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Wandisa Zwane Oct 2015
Written by

Wandisa Zwane  


April 16, 2015



INT.  APT 3101 - THE BEDROOM  

It's 02:31 am and I find myself laying silently on my bed scrolling through Instagram...Twitter...Tumblr....and Snapchat. I find myself struggling to go to sleep.  I wasn't even able to sleep for an hour or two. It's not normal as its way past my curfew. I receive a text message. I'm confused because it's
still too early for anyone to be texting me, and I know everyone nearby is fast asleep because we have school. So who could be texting me?

CUT TO: PHONE SCREEN

HER ( via text )

I'm struggling with the math homework, help ? Are you up ?

ME ( via text )

I am actually. FaceTime, call or text?

20 minutes later my phone starts ringing. She was FaceTiming me. I stare at her name for about 5 seconds trying to put myself together.

ME

Hello, Ellie

I wasn't focused on the math. I was hoping that we could forget about the math and just talk about us and the futility of life. For some stupid reason I really thought you were gonna say something cheesy like I can't get you out of my head but can we just talk until we fall in love? But no it never happened as we had an hour long conversation about math.

CUE " MATH CONVERSATION"

The futility in that conversation was cosmic to the point where I began questioning existence. But when the call finally ended I was disappointed.

CUT TO: VARSITY

It's 8am and I'm at sitting in English tired and drained. Still contemplating about the futility of life.

HER

Hey, Tyler thanks for helping me with the math homework.

ME

Uhm Ellie do you want to come over too my apartment over the weekend and chill ?

CUT TO: APARTMENT 3101

It's 12am and the apartment is really untidy. I jump out of bed and clean the entire apartment in a record time of 12 minutes and 44 seconds. I'm going crazy over here as I'm trying to remember if I gave her the correct directions. Thank god I gave her the correct directions as I see the uber pulling up in front of the apartment complex. I start sweating and shaking and I'm fearful that I'm going to have a nervous breakdown. I start cringing.
I open the door the door and it's her standing directly in front of me. I can't breathe. I'm overwhelmed by an awe of emotions. Literally - she's beautiful

ME

I mumbled - Hey Ellie it's so good to see you ( the hug was very awkward because I was nervous - it was one of those hugs where both people don't know how to hug each which makes things really awkward)

HER

Hi


ME

So glad you could make it. How was the drive ( note to self: I should stop making things awkward ) I'm so irritated at myself.

CUT TO:  APARTMENT 3101 - LIVING ROOM

She's sitting on the couch. And I'm sitting right next to her. Okay let's just say there was a 30cm gap between the both of us. I was really nervous. I found myself drinking gallons of water. I forgot to offer her anything. I was nervous to the point where I couldn't even make eye contact. I just stared at her forehead and her lips.

ME

Aren't you exhausted I mean that drive was really long ( she lived like 3 blocks away from me )

HER

Not really , I'm just really stressed about varsity and stuff I guess.

We actually start conversing with one another for 5 hours straight.We smoke about 3 cigarettes and have the most fruitful conversation ever about female energy and the power of the the heart. She's really enlightened - I thought she was really basic. We both can't go to sleep because we're actually  enjoying the presence of one another. It was cathartic and refreshing actually.

ME

Want go up to the roof and look at the universe?

HER

I'd love too.

CUT TO : COMPLEX ROOF

I brought a blanket up to the roof cause I thought it was cold. It wasn't but we just layed down underneath the open night sky and gazed into the stars. We connected with the universe/ourselves/each other. It was bliss. We ended up falling asleep on top of the roof. To my amazement we were silently wrapped around each other.

CUT TO: APARTMENT 3101 - THE KITCHEN

HER

( chuckling )
How'd you sleep

ME

( Smiling )
I slept pretty well.

ME

Do you have any plans for today?

HER

YES actually...

SEVERAL HOURS LATER: APARTMENT 3101 - KITCHEN/BEDROOM AND LIVING ROOM

The sun is setting and she still hasn't packed her bags.

ME

When are you leaving?

She said she was leaving on Sunday

HER

In 30.

ME

(I tried to not crack in front of her)
Cool.


APARTMENT 3101

About 2 weeks later she surprisingly pitches at my door with her luggage.

HER
I'm moving in with you!

I was excited at the fact that she was moving in with me but I obviously tried acting cool and composed.

CUT TO: WOLVES CAFE

As they're sitting there talking to each other about their families, Osho and meditation over a cup of tea.

ME

I was adopted.

HER

WOW - That's a huge plot twist.

She sat there speechless for about 2 minutes trying to fathom the knowledge I just presented to her.

HER

So do you ever think about your real parents?

ME

All the time - they both died in a car accident when I was 3.

HER

I'm so sorry.

ME

It's okay - I mean I know they're somewhere out there in the universe checking up on me. I speak to them when I feel lonely.

Enough about my tragic past..How are your parents?

I've never told any other soul about my parents before. She was the first person I ever told .

HER

I never knew my dad but my mom has been living with a brain tumour for like 2 years now.

ME

Wow. That's must've been so tough for you when you found out about it.

HER

It was. I went through the most vicious cycle of depression for an entire year. But I'm trying to make most of the time I have left with her.

ME

How much time do you have left to see her her and stuff ?

HER

(She starts tearing up)
3 months

CUT TO: APARTMENT 3101 - LIVING ROOM

I'm still fascinated by the fact that she's into Osho, existentialism, metaphysics and epistemology. But I also felt like our relationship had escalated so quickly. We're we rushing things? The relationship felt like it was moving at the speed of light.

ME

Do you feel like we're moving too fast ?

HER

There's no such thing, if it's meant to be it will be, whether fast or slow as long as it's true, it will last as long as you want it to.

I was momentarily tongue-tied as I was trying to digest the words she just said.

ME

......

(Still voiceless)

She still had a lot more to say after that

CUES : "rants"

But in that entire rant she said something that echoed within me.

HER

YOU KNOW I MAKE YOU HAPPY

After she said this I felt like fainting. So not only did she make me voiceless I was overwhelmed by an ocean of indescribable emotions- wow

DAYS LATER: APARTMENT 3101 - KITCHEN

I'd finally recovered from those powerful words she preached to me. So I found myself sitting in the kitchen trying to write a letter to her about how I really felt. I wasn't the best at expressing my emotions through writing but I gave it a shot.

ME

Love is the unforetold explanation for creation. Love is life. It's the merger of minds. The marriage of minds. It transcends through time, it's timeless. It takes you into a dimension filled with possibilities and opportunities. It helps you understand you are that you are not worthless. Every time I am with you I understand we are here for a reason. And every time I stare into your eyes. I realise that you are mine.  

I sealed it an envelope and put it on the kitchen counter.

LATER ON THAT DAY:

She opens the letter and starts crying.

CUT TO: THE TREEHOUSE

I introduce her to some of the guys in the treehouse. They welcomed her to the treehouse with open arms.

HER

So what do you guys do in the treehouse?

PAUL : (one of the guys part of the treehouse)

Well in the treehouse we just try to expand. We write, make music, poetry, nothing much really.

MCDONALDS DRIVE- THRU

She was to lazy to go home and cook supper she was s bit hypocritical cause she said we should stop buying junk food. So we decided to go to McDonald's. We were down to our last packet of 2 minute noodles anyway.


CUT TO: HOSPITAL

We went to visit her mother. She introduced me but there was no warmth in the hug we shared. I could feel her shrill body disintegrating. She was really cold. You could see she was dying.

HER

How've you been mom ?

MOM

She couldn't even speak properly. It was sad but when she eventually managed to responded to Ellie's question.

MOM

I'm still fighting but I don't know if I can do this for much longer.

HER

No mum you can't leave me.

MOM

I don't want to make you empty promises my child.

Who's this handsome young man Ellie?

HER

(Smiling heavily)
It's Tyler, my boyfriend

She just called me her boyfriend in front of her mom. She just put a label on our relationship. I thought it was completely platonic.

ME

Afternoon Mam. It's a pleasure to finally meet you.

I knew her name ( Stacy )  but in that moment I felt like a child in primary school - so I decided to be respectful and call her mam. I wasn't sure whether or not I should call her "Ellie's mom" or Stacy. It was just a tricky situation. So I opted for mam.

MOM

( smiling )
The pleasure is all mine Tyler.

She told me to come closer to her cause she wanted to whisper something into my ear.

MOM

Tyler I'm clearly dying as you can see. So I'm leaving with you an important task of ensuring that's my daughter remains happy at all times.Take care of her for me - please

ME

I'll take care of her - she's in safe hands.

MOM

That's the spirit Tyler. Can you give us a moment please Tyler.

HER

Just go down to the kiosk and get me a bottle of distilled water. Please.

(Tyler leaves the room)

MOM

I remember the first time you wrapped your tiny hand around my index finger , you had my soul laying on 3 cms of palm.

( Ellie interrupts )

HER

Mom don't do this , prolonging life is pure idiocy.

(she smiles as a tear rolls down her cheek )

Die so your soul can have its summer ,don't worry about my pain cause I'm really happy for you, your soul can finally taste true liberation, see my tears as autumn leaves falling from trees , I'm naked and all I can show you is the truest forms of love.

MOM

You're so beautiful because you're so true. Our connection has no equation my daughter, as I leave my body just know that my time with you transcends forever.

