"longings" poems
After years of aimless wanderings
Leaving behind the cities of midnight revels
And the fevered journey in metro rails,
I am back at the land of my people.
Wherever I went,
Under which ever roof I slept,
I had carried my land,
As a jewel in a casket
And ensured it rested safe
Ever under my pillow
As I moved with aliens
Unable to merge with their cultural mores,
I saw my land glimmer in darkness
Like a dew drop on a moon blanched leaf
When I sweated in the blistering sands
A patch of green landscape, like an oasis
Wafted me in a cool embrace
Then dreams poured in like star light
And I wandered in the meadows of my youthful love
My heart struggling to forget old longings
And memories lashing upon me like tidal waves
Pursued by that inalienable shadow
Suddenly being born in flesh and blood
I hastened to the streets of my youth
With hopes galore and plans vivid
But alas! There is none to recognize me
Oh! I am a stranger here
An unwelcome stranger among total strangers
Now I wonder which is truly my land?
The one left behind or the one just landed in?
Oscillating between these two worlds,
My fractured identity looms large
With worms of memories wriggling in my flesh
And a myth suddenly dying in my brain
Jun 7, 2018
Jun 7, 2018 at 10:37 AM UTC
let's be wildflowers,
let our souls be scattered by the wind.
let us grow, wild and free,
tall and brave,
in the places that we dream,
in the places where our longings
are filled.
let us grow between the cracks
of brokenness,
and we will make everything beautiful.
Oct 30, 2016
Oct 30, 2016 at 9:56 PM UTC
they say shes waiting for me
beautifully
they say that shes there
with loves tender embrace
with loves intimate kiss
softly waiting for the mad rush of my day to end
waiting for me to come home to her arms
but for now i'm just a tinker
down by the ***** river
lost in the back roads and shadows
dragging behind a fat sack of yesterdays
building better dreams for all the pretty people
filled with longings and desires
but ill make it home to her someday
where she lay in the peaceful moonlight
where she waits for me beautifully
filled with such tender desire
with loves intimate kiss
ill be there in her arms
home at long last
never to leave again
she is all iv dreamt of
she is waiting....
Nov 7, 2014
Nov 7, 2014 at 3:40 PM UTC
I glimpse your eyes staring at the shadows in my soul
Seeking to calm the wildly rushing storm
Keeping my heart out of control
Unable to keep
The beat
Pulsating whole
I stare into eyes seeking to calm the storms
To make my heart their own
Leaving chambers once cold now warm
My heart begins to pulsate
To the beat
Of a song, it's always known
Buried longings softly rush, to be finally freed
From this heart out of control
Once a half now pulsates complete
Your eyes chase shadows
Calming storms,
My heart
Returns to whole
Oct 16, 2010
Oct 16, 2010 at 8:46 PM UTC
I cannot recall you gentle
yet through your heavy love
I have become
an image of your once delicate flesh
split with deceitful longings.
When strangers come and compliment me
your aged spirit takes a bow
jingling with pride
but once you hid that secret
in the center of furies
hanging me
with deep ******* and wiry hair
with your own split flesh
and long suffering eyes
buried in myths of little worth.
But I have peeled away your anger
down to the core of love
and look mother
I Am
a dark temple where your true spirit rises
beautiful
and tough as chestnut
stanchion against your nightmare of weakness
and if eyes conceal
a squadron of conflicting rebellions
I learned from you
to define myself
through your denials
audre lorde
Apr 28, 2018
Apr 28, 2018 at 8:33 PM UTC
Often I think of the beautiful town
That is seated by the sea;
Often in thought go up and down
The pleasant streets of that dear old town,
And my youth comes back to me.
And a verse of a Lapland song
Is haunting my memory still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
I can see the shadowy lines of its trees,
And catch, in sudden gleams,
The sheen of the far-surrounding seas,
And islands that were the Hesperides
Of all my boyish dreams.
