Drunk with dreams,
           drowned in tears,
           dreadful glimpse
                 I can't look away.
Dim the lights
           with delicate fears
           and drop the vermillion piece.

Covered with blankets
saturated series,
like a champagne and the stars.

You didn't see me, yesterday
at the mall, outside
American Eagle, perched
over my phone, praying to God
that tomorrow's flame-filled tornados
and neon Nuclear nightmares didn't strike
like lotto tickets after 20 years salary wasted
after 20 years wasted in front of the bottom of cups
and the ends of wet joints -
No, something about today's different -
it's always darkest before the dawn
and it's always coldest before the crack,
sometimes I feel like letting go of you
and never looking back - I know
You must've figured the same
maybe I'm too wracked with disdain -

your car doesn't have
a cd player
which is a little unsettling
but i don't really mind

your hands remind
me of my dad's

i want to wear dresses
play taylor swift
spray myself in
citrusy perfume
and paint my eyelids
a shimmery pink

when i'm with you
i feel safe

i'm not convinced
that soulmates exist
but i am convinced that
we pick up people on
our way through life
and some of them just fit

some people are habit
can't remember a
time without them
and some people are the future
what could be instead of
what's always been

you're art in the foam on a cortado
you're a peach drenched in
heavy cream and limoncello
old overshirts and amaretto

you're champagne
and i'm the idiot
who intentionally
calls it "sham-pag-nee"

you can see through the
espresso stains on my
hands and arms right
down to freckles over scars

even if i slap myself to wipe
the pleasant look off my face
at the end of the day
you'll still think i'm cute

and when you say things
like that i start to feel all
gooey and underbaked
like a fallen cake with
cinnamon buttercream
melting down the sides
perfectly and
unabashedly flawed

i am selfish and afraid
and you don't seem to mind

so here's a toast to
letting someone new
into my life for
the first time
to allowing myself
to be vulnerable
and happy even if it
might be a mistake

because goodness knows
you're sweeter and softer
than i ever dreamed
someone could be

Led into bed
Whats the beef?
I need to take a leak

I don't want
You
Cushioned sheets

Fantasy and anticipation
Leaving you
Would be sane

Romanced into
****** depravity
I am drowning

Toward sleep
Unsure about
Tommorrow

Never can be
Loved beside a pool
Champagne

French pastries
Morning breeze
Leaning toward my Jeep

Forcing my hand
For a getaway drive
In the mountainous haven

Mulch
Clay
Pine stained air

Here I am
There you stand
Am I glad?

I am no more
than champagne
laughing

the champagne tastes bitter
my head swims and I think
maybe I need a bathing suit

maybe i'll never see god but the
breeze keeps touching my face
and the insects **** my blood
disease my legs and that's okay
because there's a part in me that has difficulty taking my watch off and there's a part in him that has difficulty taking his shoes off
despite the harmony I feel there's a head in the back of my own
that tells me that solitude would not suffice for such a shy creature that only wants warmth from another
there, there
there

With the glass of champagne
Still in your hand
You tell me that you're not afraid
Of death
Of dying
You ask me if I'm afraid
I sip the champagne
Death is something
I don't allow myself to think about
Finally I answer
No
No I'm not afraid of death
It's weird I haven't thought about it
Not before you
You look at me
Still holding the glass of champagne
You look good
You have some sort of magical eyes
Eyes that I'm not afraid to look into
You say
Most of us who have been feeling
Like we have been feeling
Are not afraid of death
Because somehow
We have already
Experienced it

Never have I heard someone
With a glass of champagne in their hand
Say something that intelligent
Something that life changing
I sip the champagne
And I smile