Almost never was
what we became

somewhat tired
somewhat hungry
somewhat vagrant
huddled in the ether
of our aspirations

possibilities in ruins
like hieroglyphics
crushed into the rock
our song reduced to
ashes in the sand.

the something that we had
becoming vaguely mythical
and somewhat lacking.

© Ben Ditmars 2014

You can hold a pebble
in the palm of your hand.
But when it's been pummeled
and turned to sand,
no matter how tight
you clench your fingers together
it'll slip through your hands.
Oh how the damaged ones slip through time.
Forgotten n spread across shore lines. Where different waves reach their lips only be pulled away before they reach,

Untouched n unfaze they become apart of the maze.
Left,
Right,
Up or
Down,
It's such a confusing haze. Her walls are high n you'll never find the center place.

they all tell me
that my dreams are
s t u p i d .
I can never be what makes my chest swell in pride
I can never be what makes my breath come easier
I can never be what makes my heart pulse faster under my skin
I can never be who I need to be
because of their
s t u p i d
comments
telling me that my dreams
are incredibly
s t u p i d .

Of anything I feel now,
Of all the pain and regret,
The heart break and headaches...

What I fear the most is that she doesn't miss me.

We built this place.
Look around you,
We built it.
We built our home,
We built it all.
We built this life.
Don't you dare walk away
Saying that the fault was all mine.
Cause there's no 'I' in we.
We made the bed we lay in.
We made this.

I live in the dark
You tell me it’s better this way
Don’t have any dreams, they’ll only get crushed
I am scared of the outside world
The only reason why
Because you tell me to fear it

I’m like a puppet on a string
You’re in control of me
You tell me to move, I move
You tell me to sing, I sing
Because I have nothing to lose
But I want to cut these ties that bind us
But I don’t know how to live without you
I will spread my wings and fly
Because I will survive

You tell me don’t go
It’s dangerous out there alone
I don’t know how to be by myself
I’ll only get hurt if I leave
Won’t let you lie to me
I will not let these chains **** me

I’m like a puppet on a string
You’re in control of me
You tell me to move, I move
You tell me to sing, I sing
Because I have nothing to lose
But I want to cut these ties that bind us
But I don’t know how to live without you
I will spread my wings and fly
Because I will survive

Wish that I could undo
All those bad choices
All of those days spent with you
Wishing that I could be free
But not letting myself be happy
For fear of what would happen to you
But now I see, you manipulate me
Into believing I’m at fault
That won’ t happen anymore

I was like a puppet on a string
You were in control of me
You told me to move, I moved
You told me to sing, I sang
Because I had nothing to lose
But I cut those ties that bind us
I  know how to live without you now
I have spread my wings and flew
I will survive