HER

Mother it's time for you to leave. Take a piece of my happiness, it's futile anyway and I have it in abundance but I shall be lost without you in body, I shall be found when I'm with you in soul.

MOM

Clarity comes with the last breath, as hatred and love become nothing, you are nothing and everything all at once, I'm happy for you have given it to me, tomorrow and yesterday no longer matter

(her heart stops beating and her souls goes home - heart rate monitor indicates her mom has just flat lined)

Ellie starts screaming. The nurses and doctors come sprinting in.


DOCTOR

NUURSE HAND ME THE DEFIBRILLATOR !!

HER

(in agonising pain and disbelief that her mother is dead she starts screaming)

SAVE MY MUM, PLEASE SHE CANT LEAVE ME !! YOU CANT LET HER DIE.

DOCTOR

Nurse get her out of here.

She's kicking and shoving the other nurses as she is being escorted out the room.

NURSE

Don't worry the doctors are doing all they can to save her.

Tyler comes back from the kiosk with the distilled water to find Ellie on the floor crying.

ME

What's wrong?

HER

( Her face goes pale )
She's gone ....

2 DAYS LATER: BACK AT 3101

Ellie has locked herself in my/our room. We haven't spoken to each other for like 2 weeks.

She finally decides to come out of the room.

HER

(Breaks down, again  )
It's her birthday today.

I've never seen her so broken and disfigured before. She's in pieces - distorted.

NARRATOR

Death is the door between two lives; one is left behind, one is waiting ahead. Death is the ultimate experience of this life - Osho

“Birth leads to death, death precedes birth. So if you want to see life as it really is, it is rounded on both the sides by death. Death is the beginning and death is again the end, and life is just the illusion in between. You feel alive between two deaths; the passage joining one death to another you call life. Buddha says this is not life. This life is dukkha – misery. This life is death"

HER

I WONT CRUMBLE - IM A BIG GIRL NOW. MOMMA RAISED ME TO BE A STRONG WOMAN SO IM GONNA DO THAT.

She put up this facade as if nothing ever happened. She didn't allow herself to mourn the death of her mother. She was apathetic for the next 2 weeks.

This  was a tricky phase because she either woke up angry or sad. She just rampaged through the house, didn't attend lectures - she just left a trail of destruction wherever she went. I even have the scars to prove it.

A FEW WEEKS LATER: THE DEATH ORDEAL IS FINALLY OVER

She gained about 5 kilograms in that entire period. She just kept on stuffing her face with ice cream and chocolates

HER

Tyler thanks for being there in my moment of absolute depression.

ME

I thought you were never going to be able to get yourself out of that dark abyss you were trapped in.

AT THE BEACH

The sun is setting and the couple is walking along the sand enjoying each other's company.

ME

I've got something for you Ellie

( I hope she likes it )

HER

Yes?

ME

Close your eyes

(Takes out a heart shaped pediment from back pocket  and places it around her neck )

You can open your eyes now.

HER

(Smiling)
It's lovely, thank you

ME

(Smiling back)
I'm giving you my heart but not my soul.

HER

(Blushes)

ME

(In my head)
I'm giving her my heart she better not break it.

Have you ever had that feeling before in a relationship where you think you love the other person more than they love you. To the point where you'd even get their names tattooed onto your chest. Cause that's how I feel right now.

IN THE CAR:


I'm driving Ellie to the airport. OR Tambo in fact. I'm playing some Jamie ** but I quickly change it and play my favourite song Female Energy.

CUE "FEMALE ENERGY"

ME

You excited?

HER

Yes I'm really really excited for this.

ME

I'm really gonna miss you

HER

Me too.

Ellie was completing her mothers bucket list - so she had had to travel all the way to Tibet and learn Buddhism. Nothing much really she was leaving  for 2 months.


But little did Tyler know that this was going to be the last time he sees Ellie because her plane never landed in Tibet - the plane crashed and it sunk with no no one  surviving.

STILL IN THE CAR:

Ellie hands Tyler a letter

HER

Tyler please don't open this until you get home.

ME

(Smiling)
I'll try my best.


Car parks at drop and go zone at the airport. Tyler takes out Ellie's bag from the boot.

They hug and kiss

Ellie cries.

CUT TO : "APT 3101 - LIVING ROOM "

Tyler opens the letter.

CUE "ELLIES VOICE AND ON OUR SWEATERS "


It's funny how for someone who has been so used to being lonely, the second I grip onto something that seems real, my biggest fear is losing that grip - even though for the longest time ever I've become immune to the feeling of loneliness. The same way people become dependent on other beings, people can become dependent on loneliness too - you become immune to self reassurance, your insecurities, your vulnerability and after a while it seems ideal and okay, but only because it's all you've got. You allow yourself to be consumed by this self indulgent energy making you think you don't need anybody because how else do you get by when you know that you have nobody. So when someone comes creeping in through the front door, with nothing but good intentions - you shut them out because you've lost sight of the difference in the realness of someone coming through the front door and the fakeness of someone coming through the backdoor. I struggle to fathom your presence because I didn't see you coming, through any door, you were just always there in plain sight. I don't know how to describe what I feel when I'm around you because I have never felt anything like it. All I know is that it leaves me in a place
An incomplete screenplay.
Q Jan 2014
I had a collar once
Of black leather and sky blue fur
And it fit me snugly
It was all I could ask for.

When my thoughts rampaged
As they do very second of everyday
I'd wrap it round my neck
And the noise would fade.

They called me a freak.
They looked at me in disgust, I was shamed
Because they don't understand
The need to be tamed.

Whether round my neck
Or around my wrists and ankles
Without a tether, I fret
Thus, for that collar, I am thankful.

I once felt guilt
Worse than any other pain
It weighed me down
As though it waterlogged my brain.

And all I wished
Was to atone
For a whip
To sing to my bones.

"Why invite pain?
God, she's disgusting?
She's ******* insane!"

The words said to me.

But how could they know
How much I wanted to cry?
How much I wanted discipline
To ease the guilt in my mind?

I once heard a scream
And it scampered down my spine
Like it was a living, sentient being
Infiltrating my mind.

And I'm sure I'd be a pariah
If I ever told anyone
I wanted to cause that scream
To make it sound like painful salvation.

I once cried
I hurt myself as comfort
And the feeling of that pain
Was so very sweet and so very short

And they'd call me a fool
Yet I still crave pain
And they'd think of me badly
For what I can't contain.

See, I'm far from vanilla
I'm far from innocence
Because all life gave me
Was cold and cimmerian.

There's a word for what I do
A lovely acronym
And it's so far from vanilla
Most describe it as a sin.
Hal Loyd Denton Sep 2012
I need to finish the story for convenience I have the original Aftermath to be read first on the bottom
What was not stated in Aftermath was my concern for my writing you can’t write with two legs
Screaming when I got to the hospital my kidneys were of a concern eight alieve three times a day about
Thirty aspirins something like Tylenol didn’t count them no relief my mistake I would bang my ****** leg
Against the wood of the desk that would make it crazy for a few seconds so I finally had to stop for over
Two months well the devil won it seemed when I talked to my cousin I was at eighteen thousand reads a
Little while let me break in here for a second I know I’m talking about numbers it isn’t ego if I come in
Contact with any of you in any setting and I pass you by with just a glance I am your sworn Godless
Enemy I have just joined the cruelest damnable assassins Hell has ever released on the world I know
What awaits the lost even the Apostle Paul worked fervently because he knew the end cost of God’s
Holy severity can I do less I look but I take in all manner caring thoughts but without fail I am led to that
Future now no one even gives the last day a thought I will put this in as an excerpt this is the dream I
Had when I was seventeen or it starts this way your life began in the great head waters at Eden they will
End at the mouth of eternity. I was given a view into the celestial I was just a teenager while a sleep this
Dream came I looked into the heavens and saw two great wheels made of stars the hands of God started
To pull the wheels down as I continued I knew what was occurring God was stopping time. The wheels
Stopped then God turned to the seamless darkness grasped it and started to lift as he did it tore away
Reveling the bright true world of the spirit that was before hidden this was alarming since I hadn’t made
My peace with him Not long after this I was seventeen working at the refinery I just walked out of the
Boiler room into the section that was known as the flathead when a voice said time is finished all life and
Its concerns flowed out leaving me with the greatest sadness other men standing by laid down their
Tools and started milling about mindlessly on this wise in some manner this will happen all over the
World the great enterprises so important to man and society will halt government rule and authority
Abolished in an instant majesty and power will take the reins the river previously known will be
Empowered its first charge make the deserts bloom as a rose…

And I take the liberty to insert I am a person of deep feelings to make the case I wrote two pieces for
Roberta Merrifield’s birthday sorry your flowers are late then I forgot your card this was talking about
Her friends as flowers each of them need to go to their door and imagine nine hundred people standing
There reading about their lives that are filled with grace and beauty and earthen treasures that are in
Vessels of clay but to see them truly you will be speechless so I return to the numbers so it was
Eighteen thousand a little later when I couldn’t stand the pain any longer I called my retired preacher
Uncle and our pastor brother Russell I explained to them about being whipped and my writing had to be
Shut down it was thirty five thousand reads then so keys were stilled my lifeline to needy souls was at
A deadly stillness so then two months later I wrote fourteen pieces bringing the total to four hundred
And fourteen pieces and then Gods love demands the his heart be represented this is the one I am
Pleased about the most I wrote a piece called the mirrored pool over four hundred souls read this I’m
Sorry this is too important to excerpt it in you are not obligated to read I leave that to your discretion

