my past lies behind me
like the hairs that are tangled
into a bun resting on the back of my neck
like the world that dangles in my rear view mirror of my vintage
car with the torn seats
it comes to me daily
in everything i do
its there
it always will be there
but my future reminds me as its gushing through my windshield onto my face
its making my long brunette waves shimmer
and my olive skin glow
that something brighter is ahead

i was the flesh you needed
to cover your aching bones
but then your skeleton
decided he didn't need a home

In my head it's 2 a.m. and you're as awake as I am
heads against our pillows and we're both thinking of each other but neither of us know it
you're missing me
and you're unsure of whether you even knew me well enough to have the privilege of missing me at all
but you miss me for the things we never said
and in my head you're thinking of how you never really got close enough to wrap your arms around my waist
to tell me everything I made you feel and everything you saw coming
that never quite played out how you wanted
In my head even your fingers are sad when you think about my skin
even your lips burn at the thought of never kissing mine again
but it's probably just in my head

it starts off like this,
I hold his face in the palm of my hand
and lean in for a kiss.
suddenly, reality is nonexistent
and it’s just him & I.
I look into his eyes,
and discover my favorite constellation
are the heavenly stars  
gleaming in his eyes.
as he tells me im beautiful,
I get this feeling in my body
that feels so right to me
and I feel like this is where I belong.
my lips on his
my skin against his
my eyes lost into his
this is where my heart belongs.

Finally, at last.
I thought you'd never leave my mind.
But today, for the first time in 142 days.
I didn't woke up,
Thinking about you.
Surprisingly, I never thought this was love.
Just a stupid remedy,
For a self broken heart.
But dispite the fact I'm not thinking about you.
You still left your fingerprints on my skin.
And your voice in my ears.

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