She stands hard as stone.
Now in a temporary home.

Too bad
Saint Valentine didn't weep
on the grave
you left in
heaven;

as you were
plucked
from the thousand poppies
of little lost girls
dressed in blue,
white, and
yellow.

and
even now, i know:
(that) you're not from here,
crying pink balloons
and little white
strings-

still attached to your eyes,
they
float right back up
and pop, when
they hit they sky,

and maybe,
maybe
it shows,
you just weren't built for
flying.

The tides of time flow beneath my feet
Rippling and flowing uncertainty
I am fish in the waters of constant change
Unpredictable ain't it strange

Will I be eaten by my disability?
Devoured by the shark like features of my own mind?
The stormy waves inside my heart
Will not just depart

The sea the tides of time
Hide my lost treasure sinking in the deep forever
Atlantis a lost city in a watery graveyard
Rusting away
rotten ships
Drowning wreckage of lost sailors

the waves hold a watery vigil
a siren like fate waits
For me with a lover who could save me
or cast me into the murky depths
Maybe the seas of time are all our tears combined
throughout time inside are all our aspirations we cast our nets for
and still we cry more than we catch
So the seas are maintained
For us to sail on...

I don't remember your sapphire eyes,
or the teasing trace of a grin procured
from my stupid pun that "gave you cancer."

When your forgotten face uttered those words
I thought it was a lie, our inside joke.
Little did I know that heart-wrenching truth.

I don't remember the way your chest rose
whenever I uttered your name in bed,
or the silken touch of your hand in mine.

Your words are just etches, shattered by time.
A single blink and you were gone, replaced
by someone, my love, and my life.

I don't remember the feelings I felt
nor the uplifting leap of my bowels
when you said I was yours, and you were mine.

your body is dead cold
but in my mind
it is warm and alive

Vinyl Chloride*

I try to soothe
my haggard mind
late at night,
I try to run from you,
because your damage
soaked all my bones
and all the happiness I owned.
Your name dug my grave
ahead of time,
I'm sorry, but you crossed a line;
You cannot trespass my heart,
you cannot say you loved me most
because when I bled in the dark,
your presence was a ghost.

From the mirror
Start my day in living fear

From a tear
I live the horror

Beauty is never near
The rose is but a scent

Never held close to breast
My mask covers all fears in my chest

I feel natures embrace in botanical gardens of grace
I smile when I see a babies face

Yet here I am ugly as ever
For the kiss I desire seems to be coming never.

Ugliness was the life of me
My grave stone now, as pretty as can be

The rain fell hard, spitting
on the hallowed granite wall.
It fell on her too, sitting
in her fatal fetal sprawl.

Her coat was torn, and her head hung low;
the rain stung her knees and eyes.
“What a surprise…” she whispered, slow
in her speech and ashen in her guise.

“I didn’t think I’d find your name…”
Her voice broke, though none can know
whether from pride or from shame.
“I guess you listened, when they told you to go.”

“You idiot! When you’re done, find
me. That’s what I said to-”
Another break; her throat constricted.
She barely breathed, “Why me? Why you?”

“I’m sorry,” she whispers.
“They sent you, but it’s all my fault.”
The rain reaches her lips, then,
yet those drops taste of salt.