I WISH I WAS BEAUTIFUL LIKE ALL THE OTHER GIRLS I PASS IN THE SCHOOL HALLS.
WHY CANT I BE PRETTY?
IM NOT SKINNY ENOUGH.
I WANT TO BE ENOUGH.
PRETTY.
BEAUTIFUL.
GORGEOUS.
BUT I GUESS ILL ONLY BE UGLY.

I'VE NEVER BEEN THAT GIRL ALL THE GUYS BOW DOWN TO.
IVE NEVER ACTUALLY MET A GUY WHO WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR ME.
NEVER BEEN A POPULAR PERSON.
NEVER BEEN PERFECT ON THE INSIDE OUT.
NEVER BEEN HOMECOMING QUEEN.
IVE NEVER BEEN ON A CHEERLEADING TEAM.
NEVER HAD GIRLS THAT WANTED TO BE ME.
NEVER BEEN CALLED PERFECT BY GUYS ON THE VARSITY FOOTBALL TEAM.
I'VE NEVER KISSED KEN.
BUT,
I AM ME.
I'VE BEEN THE GIRL WHO ALL THE GUYS HAVE RESPECT FOR.
I'VE BEEN THE GIRL THAT ALL THE GUYS CALL FRIEND.
I HAVE BEEN THE GIRL THAT HAS HAD IMPERFECT BUT PERFECT GUYS CRUSH ON ME.
I'VE BEEN THE GIRL THAT SPENDS HER WEEKENDS AT THE SKATEPARK OR RIDING DIRTBIKES.
IM THE GIRL THAT HAS SARCASM EVERYONE FEARS TO HEAR.
IM THE GIRL THAT WILL BE TOTALLY HONEST EVEN IF IT WILL HURT YOUR FEELINGS.
IM THE GIRL THAT CAN BE PRETTY.
IM THE GIRL THAT PREFERS SHORTS OR PANTS OVER SKIRTS AND DRESSES.
IM THE GIRL WHO LIKES FISHNETS AND COMBAT BOOTS.
THE GIRL THAT WILL GET CRAZY.
THE GIRL THAT DEFENDS HERSELF AND PEOPLE SHE CARES ABOUT.
I WILL GET IN YOUR FACE IF YOU GET IN MINE.
I WOULD RATHER HAVE ONE SPECIAL GUY THEN HAVE TWENTY FAKE GUYS.
IM THE GIRL THAT RESPECTS YOU IF YOU RESPECT ME.
IM THE HARD HEADED GIRL THAT IS STUBBORN AS HELL.
I DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH JERKS.
I PLAY HARD TO GET IF I FEEL THAT YOU WANT ME TO BE EASY.
IM THE GIRL THAT WILL KICK YOUR ***  IF YOU MESS WITH ME.

i want to be able to hold your hand while we walk by the ocean water.
be able to be crazy in front of you.
i want to jump on you in the morning to wake you up.
i would love to be able to fall asleep in your arms.
to feel your precious breath against my neck.
i want you to hold my waist and play with my hair.
i want you to tell me how beautiful i am and how you love every part of me.
i love you.
and i'd love to feel your sweet lips against my own..
to taste your smooth skin.
to save the taste of your lips

WHEN I FIRST MET YOU I KNEW YOU WERE THE ONE.
WE GOT TO TALKING AND WE SOON KNEW SO MUCH ABOUT ONE ANOTHER THAT I BECAME IN LOVE WITH YOU.
YOU SAID THAT YOU MAY BE FALLING IN LOVE TOO.
THE THING IS WE WERE SO FARAWAY FROM EACH OTHER.
OUR HEARTS BONDED AND THAT WANT BECAME TO CRAVING YOUR LIPS THE TASTE OF YOU.
IT BECAME A CRAVING.
I LOVE YOU.
AND I WILL ALWAYS.
YOUR ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE THAT I WILL ALWAYS CARE FOR.