Mirrored Pool
Wonder for all the hurts
First I knelt just to see my reflection then the depths started to reveal first the flowing thoughts were
Restrained and then a bubbling seemed to dislodge from greater depths hard truths churned with
Violent twisting but the motion made it impossible to turn away there were great large white clouds
From depths then even above the pool they rose fourteen stories high the sensation was you were
Standing outside clear air intoxicating views the pulse of many were throbbing in your ears their
Thoughts and dreams were known and their sorrows were weights that pulled you from the heights
It was a colossal game of tag and you were it first reaction fear then the appearance of bundled gifts
Broke down the fear it was promise in different sizes that met the required needs it was like a divine
Warehouse had just made a delivery there were cards with names and writing gave clarification tears
And smiles intermingled then the outer knowing postulated the difficulty the puzzle an enormous
Streaming that was now congested and it was beginning a vortex all was understood now human thought
With doubts was pulling the answer into this destructive hole where was one to find the lever to stop
This action that would disallow was the answer to touch the water bring the finger to my lips possibly
A blazing thought would occur that would strike the mind no all that brought was words that had the
Letters jumbled they made no sense unless there is a special book that is alive in it the letters and words
Are already set but they cover every act in the human condition the broken can pour over the pages
You won’t find thorns to repel your efforts there are thorns but they will speak and assuage your hurts
At the most basic and needed levels the points of your hurts will begin to dissolve from your eyes to
Your mind this inward rush and power will dislodge even spears driven deep by enemies carried for
Years you searched in vain over sad and lonely paths and days now you journey is at an end thorns of
Suffering for another produces profound power and mercy go in peace beloved one another bears your
Burden now maybe words cut you at depths you can’t even identify what if there is an antidote in a
Book you pick it up with trembling hands your body tingles from the knowledge that this is ancient texts
It will have a revival of appreciation in this world of texting but with gentle fingers and eyes that glow
With respect as you see the wisdom and the love cannot be denied you leave the world you know and
With total abandonment you swim in this sea of words until the your tears spill on this rich world of
Words those cruel barbed words that pierced tender skin and have bled internally all of these years
Begin to dissolve with stories and accounts of betrayals then the swells love and mercy you read about
Restoration not always found after apologies are given but the teaching of forgiveness strikes a cord
You have been made free from your prison the tangles of life are great as a great black cloud it hangs
Over head many are its troubles this isn’t mild but the disruptive made to strike and pierce deep the
Hidden that steals the morning blessing while other feast your hunger and unrest only enlarges a
Tormenting unquenchable fire a slow burn this is a forest being burned at the thermal level the hidden
Roots a slow process destructive but not so visible agony torture I have seen men crawl in war or fire
Fighting that where all else is lost you will know greater thrills than any other living soul with the
Desperate and those heavy burdened unable to stand a word will flow it puts out fires and gives
The luxurious buoyancy heaviness changed to joy the bouncy laughter every outward blast attack
The enemy launches is within its pages they are repelled overwhelmed by love you suffer unduly
If you don’t hold this fortress this informative book of stratagems that have made everyone a victor
Who has ever found themselves at their wits end no place on earth has a contingency plan though it
Will make the greatest claims all is just empty air when life as it too often does ***** the very air of life
Out we practically are unconscious but this help this rescue is activated by one name it’s not just a book
But the word is a person what a pool you will find what a reflection will engage you beyond your hope
To imagine just say Jesus all will be total peace your heart will know no more sorrow peace will surpass
Sorrow love will disallow the specter that was once a constant it will disappear it will return to the
Darkness from which it came stand in this newness totally free abide by still waters as the good
Sheppard stands by bless you

So the success against the evil one stands like this while he body slammed me the number of
Souls touched has risen to sixty three thousand five thousand while I was in Braidwood so I
Thank the father whose love and concern never wavers by Christmas I am hopeful I will reach
A hundred thousand if I make heaven I don’t want to see you at judgment and hear you say the
Words of that old song he knew I was lost but said nothing to me!!!!!!!!!!

The Aftermath
Please read this to see in my limited way I want to show you your true worth and value and you will see
what the devil never can get.
This is what I would stand and testify in church but what I have to say is lengthy here it can be read or
Not I would first say this to love souls is agonizing it comes with pain and great tears I went to the site
Where they started the church years ago on my Grandma Brown’s front porch as I set there I pleaded
With God to help me make a difference I turned and looked down the old street that held so many
Memories of course Tommy and Elise and Glena are the only ones that remain but I looked farther
That’s when God moved wave after wave of hard rocking sobs that lasted for thirty minutes or more
And after getting back home some will say this is foolish and I’m the first to know we can’t take the devil
On by ourselves but overcome with emotion I turned from the computer and spoke to evil its self that I
Was declaring total war for souls this is what it has cost me so far at the time I had one open wound on
My shin above the ankle two appeared directly above the first one then one to the side and then I knew
What was to come because I have sleep apnea I sleep in a recliner I knew the sores would ring my leg
And they did you can’t lay your leg out on the ledge with open wounds with nerve endings screaming
Then it jumped to my other leg so that was the first volley when I write I get lost time doesn’t exist many
A time daylight would surprise me coming through the window then the onslaught increases I go to the
Hospital I got there in early afternoon they got me in the room at ten thirty but just before a lady comes
In and takes my blood pressure it is close to perfect and then she comes back in five minutes and tells
Me take these three blood pressure pills trusting her I take them well about twelve or one they come
Into and take my blood pressure they had driven it down to seventy over thirty and plus my first
Experience with morphine I was sick and strangely loopy I wasn’t in the bed I couldn’t lay my legs
Down and no one else was in the room only one bed I did set at the end of the bed with it all the way up
In the back I put my head on it and slept comfortably one funny they have it posted call don’t fall I didn’t
Do this on purpose but when I was pulling the drawer out of the stand it came out with a wonderful
Crash Steve the male nurse made record time from down the hall at the nurse station he lunges in the
Room it wasn’t humpty dumpty just the drawer I couldn’t tell if he was relived or ticked off then it was
Their shot back over the net intravenous antibiotics five days needed a doctor from disease control to
Release me then there version of cons scarring kids with tales about prison to keep them messing with
Drugs scared straight now was scared healthy I walked out the same as I walked in I got a bill for thirty
Thousand well at least I didn’t have a bad heart then it was eleven weeks at the wound center this was
Where I met as I lovingly call them my healing angels they finally got all twelve open sores to close then
for the rest of the problem it was six weeks three times a week forty five miles to and from hundred
Degree heat every day you have to pay a hundred and seventy dollars yourself for the compress wrap
Material then you turn around a pay for compress socks that insurance doesn’t cover least the inside is
Pure silver so missed the Olympics but I got silver in fact every six months I will get silver again this is
Kind apropos I asked the compress wrap therapist where Lymph edema comes from and I will spare you
The pictures but the infection and lymph edema pictures even grossed me out but interestingly the
Therapist said an ancient king in Israel had the disease hello devil no cure just mange it from now on
This is the biggest cut of all someone else has to put them on I have always been called a free spirit
Try to take off on your own and what say hey stranger would you put these on my leg it’s like trying to
Put a baby squirrel skin on a full grown body the therapist does speeches internationally with a doctor
From India she asked permission after taking pictures to show the audience I wouldn’t want to see that
Show give the devil his due he is good at being bad I crossed swords with him he rampaged all over me
I didn’t include everything I have gone through and that doesn’t include my poor wife but I am profane
Corrupt undone should I speak to you of such great things as eternal verities matters that involve where
You will spend eternity there is the cleansing of the word the cleansing of changing my corrupt nature to
His by the spirit but know this no one will ever approach or in any way defile the very ones that as the
Finest gems will be placed in his Holy diadem this takes the cleansing of suffering and brokenness with
The heart Broken for souls and the most necessary of all this nature that is too much like the evil one
That’s what he doesn’t get the more he beats up on a person he is doing God’s work of purifying the
Most elemental evil that must be scourged if I touch you it has to be purist intentions of holy deign
We are awash in the lowest dregs dare I say quick sand only holiness can enable us to traverse this
Killing place of a dark and ever turning evil that compounds itself the devil will never lose the majority
On The Broad way that leads to destruction but there are the blessed few that stop and say oh no this is
Not for Me I was his child and I will be again thanks for the load you made me bear serving you devil now Only Love will be the weight I feel it comes by a great price of God Himself and His people

I need to finish the story for convenience I have the original Aftermath to be read first on the bottom
What was not stated in Aftermath was my concern for my writing you can’t write with two legs
Screaming when I got to the hospital my kidneys were of a concern eight alieve three times a day about
Thirty aspirins something like Tylenol didn’t count them no relief my mistake I would bang my ****** leg
Against the wood of the desk that would make it crazy for a few seconds so I finally had to stop for over
Two months well the devil won it seemed when I talked to my cousin I was at eighteen thousand reads a
Little while let me break in here for a second I know I’m talking about numbers it isn’t ego if I come in
Contact with any of you in any setting and I pass you by with just a glance I am your sworn Godless
Enemy I have just joined the cruelest damnable assassins Hell has ever released on the world I know
What awaits the lost even the Apostle Paul worked fervently because he knew the end cost of God’s
Holy severity can I do less I look but I take in all manner caring thoughts but without fail I am led to that
Future now no one even gives the last day a thought I will put this in as an excerpt this is the dream I
Had when I was seventeen or it starts this way your life began in the great head waters at Eden they will
End at the mouth of eternity. I was given a view into the celestial I was just a teenager while a sleep this
Dream came I looked into the heavens and saw two great wheels made of stars the hands of God started
To pull the wheels down as I continued I knew what was occurring God w
Sophia Apr 2018
there was a sparkle in her eyes
I saw it
I saw it
no one else paid her any attention
and only I noticed the apple cores of her hands
unfulfilled
starving
hysterical
barren
barred

so she resorted to magic
the crazy stuff of existence
like the wheat she stashed in her sandbag heart
and when it found her not
despair shook the earth
around her sorrowful body
permeating disillusion
confusion
immersion in nothingness nothingness nothing

lonely lonely
and bottle caps launched from her fingernails
from the spiraling stems of madness that rampaged through her bulging pulse
with piercing shards of nothingness nothingness nothing
splitting her glowing veins

and sweetening her ever-kind
clueless
knowledgeable
brain brain brain

and where was the world?
Hal Loyd Denton Aug 2012
The Aftermath

Please read this to see in my limited way I want to show you your true worth and value and you will see
What the devil never can get.

