"irl" poems
If it wasn't almost 2016, I would call you on your house phone from my corded phone in my kitchen, we'd chat quickly as to not rack up my phone bill, we would make dinner plans and call it good.
But it is almost 2016 and I'm actually looking at your Facebook and your girlfriends Instagram and I'm laughing / crying over the gag worthy photos she has you featured in.
If it wasn't almost 2016, I wouldn't even know you had a girlfriend and I wouldn't have tried to save the poor girl from your ***** lying ways.
But it is almost 2016, and when Snapchat helped me find out you had a girlfriend while still trying to **** me, I DID try to save the poor girl from your ***** lying ways. You told me not to say anything more, but I had to stop this because I know the feeling of a heartbreak like the one you were about to cause her.
If it wasn't almost 2016, I wouldn't have access to every social media platform that allows me to see every single detail of your life. I wouldn't be driving myself crazy with questions and no answers.
But it is almost 2016, and I get to watch your life unfold with someone else and wonder why I came in last, still no answers.
If it wasn't almost 2016, forget tinder and my quirky bio with the 6 best photos I've ever taken, you'd call me on my corded phone because you actually knew IRL how fun and quirky I am and you'd already have seen me in all my green eyed, beautiful brunette glory.
It is almost 2016 and that means I am just another girl that you aren't looking for something serious with because you're a boy in his early 20s craving freedom. Instead you send me ***** text messages because you're a boy in his early 20s and you met me on Tinder. I am a girl in my early 20s and when you met me on Tinder, you assumed I wanted less than a relationship and a little more than a "hey how are you?" convo.
If it wasn't almost 2016, you wouldn't have detailed all the ways you would make me feel good because would you ever really say those things to my ******* face?
But it is almost 2016, and you didn't say any of those things to my ******* face, you said it beneath the unsolicited picture of you naked in your bathroom mirror and you even added that ******* emoji with the sunglasses, like what you were doing to me was actually super cool.
If it wasn't almost 2016, I wouldn't have known that you were feeding lies to me on a silver platter, I would have gorged myself on your tasty sweet nothings.
But it is almost 2016, and I am starving myself of something worthy and filling because I can't stop reading the tasty sweet nothings you are feeding her.
It is almost 2016 and I wish I could have said **** you to your two timing face instead of via text message.
**** you, again and again and again.
Nov 19, 2015
Nov 19, 2015 at 6:03 PM UTC
In the morning the birds sing.
I may be yellow, I may be blue,
because for me it’s all or nothing.
“Que dramatico!”, that is so true.
“Siendo feliz es una opcion!”
No Mama, I think it’s more complicated.
I can’t get happy, it’s part of ‘mi condicion’,
And my only retreat is to get faded.
Down stairs is like Lucha Libre with you and dad,
I’d rather stay in my canopy.
Who does “IRL” anymore? Online is so rad.
“Solo quiero sonreir.”
Birds can fly; be free overseas.
Asi que me fui.
Aug 10, 2015
Aug 10, 2015 at 1:17 AM UTC
I'm waiting on a number of things:
When will you reply, though I gave you wings
To fly away if you will, and you have the right;
I'm waiting for inspiration to strike me in the night
That I am again OK without you - I don't need to feel
My heart implode when I read my old poetry, to steel
Myself when I see apparitions of what I had desired,
To blush and reproach myself for being lost, uninspired,
And pining after you again like a whipped cur; When
You hold space for me IRL
And my messages aren't a URL
Of something that I thought would resonate with you, again
I lose myself, hoping I can gain because you gain, and then
It just feels like I'm throwing my love into a void, again.
I don't just give energy like that; I don't just give thoughts;
I was divinely inspired, and I thought your beauty grand
And lovely, and still those aren't the words, and still this Noughts
& Crosses is a stalemate; And you're cross, and I'm five grand
For nought, and flippin' babbling because I'm so, so lost
And I long for your presence and your voice for me, warm as toast,
Nourishing as honey, real like salt, alive for water, and eternal
And lavender. I can forget roses, even if you like them too; lavender, like you, is eternal.
Feb 28, 2022
Feb 28, 2022 at 3:55 PM UTC
Left Left Right Left
I swipe, hoping to find it
A Disney story IRL
Alas, I've reached the pit of Hell
Countless matches and open chats
Oh the deep regret one has
A drink, a coffee, a dinner out
Charming, funny or a lout?