Im done.
with life,
the world,
people who are fake as can be,
Im done with me,
myself.and I.
Done with the tension to do something right for once in my life.
The only thing right to do is go ahead and **** myself.
Everyone will be happier.
They won't have to see my miserable face,or the unhappy looks,they won't have to say hey just to make me feel like someone actually recognizes me when no one really does.
Im done
with the pity looks i get from people who don't even know what pity is.
Thats okay there virgins to the world only knowing the good,only faces the good.no bad in their lives thats good,okay,great for them but,one day they’ll wake up see whats really out there.
Flesh being torn apart,screaming,crying,****** tears.
then they’ll want to die step in front of a train that's passing by.
Its okay they’ll learn and then want to die but,if you stay a ****** to the world with no pity,no cries,no screaming,no one dies.
my world is much different always will be you might not be a ****** to the world but compared to me you are and you're lucky.
Because i’m dead never have been alive..always dead,never gonna be alive.

he said he loved me,
he said he cared,
he said he wouldn't break me,
he said he understood,
he said he loved me,
he said he would protect me,
he said he would help me,
he said he loved me ,
he said he cared,
he said a lot of things that i would die to hear once more.
his lips were addictive just like air,
he said he would stay with me,
he said he would be there,
he said he loved me,
he said he cared.
he told me he loved me.
he told me he'd be there.
he left me to hang.
left me to bleed.
left me to die.
left me to be broken one more time.
he snapped me in half again.
he lead me on.
he took what was mine,
and ran away.
he told me he loved me.
he said that he cared.
he said that he promised he’d always be there.
he lied like all the others.
i thought he cared.
i thought that he loved me.
i thought that he was different from the others but he was just a spare.
a fool to be so cruel.
a fool to sweep me off my feet,
then let me weep in a pool of my own blood.
i told him everything all my secrets and fears
he knew i feared to lose him
and he knew the game very well..
the game of love and the game of loss.
he knew i couldn't lose another soul
he knew id beg and plead for him to run on back to me
but instead he led me to my death
my heartbreak once more.
he told me that he loved me
he told me that he cared.
he told me that he loved me
he told me that he cared
he told me that he’d be there
he told me that he cared he told me things
ive never heard before.
he told me wild things that made my heart glow even more
he told things that i fell for
he told me that he loved me
he told me that he’d save me
he told me that he would protect me
he told me that he loved me once more
he’s just like the rest
they destroy
and ****
they only want one thing
they pretend to fall in love with you.
they tell you they love you.
they tell you they care.
they tell you they’ll be there
they tell you they’ll save you from your demons and terriers
you believe them
sometimes give in
you believe them
they kiss you,
cuddle you.
make you feel love.
you believe you can feel the warmth
but there is none
just cold
they take what they want
then they tell you basically that you're not enough.
that you can't give them what they want.
what they dream of.
they want perfection.
seeking for innocent blood
then they let you down easy
they turn mean and start to destroy you.
just remember they're just out for one thing
and don't let your guard down baby because if you do they won't stay long

i look in the mirror.
scared to see what i fear.
me.
ugly.
fat.
imperfect..
me.
i hate the way my stomach isnt flat.
my ribs dont show.
im ugly.
imperfect.
my arms have too many scars
so do my hips
and thighs.
what if they see?
will they notice?
i need to lose weight.
im fat..
imperfect..
ugly.

Leave me alone.


Leave me alone.
I dont want your questions or statements
Id rather not hear your fake *** complements that insist on still melting my heart even though you’re not telling the truth
Id beg for mercy so you wouldn't have to show me your perfect body compared to my fractured one.
Leave me alone.
before I let my demons crawl out of me and **** you.
you little innocent doll
you're a ****** to the world.
you don't know anything
including me.
your a perfect doll
i’m a rag doll.

