Hey, would you like to be friends, or
At least play pretend and
Have discussions that pass lifeless
Like a leaf being pushed by the winds.

You could even keep my shirt at your crib,
So years later you can forget
Whose even it is. Like remembering
Which kid drew this scribble
Hung up on the fridge.

Man, all these frayed connections are
Dimming the lights in this decrepit
Building. One huff and puff
Could turn this structure to rubble dust.

I have no mind to wink or blink
An eye, at one word half *** replies, unless
It reads goodbye. Tired of tap dancing
On the precipice of caring, or
Not caring less.

It was all fake
Fake from the start
Fake through my veins
Straight fake through my heart
Igniting my mind
To blow apart
Bleeding all over
This ******* art

But its okay
Because I have learnt
This was the last time
My fingers will get burned

I cannot trust
I cannot look back
From now on...
It's just Me
Van nou af is dit net ek

I saw a man crying alone in myself.
He was sitting on the chair and here I am telling you the story we have.
The window's there and the future's rare,
we looked at those from our eyes,
"I was there before, then the sadness's getting out", he says.
And right now, I see myself not to look at back.
A man has gone and I pretend that the past was fake.
All of the memories also out from the track.
Here I am the last one trying to finish the run I take.

Ooo! Your fake smile - what’s up?

I don't miss you,
I miss the person,
you pretended to be,  

I loved you for a facade,
It was just a counterfeit  
version,
you in a masquerade,

It would be impossible to miss
a person that never did exist.
You were just a fake.

As a child I was always the shyest in the room,
I never started conversation for fear of rejection.
Maybe it was because I never had a strong father figure growing up,
I strived to be perfect for everyone I met.
I carefully viewed those around me,
Taking in silent notes of the values, morals, and hobbies they held that were “popular”.
They had the best clothing?
I decided that I needed a whole new wardrobe.
If they traveled a lot, I wanted to travel just as much.
I took all of these things and “built” a better me.
One that I thought people would like.
Every morning I put on that mask for fear that nobody would like the real me,
But I’ve been wearing this mask for so long I cannot tell which is the real me from the imposter.
Which begs the question,
Who am I?

~sdr