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helena alexis Oct 2017
it’s 9:30pm on a
chilly autumn night
i step into the
passengers seat
of your car as you
start the engine

music blaring from
the speakers as the
thundering bass
vibrates through
the entire car
i couldn’t get a word
out because it was so loud

we stop at a red light
I turn to look at you
as the red light
hits your face
i wanted to take a picture
it looked so aesthetically
pleasing with your side profile
as the red light shined in your face
making your face bright red like
the blush on my face when people
ask me about you

your grip on the steering
is so strong that i can see
your veins popping out
you look so focused
when you drive
it’s ****
with only one hand
on the wheel
the other i wish
was gripping my thigh

late night drives
with you are
my favorite

- night drives
made it a little longer and detailed :)
Brandon Oct 2017
Trust is so easy to lose
On both sides, we give up easily
Patience is what our hearts need
But they won't teach you that
Details fly at Mach-4 over our heads
And when it is all said and done
Friendships end in a beautiful lie
Sailboats sink and bonds die
You built me up; we were brothers
How can you bring somebody so close to the light
Only to pile-drive them back into the darkness?
Friendships grow so fast and look as beautiful as a rose; sometimes they wither as fast as they grew. Not everything is permanent, but if you are blessed with a strong friendship that can get through anything, then you have true gold. :D
madilouhew Sep 2017
i use social media as an outlet for my emotions
the only problem is that
most of my mixed feelings develop because
of subtweets and
photos of girls who are not me
isnt it funny?
how the apps on our phones are
both the sickness and the cure
no
you will not go to heaven,
you will eternally reside in
your saved drafts on twitter
i dare you to post your most embarrassing
mine?
"do you ever look at the man you used to love
and wonder why on earth he doesnt cut his hair
and why he started wearing bermuda jorts"
its more embarrassing for him
my love life is now at my finger tips
do you know how many guys want to love
the girl they met on tinder who
hides behind her poetry
and uses harry potter as an escape mechanism?
none
i dared one to text me at midnght
between mispelled words and shots
he completed the phrase
i love .... euphamisms
like when your former self dies you call it
growing up instead of suicide
not my type
i cant stand when people cough in class
it reminds me of choking on
words
my words - the ones i say when i'm not supposed to
or the ones i should've said but never did
all of my pictures are captioned with
phrases and song lyrics that
i read in your voice
i wish that record wasn't broken
i wish i was a wizard
truly i do
with spells like
impedimenta (to slow down your attackers)
i wonder if it would slow down the voices in my head
i wonder if it could slow down you leaving
or my breathing (or lack thereof)
this wasn't meant to be emotional,
but with the world like this
how could you NOT cry
ive spent more nights in the bar bathroom
than i have in my own bed
its true how they say big events are
the most intimate
madi hahn - party of 1
or party of 761
if you count the followers who favorite my
tweets about dying
no one relates to happy poetry
why?
because no one is happy
because. no. one. is. happy.
its a facade - a mask, we hide behind
but then the clock strikes midnight
we're back daring stupid guys
to tell us **** about ourselves that we already know
we burn holes into screens trying to be relatable
we lose the best versions of ourselves
and
we are fine with it as long as
we recieve our fair share of attention

we deserve it
enjoy
Delta Swingline Sep 2017
Sept 24th, 2017

In the midnight hours, my neighbour is hosting a party. And I... was in my bedroom watching "The Walking Dead" on Netflix.

In the room next to mine, I hear shouting in the streets and out my window I see the flashing of lights.

2 cop cars on my block.

The night is not young, but look at all these young people in it.

I analyze the voices outside my window, as I watch 3 young boys gather in my driveway.

Wearing dark clothing, CHECK.
Group movement, CHECK.
Overuse of the word "****", CHECK.

And I am praying for them to leave my driveway and they do.

And I migrate to the next room, slightly open the window and listen for more of these people. It's too dark outside for me to see much but the colour of their hair, and the backpacks or purses the brought with them.

They are all gathering at one house, the cops are further down the street, so that all moved.

I used to hang out with the kid who lives at this house. My how things have changed.

Relax.

Go back to your show. And I did.

Later into the night, I hear through my headphones the shouting of a girl and I stop.

She and her what I assumed was her boyfriend just turned the corner and I slowly open my window.

I begin to analyze the situation.

Fighting teenage couple, Check
Probably intoxicated Check

She starts talking about some other guy.
He starts accusing her of cheating.
She gets in his face.
He gets in her face.

She says "I wouldn't do that because I ******* love you!" "And you're gonna make me walk home in the dark?!"

She gets in his face, he gets in her face....

BAM

She's on the ground.

He had forcefully shoved her into the pavement and she just...

Sits there.

In disbelief.

He says, "Yeah? HOW BOUT THAT!"

I don't know why it took so long to act, but I did.

Bolting into my kitchen, with my father up playing backgammon I tell him I just watched a guy shoe his supposed girlfriend in the road and he doesn't miss a beat.

He is out there in the middle of the night and he gets to that boy and I just stand in my living room, watching.

