"hardheaded" poems
i wish i knew how to put some pretty words together;
in a way that you could read me and cry without realizing it,
in a way that you don't know how it all suddenly made sense
but it all fell together - so right - till the end.
with the steady hand of a seamstress and the persistence of a theorist,
i would string together wispy letters, carefully taking away
and holding all the guilty, lukewarm feelings of self-romanticized nostalgia,
with those hollow, deep pangs of shamelessly missing you
from the somewheres and over theres beneath my ribs.
sometimes, i really miss you - and all of those times, i hate it.
sometimes i stare back at you longer than i should,
but i'm beginning to think that even looking your way
is much worse than a waste of sweet time at this point.
i don't want you inside of my mind anymore.
my wants and needs and maybes of tomorrow are foggy and furiously blinded with
what you used to make me feel. will i ever want anything that much again?
i see you a lot in my mind, smiling handsomely in a way that kind of ****** me off.
in some way, i am overwhelmingly upset in a way i can't describe, in such a strange dialect that
i've maybe only begun to understand when you spoke it to me with watery eyes and an offkey tone:
"i can't do it." i think i know what you mean now.
you were trying to say something deep, i had thought all along,
but i think you were just trying, just simply trying to go along
with something that was safe; you know, i forgive you for playing it safe.
we're just trying to protect what little good we think is left.
i wish i could have tried just as hard; tried harder/ to be with you
because i'm just so tired
(i need to rub my eyes clear)
that i will exasperatingly admit that i am lost after you.
i'm so ruthlessly childish, in a curious way that i refuse to let these warm,
painful feelings for you go.
ruthlessly, still into you, i'm so hardheaded that i will even ignore myself
to forget you
over
(this is the last time i'll look back on you)
and over
(i swear his name won't come to me tomorrow)
again.
you replay in my mind;
maybe one day i will
forget that you ever really meant everything to me once
anyways.
Jan 13, 2014
Jan 13, 2014 at 8:46 PM UTC
I have a neighbor his name was Envy.
Though I am sleeping, he always wakes me up.
I admit that I am annoyed and never see a favor.
Why is he like that? so hardheaded man.
I never want him to be my companion.
His family was not a good example.
Everyone of them were drunkards,
Even the baby inside the womb of his daughter.
They have no hope to be seen and hear.
All things they have were all stolen from elsewhere.
Like Mr. and Mrs. Greed their grand grand parent.
Were so good in trickery to fool the eyes.
From the oldest one to youngest were in training.
In the famous Mobster University located everywhere.
Jul 18, 2013
Jul 18, 2013 at 11:54 PM UTC
Someone find me peace
Find me a silence that is terrifyingly deep
Find me a white noise in the background of dreams
Find the voices and calm them please
Find the crazy and bring it to it's knees
Find a gun to shoot it between
Large eyes glowing green
Find anything that might make me feel free
If you see that I'm chained, find the key
Someone find me kindness
In the hearts of the open-minded
Find the heartless
Give them each a piece of my heart so I can hurt less
Find the tired and lonely and hardheaded
Tell them to stop making the sun shine less
Find me the the ones who make the timed tests
They need to tell me how much time I have left
Someone find my Nirvana
Sep 23, 2013
Sep 23, 2013 at 10:21 PM UTC
Drink and I feel hopeless,
Smoke and I feel the dopeness,
My words are monumental,
Need to put em down on an instrumental,
Just to lay the stencil,
Taking notes with a pencil,
People make it in life just making songs of dances,
I write about a ***** named Carson's advancements,
Took me a while,
Hardheaded ever since I was wild as a child.
Jun 27, 2014
Jun 27, 2014 at 1:35 AM UTC
Did I do something to upset god? Or did I do something to upset the devil? Either way, I’m affected. I don’t know how to fix it. At least not on my own. I’ve admitted it now. I’m not strong enough on my own. But who will help? Who can I trust? I’m too hardheaded to understand or let the help sink in deep. Why am I so stubborn? Why can’t I get help? Wait. That’s a lie. I can. It just won’t help me. Help that doesn’t help. Sadness that keeps getting sad. Darkness that gets darker. But an end that just won’t come.