Dear diary,
I miss myself.. the one who likes to smile and bring bright colors wherever she goes,
im not me anymore.
thats the sad thing for many  people they say they miss my big smile or my wonderful laugh.
i just nod and agree with them they say i still have it..the joy,hope the old me.
i know thats not true.
im not me.
im the one who became shattered,broken into bits because of them the ones who are suppose to love me,the ones who are suppose to bring and make memories with me.
the ones who are supposed to teach me how to trust,
the ones who are supposed to be trusted by me.

                 the ones who are suppose to be loved by me,    

the ones who have to be loved by me,
the ones who are loved by me but very little,
the ones who are suppose to help me when everything is falling apart!
i need them but, they're not here
i need them but they're not there.
for me.
it hurts to see them destroying each other..
including themselves..
they're bringing me with them,
im going down into the deep dark hole they call hell.
they're destroying me with them..
they don't even care!
how could they?
hello?
im alone now theyre dead.
help..
please someone..
they're not coming back .thats a lot like them to do that.
they're my parents,
family..
they matter to me,
i guess i dont matter to them..
i still love them though,
just like their innocent..
thats a lot like me to still love them.

i have a destination.
the destination is a mystery.
i dont know my destiny.
im scared.
what could be?
what could be my destiny?
i have a destination.
what could it be?
you sat there staring at me like i was crazy.
you whispered something in my ear but i was focused on my breathing.
he looked at me with those beautiful eyes.
he looked away.
i grabbed your hand and said look at me!
you looked at me
and whispered can i be your final destination i'll make you happy baby.
i whispered yes.
he looked at me with intense love.
he kissed me passionately.
i kissed him back.
i whispered in his ear and said baby.
you've always secretly been my destiny.
you've always been my destination..
baby i've always secretly loved you.

MY OLD LIFE WAS BETTER,
MY OLD LIFE WAS SIMPLER,
MY OLD LIFE WAS HAPPIER,
MY OLD SELF WAS WORTHY,
MY  OLD SELF WAS PRETTY,
MY OLD SELF WAS BEAUTIFUL,
MY OLD SELF WAS SKINNIER,
MY OLD SELF WAS USEFUL,
MY OLD SELF WAS PERFECT.



MY OLD SELF HAD CONFIDENCE,
MY OLD SELF HAD A HAPPY LIFE,
MY OLD SELF HAD A LIFE,
MY OLD SELF HAD A MOM,
MY OLD SELF HAD EVERYTHING,
MY OLD SELF LOVED HERSELF.
MY OLD SELF WAS LOVEABLE,
MY OLD SELF WAS LIKEABLE,
MY OLD SELF HAD A VOICE,
MY OLD SELF IS DEAD,
MY OLD SELF IS GONE,
TRAPPED BENEATH ALL THE PAIN,
THE ANGER IS FORCING BACK.
MY OLD SELF WILL NEVER COME BACK.






NOW I'M STUCK,
NOW IM LOST,
NOW I CRY,
NOW IM FAT,.
NOW I'M UGLY,
NOW I'M WORTHLESS,
NOW I'M HELPLESS,
NOW I'M USELESS,
NOW I'M IMPERFECT,
NOW IM SCARED,
NOW I'M QUIET,
NOW I'M SOLD OUT,
NOW I HAVE NO HEART,
NOW I'M COLD AS ICE,
NOW I HAVE NO FEELINGS,
NOW I'M USELESS,
NOW I'M NOT HAPPY,
NOW IM SAD,
NOW IM GONE,
NOW IM DEAD,
NOW I'M TIRED,
NOW IM HEART BROKEN,
NOW I WILL NEVER BE SAVED,
NOW I WILL NEVER BE SEEN,
NOW ALL ILL DO IS HID FROM THE TRUTH,
BECAUSE THE TRUTH IS BAD AND IT STINGS IT PINCHES ME WITH EVERY TOUCH.
NOW I WILL GO AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK.

