"inactions" poems
~for those who will read this and weep~
*the quiet ones,
the silent Job ones,
who quote not from the
Book of Lamentations,
but author their own,
based on-the-job experience
localized versions of cryptic elegiacs
accepting the wooden crosses borne,
stepping up to the
unrequested unforeseen,
then buried under, burnt alive,
yet never relieved by dying,
nailed by words, stronger than iron,
promises sworn, promises kept
with no ending date relief,
promises by and to themselves,
but not for themselves!*
*the wearers of crystal glass shackles,
adorned with decorative locks for which
no key did the maker make,
nor any divine creator
dare conceive an early release,
never no escape contemplated,
for the lock human, unrepentant unbreakable,
a decorative useless metaphor gesture,
a blunt “life ***** advertisement
I compose amidst a
bus pond of mismatched city folk,
a tapestry of ages colors and differing views on god/no god,
none would believe that as the bus sways me,
it’s in rhythm to holy choral music,
hundreds year old,
divinity masses and motets worships,
where one human can hide temporarily
a safe house,
to calm his questioning relentless
from the horrors of no answers,
for when the mind has no solution
to the rough and tumbling lives,
lived in glass shackled confinement,
the poets desperation equals theirs*
*summon eagles to transport these imprisoned,
but the shackled refuse,
I come to them but they wave me off,
I go crazy for once I was enslaved,
thirty years war that left devastation,
from which so many poems created
so I speak with heightened regard
of one who planned futures for others where his
non-existence was a founding father (ha!)*
*but the day came and
I was released by my own inactions,
but means nothing until a way to
away found
to release the yet bound early*
got a couch, airline miles, hundred dollars
in my pocket and an unrelenting need
to save them, a consumption disease,
the glass shackled, at ease,
won’t rest till all are freed
this my creed
no one left behind
these cyber words do not mock
for they are unbounded, set free,
when
the flesh connects and the needs of the flesh
are stronger for they are in heart conceived
Jun 23, 2018
Jun 23, 2018 at 5:45 PM UTC
How deeply the lie was conceived
in a gospel of faith and ignorance
How easily the people were deceived
to separate through intolerance
Truth is powering the commotion
A hunger reminds the desire
Reaction is empowering the emotion
Friction sends us the fire
Who will burn their skin
Lying on life’s beach
Who will turn within
and practice what they preach
Who will feed the flames
Who decides the names
Fear
Ego
Pride
They have a book…
the ghost-writer’s lied
Concealed in symbols
Hidden in signs
Revealed in geometry
and between the lines
In passages
are messages
In shape
In colour
In sound
“Man, Gnow Thyself”
so ‘Self’ is found
Who can see
beyond the distractions
What will be
the cost of our inactions
Annihilation of the Way
Co-creation every day
YOU DECIDE!
© Verso-(David Moule) 16/01/08
Sep 19, 2010
Sep 19, 2010 at 5:31 PM UTC
I once was a Person far too set in my ways
to realize how much what I didn't do
hurt the person I love.
I one was a Person too consumed by Self
to see past it's Illusion
and into the beautiful Truth of my life.
I once was a Person lucky enough to be close to you;
and though you say I didn't fail, I sure feel like I did.
I may not have failed you, but I sure failed myself in the process.
Maybe I didn't, but it sure made me think
about how I could change;
and Change has been made.
I'm sorry for the things I did that I shouldn't have
and for the things I didn't that I should have.
I'm terribly sorry my actions and inactions
made you seek your course of recourse.
I hope you can find it in your heart to give me another chance,
I know you may well not want to, and I don't blame you;
Time can be good.
To quote another poem of mine; Age:
"It does take Time
to find and travel your Path,
but it can begin at any Time,
and one can stray at any Time."
I'm sorry I strayed.
I think it can begin anew.
More beautiful.
We had something.
What's gone is gone.
We have potential.
We can begin anew;
begin something new
and more wondrous
than either of us can imagine:
I think we can grow together,
You nourish me.
I want to do the same for you.
I love you.
I miss you.
