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Anie Rose Tiu Mar 2017
As I lay my bed at night, I'm begging my covers to hold me tight.
Already closing my eyes but you're still in my sight.
Hugging my pillow while looking at the window.
Touching my own skin, I hope it was you I'm feeling.
I'll just do it over and over again pretending you are here.
Empiricprotagon Jan 2017
The waiting has blown
Exploding with fireworks
Showing new perks
Is it too early for revolution?

I talked too much about it
But haven't did anything

I flew from one hope to another
Deciding with greed
And new hope has came
Sparkling through every sight
Stumbling the lost hope over and over
Until it stuck and disappeared behind

Reality strikes all the happening event
Stunning every head until everyone realized
That they accomplished a big zero
From yesterday and long back then

So, plans happen
It happens every time but it keeps repeating
Cause all the heads doesn't give a s- about reality
We just keep pretending to be okay
ZT Nov 2016
The River*  *was calm
The Water was deep
what you didn't see was
**The Thousand Rocks underneath
A lot of times when the surface wont match whats under, but you'll never discover because it was clouded by thousands of layers
AD Snail Sep 2016
Always trying to be our very best,
Always trying our very best to be something we aren't.

Trying to act different from who we actually are,
Is more like a chore that you get used to doing all the time,
And when you don't do your best pretending as someone else, you feel ashamed?

Telling lies now so you'll be liked,
Even though your not like that at all.

Trying to fit in, but your pretending and lying,
Just so you can be this thing called "normal".

Us human being's, we are so weird,
Shouldn't we feel more ashamed of acting and lying
About pretending to be someone else then the other way around?
I always hear this word,
But they use it blindly,
As they project themselves downward,
In aspiral of chaos and confusion,
Leaving nothing but a meaningful weight,
That sends them to the feet of their hosts,
Like parasites that only know how to feed,
Sadly it is not in their capacity to realize,
That no harm and disgust is reflected onto their spirit,
But they continue to rot their own soul,
Excreting an immaterial gas,
Filled with toxins and emotions,
Feelings that make the insides of your stomach tumble,
Up and down then around the bounds,
Boundaries that they could never cross,
Because they are too young, maybe,
Too ignorant, slightly, remorsefully,
Going to schools and institutions,
Just to forget to ask, yourself that is,
And blissfully believing the facts that are handed down, like a vitamin pill,
A placebo that makes you smarter as it seems,
Beneath the soft exterior of a false personality,
Not fake, but inadequately you,
Not enough to be the own individual,
Living a lie handing down whatever the time dictates,
Never asking, why, because it is easy,
It is easy to fall away,
It is easy to hand out words,
That indefinitely hold meaning,
It is just a game of chance and luck,
In a head that refuses to ask,
It is so easy to make labels,
To project the self onto another who does not know,
To another that is seemingly ignorant,
But who is well aware,
But maybe decides to not give a care,
Never ceasing to wonder, why?
They are thousands of four letter words in the hundreds of languages,
And yet they choose to represent themselves in a word that they avert their ego.
Good ears, not eavesdropping, just loud whispers, and a paranoid mindset, given unending patterns, and stale overused personas
Eleanor Rigby May 2016
My days are busy with pretending
To be normal,
But my evenings, my love,
They're filled with either liquor
Or wanting you
So much,
So much...


-- Eleanor
ILL
In between the dizziness and confusion my ailments calm me. I don't care how disturbing and unorthodox it sounds. My loneliness accompanies me everywhere I step foot.

You said I could stay in your heart forever, you said all these things and made so many promises that at the end of the day your words hold no meaning. That was when I was a child and you really believed you loved me. But mom and dad I can see the pain you feel when you lie to me and tell me you love me.

I'm lonely and I like it.

Wake up. Wake up.

Can't you see I am awake? Can't you see I am just trying to take in all of the cold?

I'm trying to accept that the vacant spot in my chest is something more than a heart malfunction—this is real and cannot be diagnosed.

Father will you stay today.

No, can't you see I have better things to do

like dance with strange women and drown myself in liquor?