I dont need help.
Maybe I do.
Do I?
How the hell would you know..unless you are in my head fighting the demons off..but you know that you’d  NEVER **** them..right??
Im talking to myself.
Is that crazy?
Insane?
******?
Does everyone talk to themselves the way I do?
I need help!
I’ve asked but,I ran away.
From help...thats how insane I am…
help?
Is there such thing?
Maybe.
Maybe not.
Well maybe not for me.
Help is a definition of **** me slowly..
When you ask for help you get tortured,humiliated your demons in your head scream and laugh at how much of a ******* wimp you are for snitching on them!
You will never get help if you're  in my situation you’ll only suffer your heart will only keep breaking and your demons will grow bigger.

breathe.
                                   breathe                           breathe.                            breathe.


i                bleed                    at           the                      thought                of
      
          being                           alone                             forever.
  
i                                  already                   am                          alone....



                                       forever.

you listen.
                                                                                    thats all that matters.
you love me
                                                                     thats all i'll focus on for now.
i love you.
                                                         please hold on to that with all the strength
                                          you've got.
please                                                  
                                                                  
                                  

                                             love me back

i thought the sun was bright.
you well your brighter.
you fill up the room with your talent.
you fill my mind with curiosity.
your talent you have many..
but the one that stands out is the one that attracted me..
your attractiveness
it caught my eye
your eyes they glow
at me.
you are dangerous,
to me.
i trust you to not break me..
i dont know if thats good or bad but you've proved to be capable of loving me.
youre not easy to read like all the others.
your personality fire and ice.
cold but warm at the same time.
youre loving but can be intimidating at times.
my heart melts when you say you love me.
its hard to believe.
someone so perfect as you..
is capable of loving someone so fractured
broken…
and torn as me.
you said you'd show me how it could be.
how love is suppose to be.
i'm hesitating on handing over my heart once again.
trusting someone with my already shattered bits of what's left.
trusting that you'll cradle it,
love it with all you've got
but, how do i possibly know that you'll protect it…
and love it..
or will you break it.
theres so many downfalls that this could go towards or it could go pleasantly but love never ends that way.
it's always heartache towards the end..
when you've done all you can possibly do with that one person then you move on and repeat it if not faster and it turns into a vicious cycle never ending until your body gives up and shuts down.
cold as a stone they say hearts are clold they are fake warm on the outside luring you to there coldness.so they can break you and tear you apart..
feed on your insides until you're all drained out then they leave you with nothing left.
love.
its a pleasurable monster that you can't get enough of.
love the drug.
that you'll trick yourself to enjoy.
love its painful..
but pleasurable.
screws with your mind.
a drug.
it feds off you until you finally die.
love its not possibly a waste of time it just makes time faster and soon you'll be drained and it will leave you to die.
love i've experienced it,
first time it was amazing..
great perhaps.
now i'm almost drained no more ink left but a pinch..
for you my dear.
don't waste it..
soon ill die.
love it's just a dream.
a nightmare perhaps.

she grew up saying.
One day mommy i’ll be famous.
one day mommy i’ll be a princess.
but,she didn't know what was coming for her ..the world
her soft brown eyes looking into that mirror for the first day of junior high..she thought oh how wonderful i look and how much she'll be liked.
her big bright heart didn't know it would be crushed in a matter of time.


she had a crush..she loved him with all her wonderful little girl heart.
she said she loved him
he said that he loved her too.
she believed him not knowing what was coming next.
his scrawny little fingers grip around her warm heart and crush it,
she looked him in the eye and said
“i thought you loved me”
he crushed her heart with one hand.
she didn't realize the world is a dangerous evil place.
so soon she became just like it
her heart wasn't so warm anymore instead cold as ice..
her soft brown eyes don't look so soft anymore there hard as a rock staring at you like she could snap your neck right off.
she said she loved him
he said it too
he believed her not knowing what was coming next
her scrawny knuckles grip around his neck
he looked her in the eye before she could break his neck and said “i thought you loved me”

thinking of you makes my day better.
you take over my thoughts
completely.
you dont know how much
i
love
you.

