Porcelain bodies are hovering over
me and my shattered remains, yet here you
are, in your soft beauty, pulling my shards
together with thread into a palpable
stretch of thought. Who would have thought that beauty
like you would see this in a pile of
dust that was left to disperse?

Wellbeing is an illness that plagues my mind
regardless of what others believe it to be.

Someone please, help me.
I'm in little broken pieces
On the ground.
Like a doll,
Angrily thrown by
A grieving mother;
A mother that lost her little girl.
I am that little girl, I suppose.
In some form or another,
My mother has lost me;
So has my father,
And my sisters and friends.
They don't know where
The happy, lovely me went.
I've been replaced by pain,
Depression, and dark thoughts.
I wear a painted face,
Just like a doll,
That hides my pain and sorrow.
I don't want them disappointed
In the new me;
The one that has consumed
All of the good and love,
And replaced it with harm and anger.
Someone please, I'm begging you.
Shatter me against the wall.
Make me the target,
Because I deserve it.

A sliver, a shadow,
Peeking round the corner
I try to shy, to run and hide,
But it's always behind my shoulder

Grabs a hold, won't let go
Can anyone relate? I'll never know
Look in the mirror to try and see
The demon standing next to me

It walks like me, talks like me,
Laughs like me, acts like me
Follows me, tortures me,
Asphyxiating, I CAN'T BREATHE

Wanna run, I know I can't hide
From the demon I released and harboured inside..

And it affects me so...
Can't, let, go.....

So I'll live with it,
Accept it
This is my life now
As much as I want it to go,
It's my silhouette, my shadow...

I'd like it to go
As far away as possible
But as much as I want it gone...
Like a part of me, it belongs...

I'm paranoid, always look around
Turn fast at even the slightest sound
Can't help it, just how I am
Hopefully you understand

I know I'm being watched, by what lies behind
The past and the present like cars collide
In shattered glass, flying past,
Slow-motion, infinitely lasts

Slam the brakes but it's too late
Accelerate guarantees the fate
Things will happen and will be seen
By the shadow that lurks behind the scenes

And it sees me so,
And can't seem to let me go...

So I'll live with it,
Accept it
This is my life now
As much as I want it to go,
It's my silhouette, my shadow...

I'd like it to go
As far away as possible
But as much as I want it gone...
Like a part of me, it belongs...

Let go, let go...
A part of me that I want gone
But like my soul I guess it belongs
Go, goooooo....
I guess I'll just get used to it
Despite the fact it lacks common sense

"We'll dance with monsters
In the night"
You say with pleasure;
With really blind sight

You told me it is fine
But I think you are too kind
Onto me you have thrown
All your suction of hopes
Cutting down the thorns;
Cutting down the ropes
Ousting this flame
To show me that you came

I am sorry to be saying
But all your love was wasted
As my garden is decaying
Before you could have tasted

What I hold
Is not so very sweet
So I will just be bold
We should've never meet

I failed to be the light
You found in love
I failed to be your pigeon;
I failed to be your dove

And the monsters killed the melodies,
the ones that you dream
Unloved they forever were;
Their sorrows built a stream
A stream where tears shine
And the lost beasts are mine

These silent beasts are now
Just beginning to sound
Mercilessly,
I cried out;
Blatantly,
I have fallen down
And I just can not pick my Happy off the ground

You're building a palace
Where I do not belong
'Cause I have only been taking
The sing from your song
I know that you have
Been very burnt
But every new fire
Is a new lesson learnt

I am Sorry for making
You feel this pain
I am Sorry for putting
Your heart through this flame

Just please do not say
You love me
I might not say it back
Please just stay in intact
And stop all this play;
Forever is not real.

Just really close your eyes
'Cause I do not want you seeing
Throughout my disguise

I am carefully trying
to replace our bodies
For to all my cages and doors,
Are very lost keys

There is something terribly wrong
With our lungs
It is this poison of love  
That we have been breathing in too long
It has fractured our hearts
Turned it really mauve

Made us golden pale
It has destroyed our sail
Shattering our wings
Scattering all the feathers
Like fast demons fly
Through the weary sky

As pretty as you make
this tragedy feels,
Broken and poor
Life is just too blue
To ever truly be
La vie en rose

-fir.m