Summer always was my trigger season
the time were always everything would change

my heart got broken more than once this year
every time you made me feel worthless another piece broke

this cruel summer
I have cried over everything that ever happened to us
I have died about everything that ever happend to me

I have learned how much my own happiness means to me
and that the happiness I always saw in us was dead

loving you was like selfharm,
I know how bad it was and still I could never leave

I needed you to leave first so I could see how much it changed me
the secret sharing stopped, you weren't my favourite person anymore

I wasn't my favourite person anymore

this summer everything changed
I've learned my first crush will be nothing than just a teenage crush
and that it's okay to cry over someone who isn't good for you

this summer I learned it's okay to feel totally ****** up
and that feeling like you are 16 again is totally fine

there is this new someone with beautiful rare eyes and an insanely beautiful smile who I can share my secrets with and be myself with

it's crazy how I can feel more loved and more special with you

you learned me
I am not too much and I deserve to be loved for everything that is me

There are things that you just wanna ignore
Never come back to
Forget
But their remains never leave
They're here to make a scene
To torment you in your sleep
To haunt you in your day
To stay
And you fight
Every ****** day you're alive
You fight
You put on a smile
You work you study you love you laugh
And you live
Some people don't, but you do
Because that's how it is.

I know I am lucky
To have someone like you
Who likes me even after
The **** I put you through
So why am I still unhappy?
You try so ******* hard
To break the walls of ice
Around this aching heart
I am perpetually grateful
For what you do each day
None of it is ever enough
To make my misery go away
What I long for above everything else
To make you laugh once more
Be the warm glow lighting up your life
Both of us feeling as good as before
But those carefree days are gone
Replaced by years of strife and pain
Now I’ll  never be your sunshine again
Instead I bring dark clouds pouring rain
My smile has badly broken
Like all our remaining trust
Here we are still putting
Together the pieces of us
Don’t think I don’t appreciate
The fact that you’re still here
Unfortunately your presence
Does not make my sadness disappear

You are perfect that’s plain to see
The problem is not you, but me

When you thought you're in the right bunch,
but no you're not.
When you thought it is the right hunch,
but no it's not.

When you treat them like jewels,
and you were just a rock.
When you were so little,
and they're high as ****

Do you have to stay when you know it hurts?
This will never happen if you just shut up.
Do you have to stay just to make it work?
This would never happen if you're not ****** up.