Why the hell do I feel alone? can you answer my questions? Im drowning in a deep black hole,how the **** is that even possible?Well in my world it is possible,cause its happening to me!You understand? What about how every year I put death on my birthday wish list?
What about how I have the pain of dying on my bucket list,
or how Id love to just cut my hole body up until I have to cut over the other cuts?
Do you understand how I feel like i'm choosing this path for myself but in reality the path chose me I just was so young so I followed it?
Do you still understand?
you can help?
Me?
YOU?
Haven't I explained enough?
NO,you can't help me!
Its impossible,
Medication just makes me feel like ****,
talking to you makes me just wanna punch you in the ******* face until you just shut  the hell up,
Ive been to hospitals they just stalk me thats it.
do you really think that helps?
you cant help me?
you'll try but you’ll miserably fail?
The monster in me will destroy you if you try to help me!
it will not only make you suffer it will **** me.
You say you can help me but, there is no way that is possible.
I'm shattered glass on the pavement no longer able to be fixed
iIm broken never to be fixed

you’re perfect.
you’re beautiful.
you’re gorgeous making my eyes melt in your presence.
you’re amazing..
you’re gorgeous did i already mention that..
i just want you to know i love you.
can i have you?
can i have your beauty to hold?
can i have your innocence?
can i have your perfection?
can i have you?
let me in..i’ll make you see what love is..
show how it can be..
show you what it’s meant to be.
let me in..
so you can see
that i love you.
let me have you..please
can i have you?
will you take me as i am?
will you love me too?
please.
let me have you!

depression.
is like drowning but, you can see everyone else breathing.
you have thoughts, maybe even dreams about going into a black hole and never returning.
you have no faith,hope,belief in yourself.
you're tired of living so, you try and attempt suicide but, then comes along your demons who want you to be alive so they can terrorize you, **** you slowly,painfully.
you will die eventually,if not survive but thats very rare for someone to recover without relapsing and running to their demons once again.
we learn how to deal with them speaking to them so they won't get lonely and decide to make you do something crazy. they take over your entire mind and body.
you don't think like you do.
you don't speak like you.
you don't make decisions like you used to.
they control you and theres no refusing to do what they want you to.
Depression is like a sickness that you cannot cure no medicine..yes there is medicine that makes you feel like ****,and makes you happy but thats truly justs drugging you.
there is no cure to depression you want to die and some how you'll find a way.
A painful way.
suicide.
now thats the worst most powerful side effect of depression.
suicide.
a wish to die.
it doesn't matter how just that you want to die over and over again to feel the pain that lets you know you're still breathing, and alive.
it drives you insane.
you try and fight through but theres no choice but to go along with it.
youre tired of looking at happy people.laugh it off like nothings happening.
tired of hearing peoples sob stories about how their cat died yesterday and not realizing you're slowly dying in front of there dim wit face.
tired of looking at things and thinking of how you'd like to do that but you just can't because you are demanded not to by the voices so instead you sit there with a wish to die in your head.
tired of listening to people give you fake *** compliments about how your so pretty,how your just so beautiful.
you know they're lying so instead you just walk away.
with the wish to die.

bleeding is the only opportunity i have,
no one is willing to save me.
so i have to save myself.
i'll bleed out.
be gone for good.
wont be miserable anymore.
i'll be free.
finally

I would like to die.
Wait…
let me rephrase that
I am dieing
slowly
painfully
in my own guilt
I’ve never really felt happiness
just sorrow and pain
and a pinch of guiltiness
I know how to swim but not as well as my demons do..
if you know what that means
you can only understand
truly if you’ve been through what i’ve been through.
I’m dying and i’m happy while  dying
I like to be in pain.
Is that insane?
yeah it is.
oh well does it look like I really care?
I hope not because I really dont give a ****.
I like dying
I know i don’t look happy but thats ok i’ll only be here for a little longer

