When asked what they see in you
They'll say
Your smile is trustworthy
You give mom hugs
Your looks captivate
You excel in nearly everything
You exude confidence
You are perfect
But
There's things they don't know
Like, how you tell lies
How you sneak out for a fix
How you manipulate to get what you want
How you fight with the voices in your head
But
what can you say?
That girl in the mirror
The one that smiles a lot
The one whose heart is too big for her
The one who tries to make others happy
The one nobody can imagine sad or lonely
One stain
Two stain
Dropping like tears
When will they notice?
That it's your wrists
Crying for you

My room.
Filled with things that I adore.
Captured memories within frames.
Books filled with many lives I've lived,
and still yet to born.
The closed boxes in the corners, in the dark, (trying to be) forgotten
Of memories I can't fathom.

My room, my sanctuary.
Where the facade breaks.
Where tears falls freely.
Where I lie bare.
Free from lies and expectations.
With the wish of a love that is honest.


{ E.I }

If I told you about everything,
  all the truth kept locked inside
If I made you a promise that
  forbade me to lie
I'd tell you how ****** up I am,
  of the thoughts I keep at bay
I'd show you all the scars I've made,
  then I'd run away
If I couldn't hide myself behind
  my broken shades
There would be no point in living,
  my life driven by my shame

The smiling face often lies ,
No one knows , what it hides .
It is easier to curve your mouth ,
Then to let the pain come out .

The smiling face ,my mirror shows
Hides every stories which I know
I deceive others with my cheery facade
As they do the same , they too are flawed .

There are few true smiles ,
Hardly seen much awhile.
But they fade away fast ,
Because happiness do not last .

Skipping out the door
I'm happy I'm happy I'm happy
If I say it enough could it be more true?

I say it again
Because that's how I cope
But I never imagined I'd be so conflicted

lips taste of lies
skin smells of fear
cheeks flame with shame
eyes swell with sad tears

Oh please

Happiness is not a mantle for use
To hide from painful truths
Nor is it a protective shield
To use on a ****** battlefield

So let the fake seep out on occasion
To make room for real reactions
For then you will find the genuine kind
Will follow in orderly fashion

Temptation need not be confused with conviction.
Of course I feel the pull of wicked ways,
But the lure is not my Oddessey.
I could write a thousand sins,
Repent, inevitably repeat, and lie
I am ruled by a crooked rage
A poisoned oak in a forgotten wood
Rotting, to the grave I wear this facade.