To be a poet,
Is to constantly battle your greatest enemy,
Yourself.
If your mind is not your greatest adversary,
You'll never feel freedom in what you write,
Because if you didn't battle for the thought,
You didn't win it's right.

these days I analyze and modify my routine
each second I spend of the 24 hours,
with hope I can control the fluctuations of how I feel
in a day.
I brush my teeth, I critically think of everything,
I'm going insane.
I'm normal just like you.
I Feed myself scenarios and "what ifs" for breakfast
(I'm feeling all of it for a reason, it'll come back soon.)
Ponder much more, move much less.
I'm normal just like you.
I'm scanning over old art to feel the emotions I once felt,
(is it possible to feel comfortable within anger?
Shall I not propose a better path for myself?)
Then again, pondering more, moving very less.
I'm normal just like you
By the afternoon my conscious mind has ran it's way
through my past experiences
always giving me the urge to ask questions
I wish I didn't know the answer too.
I'm normal just like you
Now the world has shut down
and I sit in my room, empty mind
mouthful of smoke.
I'm able to see it all clearly,
I'm normal, the things I indulge in? Maybe not.
Do you remember who you were before the world
told you who you should be?

Long since I once traveled,
and long since I started.
In joy, I reveled,
and in hate, I departed.

Most would agree,
But I have yet to see.
Just what it means to be,
To follow my beam with glee.

Shouldn't I have had a warning?
Surely one to keep me from going,
To where one keeps thoughts jarring.
No, that would have kept me from roaming.

Lights begin to fade,
And it grows a long bit of shade.
I stare into the darkness it made.
Knowing it'll swallow me as I wade.

"I've done well" my last thought.
The light wanes and eyes strain.
I blink and it all goes out, giving it all it's got.
I know it wasn't in vain.

No matter how you view it-
It's all lookings, each perspective.
You grow & you grow & you grow,
But you refuse to germinate.
Don't you know?
You must release your seedlings
If you hope for a root
To be planted.
Can't have too fragile of a barrier,
But neither too hard the shell.
Spread your wings
And do your thing,
Flaunt your laurels.

Id, cognism, ego.

Mind & thoughts, the vault, the passions & ambitions.

The springs, the streams, the rivers.
The atmosphere, the clouds, the rain.
The ocean, the lakes, the puddles.

Feeding into itself, again & again.

It's difficult to explain,
But easy to conceive of,
If you can imagine.

Don't let this dream I dream slip away, don't let it leave the brightest spotlight of my day.

Silent like a sundial in the sunshine,
I can only wish to claim you as mine.

I promise I'm just orbiting the sun in its natural RAYs.
You're a beacon of hope shining through the sunbeams today.

For the moments we share, reaching out to my friend,
in heart, mind, and soul, this bond can never end.

Let our bond be one of a kind,
special, just as we dream,
like a lighthouse searching with its brightest beam.

I'm here not to possess you,
just to bask in the warmth of your words and smile.
Your presence is like still waters on the sea across the miles.

In the beautiful colors of life, you're the most beautiful shade I've seen.
The laughter flows naturally and gently, like water rolling in a stream,

Talking like we are weaving a beautiful tapestry with our words.
Time, like wings that grow on the most beautiful bird.

In your presence, I only wish to exist  one day.
Please don't stop showing me that I am worth the stay.

Of all the time passing, of all the days apart,
keep me close to you, in your thoughts and in your heart.



Leanne ☀️

Mind goes blank
As if I were a mere plank
Pinching myself to check if everything's real
Even people I love dearly doesn't feel real
It all is so surreal
As if I can't feel

No imagination in mind
Just eyes left behind
Staring at the wall
As my attention was quick to fall
Everything I hear comes in and out of my ears
Sorry, but I'm not able to hear

Mind and reality just leaving me there
Yet, I can't tell if I even care
Feeling so numb till I can't feel people's warmth
It feels as if I'm in the pole of the north

Looking and touching people to check if they're a illusion or not
My space cells have returned into a knot
You're real, but I'm blinded behind a mask
And to remove it is all I ask
But then again, I forget that my space cells can no longer be heard
Space cells are always in a herd,
But now each piece is blocking my thoughts
Can't even form a proper sentence as my space cells block my desperate cries

My space cells are on
Mind in pure void
As my mind resets
The cycle comes back again
I can't speak
I can't think of any sentences
My space cells is blank.