And the burden of that old song,
It murmurs and whispers still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
I remember the black wharves and the ships,
And the sea-tides tossing free;
And Spanish sailors with bearded lips,
And the beauty and mystery of the ships,
And the magic of the sea.
And the voice of that wayward song
Is singing and saying still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
I remember the bulwarks by the shore,
And the fort upon the hill;
The sunrise gun, with its hollow roar,
The drum-beat repeated o’er and o’er,
And the bugle wild and shrill.
And the music of that old song
Throbs in my memory still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
I remember the sea-fight far away,
How it thundered o’er the tide!
And the dead captains, as they lay
In their graves, o’erlooking the tranquil bay
Where they in battle died.
And the sound of that mournful song
Goes through me with a thrill:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
I can see the breezy dome of groves,
The shadows of Deering’s Woods;
And the friendships old and the early loves
Come back with a Sabbath sound, as of doves
In quiet neighborhoods.
And the verse of that sweet old song,
It flutters and murmurs still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
I remember the gleams and glooms that dart
Across the school-boy’s brain;
The song and the silence in the heart,
That in part are prophecies, and in part
Are longings wild and vain.
And the voice of that fitful song
Sings on, and is never still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
There are things of which I may not speak;
There are dreams that cannot die;
There are thoughts that make the strong heart weak,
And bring a pallor into the cheek,
And a mist before the eye.
And the words of that fatal song
Come over me like a chill:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
Strange to me now are the forms I meet
When I visit the dear old town;
But the native air is pure and sweet,
And the trees that o’ershadow each well-known street,
As they balance up and down,
Are singing the beautiful song,
Are sighing and whispering still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
And Deering’s Woods are fresh and fair,
And with joy that is almost pain
My heart goes back to wander there,
And among the dreams of the days that were,
I find my lost youth again.
And the strange and beautiful song,
The groves are repeating it still:
“A boy’s will is the wind’s will,
And the thoughts of youth are long, long thoughts.”
6.8k
On a misty city morning
still resolved to early rising
I came upon a heap of corpses
They were child sacrifices
made to satisfy the fancy
of Christian capitalist and pagan
and a jolly old fat man
who lives at the North Pole
They might have been
growing tall
in a field or on a hill
drinking sunlight
breathing love songs
in answer to caress of wind
But the silent pines
didn't seem to mind
their broken bodies one last gift
filling my chest with fragrant air
and longings
for fields and hills
on a misty city morning
Jan 17, 2019
Jan 17, 2019 at 10:17 AM UTC
Your apodyopsis
Is enticing
And
Every single part of me
Is entangling
In this gaol
Of carnal insecurities
And fervent longings.
S.N
May 24, 2014
May 24, 2014 at 6:27 AM UTC
You woke me in the thin dawn.
Like a riot of rain in a bleached dry summer.
small green shreds of shrub sprang from my heart
as tumbling birdsong might litter the long pale sky.
your voice came drifting through the shallow line
And I let the sound seep like a soft assault on my senses.
I hear the words and picture your lips
Folding around the consonants like a dance.
I hear your breath carry the words and taste the phrases
That linger on your tongue as if to speak them in a kiss
These words that spin this cloth of gold in whispered utterings
This silken tease with a wild sprinkle of kisses and anatomy.
And would my words soften your eye and entice your body
With fevered adventures seeking to be sated with a touch?
Could you taste the blessings erupting from my tongue?
Would you ache inside far beneath the longings of the flesh?
It seems that every cell is sighing a simpering listless want
to be captured by the haunting breath of a lover’s call.
Jul 2, 2014
Jul 2, 2014 at 5:34 AM UTC
It's deep night, damp and sticky with the
residue of southern heat which refuses to
totally dissipate this far into the night.
The night is thick with the voices of insects
and sleepers sweating atop their sheets,
committing sins in their vivid imaginings.