This is what I would stand and testify in church but what I have to say is lengthy here it can be read or
Not I would first say this to love souls is agonizing it comes with pain and great tears I went to the site
Where they started the church years ago on my Grandma Brown’s front porch as I set there I pleaded
With God to help me make a difference I turned and looked down the old street that held so many
Memories of course Tommy and Elise and Glena are the only ones that remain but I looked farther
That’s when God moved wave after wave of hard rocking sobs that lasted for thirty minutes or more
And after getting back home some will say this is foolish and I’m the first to know we can’t take the devil
On by ourselves but overcome with emotion I turned from the computer and spoke to evil its self that I
Was declaring total war for souls this is what it has cost me so far at the time I had one open wound on
My shin above the ankle two appeared directly above the first one then one to the side and then I knew
What was to come because I have sleep apnea I sleep in a recliner I knew the sores would ring my leg
And they did you can’t lay your leg out on the ledge with open wounds with nerve endings screaming
Then it jumped to my other leg so that was the first volley when I write I get lost time doesn’t exist many
A time daylight would surprise me coming through the window then the onslaught increases I go to the
Hospital I got there in early afternoon they got me in the room at ten thirty but just before a lady comes
In and takes my blood pressure it is close to perfect and then she comes back in five minutes and tells
Me take these three blood pressure pills trusting her I take them well about twelve or one they come
Into and take my blood pressure they had driven it down to seventy over thirty and plus my first
Experience with morphine I was sick and strangely loopy I wasn’t in the bed I couldn’t lay my legs
Down and no one else was in the room only one bed I did set at the end of the bed with it all the way up
In the back I put my head on it and slept comfortably one funny they have it posted call don’t fall I didn’t
Do this on purpose but when I was pulling the drawer out of the stand it came out with a wonderful
Crash Steve the male nurse made record time from down the hall at the nurse station he lunges in the
Room it wasn’t humpty dumpty just the drawer I couldn’t tell if he was relived or ticked off then it was
Their shot back over the net intravenous antibiotics five days needed a doctor from disease control to
Release me then there version of cons scarring kids with tales about prison to keep them messing with
Drugs scared straight now was scared healthy I walked out the same as I walked in I got a bill for thirty
Thousand well at least I didn’t have a bad heart then it was eleven weeks at the wound center this was
Where I met as I lovingly call them my healing angels they finally got all twelve open sores to close then
for the rest of the problem it was six weeks three times a week forty five miles to and from hundred
Degree heat every day you have to pay a hundred and seventy dollars yourself for the compress wrap
Material then you turn around a pay for compress socks that insurance doesn’t cover least the inside is
Pure silver so missed the Olympics but I got silver in fact every six months I will get silver again this is
Kind apropos I asked the compress wrap therapist where Lymph edema comes from and I will spare you
The pictures but the infection and lymph edema pictures even grossed me out but interestingly the
Therapist said an ancient king in Israel had the disease hello devil no cure just mange it from now on
This is the biggest cut of all someone else has to put them on I have always been called a free spirit
Try to take off on your own and what say hey stranger would you put these on my leg it’s like trying to
Put a baby squirrel skin on a full grown body the therapist does speeches internationally with a doctor
From India she asked permission after taking pictures to show the audience I wouldn’t want to see that
Show give the devil his due he is good at being bad I crossed swords with him he rampaged all over me
I didn’t include everything I have gone through and that doesn’t include my poor wife but I am profane
Corrupt undone should I speak to you of such great things as eternal verities matters that involve where
You will spend eternity there is the cleansing of the word the cleansing of changing my corrupt nature to
His by the spirit but know this no one will ever approach or in any way defile the very ones that as the
Finest gems will be placed in his Holy diadem this takes the cleansing of suffering and brokenness with
The heart Broken for souls and the most necessary of all this nature that is too much like the evil one
That’s what he doesn’t get the more he beats up on a person he is doing God’s work of purifying the
Most elemental evil that must be scourged if I touch you it has to be purist intentions of holy deign
We are awash in the lowest dregs dare I say quick sand only holiness can enable us to traverse this
Killing place of a dark and ever turning evil that compounds itself the devil will never lose the majority
On The Broad way that leads to destruction but there are the blessed few that stop and say oh no this is
Not for Me I was his child and I will be again thanks for the load you made me bear serving you devil
now Only Love will be the weight I feel it comes by a great price of God Himself and His people
Alan McClure Jan 2013
A countless headed monster
rampaged through the village yesterday
smashing everything in its wake
befouling the water
and devouring my whole family
in its slathering jaws.

It really was no consolation
that it brushed its teeth afterwards.
In one bright, rainless, warm, non-sombre and cloudless morning of April 2014,
Skirmishes began at ten in the morning, among the roaming street children
As if they were only playing hopscotch among themselves, and their mates,
It was an unfolding in the dust filled non tarmacked streets of Lodwar town,
Town located in the savannah desert belt of north western Kenya,
A non local police man who was on patrol shot dead a rioting local,
A hungry local had attempted to ****** a shot-gun from the policeman,
He shot him twice in the head, scattering whitish brain tissues all over,
He shot another local sympathizer of the riot in the leg, in the heel,
The remaining riff-raff of rioting locals took off on their heels, like rats,
Once picturized in the word-smithing power of James Herbert,
The hoards of local rioters, most of them motorbike riders, rushed back,
To their places of abode, known as Manyatta,
                                                  or poor hamlets, more sorriest than ghettos,
They pulled out their fellow manyatta dwellers
For military reinforcement
They came back in throngs
All armed with rusty guns
Swearing to **** all
By the brute guns,
All the non locals
Not from their tribe.


They rampaged a whole town
Mercilessly looting and plundering
Each and every shop, business vessel, all outlets
Of the non-locals, all the migrants; black and white,
Chinese and Arabs, Indians and Somalis, Just but to mention,
They looted while singing tribal war songs, shooting all the non locals
Identified by differences in outfits; especially loincloths, Ekijolong, etc
They shot non local women, children and vandalized their trade wares
Those with guns holding the police station hostage, those without guns looting shops
Some tried ******, but their uncircumcised ***** proved a snag in this satanic venture
With a sardonic remorse they stopped the terror of **** against womenfolk of non natives
Women folk of non local ethnicity, but still not safe as shooting followed without ruth,
Puncturing the *******, ****** and bladders, spilling and splashing blood on each gunshot,
Human wailing, crying, hysterical running, farting, falling, and brute of the gun’s cannon
Gripped the town in a flower of curling dark smoke from burning tires,
Gunmen walked from door to door in a feat of amok anger,
Asking names of each person on their way
To decipher out the tribe or the clan
Lest they mayhem a native son
Instead of the non- local
Which they are bound to ****
By dutifully releasing
Deathly bullets
Into the head
Of emoit.
Jamie King Jan 2015
Standing still
Crushed rampaged
  metals collide the face
  splashed with guts of the
      masses Massacras being
            routines in all routes the
                   scenes are blinding
                        as light flashes
                     before the eyes
                  like angry skies
                in  darker nights