The windows on the first floor were closed so I couldn't hear a thing. But I could only pray that this boy did not carry a blade, or a gun, or the wrong words to my father's throat.

I ran up to my bedroom, grabbed my old cap gun and heard the boy say, "Hey man I don't hit my ******* woman!"

And I went downstair thinking to myself I don't know if my dad is sure to return to this house alive.

I just watched a girl suffer battery, I did not need to see my father die today.

And nobody can tell cap guns are fake when you're buzzed at 2 in the morning so yeah, I was scared.

But wait....

I see my father shake the boy's hand, give him a bro hug...

And send him off.

And when he came back into the house I hugged him and I wasn't exactly keen on letting go.

He told me that he had sent the boy in the opposite direction of his girlfriend.

It turns out she had already walked down the block by the time he had gotten outside.

It is 2:25 AM

After a talk about what happened, I went back to watching "The Walking Dead on Netflix".

And I can only hope that girl was not also walking dead.

My father is a good man.
Even after all that.

He still went back to play more backgammon.
My old man.
Sand Sep 2017
I'm sad all the time
Not for any reason, just because
I want to break down and cry
When I think of who I was
Vs who I am

I used to have dreams
Now I only crave sleep
I used to want to fly
Now I'm content with crawling
I was a person with a calling
Now I struggle to find a reason to get by
written about my many depressive episodes where it feels like I've been visited by a dementor and I'll never be cheerful again
anon Sep 2017
And I don't know why
But over and over
I've watched this show

Yet over and over
I never get tired of it

I know the jokes

I know when they're coming

But that doesn't stop me
From loving every minute

And call me crazy
But I almost wish
I could be like that

Acting

Acting like I'm so close
To everyone around

Acting like I always know
Exactly what to say

Acting like the bad
Gets better before the end
Of a thirty minute show

And I really want you
To see that I
Am thinking
About how

If I
Could only

Act
Like them

I could act
Like we were more
Than what we are

And I could act
That when I've had a bad day
I don't need a hug
To tell me it's okay

But I can't promise that to myself

Because I think I can act
I've always wanted to act

I want to be an actress

I want people
To remember my name

I want to be
That actress
That little girls
And even boys
Everywhere
See

And they want to be

Just

Like

Me

But I know
That I can't brush everything aside
To make room for a mirage
That everyone sees
But me

Inside
I know
That's all I am
When I act

A mirage
That I can't see

But there is still
That spark
That burns through the night
That tells me to act
To smile
And laugh
Like everything is peachy

So I wave
I smile
I grin a lot
And beg myself to act

And even though
I want to know
If I can make it or not
I'll never

No never

Let my dream rot
And
I'll never

No never

Act like everything
Is A-okay
Because it's not

Sometimes

And I'm rambling
I just want to tell you
At this hour of night
You were on my mind
And I missed you

So when the couple onscreen
Made up
And kissed
And hugged
And cheered

I just wished that was us

And in my rambling mind
I acted like
It really was us
Because that's how much
I want you
Even more
Than I want
To care for myself

Because I'm secondary
Sedentary
Sidelined
...
Sad

A sad girl
Who looks at a screen
And dreams of tomorrow

Hoping I can be
And we can be
And I won't need
To

Act

Anymore
anon Sep 2017
I was reading
When I realized
From this book

We aren't
What we say
We are

We are so much more
Than numbers
Numbers on a scale
On a ruler
On a tape measure

More than numbers
On our clothing

But that's what
Everyone
Defines us by

They say we are percentages

We are only one
In seven billion

Why should anything
Go right

We have something
Every one in five gets

Why should we feel special

They say we are standards
Like clear skinned
Tan
Gorgeous

And brains don't matter
As long as we are
Clear skinned
Tan
And gorgeous

They say we are dollar signs

That those who are poor
Should not even
Glance their way

And those who are rich
Are
Always
Stuck up
And ******

That the brand
That costs less to make
But is mass produced
And more expensive
Is better
Than the cheap stuff we all wear

They say we are the change
This world needs

But they don't mean it

They mean
They want us to try
But they won't let us get near
The power

But that's not what we are

We aren't numbers

We aren't percentages

We aren't standards

We aren't dollar signs

We are stories
Passed down from people
Who knew
What they wanted us to know

Like the time
My grandma accidentally knocked
Her favorite and only doll
Into the hole in her outhouse

Or the time we all sang
As one
In a happy melody

We are memories
From times
And lifetimes
Past

We are stars and planets
Distant yet
Present
Bodies
So elusive
Thereby so intriguing

The only thing
We really want
Is to fly in stardust
And dance in a moonbeam

We are dreams
That maybe won't come true
But will give us the best adventure
When we find out
How to live them out

We are heartbeats
That beat at night

We are bugs
In this garden of life
Because without us
There would be no point

We are flowers
That tickle your nose
On a warm spring day
When you reach down
To smell its fragrance