Dreaming, I'm standing by the wide river
wishing I could fly with the breeze through
the trees, the soft, warm, cradling breeze
that comes up from the Mississippi River.
It stirs the boughs of cypress and oak trees
and arouses a wind chime's music somewhere
down the dimly-lit street, while scattering
a newspaper like huge leaves; a wind that smells
of magnolia and dogwood blossoms and
river mud. A full moon casts long shadows
which melt into even darker, yet benign
shadows. The night has compiled its secrets,
mysteries, transgressions; surely that is the
charm of night - it frees the mind to settle not
on what seemed important during the day,
but on the longings kept locked away, hidden
from the disclosing light, struggling to break
free and take wing with this night wind.
--
Sep 14, 2011
Sep 14, 2011 at 1:34 PM UTC
This year:
(for those with brave hearts)
I hope you find the strength to make your choices and fight for the life that you want.
I hope you look up from all your hard work and realize how much you've grown.
I hope you find yourself saved sometimes.
I hope you find time to get lost, in your head, in the wilderness, to explore forests, and gaze into rivers.
I hope you find your best self looking back at you. I hope you know you're always growing.
I hope you feel challenged.
I hope you never stop believing in the view from the top of the mountain.
I hope you get there. I hope you find it was worth it.
(for the softhearted)
I hope you find more time to laugh.
With your friends, at yourself, or at the world for ever thinking it could hurt you.
I hope you can take the pain and say "thank you."
i hope you realize it has only made you all the more good, all the more beautiful.
I hope you start looking less at the mirror, start believing more in who you are in other people's eyes, what you know you are in your heart.
I hope life gets sweeter, hope you wake up with your head in the clouds, your soul flying.
I hope you finally find what you're looking for.
I hope you find yourself smiling.
(for those with big hearts)
i hope you realize how important you are, how you make people feel appreciated and loved.
i hope you realize that the world wouldn't be the same if you weren't trying so hard to make it a better place.
i hope the world tucks you into bed, proud of its little soldier.
i hope you appreciate yourself for your efforts.
i hope you never get tired of being a champion of the things people say no longer exist - so much kindness, goodness, love, peace.
i hope that you find fulfillment in the little things because sometimes, that's all we get.
little things like knowing you made someone smile, or that the people you love are doing fine, doing better.
i hope you realize that's all you need.
i hope your heart is proud of itself.
i hope the love that burns in you always keeps you warm.
(for the fainthearted)
I hope you realize there's so much more to your life than you thought there was.
I hope you find moments that make your breath catch, a million things to marvel at.
I hope life surprises you. I hope you surprise yourself.
I hope you find your horizons expanding, and see that it's not as bad as you thought.
I hope your dreams take you places; I hope you travel paths that you never knew existed, but where you feel you belong.
I hope you discover your longings, what your heart would sing for, what you didn't know you wanted all along.
I hope you get up and chase it.
Dec 28, 2016
Dec 28, 2016 at 10:28 AM UTC
Tempestuous longings from behind the screen of life’s moving picture
You stare back at me, in a glimmering, shimmering afterthought
Laid low by foregoing passion
In a moment’s torrid glimpse from our hollow reflections
Fragrant evenings during seasons of filming
Solemnly captured and revised then experienced
The all encompassing struggle with context and setting
Abides a steely night, in the rustle of autumn branches
Requiem for an unremitting beloved!
Sung in the valley between piercing peaks of sorrow
She floats through the scene as distinct aura and vague essence
An embrace from the trail of vapors and misspent gestures
All emanating from a glass of cider beneath nostrils
Gracefully, you embank on the wind of time’s shadow
And nudge my cheek with impetus and vigor
Lashing out at my skin in ambivalent revelry
As if my follicles were vacuous caverns
Catching the callous moments which flutter the ***** of hillside tents
The unearthly gusts of banality extinguish the projector’s gleam
While nature embodies your beauty furthermore
Toward the end of the pathway
And the credits of the film
And the allegro of the score
And the solitude of eternity
And the rustling of the branches
Aug 30, 2010
Aug 30, 2010 at 12:09 AM UTC
Vibrating strings create
Intensely beautiful sound
Of artistic expressions.