I adore you.
I miss you so much.
You complete me.
I know it sounds cheesy.. but it's true.
Last weekend at the wedding
when I laid down with you sobbing
about the things I was sobbing about
I had a realization:
I can see myself marrying you;
perhaps not quite yet, but I'd be down.
Normally thinking of marriage freaks me out,
but with you it doesn't.
It would be an honor.
You push me towards a better me
even if I've unintentionally resisted:
(That's part of what's changed
I see how I've been resisting now.
Sorry it took so ******* long ><)
You got me to write things down and share them.
You got me to try new things and to push my comfort zone.
You inspire me to pursue my passions;
to not be ashamed to get in front of People and share them.
You think in ways that the Ordinary can't even imagine.
You make me feel like I belong and that I am loved..
Something so very precious is being lost;
within me
and between us
I really hope we haven't thrown all hope out the window.
I think we have something far too dear to just toss out.
We both need to change, for ourselves and each other,
but I feel that we can do that together. Perhaps better.
I'm really truly sorry it took me losing you
to make me realize what I already had in you.
I'm really sorry it took what it took:
I'm really sorry it took so much Time.
-
I was stubborn and stupid.
I strayed.
We all can.
I value things differently now.
We all should.
My Shadow and Ego had been puppeteering my Mind,
but I've felt the metamorphosis, the renewal, the cleansing;
the Change has crept up and consumed me.
My Worldview has shifted, from the inside turning out.
The World is more beautiful now;
and so are you.
You are the full Moon
in the night of my Mind.
I know I truly love you.
[Please, Forgive me.]
Jun 4, 2013
Jun 4, 2013 at 1:31 PM UTC
Worship His Lordship,
Brace up timely solace,
Before you are befooled,
No syntax would serve,
When death comes to date.
Believe in boundless bliss beyond ….. 1
Oh Dear, desist from desires,
That govern mundane mandate.
Blessed are you, whatever deserved,
Of your actions, or inactions past,
Be content and devoted,
To your duty, serene and supreme
Believe in boundless bliss beyond ……2
Concealed by shiny silky skin,
Beauty is one of flesh n’ blood,
Glow or glamour is never forever,
Introspect and respect the truth,
Let not illusion overtake your wisdom.
Believe in boundless bliss beyond ……3
Eventual, life bubbles off,
Like a droplet on lotus leaf,
Conjured by complexion,
Concluded by deadly disease.
Believe in boundless bliss beyond ……4
Kith n’ kin crowd around,
And enjoy the fun and frolic,
Of youth, of health n’ wealth.
As the age anchors in sickness,
No referee comes to your rescue.
Believe in boundless bliss beyond……5
Sprint is the spirit of life,
The Soul holds the body
The day the Soul skips away,
Even your wife walks astray
Believe in boundless bliss beyond……6
Fun n’ play rein budding life,
Youngling passions linger fore,
Hoary age diminishes in distress,
None to come along, nothing to impress,
When the dusk dawns on you,
Too late to mediate and meditate.
Believe in boundless bliss beyond…….7
After all, what are you!
Of whom are you?
Who your wife and children are?
Are the bonds you made binding?
What is your origin or horizon?
Ponder over the divine marvel
Believe in boundless bliss beyond ……8
Feb 6, 2015
Feb 6, 2015 at 8:43 AM UTC
few people
who tell me to forget
about the past
just fail to understand
that sometimes past
doesn't forget me
They fail to realize that
one is still in the battlefield
dodging bullets surviving attempted ******
my war is still ungoing
but as always chances are
I survive like I often do
by unseen forces
its a cruel ancestral
karmic war
that must be paid
no one is immune to it
no matter how prosperous waiges of sin generating good and bad Karma are unstapable
ask me I've lived it in the flesh
wining or losing
doesn't matter too much
it doesn't depend
on the self alone
One has to experience
cause and effect
of all actions and inactions
perhaps generational
values apply here
must perform my deed
suffer their bad karma
what can I as a recipient
do but endure
please don't say to soldier me
in this battlefield hell of mine
"forget the past! look forward!"
