and I, your waiting victim,
Am here, readily awaiting your torture because I don't know how to make other friends
So I let the violence continue
Maybe my ex was right about you
Maybe you're the reason why if it weren't for my hemophobia, my wrists I would slice,
But pills suffice
My smile says, you got me again.
-E (c) 2017
everyone deserves forgiveness - but I thank every star in the sky you slammed the door shut on my fingers
( they told me she was toxic )
and I wrapped them up but I still would have let you back in,
played any song you liked honestly.
( and you didn't deserve that kind of generosity )
she moved to that island she always talked about and sent me a letter this morning that I didn't have the courage to read. If she asked me to knit her one more damn sweater for the windy nights I thought I'd vomit.
( freeze )
People that we never met
Are becoming our best friends
Their loyalty and love is pure
Reminding us that we matter
In times when we forget it the most
Casually talking through years of our life
Instances far away suddenly matter
A person far away means the world
Darkness dwells in despair,
his conviction succumbed to slumber, beyond repair.
Detested and abhorred, he laments in anguish,
his existence tainted by his own blemish.
Besieged and shackled by solitude,
somber thoughts pester him in multitude.
Piercing through the realm of gloom,
emerges the firefly sparkling in full bloom.
Overwhelmed by the pleasant intrusion,
darkness asks a question.
What brought the beautiful stranger to his desolate ocean?
Twinkling with fervor, the firefly pleads to be his companion.
“Dear Darkness,it is within you that my
radiance is so resplendent,
luminescence so ardent.
Dear darkness, it is without you that my
purpose is so insignificant”.
I'm a stand-up comic, no joke
Please sit down, give me some hope
This laugh meister has it tough out there
Doing my tight five, flying without fear
But you, yes you, maybe could save him
Give him the courage to carry on
Look, I've got a college education
I'm fun, at least when I'm not brooding about why some joke failed
I know, it's just a bit, but it puts me in jail
Which is why I need you at least to talk to me
I need to sit down
I won't try to make you laugh
I need a friend, you see
is an egg ever left out of the egg carton?
or a red crayon out of a pack of 24?
what about the right-foot-sock or the left-hand-glove?
did the husband ever forget about his wife?
well, maybe sometimes
but i would never forget about you
the group of white sheep
and i the black
roaming around aimlessly
searching for friendship
for an invitation into your bountiful pasture
where you graze day after day
and where i stand on the other side of the fence gazing in
wondering if you'll notice me or my efforts
or anything really
do you notice anything other than yourselves?
can you see over your side of the fence?
do you even want to see?
i am the egg
i am the red crayon
i am the right-foot-sock and the left-hand-glove
do you know what happens to things that are lost?
they are eventually found
the truth will
come to light.
peaking through the
bottom of your door frame--
to this day,
insist at you to open
the door and let that light
that healing grace
cherish your skin.
and I know that you
have lived in this darkness
longer than anyone thought
longer than anyone could
possibly deserve to
and I know that
right now it is easier
to stay hidden in the shadows
of lies that grant you comfort,
I know you will see the light
and yes, tears will flood your eyes
as you mourn the hours
wasted away in the nothingness
of self-conscious denial
but you will find
all of the hope you ever needed,
or we'll give it to you
One day the truth
will come to light,
I know you're strong enough
to find it
I know the truth is
begging to be found.