I'm tangled inside and everything comes out like glass
I'm cutting inside.

The way you carelessly lose yourself, cuts me inside
And I forcefully tear my skin off
To show you I'm bleeding.
Can these pools of red speak louder than thunderous phrases?
I've tried.

You find yourself in dark places
Losing yourself to people who won't remember your name.
And you forget yourself
And
It
Tears
Me
Inside

In the worst kind of way.

I can't force you
Can tears? Can pleas of red and blue? Can whispers of adoration?
I've tried.

Does it come down like lightning - or do I sit in a deserted room...
Watching an hour glass, receiving postage with your name written on it.
Hearing about you from everyone but
you.
I've tried

And I'm the woman stuck in a painting
Trapped in an artifact
Scribbled on a drawing.
I can't speak!
Every single piece of me is lost in time, to trying, to trying..... Fading.

But, I saw you yesterday.
You smiled.
It felt like the beginning of something,
I realized
After all this time, maybe we can began again

It's like there's bitter in the sunshine
Looking forward to the days ahead
I'll learn, something worse or difficult
Can't release pressure on everything

Let the winter rain decide my sleeps
Half eyed, must warm up my lungs
Run to the bleeding point, I will stop
Where there's smoke, I'll rush there

Frozen birds in the street paths
Decaying without belief in heat
The beauty or fierce of winter
Snow flakes fall to cover reality

"Do you want to talk about it?"
You ask, seeing my impassive face.
It's been a while, and though I could
Remembering feels out of place.
Recollecting just makes it hurt.
Forming the words again is hard-
They're overused; now they sound curt.
In too many I've confided
To too many people I've told
All my sorry, deep, dark 'secrets'
Some warmed me when I was too cold.
I wish I could say more to you,
Explain why it's not escaping
Sometimes it's nice to not talk,
Than to break what I'm now shaping.

I can leave the world but I can not leave you
This will be my love stance just thru and thru
You are on petals of my heart like drop of dew
Your are that moment of love, I lost every clue

Who am I and where from I am all vanished
Please do not ask me what ever I just wished
Let me tell you I nourished you but I perished
Beauty burns and love is never extinguished

My love we will be streaks of light to remain
My heart is in beauty's chain again and again
The labor of love we will take and just maintain
Love is to walk with bare feet on difficult terrain

Col Muhammad Khalid Khan
Copyright 2016 Golden Glow

Writing is like falling in love; scary, stunning, difficult, amazing, big sweeping gestures, and falling from a plane... but it's worth it.

I'm learning how limited forever is in the space between two hearts.

You, I feel my heart swell when I hear your name. You're like my one night stand with happiness. You make me forget how completely cold it is. You remind me what beauty is and what hope feels like, soft and tangible, floating through the air like ribbon. You show me what it means to be alive, survive, swallow difficulty whole. I can feel your palms against my soul.

You, the illegitimate child of sadness and cigarette ashes, the tasteless poison that falls beneath my teeth. I can feel my heart sinking into the soft soil of you, planting itself in the wasteland where the bones of tiny things rest uneasy.  

Please, just let me sleep in peace for once.