A honey-wax candle, dusty on the shelf,
With a wick so white and naïve.
It's sweet flame and dusky embers never licked,
For on a shelf it sits, unlit.
It never had burnt down
To ash, but its sweet golden crown
Sits safe on a dusty shelf.

The battle is far from over, since the battle is yet to be won.
As of now in the present the battle continues.

The risk of failure of failure remains somewhere at the back of mind.
The thought about failure not only triggers, but also gives surge to an anxiety from time to time.

What now?
What next?
What else?

The battle continues.
Not only the battle needs to be fought,
also important is to fight the battle with a positive mindset and a never give up attitude.

Important to keep in mind the fact that a win in the battle is the only thing that needs to be achieved at any cost.

Agreed and accepted that winning and losing remains part of the game
Still it’s winning that makes the real difference
It’s winning that counts.

As and when you win, then only things and people around you change
Definitely everything will not change on it's own,
nor do the people around you,
it's the mindset that undergoes a change
It's winning that makes all the difference.

The outside world looks at winners from a different point of view.
So once you win, then things change for you.

The outside world will then look at you differently.
Even you have to change your views about the outside world and look at with the same level of difference in mind
At first you were no one,
now that you have won,
winning has given you an identity, a new face.

Definitely, then it will come to mind that it’s winning that has made all the real difference.
It’s winning that counts

Keeping in mind the fact that the battle needs to be won,
move ahead with a desire to win and fight the battle till the very last moment in time.

you are the shot
I couldn't make

the risk
I couldn't take

you are the star
I couldn't reach

the one
I always seek

With you standing at the edge of the cliff,
leaning over as if you'd fall
is how I have absolutely everything
at risk.

The first time you asked me if I trusted you, I said "yes"
The second time you asked, I said "it depends"
But when the third time came around I answered with a "no"
Because after all this time, how could I trust someone who lies, and omits, and only speaks with half-truths?
Someone who hides their feelings deep inside never to be revealed?
It's not that I don't want to trust you, but you don't trust me
And I can't risk another one of your betrayals, because it would **** me

its getting bad again.
i can tell.
around every dark corner its there waiting for me.
for the past four months depression has been subdued and had been just a back thought.
just a thought of suicide. never thinking if how or when
two days ago i felt my brain become fuzzy and unclear like it had before
i began to think about the act of killing myself.
i thought of hanging myself
i thought of overdosing
i thought of slitting my throat and letting my body bleed out
but instead of killing myself i broke a 4 month promise i made to myself
i cut myself
not deep enough to do much damage but deep enough to feel the pain and annoyance of fresh cuts
ive been so scared to get bad again and its back and its going to be worse than ever
the fuzziness is back and its constant
i dont have many clear moments  
depression blurs reality and brings in false perception of my moments
i dont feel right
nothing calms my thoughts
im becoming numb with fear of myself but ive never been so comfortable