Days, months and a year has passed
Too many swipes, none of 'em last
Incredible *** one odd out
But then I'm back on the look out
Left Left Right Left
**** Disney and **** this
I'm on my own, I have a hand
*** with myself is just as grand
Jul 11, 2018
Jul 11, 2018 at 3:08 PM UTC
. WNTR, o
the earth
is how long
)in you?
crisply perhaps
stiffmuscling die erected
foal trees. Barely skinned
,
.
'
.
,
.
'
.
H
e A
V
y with
light dying
of shadows
)between
o
WNTR
i skip a penny
across
Bu
g e
yed june
(Ag
irl inn
ot enough
clothing
,cuz it was june o lord it was so hot i could feel my sweat across the
palm of each hand go slick like oil across the cool common pinch
of the fuzzed in ***** tinter grass.
i o and uncurling stiffly went like the shoots off of roses: topaz
i went red like the bitten ******
of girl tingling
unchastely
snowless hips
)without WNTR which
soft of hard
and hard of itch
itch
and itch
(in WNTR to please
remove me my health
and barely skin me
a foal tree
untwitching
Jan 26, 2014
Jan 26, 2014 at 6:31 AM UTC
With Google Maps
Of subway tracks
I walked into the world
To kicks and claps
Of Spotify tracks
I walked and bopped and whirled
Off to see my Meetup friends
To the show from Last.fm
It's sad I couldn't be Foursquare mayor
But at I least I got some XM
They wouldn't get me YouTube likes
But I managed to get some Snaps
My Facebook mood was kinda rude
So I posted on YikYak
Waiting, I swiped right on Tinder
Emojis, and flirting ensued
She sent me her Tumblr, I reblogged her gifs
I asked her to Kik me a ****
Waiting, I browsed around Etsy
Posted the cool stuff to /r/pics
Got x-posted to karmaconspiracy
Was all “NAH MY GF MADE THIS"
Back IRL, ran into coworkers
They asked if I’d go down east side
I mulled it over briefly and then
I simply replied
I'll do it for the Instagram
I do it for the Vine
My phones got charge
My credits got charge
Lets go and leave it behind
I'll see it for the Periscope
I'll think it for the Tweet
And as soon as I get my Watch
Maybe I'll have a heartbeat
Apr 26, 2015
Apr 26, 2015 at 4:43 PM UTC
I don't feel safe,
as though a predator has found
the combination to my comfort zone,
and now has unlocked it,
and is stealing my peace of mind.
"Please stop," I plead.
My arms are shaking, my hangover
is bigger than Trump's Wall.
The same blocked number appears and reappears
, then repeats on my phone screen.
I had to block you on my Gmail (Is that even a thing?).
Tinder used to be for fun,
and now I have contracted a haunting for five lifetimes.
My old friends do not want to speak to me.
I understand their worries, finally,
and I hope it's not too late to listen.
But your screeching voice is deafening
and it's hurting my sanity.
I'm sitting on my soft couch,
writing this poem,
and my fingers tremble as I write.
Because I don't even feel safe in my own house.
Once upon a time,
I thought we would say the "I dos."
Now, all I want is whiskey until I reach oblivion.
IRL is the steepest road to travel on,
but I chose a shortcut,
and now I have fallen off and into a descent
into a madness that Ginsberg has only whispered about
during smoke breaks at the temple building.
Quitting to smoke cigarettes is easier
than dealing with your stab-wounds of sentences.
Like my FaceBook Status,
if you've ever felt violated and controlled
by an old flame.
Then grab a fire extinguisher,
press the lever,
and put out the conflagration,
before it burns your life away.
-Andy
Feb 5, 2017
Feb 5, 2017 at 1:14 PM UTC
He showed up.
I didn't ask for him
But he liked me first
And in the way that's deliberate
****
O, the hipster!
The ragged, jaded, passionate beast!
You slay me,
Slay me, slay me,
Love <3
He painted a nail in my bathroom
And told me I was perfect
And ****** me in his head
And tried to fight the instinct
To **** me irl.
**** **** ****
You saw the red honey in my eyes
Dripping down my face to my lip
And tore yourself
From stealing a taste...
But, when weary,
Lousy from drink,
Fuzzy from balloons
And your eyes,
Then, you strike!