           The day is reborn
      the face wiped with
  cloths of sorrow black
bags already gone but
  not forgotten, pardoned
     only when the bones have
           cracked and the body
           can no longer stand the
             pain, with holes deep
             enough to be filled
                    by the rain.
So there I was walking on the road and I'm thinking what does it feel like for people to step on you and walk all over you at every turn in your life.. and so I wrote this poem
Apachi Ram Fatal Jun 2017
loot the ***** boot the rich
Hang the snitch emancipate the
itch madness a bit saintly
Pitch a fast curve kick sadness
to the curb of broken dreams
It seems a thing of the past blast
passed the failure your always
will be searching for that someone that is me you irritate my peace of mind when will you finally leave me alone the thirst for success
Irresistible i cant reach without you in the drivers seat a deadbeat\

rhino walking softly carries a big
gun to compute the poverty disburse the novelty mute the donkey
Shoot up the ****** groove\
superb lock stock two smoking barrels manup positions dapple improve\
dry too flimsy ripple status quo fluid stain wet into a puddle strain\
stable ground disintegrate cry squabble hone grin refute scrabble tunnel\
cruising off a shotgun bang what up with that thang show her off hang *****\
sting know how ripe ***** in demand bite inflicting raw election dangle TLC\
exposed suckle foreplay bare the doom shielded knuckle brass boots ******* HooT\
BooM on blast mettle to the pedal sass passing windows fast exhaust throttle\
fastlane straddle last shrine wine tire popping the wealthy snoot channelside\
stealthy snoop crank dogg sly filthy in hind charlie brown restrain grand sighs\
define the grime be kind foresee the crime rewind lakhaim frame spine spinning\
wheel ordeals repeal sick figures concealed pinning children against frontal lobes\

memory versus\

skulls lost salam to lucifer in a frantic relay replay demonic delay foiling shalom\
band alaykoum in purse fulfilling evil curse droopy eyed fools drooling pearl pool\
diluting verses sheet smarts versions saluting sheer farce shuffling back\ rank pipe crack\
tears smear contract around virus rooms chasing bail resisting a ***** toned\
smears contract around virus rooms chasing bail resisting a ***** toned\
frown talking to walls of jail houses crowned end dead thread landfill clowns\
bumping heads bunk bed trash courthouse playground twisting ***** fits\
battered butter mutter peace cross the street forgetting to put up and fight\
shiest with height heist barren on the other side green lyres setting fear steep lower\
reflection revel mirrors deflection inflicting Ghostface highness pace rhymeless chase Killah\

stoke shady slim phone in remaining senses detain impurity capitulating dexterity fuse\
recluse stan granting badass roundhouse kicks rudimental trick chant chatterbox vamp\
underworld stick centerfold haunting Rancid activate superlative octave erupt glee\
sharply whiplash ash out the masses entrance serendipity multiply sentimental divide\
invincible prime knowledge footprint stepping benign modicum rootline stem enticing\ cognizant fledge camaraderie hack feasibility snare clear spear stupes stare look at\
that rearview it's you ******* a pornstar in the backseat rampaged **** dripping slit swept\

weeping tantric rendition ******* loose rocking out sweep companions check and replace\
**** tighten up crews shock and strut byob bend righty tighty string along aim gift dames\
chauffeur fate slate teams honor razzle the green fire dazzle gardens retire kinder\
inspire **** arthur passion swords struck within pyramid empires cured she'll always\
                          love you truly madly deeply combined nocturnal eternal WH navel\
brighten up rooms choose floos to lose
Once upon a time, there was a hideous creature.
He lived alone in the mountains. Oh so alone.
Through the night, he would wander into the valley.
None went in the woods at night. Not even the brave.
The valley was known as the midnight grave.
The monster would rampage at night so angrily.
Yet many find it strange, that even he has a home.
But anger and fury are not the only things that feature.

As with many a story, there is a legend to this plot.
At the home of the beast, there is a quiet, still man.
A man that is so kind and soft; he silences the beast.
They share a home, but are never seen together.
The man is as gentle as a baby bird’s feather,
He is the kind of man who would rather be the least
So that others may achieve all that they can.
However, legends often have details that are forgot.

There came to the nearby town a festive time,
Filled with laughter, smiles, and celebrations.
Many visitors came to see the sights and sounds
Of the festivities of the 27th of February,
A celebration of all those who are free.
This is a place and time where love truly abounds,
A place where love is expressed in plays and demonstrations.
But the people leave the area as soon as the clock hits nine.

The ravenous beast comes down from his mountain,
In search for objects to suffer his anger and rage.
Many a lost soul has had to suffer,
Because their timing had been unappealing.
Yet the strangest happening happened this evening.
The beast was in full rampage, getting rougher and rougher.
He rampaged on and on broke through every trap and cage,
Yet he never went past this one fountain.

The morning came and the town was broken,
The festival was officially over, just like the year before.
Yet amongst the rubble, a little girl began to cry.
She had lost her favourite story book in all the commotion.
Irreconcilable, she could not hide her emotion.
Her parents, frantic, moved away for fear that they may die.
For tears are said to fuel the beast to cause others to suffer more.
The pain of others was said to be the beast’s token.

In the lair of the beast walks the man of peace.
The man had found something new this day,
He found a book that he had never seen.
So in the quiet, he sat down to read,
But as he read he realized a need.
So something started that had never been.
The man read some more, and unwittingly began to pray.
This quiet man realized then that he was a masterpiece.

The book that was lost got a man found.
The book that was found never got lost.
The man never departed from that storybook,
But since that day the beast never returned.
The quiet man was the beast that yearned
For the pain of others, and so did look
For ways to make others get lost.
But the cure of the beast was a man to be found.

You see the quiet man carried his rage in kindness,
But he was equal to the beast that rampaged endlessly.
The only salvation for either man was found in pages.
Whether you act or you don’t, your heart will bear witness,
If you are truly and honestly selfless.
It doesn’t matter if you complete all the stages,
Salvation is wrought in the heart for true victory.
So acting alone without the heart is but utter madness.

Whether you do or don’t matters little,
You cannot walk down the middle.
You either live for God in your heart and deeds
Or you follow a path that only to sadness leads.
As he opened one eye a new existence awaited
it was cold and he was semi naked!
A salty smell filled his sensitive nostrils
wearily he sat up.
Blood ran down his arm from a savage ****
clothes strewn about like trash!

No memory of how he ended up in this spot
a watery sun began to shine.
Standing it was though he had a hangover
how his head throbbed.
Gathering his clothes and putting them on
he heard a clock on seven ****!

That splitting headache rampaged his thoughts
trying desperately to remember.
He was sure it was a celebration with mates
must have had too much *****.
Finding it hard to even remember his address
how had he got into this mess?

His parents thankfully had already left for work
weak had a job climbing the stairs.
Couldn't even recognize himself in the mirror
more zombie than human!
Still early so dizzy collapsed on the bed
soon his duvet had turned red!

In a deep slumber awful images started to form
of wolves ripping his flesh!
The next thing he knew his mum was shouting
shocked at his appearance!
Evening when he was rushed to hospital so ill
that ambulance siren shrill!

A month passed now resting healed in the garden
darkness was ascending.
A full moon shone that night he was twitchy
as his hearing became acute.
Starting to sweat his entire body began to ache
the wolf inside began to awake!

The Foureyed Poet.
Waking up semi naked in the early morning the young man just could not remember what had happened the night before!
The Foureyed Poet.
J Aug 2013
Like you, words are delicate but abrasive.
They leave trails of kisses along your torso, but also they have a rampaged hunger for rattling your ribcage.
They have the tendency to manipulate wallflowered minds such as my own.
Words will fill you up with sunlight, letting you have a mere taste of sheer ecstasy, but will take that away returning you to the hollow vessel you once were.
Words are like past lovers who keep coming back to tease.
kenye Aug 2013
Are you aware, or are you tuned out?
     Behind your technology
     Do you feel invincible?

The singularity isn't near enough to save you

Intuition leaks,
     fight or flight gets rampaged

Sensory overload,
     the main power grid shuts down

Man vs. animal instinct
     in a creation throw-down

*We sent out the distress call via status update...
Rangzeb Hussain Feb 2011
The night winds sing,
the chorus rings through
the dead hour of the valley.
Hear it, the music of the wolf’s pain.

Against the backdrop of the new moon,
high on an icy blue rocky ridge
with the pine trees stabbing the black sky,
there shivers the weeping wolf.

This day he has lost
two precious things...


Hunters came bearing muskets,
bayonets and torches.
They rampaged through the wood
shooting everything that moved.
The air hung heavy with the stink
of the musket shot.

The wolf’s mate,
a beauty amongst beauties,
had been suckling her pup
when a hunter’s sabre silently sliced
through her fur
and cleaved her silky shoulder.

Death silenced her
and snatched away her pup.
PK Wakefield May 2011
Unlike wind. tall and walking leaf's
curling in bushy locks of. the very,
naked and servile, moon she's
street bounding rills of semisweet
chatter. the togetherness too much
,in,of comely arms a fawn thing, in
the forest of metal's. just leapt vanishing
smoke, into, the carnival of neon
large singing signs. post day well,
in gloom unanimously, slunk with
girl's skinny. they brushed fair and wane
as light's face creeping furtive


                                                ,        "weLL­
                                                         i was said
                                                       in those walls
                                                     sterile and seething
                                                   manic lewd gracefully
                                                  stum­bling,
                                                          ­             i
                                                               ­        was mounted with
                                                            ­           paint of sinning luscious
                                                        ­               lips who carefully
                                                       ­                rampaged, blithe node
                                                            ­           ,a noggin, mine.
                                                          cavort­ing straight narrow
                                                        un­bent sharp green eye's slip.
                                                   s
                                                  l
           ­                                      i
                                                p
             ­                                   r
                            ­                     i
                                                  g
           ­                                        h
                                                     t
                                                       i
                                                        n
     ­                                                    t
                                                         o
                                                        M
     ­                                                   y
            ­                                       f
                                              a
               ­                         s
                                  t
  ­                      D
                            r
           ­                     i
                                      n
  ­                                           k
                                                Down my throat" (ouch!)
It was a bright midday in June,

When he sought refuge from what plagued him.

He took his camera for a walk,

To get his mind off of Kim.



It had been three whole weeks,

Since that fatal car ride.

A screech of tires, shattered glass.

She’s no longer at his side.