"Don't look back,
you'll crash and die!"
my forward might be more
of the same battlefield
****** neverending
generational type war
unprovoqued covert enemies
ever popping up
like agents in my Matrix did
unexpectedly
using different names
covert culprit Terminator One others wearing masks
hungry wolves
some in sheeps clothings
others smiling snakes
in my fallen paradise
many have fallen though
by my side and something
out there from beyond spares me
the people of God shall taste poison and it won't harm
the Lord upholds me and I wait patiently safe
heaven is within me.
Jul 11, 2019
Jul 11, 2019 at 4:38 PM UTC
Am I losing hold?
In a hurricane thought storm
Little deaths on the television
Remind me of my inactions
Said I’d even myself
Out, after giving into self
Doubt. Unstable, leaning toward self
Harm, while the world tumbles itself
Round
Bitter at my own lack
Feel the fire dying in my breath
While the world
Burns and breaks and blisters in a growing wreck
Did my stutter break another heart?
Did my whisper **** that child?
Too quiet for him to hear the reason
I searched for myself, at sixteen
Is every stilted thought, wasted potential / opportunity
To better myself, better the world,
And every person I'll ever meet?
I will not let
Hesitation
Separate
Soul from body
Ever again
I am not lifeless
I am not cruel
I will not be a bystander
I swear
I am not lifeless
I am not cruel
I will not be a bystander
I swear
Ever again
Mar 12, 2014
Mar 12, 2014 at 5:50 AM UTC
Do i drag you down,
to the depths of myself
when i tell you
of what i have seen,
what i have felt,
what i have done
and had done to me?
Do i belittle you
to the size of myself,
with the stories of my past,
all that i've done.
all that i've hurt
and all i've avoided
the other lives
I used to lead?
Do i make you
to shake in your bones,
when i speak of my actions
and inactions
my screams and my cries
and most deafeningly,
my silences?
Do you pity me
or do you fear,
my child,
all i have failed to do?
Jun 30, 2015
Jun 30, 2015 at 2:57 AM UTC
I rather live this way
or i go my way
for everything i couldn't do
for every path i couldn't go
for all of my actions
and all of my inactions
i'm but my own foe
for to all i have regreted of,
my hands had deviced
i'll go my way,embrace my fate
for all i've met i'm but part of
i'm the little boy of yesterday
that has turned to the young man of today
awaiting the matured man
of tomorrow
i've loved without returning
i've been broken countless times
but healed with time and tears
i've cried a river
i've known life just like the blood in my veins
i've learned to take things as they come
Until i can change them
to close my eyes from my desires
until i can command my wish
in living i've learned to live
live without hurt
live without broken heart
live without crush
But that's not living,it's dying
No mortal can live beyond broken heart
none can tell his heart what to feel
as blood in the veins so we're bound to love
There be nothing more like
to love and be loved in return.
Jan 3, 2014
Jan 3, 2014 at 2:50 PM UTC
The ground is in shambles beneath me
Each step I take the Earth quakes
Bedrock shadows in their wake
Tremors pulsate in resonating song
Harmonizing the splitting migraines
Perceptions fail in this fallen Kingdom
The light swells in the timeless void
Eons and eternities cascade in flashes
Ripples of the endless forevers
A brain freeze, frozen purgatory
Inactions reflect on this broken plane
Distorted mirrors of yesterdays
Shattering slowly into the morrow
Feb 22, 2016
Feb 22, 2016 at 9:17 AM UTC
What is it that I crave for?
What is it that I want?
I have lost myself in time
I am guilty of the crime
I am standing middle of nowhere
I don’t know which way to go?
The standing ground gives a tremor
The thought makes me quiver
I have lost all the interests
The things I used to hold dear
Now those are my distant past
Nothing makes anything clear
What I want now?
This question keeps me awake
How will I shape my future?
