There are days warring clouds raging in my head,
The hurtful scavengers are gathering large.
The wind howls like cats I'm worrying afraid,
Am I losing myself or am I still in charge?

The worst part
Is when
You begin writing for yourself
...
But by the end it’s for the readers
And your emotions
Are lost

My best friend was mine
Before the snooty girl stole her away
With the lure of a stupid fashion show instead of doing gymnastics on the bars
During recess
Like I wanted
What’s wrong with gymnastics!?

My first crush was mine
Before he got a BOY best friend
And then he picked HIM instead of ME to cut the cake
He was mine first!

She brought in a dream catcher
To class
I watched it’s beautiful blue beads and
Elegance
As it’s feathers were softly ruffled by the wind
But it was hers, only her nightmares were blocked
I have nightmares too!

They like her more then me
They laugh at what she says
They don’t care what I say
People look at her
They listen to her
Not me

In math class
She always wins the games
And gets all the candy
She’s the fastest
Cause she’s got all her facts memorized
Faster than me!

Everything
Everyone
Else

has best friends
get their crushes
has awesomer stuff than me
are cooler than me
are smarter than me
are better than me
are better than me
are better than me
are-
...

My god,
what a distorted perception of the world I’ve had!

I'm the best and worst,better than your first,
*******, but worse than Courtney takin' the Shotgun to Kurt,
Chick-Chick BOOM! too soon?-get the the **** out
I got more brains than the Cobains Greehouse,
He was in Nirvana...now maybe he's IN NIRVANA,

I don't know I'll leave it there maybe ask Buddha,
brutha believe me you can't deceive me,or relieve me,
even a trained hunting Dog can't retrieve me

Let's be Frank...
I leave rappers quieter than Helen Keller's beef with Anne Frank,
need enough Franc's for a trip to France to get some stamp's Franked...

Frank White or Frank Castle I'm an angry Irish *******,
arguments against me are simply facile,
sit the **** down, drop the Mic like a hot Spud,
afore you get stood all over by the Bull Stud,
I'm a ******* detector, Patriotic defector,
criminal Electors rippin' off the Exchequer
while I'm busy in your Ma's room strippin off her knickers!

I'm swimmin with an Army of ex Special Forces Women
to the Island offshore accounts are on Gunnin' and Grinnin,
constantly Sinnin' I'm Constantine slammin a Mirror offa Demon
Leavin your bird's face like a Doughnut glazed in *****,
dosin' every coffee cup in MIT with DMT,
Observin Scientists tip over at the knees like fallin' trees
new discoveries abound as PHD'***** the ground,
if Forest Whitaker fell in the woods would he make a sound?

My ground and pound will confound-verbal skills will astound,
next memory is wakin' up with a crowd around,
ye wanna step and test?,don't mean to be crude,
but ye must have a real taste for hospital food,
through a straw-thru a wired up jaw,
playing ****** up games like Saw,
ye shoulda saw the consequences when ya raised yer paw
yer Paw shoulda raised ye better bout raisin' fists to yer betters,
bunch of bedwetters tryin' to do a Man's job, forget it.

I'm the best and the worst,best friend-worst enemy,
big mistake offendin' me,don't need no one defendin me
but I still have a crew of real hard rocks,
the lads are used to the hard knocks,
you're used to the hard *****!
your faces are so shocked,
you just got yer snot rocked
now you're layin' face first cause you ****** with the best/worst!

The anger you put me through
I was at my worst
That I needed you

You are more than enough. You have always been. Never feel worthless just because someone made you feel that way.
You are amazing with your scars and imperfections.
Remember this, you are worth fighting for.

written by: Jed Castro

I haven't written a poem in a long time
I forgot how it felt to find the passion I once had for the words you once said, dripping from the same hands that once caressed you.
I think the reason why I haven't spilled my heart onto the white sheet is because I forgot how to feel,
and now that the blood stained feelings  i had showered onto the pure white paper, are gone,
i miss it
because when they were there
my hands were covered with letters to you.

My mind now is so overwhelmed with thoughts that miss the place they call home
but the place i use to call home isnt home to me anymore,
its your home
now that your gone,
your the only thing I seem to think about late at night,
living in my mind,
im infested with the what ifs and i miss yous I wish i could say,
but thinking of you inst enough to make me throw up the feelings back onto my lap, like seasonal flu,
a flu so strong that it makes you forget who you are and what you were, but after months of sleepless cold nights, laying on a bed of regret and covered with shame, thinking of what it was like to be whole again,
the season has passed and
your only left with the fear that you might catch it again,
the same fear i have
that once i start writing again,
i'm left to catch the feelings i had for you.