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I don’t trust myself with you.
I’ve built myself a lonely cage.
I use my fear as my protector.
But sometimes, I open the cage.
Step-out to breathe in the fresh air of what could be,
then get terrified with the first breath I inhale,
and I go back in.
Because I’ve learned that the more people you let into your life,
the more vulnerable you get.
The easier it is for them to walk out.
And so I will suffer in silence.
Because I'd rather be lonely.
Than happy then broken.
I can’t promise I won’t cry
But I swear until then I smiled

And that smile I will never forget
Even when you forget me
sometimes you want to stay
and love them till they feel it.
sometimes you want to leave
and hurt them till they feel it.

sometimes you want to lie
so they won’t say goodbye.
sometimes you want to die
so they don’t have to try.

sometimes you want to wait
even though they won’t reach.
sometimes you want to run away,
afraid of the lessons they would teach.
P.B
viola 2d
your sadness transforms you
shapes you, molds you.
darling, don't fight it
its essential to your growth
Jane 2d
i click her name
i'd give anything to hear her voice

ring ring
-please pick up the phone

ring ring
-it's just me, i need to hear your voice

ring ring
-why are you always ignoring me?

ring ring
-maybe i should just hang up

ring ring
-you aren't going to answer, are you?

ring ring
-i just want to talk

ring ring
-i feel lonelier than before i thought about you

ring ring
-a single tear runs down my face

ring ring
-why am i not good enough?

ring ring
-i end the call

i pretend she's busy
but i know she's not

but i need to lie to myself
because the truth ******* stings

she doesn't want to talk to me
because i am not enough
Time
Everything stopped in time
When you walked in my life

Eyes
Those blue eyes staring back
Placed me under your spell

Touch
When your fingers touched mine
My mind went into a trance

Whispers
Those whispers of your desires
Made me a slave to them

A Kiss
A passionate kiss placed on my lips
Sealed the deal and locked my fate

Embrace
You entwined me in your embrace
Gentle, yet subconsciously Greedy

Enchantment
You kept me under your enchantment
Playing with me under your fingers

Trash
Thrown away like trash in an abyss
When you were done using me

Curse
The spell became a curse
When you took my heart away

Despair
You left me in despair
In a cage of your enchantment

Fulfilled
The enchantment became a curse
The spell remained only in my insanity
The dreams turned into vicious nightmares
Pushing me to the edges of my mind
These games have fulfilled their purpose
Costing you nothing
But leaving with my everything
Dumping some thoughts

Happy reading!

-J
fovo 2d
we painted
the colors of our love
into the sky

we wrote
our  names entwined
in the beach sands

we shouted
our promises of forever
in the mountain peak

we imagined
our future full of happiness
laying in the grass

and now we mourn
for our love
that died

now we shed tears
for our feelings
that dried down

now we dyed
our colorful skies
with grey

now we locked out
our possibilities
in our mind

and lastly
we now bid goodbye
to what once
never-ending
My Girl loves me despite
What i'm saying?
I'm not too high to realize
What i'm longing.
Too much difference between me and you
I need to take off my wings
I need to pull off my fascinations
I'm insane and my mind losted !
I'm stained around this pain
It's ain't enough.....

Through your sweet smile and round face
Where i'm belonging
I ain't feel alive without my phone ringing
selfish too much 'bout you
Despair but much i needed you
So you can love me much as i can?

To my all questions i ain't go shut up.
So why don't you admit it.
If you did with your choice.
I'm asking !
How far you've given me a space
Do i exist to your life
Do you wishing me right next?
Do you suppose me to kiss?
tight.
Do you suppose me to hug?
Holding me up for a while,
Effortlessly, you'd says  don't know!
Had you seen yourself at my place
Although never i'll meant you to feel hurt.
That's all i got instead,
In the name of LOVE.
19/07/19
My Girl loves me despite
What i'm saying?
I'm not too high to realize
What i'm longing.
Too much difference between me and you
I need to take off my wings
I need to pull off my facinations
I'm insane and my mind losted!
I'm stained around this pain
It's ain't enough.....

Through your sweet smile and round face
Where i'm belonging
I ain't feel alive without my phone ringing
selfish too much 'bout you
Despair but much i needed yoU
So you can love me much as i can?

To my all questions i ain't go shut up.
So why don't you admit it.
If you did with your choice.
I'm asking !
How far you've given me a space
Do i exist to your life
Do you wishing me right next?
Do you suppose me to kiss?
tight.
Do you suppose me to hug?
Holding me up for a while,
Effortlessly, you'd says  don't know!
Had you seen youself at my place
Although never i'll meant you to feel hurt.
That's all i got instead,
In the name of LOVE.
i didn’t want to write this.

not when you’re no longer laying next to me.
the warmth from your skin no longer seeping into mine.

i didn’t want to write this.
not without your hand intertwined with mine.
fingers wrapped so delicately around each other.

i didn’t want to write this.
not because it doesn’t hurt anymore.
i’m reminded of you every single day.

i really didn’t want to write this.
but i did.

because it still hurts that i wasn’t good enough for you.
it kills me that it seemed easy for you to leave so suddenly.
it pains me that you probably never looked back once.

but that pain is still there.
i promise you that.

so i guess i wrote this to remind you.
(or remind myself of you)
i wrote this to remind you that even 3 months, numerous attempts to say your name without the bitter aftertaste, and several poems later, it’s still hard to pretend that i was never close with you.

laying next to you.
my body warmth seeping into yours.  
fingers wrapped delicately.

you feel that?
it’s the pain,
still there.
She's desired by millions
But acquired by losers
She's survived those losers
But she still has bruisers
Reckless in who she chooses
Stubborn and pain oozes
From the greatness that she callously
Disregards
For she is broken in the heart
Picky girls
Making bad choices
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