I try to be that girl who is strong.
Who doesn't give a **** about what people think or say about her.
The girl who doesn't cry.
Who isn't afraid of being alive.
I may be strong but I
do give a **** about what other people say or think,
I cry just not in front of anyone but my closest friend the devil,
Im scared of being alive,I kinda wanna die,
im afraid of living my life.
IM INSANE.
CRAZY.
******.
A LUNATIC.
I would love to just die...go away and never come back step over the line and disappear like i'm meant to.
Why not now?
MAYBE ITS TIME.
IT is.
Goodbye.

he’s beautiful just sitting there waiting for the train to come by and hit him.Goodbye he’ll sing.
he’s beautiful even though he has a blade waiting for him underneath his mattress.
He’s beautiful even though he drowns his thoughts away with that little white and blue pill that just drags his rag doll body up into the white until he slowly painfully sinks back down again.

he’s beautiful even when he’s crying tears of blood!
I’ll always think he’s beautiful.
he’s perfect like a canvas of colors that fit perfectly together.
I love him
and always will
he’s the only one that I give a chance to throw my love away
he’s the only one that I trust enough to carry me away
He’s the only one that holds me in a daze
I love him
but,I can't have him
she has him
that lucky *** girl
but,she doesn't know how lucky she is
she cheats and then goes and tells him that she loves him and always will,
but in reality i'm the only one that means that
she is destroying my love
he’s going to die
I need to save him
but...I cant its impossible I can't fly high enough to reach him he’s in the white I'm not happy enough to do that for him,
I have to he’s my love
I can't just give up
he never did
I cant
I see that they’ve broke up
I saved him
but he doesn't love me anymore he’s after another girl.

YOUR BODY IS MY WONDER.
MY DREAM.
I'D LOVE TO JUST TELL YOU HOW MUCH YOU MEAN TO ME.
TELL YOU HOW **** AND HANDSOME YOU ARE.
TELL YOU HOW GRATEFUL I AM TO HAVE YOU BY ME.
I'D LOVE TO RUN MY HANDS UP AND DOWN YOUR BARE CHEST.
TO FEEL YOUR WONDERFULLY SOFT LIPS AGAINST MY OWN.
HUH...YOU ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY BABY.
YOU SPIN ME AROUND AND ROUND.
I'VE NEVER FALLEN SO HARD.
BABY YOU CAN START WITH ME.
'YOU SAY YOU'VE NEVER BEEN IN LOVE
HERE I AM START WITH ME
IM SURE YOURE EXCEPTIONALLY GOOD AT IT.
SHOW ME
HOW WONDERFUL YOU CAN BE

i need you.
your cold hands holding my hips.
you soft sizzling lips against my lukewarm ones.
your minty warm breath upon my neck.
how you whisper in my ear that i am your world.
sometimes i wonder is this a dream?
is this life of mine with you here real?
am i hallucinating?
god you're amazing but how did i win you over?
**** boy im falling hard.
i love you.
is this a dream?

Why am i still here?
on this planet?
in this world?
Why am i still spinning with all the others?
wHY CAN’t I ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING?
why cant i be good?
why can’t i be…
perfect,
beautiful,
unique,
funny,
awesome,
fantastic,
smART,­?
WHY AM I..
STUPID,
IMPERFECT,
UGLY,
FAT,
BORING,
ALONE,
SUICIDAL,
DEPRES­SED,
BIPOLAR,
ANXIOUS,?
WHY AM I…
DIFFERENT?
WHY HAVEN'T I DIED YET?
I WANT TOO.
ALOT.
LIKE REALLY BADLY.
I KNOW..
IM FUCKIMNG CRAZY,
A LITTLE ON THE ****** SIDE.
MAYBE A TAD BIT OF A WACK JOB.
CRAZY OR INSANE IS FINE BY ME.
I GUESS.
I HAVE SO MANY LABELS.
CALL ME WHATEVER YOU WANT.
THEY DO IT.
HE DOES IT.
SHE DOES IT.
I DO IT.
EVEN MY OWN ******* MOM DOES IT.
WHY NOT YOU.
BE SMART.
LABEL ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.
YOU SAY YOU LOVE ME..
BUT..
EVENTUALLY YOU'LL RUN AWAY TOO.
HE DID IT.
SHE DID IT.
THEY DID IT.
I DO IT.
MY MOM DOES IT.
MY LOVE DID IT.
EVERYONE DOES IT.
SO, WHY NOT YOU.
WELL, IT WILL BE A MATTER OF TIME..
BEFORE YOU GO RUNNING AWAY FROM ME.