We are shoulders
To cry on

We are roads
To walk on

We are smiles and laughs

We are childhoods

We are balloons and bubbles

We are winters

We are springs

We are summers

And we are falls

We are the heat
And we are the cold

We are the change
We want to see
In an upside down world
Only we can change

We are people on the corner
Begging for some coins

We are souls
Thirsting for reprieve

We are hearts
Trying to love as much as we can

We are sadness
And we are joy

There are things
We can see
And things we can't

But after everything
Every word
We speak

We are so much more
Than what they tell us
Day after day

We are the world
And this world
Is ours
So take it from someone
Who has been invisible her entire life
Until they berated the silence
Out of her

In words
That changed to sorrows

And hits
That turned
To beauty

Because she can be beautiful
In this
Crazy
Twisted
Yet absolutely stunning
Life
anon Sep 2017
And I have to change

Nobody understands me
They don't get it
They don't try to
It's just all
Or
It's nothing

I give so much
And get so little
When I back off
They back off more
When I go forward
They step backward

I feel like I should quit
Maybe I should give up
Stop trying
Become who I was

Quiet
Embarrassed
Careful
Shy

Didn't say hello
Didn't speak her mind
Just let everyone else
Dictate my every thought
But that's not who I am

I've changed
                                        
                                               They've changed

They should understand
I'm a new girl

It should be better
Not worse

I should be respected
Not ridiculed

So then what's happening
What left me like this

So alone
So afraid

That every time I try to sleep
I end up crying
I end up hurt
And they don't bat an eye
Because I changed

I'm harsh
I'm different

If I tried I'd be better
I could be

Quiet
Careful
Shy
Embarrassed

And maybe they would notice
That the strongest
Are the weakest
But they don't

So by playing the weakest
I am the strongest
I am stronger than they know
Stronger than they will ever be
Stronger than they think I am

But
I'm not
I'm not strong
I'm weak
I cry at five am
To forget everything they've done

I scream when I'm alone
To try and get back
Hoping that

Maybe

Hopefully

They will understand
They will hear me

Scream
And
Cry

And they will understand
That I've changed
Kyle Dal Santo Sep 2017
The sweat soaked pillow keeps me awake
Insomnia is a disease
"You're not wasting it all,"
"you haven't wasted it here,"
You repeat them over and over
but the song doesn't catch
not even you believe it anymore
not even you think the joke is funny
not even you can fix this mess
A part of you wants to watch it burn
And if you could speak with sober you he'd agree
Getting clean is easy
staying clean is something else
And you can't hit bottom
if you can't get off the floor
I've become a mess of a dream
a series of moments that don't make sense
and always leave me confused.
These tired eyes have seen so much already
some days I wanna close them for good.

You know it's the right choice when it hurts
Each step away stings a hundred times
The higher you go, the slippery it gets
The crown is always heavy,
whether its gold or lead
one just looks prettier
both will sink you to the bottom,
both will dent your head
neither sets you free

Freedom lies within they say
but even freedom costs too much
I'm not living paycheck to paycheck,
I'm suffocating in between
drowning in an ocean of freedom
the world's a slave trade
chained to a roller coaster,
with no seat belt
the ride is broken
and you knew it getting on
And if you can't come up with the money?
don't you worry, they'll just charge you more lol
This world is a rabid dog
that forgot what you look like
And the key to your dreams
is tied to its collar.
And this is as good as it gets?
We're the lucky ones?
Jesus.
If there (is)was a god(s)
What ****** up sega game are they playing?
And why are you still a fan of it?
Kyle D.
Fritzi Melendez Sep 2017
I was never a bad kid.
I was always the goody two shoes.

Until the day I foolishly fell in love with you like I did.
And your fingerprints became my favorite tattoos.

Imprints all over my body I so gladly let it cover me like silk satin blankets.
We sneaked into places, locking doors with our special keys, revealing our skins like dark and ***** secrets we whisper in the night.

constantly letting the thrill of getting caught by our parents as we giggle late into the sea of stars, twinkling with every "I love you" we would say to each other every 5 minutes.
Even going to the extent of sneaking around confessing to each other about everything under the reflection of the moonlight.

Loving you made me feel so alive, so secure, so dangerous, so amazing, I began to see you in my future as if I suddenly got the chance to see through a crystal ball.
I began to plan where I would be and how much I would need, I even began to think of running away.

You don't realize how much it destroyed me when you said you couldn't do it anymore. I could feel myself spiraling back down in a lonely fall.
And now, here I am, covered in your fingerprint tattoos, and the thoughts of running away just to **** myself without a say.

I look in the mirror, revealing myself, wanting to rip my skin until I see a skeleton.
I lock myself in my room for fear that I'll break down in the places we snuck ourselves into.

Knowing you know all of my secrets too.
I used to be a goody two shoes.

And here I am, sitting on the mattress that started and broke this love,
Wishing I could smoke my lungs to charred black, filling my stomach with hard alcohol, drag the cold sharp metal across my entire body, and lay as I start the beginning of the end,
Only this time, it isn't you and I,

It's just me.
2:45AM and my mind is racing with the memories of you.
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