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Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2018
Will I ever be able to move forward?
Space grows more and more,
How can I accept that things
Cannot be as happy as before?

I adore the familiar memories
With greater depth than what's in front of me,
I cannot stop being in love with you
Though being around you stopped being easy.

When we are smiling life is simple,
We buzz with passion and energy,
When things become rough we start shedding blood
From wounds no other person can see.

We are in this hopeless place,
Light is fading with our contentment
We cannot conceal true feelings any longer,
Faces have betrayed inner resentment.

The battle has left our hearts scarred,
Constant war neither can win,
Always felt like I had no choice,
Our house a combat zone I'm fighting in.

Concrete beneath us cracking,
Inching us towards despair,
As words left unspoken crackle
Like fireworks in tense air.

Shield myself the best I can,
Buried under plans lost,
Thick oxygen too toxic to breathe,
My lungs seep red, I cough.

Forty ropes keeping me back,
I lack the tools to cut,
Blade of bravery long since broken,
That's the reason I stay in my rut.

I'm tired yet I incur no change,
I obey this overplayed routine,
Turn on the faucet, I cannot do it myself,
So I can wash my hands of you and be clean.

Hard to leave you behind completely,
You make it impossible to take the first step,
My veins flow with love only for you,
I will go far from here but never forget.
How do you say goodbye to the one thing you never thought you'd lose?
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2018
For every night spent wide awake
Crying, tossing, and turning because of you
For every time you decieved me
Tore my heart in two.

For making me participate in your game
And stringing my innocent self along
Until I was certain that lonely place
Was exactly where I belonged.

For every "I love you" I believed
Every other sweet word you said
For each compliment you truly meant
Every night spent in your bed.

For every last broken promise
For abusing my heart day after day
I am writing this to you for the love I wasted
For ******* me up in so many irreversible ways.
Because once people are broken in certain ways they can't ever be fixed...
Amanda Kay Burke Sep 2018
Maybe our relationship would have been better
If you had gone down to Idaho
Maybe you would not have changed into
This person I barely know

Maybe you would have been different inside
Willing to put up with me
Not this guy who is trying to mold
Me into the shape he wants me to be

Maybe you would still be madly in love
Maybe you would not have left me alone
Maybe you would still feel how
You did when you surprised me with that phone

You stayed, and this is how it worked out
This is the price I pay for needing you
I got exactly what I wished for but
Now I wish it hadn't come true
Be careful what you wish for... Aint that the truth?!
Alysia Marie Aug 2018
How beautiful it is

to have been released from those chains

that you’ve constricted my heart with

For all of those years

                               Alysia Marie 2018 ©
Amanda Kay Burke Aug 2018
I am broken but no longer sad
I only want what I lack
I will not sleep until I'm whole again
And love I had comes back

I am not the same pathetic girl
You used to console when blue
I found a friend in sweet silence
Solitude more enjoyable company than you
I'd rather be alone than around someone who makes me feel alone
LVQuigley Aug 2018
In my dreams I watch a girl be everything she ever wanted to be,

When I wake up I know that girl could never be me.
collette Jul 2018
Let the 
taste & smell
of the alcohol
possess you to
numb the pain
that he gave you.

  -He donates pain though.
Willow Jul 2018
I loved him with what was left of my heart.
I thought he cared about me, but he just used me.
I waited for him. I gave him so many chances because I believed he would change but after a year of waiting my heart knew that he left me and went away. The little left of my heart started to crush like the other pieces. But I just had a piece left and I guarded my heart for so long that my heart forgot what it was like to breathe.
Amanda Kay Burke Jul 2018
She thought a promise was a thing to be kept
To be made by those who meant it
Not discarded into empty night air
They fell apart like teenage romances do
One flicker, a lighter in a dark room
That was all. Nothing else.
She did not know much of young love and whiskey-induced lies
She was naive, still had faith in forever
The universe and wicked fate had different plans
Now she is irreversibly broken.
Under breath, she vows to never believe in a promise again.
Written 2-18-15
Johnson Jul 2018
Racing in my mind on endless plane
As the thoughts of you turn into a bittersweet dismay
The time we spent together and the feelings you awoke
Violently I toss and turn as I begin to lose all hope

And I shouldn’t obsess
But I cannot help but to hear
When her soothing voice resounds
I am forever to be drawn near

Whilst I sit on a shelf alone
Only to entertain the silence
Slowly it creeps into my mind
An everlasting ultraviolet

Though happy at last it was
Were the nights together with you
Now seem to be a hollow oblivion
As my world is filled with a mournful gloom

What I had for a short season
I can only begin to admit
I can’t help but to crumble
As I begin to reminisce
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