should i tell you?
that i secretly am falling in love with
you.

As she sharpens the knife she cries tears of joy that she will soon die..
feel the joy of going down where she belongs, hell.
they thought she was getting better..they were wrong,
she got worse after he left without saying goodbye.
she has no meaning anymore.
no reason to keep living hopelessly.
shes alone..
he left her for what he wanted too..
death,
he wanted death too..
she stayed for him,
why couldn't he do the same for her?
well, he's gone now..he told her not to try he wanted her to live a long strong life.
he should of thought of that before he decided to pop those pills that night.
she won't forget him..
but she’ll forget those beautiful eyes..the ones that caught her by surprise..
she cant handle to remember how his heart would beat against her own.
she will never forget how he said he loved every **** night.
never forget those salty tears running down his perfect silicone face.
she will always love him..
but hate him for making her feel this way.
she’s doing this to see him,
to feel his coldness again.
is he still there or did he actually leave her soul too.
he did he's not there she feels warmth he's not warm he’s cold usually.
he doesn't say i love you he just stands there in shock..
she sees those salty tears once more,
he asks why she tells him that he left her and that he led her to this.
he was in her now eating at her..
telling her to stop that knife now so she could live a happy life..
he told her to scream out help!
he told her to stop the knife from hurting her anymore,
he told her to stop it
the knife was cutting deeper and deeper now.
he yelled out that he loved her.
she stopped and had finally realized what she had done.
she broke him even more.
she dropped the knife as she felt the warmth of her leave that porcelain body of hers.
he said he loved her like he had done before.
she took her last breath..
and walked away with her love..
into the darkness of hell..
she cried of joy that she had him again but he was different..this time he looked at her like she was his prey..
before he had looked so soft those brown eyes are black now..
his hands don't move the same way..they grab her like he wants to throw her away..
his face looks disgusted..
was it her?
he was evil now..what happened?
he kisses her and bites her she falls and say stop he doesn't he kills her once more.
she looks away and sees him..
the one she loves she calls out that she loved him all she sees is him on the floor the night..
that he died took his life away.
he walks away and doesn't say a thing she watches as those salty tears pour out of him for the last time.
she whispers i love you through the door.
he went on and cried that night she left him to die..
why did she leave him?
how could she?
all he wanted was to love her.
as he sharpens the knife he cries out why?
he cant help but scream her name.
he sees her as he presses harder and as it gets deeper and deeper by the second he hits the floor..
and sees her..she's crying and saying something..
she is whispering i love you..
he says it back..
as they die together..
the memories of each other creep into their minds….