Down the street he walked,

To the forest so he could see,

The birds, the leaves, the dirt, the sky,

The trees, the trees, the trees.



And though running he was,

From the feeling that befell,

He was angered when he found,

They were in the forest as well.



He picked up speed and into the trees,

He plunged ever further.

He ran blindly, faster and faster,

To escape the thoughts of her.



He burst into a clearing,

And saw a red tower, reaching to the sky.

He slumped down, his back to the brick,

And quickly started to cry.



“Why did she have to go?”

Into a ball, he curled.

He looked into his camera, pressed ‘record,’

To say good-bye to this world.



He wiped the tears from his eyes.

He rose up to his knees,

When in the camera’s bright screen,

He saw something in the trees.



He turned quickly to see who,

It was who stood there.

He was struck, dumbfounded when he saw,

Something out of a nightmare.



Silent, unmoving. Wrapped in black.

It stood tall and *****.

It charaded as a man, though man, it was not.

Pale face, black hat, collar high-necked.



He stared in horror, tried to run,

His feet would not move.

The Shadow outstretched it’s long arms,

And the feelings began to soothe.



“I know what you feel, I know why you cry.”

“I know what rampaged in your heart.”

“Take my hand, join me into the dark.”

“From her memory, you shall part.”



“Who are you,” he yelled back.

“Why do you speak to me?”

“Go on your way, dark stranger.”

“I want to be alone, can’t you see?”



The shadow hissed, a poisoned laugh.

“On my way? We’ve only just started.”

His anger sparked, but he was happy it replaced,

The feeling that had departed.



He approached the Shadow quickly.

A blow, he planned to land.

As he stood next to the towering figure,

He swung forward his hand.



As he knocked off the Shadow’s hat,

Through his mind, images of Kim did race.

He stared into the Shadow’s visage,

But it was just his own cold, dead, pale face.
Shauna Nov 2014
Let's take a trip down memory lane,*
Where the people were everything but sane
I open the unmarked cardboard box
Full of torn photographs
Torn, because my mother
Refused to remember
The memories
Of my "father"
Who, full of rage
Broke out of his cage
And rampaged around
The quaint house
Of my past
Until one day
He disappeared
For good

Another photograph
Was left untouched
And full of dust
And underneath that thick layer
Mom and Dad were smiling
And then I thought
What happened?

But then
I thought
What if they weren't really happy? What if it were all one big lie?*
And that's when I knew
That I never
Ever
Wanted to take a trip down memory lane
Again
Because
It was too painful
To contemplate
And analyze
Why
And
How
Things turned out
The way they did
It was a circle, an eclectic mix
Forthright, amid downcast eyes
Courage hard to handle
To let go, a mission impossible
Others champing at the bit to bite
The air between us.

She morphed into her words as
We all fell silent, while drowning us
In her vitriolic pursuit to be heard
Met by the challenging bull that
Rampaged the space we all couldn't fill.

..........................................................­...............

Well, some might say
At least she had courage
Wore an honest face
That matched her inner expression
What you see is what you get...
Perhaps
Kate Bartel Oct 2014
the first
was a backseat freestyle
half-Catholic, half-alcoholic
rampaged my underage
with whiskey and wallet,
a secret
only until

the second
alexander the great
undefeated in battle
he knew my worth
but not its weight

the third
disguised as hymn
soaked our nest in sin
led me in a prayer every night
baptizing my body with his white

the fourth
****** me like corpse
gold cross beat collarbone
and hands like Caesar
overthrew me
into

the fifth
traced the contours
of my wrists
he was a righteous king
until
“this will feel good”
robbed me of
my womanhood

the sixth
looked at me
like I was the sky over Judah
vowed to be loyal
crowned me royal
then stormed my capital
at dusk

the seventh
rough and
in Hebrew tongue
“this is the first time
i’ve done this sober
in awhile”

the eighth
graced me
with misogynist faith
made me kneel
until my knees
were just bruises
on his floorboards

the ninth
warrior’d his way
into my walls
a Trojan prince
who could’ve cared
less about the outcome
of a broken one

these are
the nine good men
who i let hero-storm
my temple with their chivalry
inside-out my worth
into bible verse
crucified by ignorant white

i actually believed by some light or reason
that a man might cleanse me of my demons

i tried to love each of them
like i’d never known broken
tried to marry my wounds
into Magdalene

moaning a beggar’s cry:
treat me like new, brand new!
untouched, like virtue
us, we, come together are purity!

but they had all been in search of their sin
from the beginning
nine worthies
who made the rules
only so they could know where to
break them

all religious

all deemed / worthy
praised / King
self-proclaimed / God
This poem is inspired by The Nine Worthies, a group of history's "heroes" who were thought to encompass all characteristics of the perfectly chivalrous warrior. They were made up of three good Jews, three good Christians, and three good Pagans. The commentary I make in this poem on religion and its assumed state of purity is putting a spin on the values portrayed by these men to criticize the men I've had experiences with in my own life.
david o'neill Apr 2018
Imagine the days
Spent playing endless charades,
With a ****** of crows
Holding court on telephone poles.
Flocking like the masses
To attend the evening classes,
Of a mystical educator
Renowned for his knowledge of nature.

They listen as he speaks
Of the glorious mountain peaks,
The rivers with their bends
And how nature always tends,
To invoke the imagination
Of even the most civilised of nations.

Cultivated in sin
Our society begins,
To crumble before our eyes
And with technology on the rise
Will I be left here to despise,
The remnants of my peoples glazed and absent eyes?

Technology has stolen,
Rampaged, ripped through, broken.
Conversations we once had
Now left to the distant past.
Why don't you ask me about nature,
the cosmos or the sea?
Why does everything you talk about
Emerge from MTV?
I don't care who's got the fattest ***
Or the biggest **** you see?
All I care for is mother nature
And spirituality!
Jamie King May 2018
Standing still
Crushed rampaged
  metals collide the face
  splashed with guts of the
      masses Massacras being
            routines in all routes the
                   scenes are blinding
                        as light flashes
                     before the eyes
                  like angry skies
                in  darker nights

           The day is reborn
      the face wiped with
  cloths of sorrow black
bags already gone but
  not forgotten, pardoned
     only when the bones have
           cracked and the body
           can no longer stand the
             pain, with holes deep
             enough to be filled
                    by the rain.
So there I was walking on the road and I'm thinking what does it feel like for people to step on you and walk all over you at every turn in your life.. and so I wrote this poem
Olivia Kent May 2013
On the Outside Looking In

How sad it is when brave heart meets mad assassin!
On day lit street,
How cruel it is,
When daylight spreads her stunning wrap as shroud,
Young fellow,
Tragic life lost!
Appalling,
Barbaric *******,
Sin incarnate!
Let hell have no mercy on their vile souls,
Look inside,
Analyse,
Fire fed incubus,
Increment,
Pure disgust,
Realise,
Mass mess,
Damage done,
Community relations busted,
As two rampaged alone,
Dancing with devils,
Horrendous!
Religion whirls in chaos,
Paradise lost,
Solution zero, not grounded,
Tragic,
Agendas confused,
Misunderstood,
Hellish cost!
Crucify others with tongue alone,
Here I sit and ask that all this evil ends,
I know that it's impossible to have a world of friends!

By ladylivvi1

© 2013 ladylivvi1 (All rights reserved)
Xenna Dec 2016
The wind blows lightly,
Brushing against her face.
Letting her hair run rampaged.  
It was raining,
No one on the streets.
Waiting for her bus.
With tears in her eyes.
The rain masking them.
So much on her mind
and no longer willing to tell.

She was living out her
Daily routine.
C B Heath Apr 2013
after the act
there is a quiet lull

a kind of retirement
for the senses.

when the flesh
rampaged until dull
and dead and broken
from passion
            is a new canvas
            again, then

that assault
the dawn raid

artillery refusing to believe
in boundaries, saying
a path is better
a path is better

and this is a fresh battle
14th piece for NaPoWriMo
Destiny C Oct 2018
You found my hills-
ignoring the pleas and appeals.

You rampaged your way into the hidden valley,
while I sat their dissociating - assuming death was my finale.

You scourged through my dips and curves,
as though I should be flattered you came back for thirds.