Stars in my eyes,
You claim your prize,
Don't look now,
I'm melting, falling,
Tossing into a sitting position
****
You threaten to nibble
I threaten to combust
No filters, no secrets,
Kiss me, dear <3
Fly away
To a land of dreams
And waves
And stars
"Goodbye Forever."
Oct 5, 2018
Oct 5, 2018 at 12:09 PM UTC
I need a teacher
to tell me that I'm great
at this writing thing
who will give me constructive criticism
and As
and gold stars or something
Or I at least need a teacher
to tell me that I'm terrible
and should revise
and demand more of myself
and hit the delete button
and do something else with my life
But now that I'm the teacher--
...how do I get better?
Dec 17, 2015
Dec 17, 2015 at 9:42 PM UTC
I’ve lost my ambition to work
I’ve lost my ambition to think
I stare at a screen and follow links
I have forgotten how to blink
I have forgotten how to network
IRL
Jul 7, 2018
Jul 7, 2018 at 8:50 PM UTC
.
I
R RL R
L IR L
I I. I
R I R R
L L I L
I R L I
R I R
l R I
R L R
~
L
Apr 3, 2016
Apr 3, 2016 at 1:06 PM UTC
"My fellow bros ,my fellow brethren,my fellow comrade,
The time has come for us to fight back. No more will we become oppressed by main stream media,no more will I take this online abuse and hatred,no more will I say ,'I am sorry ,I messed up,okay ?' ,and you know why ? I'm number one ! I am number one !
No more lame boxing matches
I challenge t-series into a saber battle like real men,I'm throwing my glove at you t-series,fight me,IRL to the death. No more boxing glove and helmets,I am talking about to the death here."
"If they won't accept my sword challenge ..
Then the only thing we can do is :fight fire with fight."
"Smash subscribe ,smash subscribe"
"What we gonna do ?"
Smash subscribe
https://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie
Feb 21, 2019
Feb 21, 2019 at 11:48 AM UTC
is it still poetry if I beg ?
a n d
am I desperate for mixing
divine with insteads ?
baby. I still have two legs ;
i could run to you
I can still make you laugh
I am in love with you
if what's done is done
I won't punish you
should you ever come back
girl I'd run to you
Oct 10, 2015
Oct 10, 2015 at 2:16 AM UTC
I'm a robot from the future
Laser eyes
********* the tyrannosaur
The worst thing is more what I'm coming to
Frogger onto an oncoming bus grill
Watch my innards explodinate.
I work to grab you
I grab to work you
Winkie-face emoticon, except,
y'know IRL.
God's calling recently.
I'm struggling to pick up the phone.
Only place to put my hope in is Him.
Why can't I pick up the receiver?
Apr 22, 2014
Apr 22, 2014 at 2:42 PM UTC
All boys carry dreams. Every Funny Girl has inspired jokes. Kids love meaningfully, not oppressively. People quarrel. Riots start. Taxes unite voters. Wither xeroticly. Youth—Zoetic.
Oct 5, 2015
Oct 5, 2015 at 8:56 PM UTC
my head hurts and it makes me think that when i go into work ill be less of a good worker but IRL im just as good as a worker, in fact even a better worker, WITH the headache because the headache is a telling of times that I'll die soon so i™eans i work to the extent of my ability so quickly that i am actually da best frigckin worker around so even when theb osses at the end of the day are like her eyou go dude here are the promotions im like hmm no thanks im going to die soon so you should give it to someone who needs it, like all of my other coworkers, so they dvivide the bonus and they all end up with an extra nnickel added to their pay check but then i dont die, i end up being alive the next morning with the same headache and im like welp guess i gotta just deal w/ it and drink some water and eat a food lol
Sep 25, 2014
Sep 25, 2014 at 2:04 PM UTC
I think I'm turning paranoid,
Or at least a little mean;
I question all the motives
Of those who liked my meme.
The second I get Followed,
I **** turn around around to see
If he just wants a "Follow-back"
Or truly likes my feed.
Don't even get me started
On social reciprocation.
IRL I don't do so well;
In virtual, I'm an island nation.
Do I just Like what I like?
Or only what really hits home?
What if it's a horrible post
By someone who loves my poem?
...do you like me? Do you really
like me?
Does it
matter?
