I collided into you with eyes closed and palms raw

And to this day,
I still feel the aftershocks of our skin touching

Meeting you wasn't like some storm;
No stillness before the lashing of rain and wind

Meeting you was sudden
It was violent
Meeting you was loud

And now I'm just left with these small aftershocks;
Just a taste of what it was like to touch your skin with mine

Collide with me again

I've never craved loudness
But I'm restless and needy

There is a peacefulness
A stillness
With death

That I never thought was there

Witnessing your last breath was the most
Earth shattering thing

The loudest moment of silence

GRIEF is not peaceful
It is pain and hurt and blackness

But that transition of planes;

Mimicking eagle's wings
The ocean's gentle tides

There was a peacefulness with your death

And God,

Do I miss you

Dad

I adore you most during the quietest times of the day
When everything seems so still

I long for you most during the quietest times of the day
Your hands against my aching skin

Heal me
So we can enjoy the stillness together
Our own little world of silence

You beautiful,
Beautiful
Woman you --
I'm in awe of you,
You lovely woman

I love you like jazz notes
All over the place and messy

I love you slow
Like a burning ember holding onto firewood

I love you fiercely
I love you now
And then
And always

In secret
In whisper