Imprinting your unwelcomed touch on my mind forever,
the violation of my body will be forgotten never.
am no student of art
but paint with the strokes of my heart
at the beat of its drum
the blood on my arm
dripping from it's fist,
in a dance at a feast,

a bonfire, a hollow moon,
a reaper's scythe, a large spoon,
digging with my nails,
to blur my trails,
that when the sainthood comes,
to bleed my palms,

I stand justified
my ego satisfied
in a pouring rain
that eases my pain
when my soul rampaged in vengeance
and seeks not the house of repentance
Apachi Ram Fatal Jun 2017
loot the rich stomp gratuity saintly disprove\
carry a big gun dispute the poverty mute superb\
lock stock two smoking barrels back it up\
shotguns bang what up with that thang she\
wants to know how it hangs ***** in demand\
hooded soldiers bareknuckles shoot the doom brass knuckle ******* boots HooT\
BooM on blast mettle to the pedal gas passing windows fast exhaust throttle\
fastlane straddle past shrine tired popping the wealthy snoot channelside\
stealthy snoop crank dogg sly filthy in hind charlie brown restrain grand sighs\
define the grime be kind foresee the crime rewind lakhaim frame spine spinning\
wheel ordeals repeal sick figures concealed pinning children against frontal lobes\

memory versus\

skulls lost salam to lucifer in a frantic relay replay demonic delay foiling shalom\
band alaykoum in purse fulfilling evil curse droopy eyed fools drooling pearl\
pools diluting verses sheer smarts versions saluting grave farce shuffling back\ crack pipe\
smears contract around virus rooms chasing bail resisting a ***** toned\
frown talking to walls of jail houses crowned end dead thread landfill clowns\
bumping heads bunk bed trash courthouse playground twisting ***** fits\
battered butter mutter peace cross the street forgetting to put up and fight\
shiest with height heist barren on the other side green lyres setting fear steep lower\
reflection revel mirrors deflection inflicting Ghostface highness pace rhymeless chase Killah\

stoke shady slim phone in remaining senses detain impurity capitulating dexterity fuse\
recluse stan granting badass roundhouse kicks rudimental trick chant chatterbox vamp\
underworld stick centerfold haunting Rancid activate superlative octave erupt glee\
sharply whiplash ash out the masses entrance serendipity multiply sentimental divide\
invincible prime knowledge footprint stepping benign modicum rootline stem enticing\ cognizant fledge camaraderie hack feasibility snare clear spear stupes stare look at\
that rearview it's you ******* a pornstar in the backseat rampaged **** dripping slit swept\

weeping tantric rendition ******* loose rocking out sweep companions check and replace\
**** tighten up crews shock and strut byob bend righty tighty string along aim gift dames\
chauffeur fate slate teams honor razzle the green fire dazzle gardens retire kinder\
inspire **** arthur passion swords struck within pyramid empires cured she'll always\
                          love you truly madly deeply combined nocturnal eternal WH navel\
Americas Most Wanted
C B Heath Jun 2013
da
Having died, you have grown
inside my heart for years.
It happened when I did
not care what happened -
in my subbacultcha
adolescence. I was
numb and you numbed
me further. You were not
much like a father anyway,
but I was shocked to
never mourn you.

I know now that it has been
a gradual mourning. I blindly
rampaged into my twenties
before even thinking of you.
And when I did, I did and
I did and I did and you were
there, suddenly, nightly.
It is worse this way,
in many ways – my griefs
are stupid, impossible
questions like: 'Why
Daddy can't you have known
me as a grown man?' I am
so much the son of yours
now. No longer a boy.

Having died, you have
grown – oh nevermind.
Heidi Kalloo May 2015
I had a dream and
You were chasing me,
I was scared.
I locked the door and
Hid in the closet
You drove the car into the house.
I snuck downstairs while
You rampaged around
Breaking down doors and smashing glass
Looking for me.
I ran down the back stairs when
You were walking up the front
I unlocked the back door and ran
Into the woods behind the house.
I heard you screaming
Mindless with rage calling me
***** calling me ****
I hid behind trees in the dark
There was no one there to save me
And I was scared.
In the end you found me,
And I don't remember
What happened after that.
I woke up sweating and
Climbed in bed with Mommy
You were somewhere else
And I had already forgiven you.
In lots of ways you will always be angry,
Especially in my dreams
Where you chase and I run.
In lots of ways the past is
Always present,
And the time that has passed
Means nothing.
But you are not so angry anymore,
And when you were angry I loved you still
Even though I was scared.
Both sides of the Arbela militia remained frosty, failing to tear the wrath of the throne from the depths of the charter and from the expropriation of the votive temple, in view of the strength of leaders who were reinserted and rewritten from the plaster of Parnassus, where the beatifices Mortals are seen competing without having references or additions in the washer that predominated by chance referring to athletes and gladiators who were not, but today they could be spiked in the crushing Syntagamatarchos table, captaining two units all with their abdomen semi open, re liquidating again the entrails by the Ghosts of Shiraz, who came from Roknabad (also known as Aub-e Rokní), from an underground channel that carried water from the spring to the city from a mountain located ten kilometers northeast of Profitis Ilias, from where until then they were commanded, with dispatches of their designs before a voluntary prodigy that emancipates a perplexed Meltem i that he was haphazardly swirling in the funerary fields, but descriptive of returning to the fields their souls, which abstained after ephemeris towards a knowledge resigned to abide by it, and to get rid of transcendental limitations commanded by his blowing, and not his body that was clouded before the conspicuous epistemological reason flashed and relaxed when comforting them for having to calibrate their bones when they returned to Mosul. The Colosso pedestals were breaking when it intimidated everyone to flee to their homes, in this way it calmed them down from the quicksilver of the world that was no longer their typical dwelling, from a dwelling of transit to a story that deals with the flys that are they hover, pretending to be the same, banishing themselves from the pain that rises up the cervical spine and that dismisses the ridiculous voices of Aeschylus with their acting choruses that they seemed dilapidated in cries impossible to personify. The ******* brave pieces of deployment began to drain from the secondary positions of the penultimate physicalities of suffering that one felt without being affected, rather it manifested itself in the contents of an essential muscular container, of the subsistence of the cosmos installed in what does not think nor decide on its retraction. Vernarth and Alexander the Great knelt in front of the larnax of the torments of mercy, like ***** language that lashes out rhetoric in rebellions of thousands of hoplites who expiated themselves from their hands, empty spiked race contained in the perjury of Zeus, enrolled in apocryphal images in tombs of those who were going to be faced with pseudo refractory that was recluses of the fleshless breath, but anarchic when trying to return to their places of origin of warlike Tikun.

The traits of annihilation were shed from buried reanimates that became slime in the reverie of a mythological God who never accompanied them and invited them from a cohabiting sun, which was only the fantasy of irresistible permutations. It should be noted that the subplot was in intangible interfaces that would never be stitched together as an annexed story, but the words of parapsychology were captained by themselves more than the sub plotline that transcended the apostrophe of death, and the Pronoia of the Peri Kousmos. The doors of Patmia were finally released and speculative vines re-flowered were Lotos and Astragalus, as courtesies of Operandi and impairment that replaced the ****** elderberry, with chalks that made the winter raging when Persephone rampaged what was merely monthly erratic of those who exiled her. The senses of Patmos were the property of his Institution, which was what it is and is not, for a holistic consequence of fast ideology but of minimal intuition, which lay in multiple reasons for tissues that were filled with crop fields, animals in Magna prairies that agreed to serve the man who loved him, in which the causes were two meters before the limen that sent her off the cliff in other causes of confusion, in a real creation of zoological Hellenic neuroscience, where all forms of mythology were made of submithology, always at the side of man but this time redeemed from the origin and cause, they only persevere to offend a certain space of ignorance where the like all prevaricated by large amounts subordinate to their lineage, in the kingdom of paradises from which only animals protect the doors that only Cerberos and Cherubim open, scrutinizing food for them and making use of them.

Patmos was remade of all the waterfalls that completed the rigors of the precept, and not the chaos that subordinates cognition to make night day or day night, pouring specimens that were and will be ignored but extremely useful for the preservation of the body of the unsupported objective and sumptuous, but of a systemic nature that does and sustains it. The Souls of Helenikká and Trouvere graced all the inhabitants towards a comprehensive evolution of the ***** of dreams, giving it the fruits of conservation where the lords of the future will have to bow to the laborious principle of the Mashiach, conciliating the arrest of the stars and not of what is reactive of an invasive action. Thus ended this subplot rhetoric of intuitive formality and metaphysical channeling character, leading them through plumbing that led from what was coming out from the Raedus Codex, from the wind tunnel, and what was coming in from here identical to its elevation towards the direct apotheosis of the Megaron that was splendid in four composition buttresses with more than two drops of laudanum, which will be insignificant ***** to save the cosmos from falls of vitality in the conclusion of Vernarth.