Lullabies, filled with
Internal longings discovered.
Nostalgia waves hello.
Nov 19, 2011
Nov 19, 2011 at 5:29 PM UTC
Where am I?
I don’t recognize this dark place,
Where cold arms have embraced me,
Clutching at my heart. My body’s inner-most core.
I have issues breathing,
This simple action I did without thought before has now become a painful challenge.
It feels as though I am drowning, being pulled deeper and deeper, where the water just gets progressively colder.
My chest is tight, my lungs are straining.
Once things were so simple.
Where have I been brought to?
I don’t remember heading for this place,
Nor even have the slightest memory of wanting to travel here.
No, not the smallest fleeting memory.
Tears are a constant threat now.
Always there, ready to burst free from their bleary prison.
My throat, being squeezed from some unknown source,
Gives me hardship when I attempt to speak.
To say out loud what it is that ails me.
Instead, I am unable to,
I refuse,
To allow someone in.
The fear of being ridiculed at the tip of my mind,
While forbidden thoughts and longings are stored in the back.
There are no words, can be no words,
To express this immense confusion.
This lack of direction…
Where…am I?
Nov 14, 2012
Nov 14, 2012 at 9:19 PM UTC
It is a lovely day here at my hometown
Going to do my routine. Running everything down
Decided to stop, in this lovely cafe
Ordered coffee and get back on my way
Bump to a stranger, dropped my belongings
I stared at his eyes, full of longings
Started to stand up, he offered his hands
I accepted it, and told him my apologies
He offered a drink but I declined
I decided to go
But he grabbed my arms
He said what's your name beautiful?
I said my name.
We talked and talked
We forgot everything that we had to do
It's like a spur in the moment
He sadly had to go
I saw his back turned to me walking
Suddenly he looked back
He yelled "Lovely scarf"
That's when I know
He'll be back
Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 5:28 AM UTC
I see around me tombstones grey
Stretching their shadows far away.
Beneath the turf my footsteps tread
Lie low and lone the silent dead -
Beneath the turf - beneath the mould -
Forever dark, forever cold -
And my eyes cannot hold the tears
That memory hoards from vanished years
For Time and Death and Mortal pain
Give wounds that will not heal again -
Let me remember half the woe
I've seen and heard and felt below,
And Heaven itself - so pure and blest,
Could never give my spirit rest -
Sweet land of light! thy children fair
Know nought akin to our despair -
Nor have they felt, nor can they tell
What tenants haunt each mortal cell,
What gloomy guests we hold within -
Torments and madness, tears and sin!
Well - may they live in ectasy
Their long eternity of joy;
At least we would not bring them down
With us to weep, with us to groan,
No - Earth would wish no other sphere
To taste her cup of sufferings drear;
She turns from Heaven with a careless eye
And only mourns that we must die!
Ah mother, what shall comfort thee
In all this boundless misery?
To cheer our eager eyes a while
We see thee smile; how fondly smile!
But who reads not through that tender glow
Thy deep, unutterable woe:
Indeed no dazzling land above
Can cheat thee of thy children's love.
We all, in life's departing shine,
Our last dear longings blend with thine;
And struggle still and strive to trace
With clouded gaze, thy darling face.
We would not leave our native home
For any world beyond the Tomb.
No - rather on thy kindly breast
Let us be laid in lasting rest;
Or waken but to share with thee
A mutual immortality -
4.4k
From If French Fries were Fat-free [and other longings]
Well, I made a ******* mess of my life
And like usual when I realise
Where I should go
It’s too ****** late.
Ad I see the door slam
And you thunder down the corridor
I press my head against the plaster.