Nov 2, 2013
Nov 2, 2013 at 10:50 PM UTC
I listen to hardheaded echoes
Most are disturbed by the haunting cackles
What we have been bred to believe is quite unfathomable
Yet proceed to feed as the elitest of chapels
Begin to unwind my theory of string
Followers may be all I need
Apr 25, 2013
Apr 25, 2013 at 9:30 AM UTC
i very much enjoy the idea of us being one
it seems to make a lot of sense
as does the idea of you not being such a hardheaded *****
i very much like the idea of you talking to me
we could come up with quite the conversation topic
it could stir up a *** of friendship!
yes, *** the silverware, not the plant
don't you see,
what could be
if it became we
Apr 13, 2014
Apr 13, 2014 at 10:32 PM UTC
It's not enough to complain
It's not enough to feel shame
It's not enough to give up after
U fail. It's not enough to go blame
The neighborhood u grew in
Or the ppl u were around
No excuse is enough to justify
So u can just deny knowing how
To succeed and exceed what u
perceive in your dreams
It's not enough to just proceed if u
bleed for what u believe by all means
It's not enough to try, give up and Cry
while u surrender and accept this
Cuz hardheaded and stubborn
when positive, is called relentless
So address this where your address is
and if u find no way
There's a huge world out there,
so learn while u search and maybe one day
Ill see u on the other side
Where no one ******* or complains
Where no one is slowed by
Failure or fear cuz they're driven by pain
Where u don't even need a brain
Just passion and will
Cause if your still ****** breathing
Than be believing u have a chance still
And I write this not only to ****
The doubt that poisons ur mind
But while stressin im confessin
Ill admit this is to **** mine
Cuz we all get weak at times
Where we actually consider
birthing a child of regret while bitter
And becoming its full time babysitter
Conceived with life thatll ***** you
Without any protection
And even those who oppose abortion
Would see this as the exception
Just make sure u never let them
C- section your heart
Keep fighting back, cuz keeping Faith
when life falls apart is nothing short of an art
It can be beautiful but dark
It can be abstract and expensive
And remember stubborn and hard headed
when positive is called relentless
Jan 10, 2015
Jan 10, 2015 at 11:06 PM UTC
When did I fall in Love with Hip-Hop? I remember seeing her, long legs, green eyes, beautiful features. I did not know Hip-Hop like I do now, I wish I had met you sooner. Hip-Hop had me infatuated, I had to get to know her.
Next thing I know Hip-Hop spoke to me and from then I knew I had to pursue Hip-Hop. A couple of days went by, and I finally built up the courage to introduce myself. From then I knew wherever Hip-Hop is, that is where I want to be.
The pursuit was magical still is. I Love the way Hip-Hop made and still makes me feel today. When did I fall in Love with Hip-Hop? In all honesty I don’t know when I fell in Love with Hip-Hop. Maybe it was when I first seen her or going through certain trials and tribulations along the way. I definitely made the choice to Love her with all my heart. No matter the type of Rhythm she has or if she is following the beat of her own, I Love her and everything about her.
Hip-Hop did not give up on me, she gave me more purpose. That was to cherish her forever. Hip-Hop is just right for me. I will Love her music in any era, time, and place. She became my muse for life.
Hip-Hop saved my life in a way that I did not even see coming. Hip-Hop tested me in many ways and helps me understand how to be a man. It taught me the value of time and energy. Hip-Hop gave me a family I always wanted. For that I will always fight for and to protect.
Hip-Hop value is truly beyond words. I want to be able to keep increasing that value. I want to protect and nurture that value. I genuinely appreciate her. I do not want to be scared or hardheaded when it comes to Hip-Hop, I just want to listen to her melody and dance with her soulfully. I would do anything for Hip-Hop, she has my heart. She always has.
No matter what phases Hip-Hop go through I will always Love, listen and dance with her. From the sole of my feet to the top of my head Hip-Hop will always make me peaceful, happy, and grateful.
Feb 12, 2025
Feb 12, 2025 at 3:02 PM UTC
I loved you even with your mistakes
I loved you through your addiction
I loved your soul
I loved your body
I loved your messy hair
I loved your heart
I loved you when you weren't lovable
I loved you when you didn't love me
I loved you when you chose something over me
I loved you when drugs were your best friend
I loved you when you didn't love yourself
I loved you when you were being hardheaded
I loved you when love wasn't enough
I loved you with a broken heart
I loved you when you were the one that broke my heart
I loved you when you let me down
I loved you because I loved you
I loved you because I saw the man you could be
I loved you because you made me feel alive
I loved you because you're you
The point is I loved you
May 27, 2016
May 27, 2016 at 12:23 AM UTC
I can be impatient
At times I'm weak when faced with temptation
I nervously bite my nails and cuticles
I may not always look oh so beautiful
I can be so sensitive
I'm very argumentative
I can be very hardheaded
but I must say I have many good qualities
like how I put others before me
how you can count on me, thats guaranteed
I sincerely care how others feel
If between you and I, Ill let you get the better deal
I give the best massages
but most of all I love how big my heart is
and although I might be a bit crazy and controlling
and you might never know how to deal with my emotions
I cant promise things will be perfect because in life nothing is certain
but I can promise that I will always tell you whats on my mind never holding things inside
comfort you when your feeling blue and when life can seem too crude
I will carry you when you feel you cant keep going because I know far to well how it feels to be broken
So tell me my love are you ready to sail through the seasons of my life?