Saint John the Evangelist after several sleeping episodes of his spiritual experience, reappears in the sucker of modality and intentions that the drops of laudanum manifested to fill the pain of Vernarth's tragedy, and those that are manifested to him that they became resurrected entelechies of component solutions speculative, that were reborn from certain internal devastations, and that returned vague automata to the Achaemenids that emerged from the depths of this professorial subplot, to bring them with the simplicity of lexicons that were loving realities that would lie behind the veils of illusion, transgressing properties of a totalizing daphnomancy. Due to his parliament, Áullos Kósmos eliminated himself braided from the road when he expresses fatigue and regret, calming the reasons in the flight from himself. He starts from demoralization and hidden impotence of the Hoplite that would not come out of himself, because it is a frenzy of consternation that makes him start from the unshakable grief of his compassion, without reaching the surface of the ethical plane.
Battle of Patmia Part VI
Tati Oct 2018
I used to be pure
Innocent
My golden halo rested above my head,
representing the genuine love I had for everyone
I was to forgive and adore everything and everybody in my path, no matter what wrongs they had done.
God sent me into the world and told me to be good.
For years I was nothing but the definition of grace and poise
I would be beaten and abused, but my love would not stop.
Until one day I had enough.
I grabbed my halo and threw it to the ground
I tore off my wings and embroidered lace nightgown
And I rampaged.
Flames engulfed me as I attacked my abusers
Violently, I hit. I stabbed. I shred.
When the flames died down I saw the damage I caused.
Pain.
The guilt hit me.
I saw all of my abusers lay on the floor
Covered in blood
Crying
Begging for me to stop
The way I did when they hurt me
Physically. Emotionally. In all ways.
I turned to see God, awaiting my punishment.
He looked at me with such heartbreak and dismay.
“How could you do such a thing? I told you to come her to spread my word and to  love others. Not cause pain.”
My lips quivered.
“I’m sorry God.”
Jesus Johnson Dec 2016
It all started with a spark.
Oh look at how beautiful she is! This girl standing before me as she is interested in me.
I am baffled as I never thought I could ever catch the eye of someone this beautiful.
This spark lit a bonfire into my soul, making me feel things I had never felt before, how brilliant it was.
This spark lit a flame of loving emotions as she became one of the most important people in my life.
This spark lit a burning need for her and her care, she made me feel like I could do anything, no matter what people told me.
She was what I needed, what I wanted, everything I had hoped for.  
We connected beautifully she was everything I was looking for and gave all the right answers, did all the right things.
But I lost control of the fire.
I watched it burn as it fed the anger in my soul that I didn't even know was there.
The fire continued to grow and I was swept into it.
I became the fire.
I rampaged around lighting everything aflame, but I went too far.
She was standing right there.
I ripped through her, I breached her trust, I didn't love her enough.
I broke her as this fire went right threw her.
I saw the light fade away from her eyes.
The fire that I was engulfed in distinguished in an instant.
I saw her collapse to the floor in pain as she screamed in agony.
I shattered her heart but it didn't come out in pieces.
I burnt her whole world down.
Now there are only ashes.
Ashes as I didn't give her everything I had to love her.
Ashes as I allowed my anger to push her away.
Ashes as I wasn't there for her.
And it's too late.
Now I just watch as the ashes pour out.
It will never happen again.
Jackie Mead Apr 2018
I introduced myself to you a short while back
I’m the man with fangs for teeth, who lies in a coffin by day and roams the earth by night

I’ve seen some sights in my 500 years, most of them not pretty
The strangest of them occurred this evening, whilst roaming in the City

I was looking for some sweet blood to save me from dying
Sweet, warm blood, just my type, a sign of a human being ready and ripe

Ripe for the picking, for my tea, a nip of the neck to set me free
First a nip, then I ****, until the blood is drained, the human runs out of luck but me well I’m Mr Lucky

Well I guess my luck is wearing thin, or I found someone of my match
A blonde beauty oh how I much desired, threw herself right at me and I almost fell in the fire

We were sat lounging in a bar in the Cavern, it is of course our local Tavern
Her eyes found me across the room, I lost all my senses and started to swoon

She batted her eyelids and lashes and called me by my name
I tried to speak but couldn’t fathom a reply, all I could do was open my mouth and sigh

She wiggled her finger at me beckoning me to her side
I blushed and went over to see what she wanted, I had no idea I was so vain, and at this moment in time feeling a little insane.

She told me she loved me and wanted to wed, then for me to take her home and share with her, my bed
I was flattered, and loving thoughts rampaged through my head

I got down on one knee, like the gent that I am, and asked her to wed me tonight
She said that she would and showed great delight, then kissed me on my lips

A little nip she gave before her lips left mine, it didn’t matter, it tasted divine, like a good full bodied red wine

We married in haste, eager to get home to bed, all impure thoughts running through my head

When we got to my room it became suddenly clear, it wasn’t my bed she wanted to share
She had designs on my blood within, she was going to **** me dry, make me pay for all my sins

It was suddenly clear that she wasn’t very nice, the words from her mouth dripped full of lies, the blood that ran through her veins as cold as ice

I would not suffer or give in, I needed 500 more years to carry on with my sins
I hatched a plan to save my skin, I needed to be quick, my skin is thin

Thin skin and a pale face, blood red eyes and fangs for teeth
My thoughts turned to hate, and I started to seethe


In the Kitchen I opened a bottle of full bodied red, called her to share it with me by the open fire
I declared my love for her and told her she was my heart’s desire

She was bewitched and flattered, mesmerised by with my words
I looked her in the eyes and bent forward for a kiss,
I missed and fell forward, stumbling and pushing the little minx,
She let out a cry and tried to steady herself on the kitchen sink

Alas, it was not to be, suddenly she fell into the fire, my love, my only desire
Turned to black and faded away, maybe she’ll reform and come back another day
This time with love and warmth in her eyes, then we could give it a go, see if it is possible for Two Vampire to own a soul.

For now, I am free to continue to roam, in the City I call home.
A follow-on to A Vampires Life, if you've read that one, I hope you enjoy this one too
Haddy T Jobe Aug 2018
Sixteen miles of walking along a road..
Rampaged by rampant thunder..
Think not lowly of the traveler then..
If he might fall or blunder..
For broken bones shant stop this man..
Nor will the anticipation..
Because he feels that torture or torment..
Is just part of education..
Devon Leonel Jan 2019
The tempest did not last long
Though while it rampaged it was terrible to behold
Stinging sheets of rain falling nearly sideways
On the fierce breath of the raging wind
A gale force ripping up everything in its path
Sharp stabs of lightning, the only illumination
Across a dark and battered land
And then
The storm blew out
The world dropped away
All that remained
Stillness
Silence
Quiet
Spinning through empty space
Trying to reorient
Moments of feeling grounded again
Like feet finding passing asteroids
Stability for a time
Too soon, the rock floating away in its orbit
Leaving only space
And darkness
Straining to find the next moment of solid footing
Eyes that acclimate to the dark
Learning to navigate the emptiness
Between those moments of steadiness
Then, without warning, a blinding flash
Remnant of the maelstrom
A bolt of lightning searing through space
The afterimage, glimpses of times gone by
Visions of moments that never came to be
Shadows of a future once dreamed of
Eventually fading away to blackness once more
No way to see what lies ahead
Or what direction “ahead” even is
Just drifting
But
Still
Trying
To move forward
Through empty space
The storm isn't raging but the cold emptiness is almost worse
violet brownlee Oct 2018
I was told not to move
Or my father will disprove
I must improve or remove
The reason why I need to prove

The cold was frigid
making every statued human rigid
The was block was human grided
As if the town was knitted

The fire raged
But I was caged
The men from the houses rampaged
But there I was, unpaged
guess which chapter of "to **** a mockingbird" this was inspired by.
Brian Oct 2018
I watched a magpie pondering the mysteries of life,
He perched upon a sagging line, taking in the sights.
Sixteen wheelers rampaged through the space beneath his feet,
He cared as much as streetlights do when flies upon them meet.

Other winged adventurers regarded him with care,
Their courtesies were kept in check, exchanges very rare.
Not only those that scaled the skies but those that climbed the poles,
Surveyed the magpie’s presence as the blacksmith eyes the coals.

The lion’s share of creatures with effort can be tamed,
But the chalky, charcoal wanderer, all efforts are in vain.
He will not go directed, he does not fear the hand,
He struts along a footpath as the mustang pounds the land.

Some find beauty in the birds that surf the wind like sails,
Eagles, Hawks and Falcons, but me, I think they fail.
They fail the test of nerve, they can be called to heel,
The bold and dauntless black and white was never known to kneel.

There is no shame in walking to the strict beat of the drum,
The cause won’t cross the finish line lacking numbers in the scrum,
And beauty most would testify is in colours and design,
The structure of perfection to few God did assign.

But I would argue differently and of this I am sure,
Beauty is a simple thing common, bland and pure.
Beware of gazing blindly when the wizard shakes his hand,
While your attention was absorbed you missed the truly grand.

What’s truly great and wonderful, as the saying goes of old,
Won’t be found on pedestals, all that glitters is not gold.
The worlds delights will not be found in the neighbourhood of fame,
It hides within the masses, to most it looks the same.
But train your eye to look beyond where most will fall their gaze,
And you will find the special kind that truly do amaze.
Carla Aug 2020
"In memory of the six million Jews killed by the Nazis during the war 1939-1945
Therenstadt    Stutthof    Klooga    Treblinka    Buche­nwald  
  Ponay Babi- Yar    Transnistria    Westerbork    Ravensbruck    
Bełżec    Chełmno  ­  Lwów - Janowska    
Bergen - Belsen    Drancy    Majdanek    Dachau    
Auschwitz - Oświęcim    Mauthausen    Sobibór
May the world never again witness such inhumanity of man against man"

Man is an excuse for a race. We put up signs of slaughter, memories of massacre, graves of gore, dreams of destruction, history of holocaust.
Six million.
A number so vast, we are unable to comprehend.
Six million:
slaughtered for no sin
rampaged for religion
killed for their kin
This is what we have come to. The ending of life.
s     i     x
m i l l i o n
l  i  v  e  s

May the world never again witness such inhumanity of man against man.
Broccoli Nov 2017
it was pink then yellow then purple,
then it darkened and slowly turned black.

it wasnt the sharp pain that killed her,
but the numbing chill that crept up her poor scrawny neck.

it wasnt knives and swords that stabbed her heart,
but splinters of loneliness that were carefully woven around it.

it wasnt that she didnt seek help at all,
but there was so much, she didn’t know where to begin.

it wasnt the map that made her lost,
but it was the rain and the wind and the places she didnt belong.

it wasnt the people round her that drove her up the wall,
but the cockroaches of love that rampaged on the floor.

it was pink, then yellow then purple,
and suddenly it lightened and it didn’t feel so bad, after all.
Things always feels the worst in that moment of sadness and depression, but when we look back, we would realise that the once gruesome monsters have become nothing but small edgy stones.

— The End —