The answer is yet to remake
I reach out for help
I reach out for support
The only thing I see
More questions I can bear
I am standing in a place
Where there is nothing
Even the darkness elude me
The light has gone beyond the reach
I know I can be many things
I have lost the will to see
Everything seems so unreal
Don’t know where it will lead
The things I once held so dear
Now they are against me
I am lost and so unclear
I even can’t see me
I cry for the enlighting visions
Those once were my souls
It seems I don’t have my eyes
The blindness have made me sore
Where I will find the answers?
When I will know what to do?
My inactions became my action
My action got lost in roar
The burning fire inside my veins
Washed away with time
The dream, the passion, the pain
Got replaced by desire to fail
Books say past is past
Live in the present
But how should I act in now?
To make sure I see tomorrow
What is it that I am going through?
What is it that I want anew?
My course of life has changed
Everything I have built, now chained
I want to be free
Free of all the decree
I want to know how I became
How I became like thee?
What is it that I am looking for?
The faraway land is waiting for?
I should let go of the fear
Thrive again to achieve the spear
Enough of living in the denial
I have to act and stop being senile
Accept that I have failed
I the one to be blamed
Time is now to rise once again
Like the phoenix and empire in ruin
The lost can always be found
The doomed can always be crowned…
Jul 4, 2013
Jul 4, 2013 at 9:42 PM UTC
Some say I'm too tough
Hard to comprehend
Hard to deal with
Hard to love
Some say I'm too soft
Easy to push over
Easy to manipulate
Easy to love
It is hard to explain
Easy to cave in
Just shut up
And let the others do their thing.
Think what they want
Do what they want
Hold no one accountable
For their actions.
We all mess up
We all have faults
We all have lives
After All.
But if we hold no one
Especially ourselves
Accountable
For our actions
For our reactions
For our inactions
Then how do we live?
Responsibility is a big word
And a bigger deed.
We are in this life
To learn
And teach
Every moment
Every breath
Every heartbeat.
What we get out of it
Is up to us
Alone
Individually
Subjectively.
We can do no more
Good
In this life
In this world
In this universe
Than to be the best
Student
Teacher
Partner
To everyone around us
Including ourselves
That we can be.
We must not judge
That one person's way
Is better than another
Simply that it is
A different point of view
A different way of living
A different style of loving.
The blind can get along
Without the one-eyed man
And if he thinks himself king
Because of his sight
It will only be until
The novelty of him
Has worn off.
For the blind have
Everything mapped out
Each step counted
Every object
Accounted for and memorized.
Those with sight
Move things around
Step outside the lines
Wonder what is beyond.
We can no more
Cause someone to awaken
Than we can restore
Sight to the blind
Hearing to the deaf
Voice to the mute.
Though we can offer them
New ways to explore
Their world.
Tell our tales
Without expecting
Any of it
To be heard
To be understood
To be believed.
For us to try to understand
Within ourselves
That all find out
Exactly what they need to know
When they need to know it
In ways only they can know it.
And sometimes
We are the messenger
Bearing tidings of great joy.
And sometimes
We are the lunatic
Ranting unheard on the corner.
It doesn't matter what you think
You are
Except to yourself
And you can never
Ever
Make someone see you
Any other way
Than the way that
They do.
Words
Actions
Beliefs
Are up for random
Interpretation.
And if you want to be
Unconditionally accepted
For your unique being
Then it's time to ante up
Folks
Because
Turnabout
Is Definitely
Fair Play.
May 2, 2010
May 2, 2010 at 9:15 PM UTC
From the Prayer of Saint Ignatius of Loyola (see notes)
<>
the phrase grabs my eyelids,
a forced opening,
nay,
a denial of closing,
our most human
and natural
escape hatch
and I wonder…
is it self~slander,
or is it the obverse,
that explores a desire
to enumerate honestly
for what is…is…
let the costs count us!
is that it?
merely
poetry
airy escapery,
what passes
for t r u t h in
these dark days?