through the highs and lows of my ocean ties
-E.G
Jun 4, 2016
Jun 4, 2016 at 2:05 AM UTC
It's not enough to complain
It's not enough to feel shame
It's not enough to give up after
U fail. It's not enough to go blame
The neighborhood u grew in
Or the ppl u were around
No excuse is enough to justify
So u can just deny knowing how
so if you need to work
3 jobs, while u scratch and claw
your way to whatever dream thay lay
awaiting you to sink teeth and lock ur jaw
break your enemy and the law
create a strength with ur flaw
like having deadly aids and using it
to **** ur enemy by sleeping with his wife or dog
whatever it takes do the job
be stubborn and never listen
to the dreamkilling dream-penis blockers
who want u to fail so u can be kissin
the same *** they kiss, dont miss ur chance
dont over think
take what u want like bill cosby does after
making a woman a drink
cuz To succeed and exceed what u perceive
in your dreams, and become
a man than if u have to bleed for what u believe
then by all means cuz success ends
when your sacrifices do, so dont give up and
Cry while u surrender if not, pains expected
be hardheaded and stubborn cause its a positive,
thing in this case but differently name as relentless
So address this where your address is
and if u find no way theres a huge world
out there, so keep learning and maybe one day
Ill see u on the other side
Where no one ******* or complains
Where no one is slowed by
Failure or fear cuz they're all driven by pain
Where u don't even need a brain
Just passion and will
Cause if your still ****** breathing
Than be believing u have a chance still
And I write this not only to ****
The doubt that poisons ur mind
But while stressin im confessin
Ill admit this is also to **** mine
Cuz we all get weak at times
Where we actually consider
birthing a child of regret while bitter
And become its new mom, no babysitter
Conceived with life who will *** u
Without any protection
And even those who oppose abortion
Would see this as the exception
Just make sure u never let them
C- section out your heart
Keep fighting back, cuz kept Faith when life falls apart
is nothing short of an art
It can be beautiful but dark
It can abstract and expensive
And remember stubborn and hard headed when positive
is called relentless
May 23, 2015
May 23, 2015 at 11:14 PM UTC
Since I’m too hardheaded for a gunshot,
I’ll wait for these thoughts
to fade like phases of sunspots.
© Matthew Harlovic
Dec 1, 2015
Dec 1, 2015 at 11:46 PM UTC
You look like your mother, they said
To be like her, I'd rather be dead
What mother you know would abandon her kids
Weeks at a time and leave no food there
A trifling mom who didn't seem to care
You was too high to realize that it would affect me over the years
Thought I'd be fine but for many nights shed tears
Having to move from place to place with different relatives
Living with them was a dead giveaway
When you took your love away it felt like God closed a door that day
Over the years I've endured so much pain
Even when the sun was shining mine was filled with rain
You left a scar on my heart that will always remain
I know this may sound crazy, ludicrous, or even insane
If you haven't been through this you haven't felt my pain
Try losing your mother and think your life would remain the same
Well I guess you know now what it's like to have no mom
You lost yours in '97; I lost mine in '85
I bet you were hurt being you just lost your love
But you see you knew your mom; I didn't know who mine was
Maybe you're the reason why I am the way I am today
Hardheaded, stubborn, and don't listen to what people say
I can't stand you, mom, and it shouldn't be this way
Don't worry if not now one day you'll have to pay
I just hope one day I can explain this to my kids
How you were a good for nothing mom and you were never really there.
Apr 8, 2015
Apr 8, 2015 at 10:39 AM UTC
I do not struggle
With the concept of trouble
I often chase it
I brush away rules
Just like a hardheaded fool
It's time I face it
Vividly aware
I stop full pace and I stare
At only a thought
Thoughts that hold the world
My small mind races and swirls
Ensnared, trapped, and caught
But I think too much
Often I spit and I cuss
Knowing I fall deep
Please try to give me
The rich bittersweet release
To finally, breathe
Feb 18, 2019
Feb 18, 2019 at 12:55 PM UTC
Black & milds burning my fingers.
I know that it's bad, but it feels so good.
Stress weighing on me heavy.
I talk to God, but, no clear answers.
Tell me what I'm fighting for.
Dear God, if you're up there, tell what I'm fighting for.
What am I crying for?
Hoodie over my head, God, what am I hiding for?...
You spend your whole life trying to be perfect,
Just to find out that you ain't ****
You try to be the guy that carries all the burdens, including your own,
But you realize you're ill-equipped.
You break everything you come across: glasses, vases, and hearts that are now lost,
Because of you.
This poem is not from my point of view,
But if it was I'd understand why he feels so blue…
You see living in this life, you're bound to feel doomed.
Good things can happen to you, but negatives will still loom.