If only French fries were fat-free
That would be one less cause of heartache
And if the whiskey really helped me
You’d see me smiling endlessly
The more I think about it, you know
The more I realise you were right.
So I raise my glass in a toast
Over my bowl of curlies.
They taste so good and yet I know
Deep down in my heart they’re so bad for me
Can’t I have one wish at least?
You back or French fries fat-free.
May 31, 2012
May 31, 2012 at 1:24 PM UTC
*A magical world
bleeding through
to other realities
longings
pains
joys
dreams
canvases
****** of muses
drama and rescue
symphony of wands*
Jul 25, 2013
Jul 25, 2013 at 9:15 PM UTC
“I think there’s something wrong with you and that’s okay,” she sings with all her heart
and strums the guitar with my pick.
I’m in charge of the chords,
holding the guitar so
she can reach it where she sits.
We dream it up together, but
I phone it in
I admit.
A, D, E - 1, 4, 5 -
arbitrarily chose.
She keeps it alive with her prose
Just 5 years old
A poet with her eyes closed.
You can be anything you want to be, and that’s okay as long as you’re happy.
Like she knows
The greatest longings of the whole of humanity,
Like she’s peered into the depths of the vast ocean of broken hearts,
And know this is the best place to start…
Like it’s easy.
“It’s okay”, she sings with closed eyes,
and strums the guitar in musical bliss.
And it is. For that moment. For a heartbeat.
It is.
Sep 26, 2021
Sep 26, 2021 at 9:57 PM UTC
~for better days for the poet betterdays~
mournful tunes play silently, but still too often,
eyes wet but in corners kept, recurring then the
memories, keepsakes, letters, books, small trinkets,
not dusty, but dusky, resting on in-between ledge of a
mountain-sized twilight of well lit shadowy haziness,
edgy dark brilliance, a comprehensible contrast non-comprehendible
tunes that bless with equal measures of grief,
comforting, by memorable card flashes of good relief,
a dividing line, hazy and frequented crossed, a sort of path,
with no destination signaled, as if the path itself was an end,
to a meaning, a solution, with no clarity divined, a division
of sight and insight, providing an ill fitting reconciliation
mourning is electric, morning is electric,
letters, words bottled up in evaporating perfume bottles,
seeking the comfort of dissipation unto a larger atmosphere,
the scent in everything tangible, stronger still yet, in intangibles
that can erode but never ever fail to return instantly when voked,
by vision, odor, a particular child’s smile, line in a poem volunteered
recovered, uncovered, a post first writ to be written, discovered,
when time and place coincidentally breathe together, at last,
beckoning you to places where memory serves only as a pleasuring,
upright mind marker, decorated in chains perpetual reforging,
absent pain, gleaming dreamings full-replacing longings for pasts,
new verses composed, passing, a grand addition to a child’s legacy
May 18, 2019
May 18, 2019 at 8:50 AM UTC
You see her there
Right in the middle
Between innocent youth
And tired old age
The redhead
The harlot
Open
Welcoming
Eternal
You see your fantasies
In her mysterious gaze
Your carnal longings
In the fire of her hair
Open
Alluring
Mature
You see her confidence
In her ***
Her experience
Her empowerment
Open
Provocative
Determined
You see what she'll do
To you
You see her
Touching
Lustfully luring you in
You see her
The redhead
The harlot
Your mistress
She is there
In the middle
Between youth
And old age
Always
I am her
I am here
I am eternal
Feb 25, 2013
Feb 25, 2013 at 2:56 AM UTC
The panther's blazing eyes
stares at him first , scrutinizing,
her rough tongue likes him clean
when amorous longings subdue.
May 10, 2014
May 10, 2014 at 9:43 PM UTC
The panther's blazing eyes scrutinize,
stare at him with an ambiguous interest,
her rough tongue licks him clean
when amorous longings finally ebb.
Jul 26, 2016
Jul 26, 2016 at 12:35 PM UTC