<>
the damning costs count me
in their number!p
as ******
<!>
hapless victim of living,
pondering ponderous
divination of saintly
defiant definitions
of ‘greater good’
’tis the difficile,
entre the pill and the
bitter, oh so bitter the herbs,
for it is
so plainly & so hard
to differentiate, et
distinguer mais être distingué(1)
distinguish tween but not to be distinguished
memories that are costs disguised,
reverting as dreams, in the true~alone
hours of the twenty four, when it’s
just you, & fighter and worthy opponent
them costs,
who needs no definition
tolling the steeple bells
of utter anguish,
as you're thre greatest living expert
in these matters,
(le plus personnel)
the sins of action and transaction,
And the worst, those truly heinous
inactions,
face off in opposition in the boxing ring
<>
and the costs paid, a savage skilled
opponent, intimate of your every trickery,
the bare knuckled brawler, whose knows,
knows! the true tally, the bodies you’ve
buried, the children witnesses to your
creative abominations, lies you tell no
one else, but yourself- every single day!
the urge to cease here
grows stronger by the second,
minutes past and les défenses have risen,
what disclosures revelations bring forgiveness?
this my spotlight,
caught in the headlights,
where fessing up is in reverse,
fessing down to the black bottom,
where ugliness is the normative and
vain attempts at denial offers no escapes
from glutinous disgusting mess of gelled of
nothing but the truth
nah,
you don’t want to know,
what a human can accomplish
in a short seven decades of decadence
and recount constantly the costs of consternation
<>
so I‘ll let you
retreat to the gray masses
all your own where your very
owned
wonderings
are intercepted
for where I go now
willingly, unfailingly,
failing
needing not, requiring not
no company
Jul 13, 2024
Jul 13, 2024 at 7:17 AM UTC
I use to put on different masks
Every day and every night so
I can fit in with certain people.
I use to be shy around everyone
Because I do not know if they
Will judge me if I open my mouth
And say one word like hey.
For the first time in a very long time,
I am not longer shy whenever I am
In your presence because you have
Broken the different masks that I wear
And you have found the true person
That I really am and the person that I
Want everyone in the world to see.
For the first time in many years, I don’t
Have the need or urge to question myself
About my actions or inactions because
I know that you will never judge me like
I am afraid everyone in the world will do
If I open my mouth to them to say hello
Or even when I try and start a conversation.
For the first time in my entire life, I don’t
Have to hide my emotions and true feelings
Behind my poems because I was afraid of what
You and anyone who read them might think.
I used my poems as masks every day and night
Because I don’t know how to show my true
Feelings in words without writing them down.
For the first time in my twenty-one years, I can
Actually say that I am no longer depressed. When
I am around you, I am floating high on a cloud and
I do not want to fall back to Earth and back to reality.
This is a great feeling and I don’t want this to end
Because I am afraid of what my happen and of how
I might feel when this feeling leaves my body.
I am enjoying my life for the first time and
I am enjoying spending every moment with
The one and only person that makes me happy
Whenever I am with that one person. I am happy
That for the first time in my entire life I no longer
Have the need to wear any mask because my life
Is perfect now when I am with that one person.
For the first time in my existence, I have met that
One girl that makes me the happiest man on the f
Face of this beautiful blue and green Earth: you.
Feb 26, 2012
Feb 26, 2012 at 6:21 PM UTC
H a v e y o u s e e n
The sky where our eyes meet,
The air where our skin touch,
And the sun that put flames,
To our hearts?
The pounding of the birds' wings,
C a n y o u f e e l ?
H a v e y o u s e e n
How time made us blind,
How our inactions **** our mights,
How clouds made us doubt,
The vision once clear we had?
And as the plants grew
At spring,
C a n y o u s e e ,
How they blossom
alone in numbers,
Just left at is
For every person
To wonder?
H a v e y o u s e e n
The smoking poison,
On your palm,
To **** every living,
With a touch
By sending them to ash?
And how it made
You feel thorns
Growing on your soul
Because for once
You believe you are cure
But for some you are
Death for sure.
And thus,
You live like a bird
Who only lands
To a place
Where your pounding wings
Can be heard.
Where the only cage
To trap you dear
Is t h i s w o r l d .
Jun 30, 2017
Jun 30, 2017 at 8:54 AM UTC
Is it?