And people wanna be all close and personal with you and your truths,
But nobody's loyal around here, all they want is your truce;
Not to be cordial, but just to get in on the news,
That's why I choose a lane to pave, and never say when I move.
But even when you try to be humble,
You start to get in your feelings when you hear the slightest mumble.
And then you wanna rumble,
All along we've been living in a jungle, and I don’t mean no New York.
We in a world and generation where your “homies”’will eat and not bring extra forks,
They will let you starve.
Selfish and self righteous,
Very messy with their moves.
That's why I rarely go out, and my friends, I let God hand pick and choose…
Now the perception is mine.
Hoodie still on, world’s cold, but I'm doing fine.
Black N milds still sitting in the cup holder while I drive,
Formulating lies in case my mom found out like “they ain't even mine.”
“Well why they in your car? You want your lungs get black and die?”
“Man, momma them ain't mine. They must belong to one my guys.”
Can't erase the unerasable, or trace the untraceable.
10 times out of 10, all your wrongs will come back to you.
That's why I keep my guards up like Garda,
Because karma’s like that crazy ex girlfriend you can't shake off of you.
I've been finessing the systems.
I've been showing all of the symptoms of a hardheaded BOY that just won't listen,
And think he's a man, and that he can stand on his own to.
And will tell you to your face he never wanted you.
Counterfeit power.
Egotistical attitude,
That is sure to fall through.
Let him fall through…
Apr 22, 2017
Apr 22, 2017 at 4:18 PM UTC
I am the marionette’s puppeteer
Beside her is where I always wanted to be near
I swear I’m willing to offer her my every tear
And to lose her is the only thing that I fear
My marionette’s name is Reverie
Sometimes she is just so proud and hardheaded
So I have to control her harshly
I know she always gets me wrong, but still I love her wholeheartedly
In our world—the art of puppetry
Where the primary goal is the audience’s gaiety
This love for my one and only Reverie
has no place and is considered unseemly.
Sorry if I have left you, my beloved Reverie
For there is no such thing as love in puppetry…
Forgive me for I followed the norms of society
I loved you but if you think I dumped you, then let it be
I know I’m a coward for I instead married
a human— a woman with dignity whose name was Valerie…
Aug 4, 2017
Aug 4, 2017 at 12:00 PM UTC
Who I am?
Stubborn, a little hardheaded to some.
Even if I never admit it.
Ambitious, kind and wonderful person.
A nice gentle soul.
One many never seen.
One many will never know.
Who I am?
Everything about any of us isn't meant to be told.
Just a little to get us up and over.
We are like agents keeping secrets undercover.
Why be amazed?
When those we know say "they didn't know that".
Cause who I am?
Is who I chose to be?
Accept that!
This is who I am?
And who I be?
Aug 6, 2016
Aug 6, 2016 at 8:53 PM UTC
Look! I can spell FATHER:
FAILURE
ABUSIVE
****
HARDHEADED
EDGEY
ROUND
May 26, 2018
May 26, 2018 at 4:02 PM UTC
Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
In your cowboy boots and your painted on jeans
All decked out like a cowgirl's dream
Why'd you come in here looking like that
Here comes my baby
Draggin' my heart behind
He's drivin' me crazy
Who says love is blind
He's got a wanderin' eye and a travelin' mind
Big ideas and a little behind
Out with a different woman every night
But I remember when he was mine
Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
In your high heel boots and your painted on jeans
All decked out like a cowgirl's dream
Waltzing right in here lookin' like that
Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
When you could stop traffic in a gunny sack
Why you're almost givin' me a heart attack
When you waltz right in here lookin' like that
I just can't stand it
To see him on the town
He's out slow dancing
With every girl around
I'm a softhearted woman he's a hardheaded man
And he's gonna make me feel just as bad as he can
He's got himself a mean streak a half a mile wide
Now he's dancing on this heart of mine
Ooh, Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
In your high heel boots and your painted on jeans
All decked out like a cowgirl's dream
Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
In your cowboy boots and your painted on jeans
All decked out like a cowgirl's dream
Why'd you come in here lookin' like that
Aug 25, 2023
Aug 25, 2023 at 6:32 PM UTC
Every passing day is a battle
All those days I put up an act
Battles that'll surely test a man's mettle
Whilst keeping thy sanity intact
For I fight not through a battlefield
But on a huge stage alone with her and I
Pushing through, baring no shield
With confidence alone, victory is nigh
Dancing through the ecstatic beat
To waver or to falter is no option
For she is gonna be my greatest feat
A gem in the darkest depths of the ocean
She might be hardheaded
Who's to say I'm not the same
To her sweet embrace, I'm headed
And her heart I shall lay claim
Jul 24, 2019
Jul 24, 2019 at 10:23 AM UTC