No father, I cannot see because I am blinded by the scars and faint screams that cover my eyes, can't YOU see that I am no longer asking you to stay, I am telling you.

They say that the drowning comes to an end—what if I can't hold my breath anymore.

She pretends like she doesn't know.

But mom, how can you not know?

Can't you see that I am a flame in a cup of water?

Are your own problems consuming your soul? Too tired of the world to hold your daughter. Take pity on me woman! What if I fly off the tippy top of the stairs like a bird? Would you hug me then? Would you cry to your dying baby?

But woman look at me! I am in fact dying. My heart is shedding its protective layer and your words are puncturing it. Can't you see that when you lie and steal my innocence it kills me?

My body is weak. I can feel my heart giving up on me. Something my soul needs.

Maybe I was lying. I am more than these bones, I feel love and I feel alone. I don't want to feel alone. It doesn't accompany me, it punches at my soul and pulls my hair out.

And like the guest of honor, the feeling of overflowing emptiness bursts through the doors of this house and finds its way up to my room, my mom's room, and my dad's room.

We're in a full house together but we're all alone. And it may seem strange to want to be alone and to want attention all at the same time. But if you were me for just a day you would understand that it's nothing but a façade. We're all actually super happy can't you see?

My mother hits my father and makes him bleed but we're happy.

My father pokes himself with needles and cries on the floor of my room but we're happy.

Are you going to put the dog to sleep?

No are you?

No are you?

He put himself to sleep.

And in the end I realize that if I were God we'd all be dead because darling we all get what we deserve.
listen to Putting the dog to sleep - The Antlers
Brent Kincaid Apr 2016
Wrap up all your games
And take them all away.
They might be fun for you
But I don’t want to play.

Sometimes what we think is luck
It isn’t that at all
It’s a series of bad decisions
That lead us to a fall.
You never seem to grow
Out of this kind of crap.
And smiling while you cheat
Is another kind of trap.

I don’t want to play
Take yourself away
Don’t come back here
Any other day.

You seem to believe
That finding the right words
Means your lies disappear
Like they were never heard.
You never get embarrassed
At the ugly things you do.
But it turns our stomachs
And embarrasses us too.

Wrap up all your games
And take them all away.
They might be fun for you
But I don’t want to play.

It’s almost like a game
You used to play as a kid
Where all of us were meant
To ignore the things you did.
This is not a playground
And we are not in school.
Once it might have been cute
But now you’re just a fool.

I don’t want to play
No matter what you say,
Today or any day.
Find somebody less aware.
I don’t want to play.
Kyle Kulseth Mar 2016
Well you wanna go out dancing.
I don't wanna leave my pad.
I won't loosen up this necktie 'til my head falls in my lap.
               Then you'd be lapping up my words
               that are
                     curdled,
                     soured,
                     absurd,
purchased with inflated currency
and sold off for a herd
               of sappy sentiments
          for worn-out, bought-up malcontents.
Yeah, you're believing anything these days...

And I'm far too good a liar
               selling real estate
          on toxic, poisoned ground.
Filling in all of these forms
and putting dumpster fires out.
               Standardized.
               Attracting flies...

Follow darkened circles down...

To my parlor. Find me cutting up and dealing
               out my cards
and doubling down on all the reasons
I've been feeding you.
               Repeating 'til it's my turn
               to start eating plates of crow.

Now you won't take any chances.
I'm a golem made of ash.
I won't fire up the big band. You won't come sit on my lap.
               I've been dishing out these words
               that are
                    used up
                    barren,
                    burned
far too long. The chafing dishes cooled
and all our vittles turned.
               Buffet line sentiments
          for naïve, hungry malcontents
starving to believe in anything these days.

Well you wanna go out dancing...

I'm not gonna leave my pad...
M G Hsieh Mar 2016
This secret, best kept away
from prying hands that drop
eyes on eaves and awnings.

They stay within
the perimeter of spies and agents
doubling as bartender ears,

drink up and pour
the punch that hits you where
you bleed invisible. The spleen

lacerating split, a penetrating
ooze, cleaves back and forth with you.
Drain out and glaze over. Be very,

very still.
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