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lilhadi Mar 2020
It’s spring and it’s starting again,
the longing that begins and begins and begins.
Kim Addonizzio, from “Onset,” featured in “When She Named Fire: an Anthology of Contemporary Poetry by American Women.
lilhadi Jan 2020
“I lOve you”
Those words
                                      from her lips.
I believed her deceitful manner, her charisma; it was alluring.
I think most people take this as an s.o. but it could be anyone who stopped loving you a friend, a parent to just deceived you to get what they want from you. I also think of the devil to deceive you & feed you with lies to follow her.
lilhadi Jul 2019
"Just let me die. I'm so tired of this. These tears won't stop. Why the pain still lives in my heart? I'm so ******* tired..." I understand...
- Ana
From 11 JUL_postcomment
lilhadi Jul 2019
"When we think of “meant to be,” we automatically assume forever. But maybe it isn’t supposed to last forever. Maybe it’s just someone who is in your life to teach you something. Maybe forever is not the person, but what we gain from them."

- excerpt from a diary I don’t own. (Via southernsparkleandshine)
Source: southernsparkleandshine
lilhadi Aug 2018
The difference between a boy and a girl in moving on.
When it's over for a girl, it's hard at first, but it gets easier later on for her. At first, she'll be devastated. There will be many days she'll text him and show him that she wants to get back together. There will be many nights where she'll lay in bed and send him paragraphs before she sleeps. There will be many occasions where she'll lurk on his social media and see if he's with another girl or around other girls. There will be many times where she'll get mad when she sees him doing things without considering her feelings because in her mind, they're still together. She'll isolate herself and not want to be around other people. She wouldn't be in the mood to do anything eventful. She'll lose motivation in life and feel like it'll never get better because she depended on loving him for so long that she doesn't know what to do without him. But then, after some time, she realizes that maybe things are better off this way, maybe it just wasn't meant to be as she had hoped, and maybe it's time for her to stop waiting for him to come back. Eventually, she remembers how to be on her own. Eventually, she realized how she was fine before him. Eventually, she recognizes that the only person who deserves her love more than ever is herself.
When it's over for a guy, it's easy at first, but it gets harder later. At first, he'll feel relieved. There will be many days where he'll ignore her text messages because he doesn't have to deal with her anymore. There will be many nights where he won't care enough to reply to her messages because he's too busy partying. There will be many occasions where his Snapchat will be full of girls and it wouldn't bother him that it bothers her. There will be many times where he'll argue with her and remind her that they aren't together anymore so she should stop being crazy. He'll enjoy being around his friends. He's be up for meeting new friends and having new experiences. He will so happy that he's finally free to do whatever he wants because being with her was so straining that he had started to love her less and less until he didn't love he hard enough to try anymore. But then, after some time, he realizes that maybe the single life isn't what he wants, maybe it was foolish of him to treat her the way he did, and maybe he should step up and be everything she needed. Eventually, he remembers how much he adored her crazy personality. Eventually, he realized how much he misses her when he stares at the other side of the bed where she used to lay. Eventually, he recognizes how he ****** up on the one person he didn't deserve and was so lucky to have.
words by: teddie nguyen
lilhadi Jul 2018
I think I’m strong and I think I’m compassionate and I think I can make a difference in the world if I decide to but I hate you because you made me doubt that. Because out of all the things in this world to cry over, I cried over you. And after all the things that I’ve gotten through, I let you take me down. And out of all the better, more important things that I could have dedicated my time to, I spent hours thinking about you, talking myself out of calling you, wondering why you did what you did and what I did wrong. And you didn’t deserve that. Out of all the things that deserved my time, tears, effort, and passion, you were never one.
lilhadi Jul 2018
Love.! Love feels different all over the world, love is shown different all over the world; that’s just start depending by the family small interactions until to the personal final growth among the so called friends.  Now, looking back I finally realised I was so blind and every tear in front of my distracted face was a ‘cry for help to let me know that I’m badly losing you; baby girl I want to let you know that I’m so-sorry for making you feel diffident and I’m glad that you were there helping and supporting me everytime, beside that fact.  Even if those late-thoughts maybe will never make you change your mind, I’m still writing this down for both of us. Harmfully and insidious all the way, I destroyed your beautiful innocence and because of your enormously love for me, you let this...ungrateful child at that time, change your smile for eternity. Then, for sure the distance between us in the past time opened me a door to a totally new mindset with you as a mandatory focus point. It’s not about a second chance, I just feel like you are the chosen one and i don’t want to lose you because of my mistakes. As you can see, this time I’m hyper-aware regarding you, stuck on this idea and I will go for it until I’ll be able to make you see that there is us, two independent people making a deal that they will help make other person the best and happiest version of themselves.
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