YOURE A MASTERPIECE.
A PERFECT PICTURE PAINTED BY A BEAUTIFUL QUEEN.
YOU ARE DEFINITELY WORTH MY TIME.
YOU ARE DEFINITELY THE GIRL ALL THE GUYS WILL WANDER AFTER
DEFINITELY THE GIRL ALL THE GUYS WILL GO THROUGH THE TERRIBLE FOREST TO SEE THE WICKED WITCH TO HAVE YOU.
YOURE BEAUTIFUL.
YOU ARE PERFECT.
YOUR BODY IS ITS OWN PERFECTION THAT ATTRACTS ME.
OH I WANT YOU SO BADLY.
TAKE YOU IN MY ARMS AND CARRY YOU AWAY LIKE YOUR PRINCESS IN ARMOR.
BABY I WANT TO SEE YOU WALK DOWN THAT AISLE SOMEDAY.
I WILL GET ON ONE KNEE SOMEDAY.
AND BABY I HOPE YOU'LL SAY YES.
WELL HAVE A PERFECT FAMILY BECAUSE YOU'LL MAKE EVERYTHING PERFECT.
WE'LL BE TOGETHER AND IT WILL BE A FAIRY TALE.
ONE NO ONE NOT EVEN THE PERFECT COUPLE HAVE EVER LIVED
BECAUSE IT WILL BE YOU AND I.

sInce I wAs yoUng iVe lOved yoUr soul.
we'd sit under the old oak tree at my grandpa's house.
we'd talk for hours.
i'd sit and wait for you at our hide out..
we grew older
you left you said it was for the best an important reason.
i waited everyday..
under our oak tree.
at our "secret" hideout.
i soon to notice you hated me.
you made me wait for you.
i'd see you with her
but, i continued to sit under our oak tree.
our "secret" hideout got raged but don't worry if you ever come back i'll build you whole mansion.
just for you my love.
i missed you.
did you ever miss me?
ever think about how i ever much i loved you?
you left me!
i loved you.
but,
you loved me.

as i kiss your magical lips
wondering what else could they do.
as i feel your smooth hands all over my body...
on my hips.
i wonder what else could they do.
as you gave me your heart..
loving and all.
i wondered how much could it love.
one day you came home.
you came over and kissed me roughly.
you said you wanted me..
more than ever..
you said you wanted to show me the love you could give me.
i let your hands wander more to the peaks of my body and to the depths of my soul.
you let your lips kiss me everywhere.
it was special.
you said that i was perfect.
you told me i was beautiful.
then you show'd me what your heart was capapable of loving me.
with every ******
i grew to love you more.
we lay there in each others sweat and love.
the sheets spread everywhere.
i sat up and told you
i loved you.
you smiled and said
"lets take a shower"

Dead.
Gone.
Trapped.
Slowly dying
No pain.
I can't breathe
I'm suffocating
No,I can't control it
My emotions,
Thoughts,
Attempts.
I want to die and,
That's it.
That's why I attempted suicide
So I would die
But, no you have to come along ruin my whole ******* plain you stupid ****
You talk to me in my head saying
"Oh sweety no you're worth it you have your life ahead of you,you beautiful child just go to sleep you'll feel better soon"
No!!!
I will never feel better or great ever
That's impossible
I'm depressed
I want to die
But you keep interfering with my plain to die, suffocate
Just let me go drown
It will be our little secret
Okay?
Please.
I'm begging you
If you interrupt me again I'll have to **** you my dear
I love you but,dying is my first priority.
I know this will hurt you but I will accomplish this time...
Don't grieve over me you'll just waist your time.
Don't cry,you'll be better without me it's not like you really gave a **** in the first place,you just ignored me before do it now
Don't go trying to **** yourself it won't work darling
You're already dead I killed you many times before
Don't go running and telling everyone that your heart got broken because it didn't you don't have a heart and you never did
Don't say that you loved me because if you did you would of never killed me in the first place
You would of let me live but
You had to destroy me like all the others
Well it's time for me to go
Goodbye.

the shadows that darken my mind..
scare me they want to destroy me.
the shadows that dim my bedroom full of death..
they try and **** me.
im scared.
theres no one to save me.
no one who cares enough.
i wish someone would care enough..
to come and carry me away..
to save me.
i wish someone was there to call me beautiful.
because i’m not strong enough to believe that..
im not enough for this world.
im not enough for anybody..
in this world.
i wish i was enough..
i wish that someone thought i was enough..
i wish i had someone to say that they loved me.
to hold me.