So used to the sorrow
One in the chamber
At all times
Cocked and ready
Barely standing
Hold steady
Stick the landing

Get back up and take another shot
Round after round
'Til it's burning hot
Slamming down to the ground
After hours, still not found

Digging up old memories
Pieces of the past
Hopefully the last

Page after page
Drop after drop
No rage
Still, make it stop
A balloon filling, ready to pop

Burn
Let it all go
Crumble to ashes
As it should have been
Years ago

What do you yearn?
A lesson to learn?
Letting it hide inside
Where your demons reside
They're living it up
While you're sitting by
Refusing to say goodbye

Wallin' alone
Breathing it in
The scent of misery
Of pain and relief
Stinging now, unforgiving
But stirring up forgotten brews
Only leaving clues

Burn it up
Break the glass
Let it all go
The past is the past
These pages are the last
Light it up
Get it out
Scatter the ashes
Heal the little slashes
And feed the flames until
The pain is long gone

Crawled my way out
From the depths of my own hell
I will scream and shout
That I'm still fighting
Because the pages and glass are gone
Doesn't mean it's over yet.

- Jay M
August 12th, 2020

There once was a paradise,
It shifted the paradim,
And then came a perasite,
It altered and paralyzed,

Hope turned to ash,
As they used thorns to stab,

The lonley gaze of the moon then pondered:
Is this, truly what you desire?

And so darkness ruled for a while,
As the light's dazzle dimmed,
But pretenders, liars and betrayers all rile,
As the hand of justice comes for them,

We do unto others, what others do unto us,
So life ruled, with a golden fist of truth,
Be used, abused, confused, difused and then refused,
As the ashes of that paradise in your mouth turns sour.

a million reminders
that I can't run away from this time
not this time
stuck in the rewind
I replay the day it all changed
Can't I just forget?
Until then --- in the ashes I remain

Fire makes me believe that feeling for a person is just like taking care of fire. The feelings are needed only while he/she is alive and they are of no use when the he/she is dead. Just like when the fire is alive there is need to protect it from wind/water but when it goes off i.e.,when it turns into ashes there is no need to protect it from anything.

Aye I fell from the stars
When I touched ground, it broke me
My folks gathered the pieces they can
It took me a while to piece it together

Then I went looking for the missing pieces,
In places so alien & people so insane.
I was reduced to ashes in the process
My friends gathered a handful of those ashes

And gave me courage
To rise up like a Phoenix.

I cannot sleep, my dear
You see, yesterday the sound
of waves crashing inside my
mind kept me up all night

I’ve been at war with my past,
and I failed to make peace with it

Now my bed is on fire and nothing
remains of my heart but the ashes;
I beg of you don’t ask me to stay
alive for another sleepless night

Lover, I’m weary
and I long to sleep