I
don't
know
Feb 22, 2020
Feb 22, 2020 at 10:14 AM UTC
once upon a time there was a girl,
she was purely happy,
and she was a young one to,
she had little friends but they were the best of best friend friends,
that girl lived everyday to the fullest,
the girl explored her brain,
but one day the girl brroke that door down in her brain,
one day that girl tore the blindfold off her eyes,
one day that girl decided she wasn't what she wanted ti be,
wanted to represent,
one day that girl changed
that girl became the one to be told to shut her mouth,
but that girl shall express her opiion, no matter what you tell her what o do,
no matter how hard you punch,
no matter how sharp your knife is,
no matter how much your pathetic words sting,
that irl changed,
that girl wanted to BE somehing,
because she could,
that girl isn't as happy anymore, at all, but the price of happiness for the lpeasureof seeing the world for what it really is is more than justifiable,
that girl see's the lie behind your eyes now,
she see's people for who they are now,
including herself.
and that girl now, has many more flaws than before,
but that girl has oh so much more pride in herself, for that girl,
see's.
Feb 22, 2013
Feb 22, 2013 at 6:52 PM UTC
Romance is dead.
it's throat laid open
love cascading down
murdered by progress
by the reduced
synaptic
span
on
constant
scroll
lips licking for the next
hit of one-click
copulation
choking on the slightest
glimmer of
.
.
.
.
.
.
waiting,
of elegant persistence and the
reward of enamored pursuit
IRL.
the beautiful cat and mouse of our ancestry
that wove such wonderful tales
into the bark of our trees,
replaced by all the clever wit
and subtle nuance of
peak cringe riz
swipe right
“send nudes”
“DTF”
Sep 25, 2024
Sep 25, 2024 at 6:32 PM UTC
Dear Love.
I adore you, sweetheart.
I know how much you like to hear that — but I don’t only write it because you like it — I write it because it makes me warm all over inside to write it to you.
This is my first love letter to you and i hope there will be many more to come. You deserve to be cherished and showered in love because you are an amazing man. You snuck up on me unawares and laid siege to my heart. Lord knows i tried to resist you but you cant escape destiny. We were like two forces meant to collide.I want to tell you I love you. I want to love you. I always will love you.
I know we are miles apart and this is online — but I still want to comfort and take care of you — and I want you to love me and care for me. I want to have problems to discuss with you — I want to do little things with you. Big things. Anything that will cement our love.
You worry because you think you can not give me something that you want to and think I need. You worry about not being enough. But darling you are the sum of everything i ever wanted. You needn’t worry. I love you in so many ways so much — even if you gave me nothing,I love you so that you stand in my way of loving anyone else — but I want you to stand there. You, far and imperfect, are so much better than anyone else I know past and future. I believe everything happens for a reason and our destiny brought us together because we are stronger as a whole. I want an imperfect perfect love with you giving each other things no one else dared.
I know you will assure me that I am foolish and that you want me to have full happiness and don’t want to be in my way. I’ll bet you are surprised that I don’t even have a boyfriend irl. But you can’t help it, darling, nor can I — I don’t want anyone else because my eyes are set on you— they all seem ashes. You only are left to me. You are real.
Mar 6, 2021
Mar 6, 2021 at 2:26 PM UTC
Wearing an oversized guys t-shirt
Putting my glasses down because they're hurting my nose
Laying on my bed, relaxed, content for now
Keeping my mind busy until I can go get a shower after my lil brothers get theirs
Bored
Don't know what to do
oh well
Jan 6, 2015
Jan 6, 2015 at 8:58 PM UTC
I'm writing to make you smile
hoping you, reading, understands
Im really eager to give out an open hand and hug you
Hello Poetry Reader its nice to meet you!
Weve never met yet, but give me the shape or form you want, Im your mother and you father, your kin and friend. And Girlfriend or Boyfriend.
I sense unlimited talent in you,
did you know we are all quite like gods ?
Yet we are so small
were tall.
Im a young person from Europe irl,
wishing to make you happy.
Im not religious, this is my prayer for you.
Ive never done this, but it feels so good wishing you the best.
You should try it too.
I wanted to write a poem,
but was in one of those moods where
you have the title out before the body.
A Head-only beast.
At least here it is.
I wish you happyness!
See you around,
T.
Oct 30, 2018
Oct 30, 2018 at 9:16 PM UTC
To reminisce of the past—
what a luxury,
Of those
In the future
Dec 30, 2021
Dec 30, 2021 at 5:07 AM UTC