Mind goes blank
As if I were a mere plank
Pinching myself to check if everything's real
Even people I love dearly doesn't feel real
It all is so surreal
As if I can't feel

No imagination in mind
Just eyes left behind
Staring at the wall
As my attention was quick to fall
Everything I hear comes in and out of my ears
Sorry, but I'm not able to hear

Mind and reality just leaving me there
Yet, I can't tell if I even care
Feeling so numb till I can't feel people's warmth
It feels as if I'm in the pole of the north

Looking and touching people to check if they're a illusion or not
My space cells have returned into a knot
You're real, but I'm blinded behind a mask
And to remove it is all I ask
But then again, I forget that my space cells can no longer be heard
Space cells are always in a herd,
But now each piece is blocking my thoughts
Can't even form a proper sentence as my space cells block my desperate cries

My space cells are on
Mind in pure void
As my mind resets
The cycle comes back again
I can't speak
I can't think of any sentences
My space cells is blank.

World is full of effects,
Effects are not puppets,
It causes impacts,
Which may detach.
Saying something is easy,
But for some it is fishy.
Trust is best,
But not as test.
Some words are essential,
But don't make as torrential!!

Sun is overhead, temperature is high.
All are tired and removed the tie.
Prayed for rain, but no gain.
It emptied a river, it emptied a lane.
A sudden thunder hits a cloud,
Over bumped cloud, burst aloud.
Drops of water hits the land,
Satisfaction fills the mind.
A sudden splash stopped the rain.
It ends the Summer Rain!

Here alone in my thoughts
The place where I find comfort
I toil around
Blissfully

Keenly remembering thoughts that make my mind race
Enjoying my own company with the voice that echoes in my brain
That is until suddenly, reality shows its face

Leisure turns into chase
I find my self ducking and dodging
Revisiting that which was a peaceful place
Dashing to happy thoughts, desperate to get away
Once a playground, now used forcefully as a dire escape

But the truth is you can’t outrun the truth
Nor can you hide
And so in that realization I fell on my knees
I prayed to the one who listens
Whose burden is light
Then I stood up, looked it right in the face, and in total terror it ran from me

Why did it cower?
Such a long chase just to run
Just then a tap on my shoulder..
There He stood towering behind me
“Well done my good and faithful son”

And to think I was alone in these thoughts

9-2-24   9:07pm

why are mornings
the worst part of the day

when your mind begins to trace
the quiet echoes of their absence

even at night
before drifting to sleep
while lying awake
with your thoughts going
a mile a minute


it's because the crickets remind me
of you
the still air
your books
your scent
your smile
your laugh
your lips

10-12-24

when do you stop crossing my mind
what day
what hour
what time

No mind left behind
No-one left deprived
Of love and joy and song
And knowing we belong

This has all happened before
And will all happen again
Learn from the past we are taught
But the same mistakes made, lessons ignored.
The hate of humanity stings
No common ground found
Yet brothers and sisters we are
Lives taken, persons slandered
Ideology trumps common sense
There is no love, no understanding
Centuries of hate, coveting what the other has
Demonizing beliefs because they are different
No filters, just hurtful words
No compassion, only disdain
No understanding, just demands
No helping, only greed
No forward-thinking, only the here-and-now
Humanity is doomed
Repeating the same mistakes
Unable to break the cycle
This has all happened before
And is happening again

Whirling of blades, clouds of dust
Screaming, suffering, litters of men
Crimson covered deck
Water of red flushing
Rinsing away the horrors of man
His uniform is ***** and wreaks
Dirt that isn’t dirt
He stumbles into the showers
Dazed in a trance, shock
Dropping his rifle, pistol falling to the ground
Standing under the cold rain
Dust and dirt, wash away
Water of crimson
Mud that isn’t mud
Guilt so heavy, he cannot breathe
Death all around him,
Yet he lives Why?
Brothers and sisters, gone
Yet he remains, why?
Guilt overwhelming
Pain, searing pain.
Yet he lives.
Unworthy, full of guilt
Crumped in the shower
Unworthy
He weeps for the fallen