What do you think? Is it?
Have you felt it is?
Do you really think it is?
How do you know love?
Does it have it highs and lows?
Does been in it feel like a law?
Does its dark side appear white as snow?
What distinguishes it?
Few times down other times lit?
I thought it was always in high spirit?
Why now do I feel I have to desist?
Is it same as infatuation?
Where it goes away after you've achieved love action?
And all your sweet ideas become sour notions?
And thoughts of the other exits your attention?
Yes. Maybe its infatuation.
Love sparks that light but fades with wiggly motions,
When one stops trying because you're no more an exception,
The little silly things you do become "expensive inactions" .
It hurts badly,
Sadly your undoubtedly not feel it rightly,
From the start that love wounds, you pretend nicely,
That you both can take it lightly.
But it hurts, with time when the usual things are no more,
When the long night bare no talk,
Sleepless nights come back as they were at first afterall,
You miss someone badly, but misses only harp in thoughts.
Maybe its not love.
Maybe you stopped trying
Maybe you aren't telling your honest feelings
Maybe you're making it difficult to be loved
Maybe you don't want to be loved
Maybe hear says have dimmed your love
Maybe you aren't too sure
Maybe you feel this love won't go anywhere
Maybe you feel you're not good enough to be loved.
Maybe you feel its not true love.
Is love difficult?
It takes time to know.
Its like a sling stone thrown,
It takes time to be known.
Genuine love finds you when you do things right.
Maybe today, tomorrow or someday,
When things are right, Love's not difficult,
It'll find you. You'll feel it Right.
Jan 15, 2019
Jan 15, 2019 at 7:14 PM UTC
For who have overcome the saddest sorrows,
We will never wish anyone else to experience it,
Because we know how much it hurts.
For who have gone through the deepest darkness,
We will always be the light to guide you through,
Because we know how scary it is.
I want to ask you one question.
How do you truly feel after you hurt other humans
Without giving them a chance to explain?
I want to ask you one question.
Have you truly thought about what you have or haven’t done
Before you got hurt by other humans?
A coin always has two sides.
A road can always be traveled both ways,
Even when it tells you that it is a one-way street.
Hate will never end hate.
Hate will only destroy everyone involved.
Forgive or forget, and so you can have peace.
Even if you truly believe that
Your actions or inactions didn’t cause anything,
Please, still try to understand from different perspectives.
Mar 15, 2022
Mar 15, 2022 at 9:19 PM UTC
Would that Hestia were in the Oval Office instead of **** Trump.
There would be warmth emanating from the veritable center of our
democracy instead of cold, cruel uncaring. Ignorance and gross incompetence are reasons enough for me to throw literally this imbecile out of the Oval Office into the Rose Garden, then onto Pennsylvania Avenue. He alone will be singly responsible for millions of deaths of Americans who contracted the coronavirus, but died from the unconscionable inactions of **** Trump that in turn resulted in myriad medical supply shortages that would have saved untold American lives. Hestia was the Greek goddess of the hearth. Even if she was a mythological figure, she would have at least cared about the well-being of the citizens of any Greek agora.
Copyright 2020 Tod Howard Hawks
Mar 26, 2020
Mar 26, 2020 at 1:01 AM UTC
it's the end of the world,
my friends.
the sky is falling,
the ground is shaking.
the entire earth is
spinning and rocketing,
twirling out of control
around its wobbly axis.
of course,
gravity's long gone,
and we're all just
floating around.
the sun's getting closer
by the hour,
burning holes in mountains
and evaporating oceans.
what's going to **** you?
a new disease,
a bout of heatstroke,
a boulder flying toward you at insane speeds?
another person?
the absence of another person?
your own boredom drilling its way through your head?
your loneliness?
your regrets?
what's going to **** you?
looking up into the stars,
only to see your own
sad, short lifetime
of accomplishments and inactions
spelt out in the gaseous twinkly orbs?
what's going to **** you?
Apr 21, 2017
Apr 21, 2017 at 10:09 PM UTC