Everything I BUILD comes from the earth
Every creation's been CRAFTED with my hands
Thus everything I sow is  an ode to the HEAVENS
and I leave nothing but ashes on the GROUND

There was this
song

that says soulmates
were meant to know
each other before they even
meet

And I know
that moment came

When that sunlight hit

your face

One afternoon
that changed it all

The meaning of
forever

Remained

When words don't have
The capacity to bleed
Out what you feel and
Inhale what you need

You begin to lose
The narrative, the why
The who, the detective

You play the ploy
Of mind and then
You cannot even move
The bed

You will stay still
You'll crumble down
Until no one else
Creates a sound

Sometimes the fondness
Of what we feel inside
Can't fill the void
Tragedy tries to hide

For we seem to long
For suffering, masquerading
As if it's happiness
We seek

But the irony's what's
Funny, 'cause the turmoil
Boasts of self-righteous
Anger

Where it's always someone
Else who is
To blame

And it's always us who's
Done the sacrifices
For the game

It's all nothing
But neediness, preparing us
To be accepting of what we ultimately are

Savages.

She who dives
down the thorny road
in search for apothecary
to cure the woes

She who didn't
know what she would
find. Is apparently

lost

Then one day  
a Galahad would
come bump her toes

Irrevocable.

Inevitable, at least.

This blasts a loud boom of happenstance

Helpless ****** in the face of
the egoist

Both come to terms
and apparently
It has to be

It simply has to

be

Take me unpolished
Savor like it's your last
Meal
With all my ragged edges
And my ignorant drills

On how there's still
Hope as we live
And how my will will
Take me endlessly searching

For meaning and Oblivion
The life of uncertainty
Cause sometimes all we need
Is a mockingbird's tune

Something to hold onto
Concrete little words
Like, 'you'll do fine
You WILL get there

And dreams do come true

For I'm all but sane and safe
I knew nothing but taking chances
So, LIFE, take me as I am now
Roughed with malaise

I was
made
to
conquer life
to seek new creatures
to fail and
cry

I tried to think
I'm better
off
Just laying
down
and losing

hope
amour
the jest of it

But I just couldn't


RESIST


For this
is
how I was made
to live it all

until the


FIN

I don't feel...

like me

I don't see

the light at the end

of the tunnel. I usually 

do

Now it's just 

fog

I am awake.


Blood's rushing through
My eyes
They make me whole
I was in deep, deep


Deep slumber, but

The sunlight'***** me and
I'm going home

To New York
Where beasts are made
And fantasies come bearing

gifts and utter losses, but
it's exactly why we thrive

We **** heads and shout at peace
The traffic at 45th street
hot dog stands filled with dreams
Lonely writer in her sweats

Coffee shops and yoga pants
people who live in zombie land

But, don't you worry my dear
New York
I'm awake now
Lemme hear you roar

We're running as if
there's an end to this
a point where we say goodbye

When all it is is a cycle
we'll continue to rewrite

Learn, move on, don't redo
mistakes of dear old self
or you'll be left with nothing

but your own dreadful regrets

You open your eyes at dawn
with body glued to floor
getting up takes all might
"Can I still proceed to fight?"

One tumble to the side
Maybe
I'll go to loo and wee

Then you wonder what for
Life just seems an endless bore

You tried before, you really did
To make something, make someone feel
Or maybe you just tried to make you think
"At least I'm still someone who bleeds"

The hurt, the pain, they run so deep
Bandaids, the meds, and doctors' ****
Don't and cannot make amends
to this superficial, nonsensical graze

But why do I feel it
the body crumbles, I can't stand
or think aloud
I speak to them, these faceless masks
And no one hears me shout

"Somebody, someone!"
I feel to die
If I end it here, then I guess there's that

A fin to all these hopeless heartaches
WEAK mind and heart
I couldn't care less

And then a voice, a subtle one
That kid in me tells telling signs

It said, "Accept the sadness,
Embrace it.
There's hope for light if you seek it."

That child with endless possibilities
It looked at the world with awe
It took the hands of many
and helped others be whole
It didn't demand ransom,
no expectations from life
It thought I'd got so much in me
These all need to get out

Feels like It has figured it all out,
How sad that that *was me
Can I still see It? Can I still be free?






Yes, you see, I never left
I didn't get away
We can still rally the rounds and
paint the town red
We can scour the treasures of the land
And be pirates for a day
Because, my love, I never left
You just forgot me since that May

Don't put me in these
four corners
Labels you set on stone

You'll never really understand me
'til you pick me up
And take me home

I'm 5D in Imax
You'll need those special shades

And with it, you still won't get me
for I'm just that complex

I guess that's why there's an avenue
For a side of me you'll "know"

A little sneak peek, a preview
And that's all I'll care to show

I used to rush at everything
I rush at every line

Want it now, need it soon
The dates and time combine

I do despair when it doesn't come
As speedy, as accurately

My timeline, my needs!
Oh, my necessities!

But someone reminded me
of how Life isn't a fair game
If I don't enjoy the slow moments
I'd really lose with shame

Shame, because every moment,
every raindrop has its course
It takes a thousand hours to build the clouds
to bring up a push of sorts

Then that HO2 hits the ground
And as they say, "When it rains, it pours."
By then, with hope, you'll be less lost
and a little more than "found"

I knew I picked
this day to rest
For a part of it is true

Someday we'd all be
Something grand, someone
they'd rally to

It'll be a part of memory
a clip to look back to

I'd say, "Oh, how
we used to be so bland,
but hopelessly hopeful"

Then, smirking, I added,
With no doubt and remorse

"T'was because we knew
this day would come as NOW
when we hoped this as tomorrow."

To stumble by thousands
The legions of failure
following your footsteps
wherever you go

The shackles were given
before you could speak
and nothing is permanent
'til your will says it so

You follow a path
of nobody's design
No blueprint, not witnesses
'Til you're up in the limelight

But you chose this, you did
When the heavens were broken
and your wings were clipped

You said, "Father, I want to see
how I will live, imprint a legacy
how I can defy the odds on me
how my weak body can cause catastrophe

Anomaly in the midst of suburban
An island that floats by the edge of a plant
a little bee with that one solo wing

Confused you ask, "Why am I thee?"

And the answer reflects back,

"Because remember, you chose to be me."

Where there are ruins
there's hope for a new day

Where the crying mother lies
are children of power

The world revolves around a vicious cycle
But the people of Courage will continually

break

The barriers
The Opposition
The Unjust
and the Unruly

Because, and this doesn't need repeating,

Love and hope always win.

You walk the fiery
Depths of hell
The scorching crumbs
Of hardened fire

It burns your sole
The skin, the pain
And the tears
Fall down your eyes

They say the useless
Things but none
That'd tether your
Own will

For you will seek
The valleys and the mountains
Deep within

Time is effervescent
It's rigid and slow
A construct of
the mind and an ally
of the world.

Humans journey not through
time but within it. We're late
and early and we rally against it
always

Because we know it's eternal
and we are not

I used to feel that creeping sting,
that monstrous darkness along
the corridors of my deepest fears
But then I learned how I would be
if Peace has won within
Yes, there are uncertainties
but they come with my introspection
That life is just a path ahead
Moving on with no
discretion. No rally on time
and space; no rationality, just candor
Instead of being left behind, I plan to dominate
and conquer

When the crevices starts
To blend in
As the sun
Starts to rise

I see the light
In all the rubbles
Standing upon Rome
I seize the land

Phoenix's tale is
True at last
Prophecy from a
Thousand isles

They say she wins
The war, she brings
It home. With fire & fury
She's done it all