I arrived on a date unknown
my body lay cold, dead and alone,
I can't recall the events of how I fell,
I just am thankful I'm not in hell,

I don't know where I am, however,
The sky is a beautiful blue, and oh my, the weather,
but I cannot find another soul,
My chest tightens, and my heart feels like coal,

It's black as the night, but I'm basking in light,
I can't give up my fight,
and when the final tear is shed, I just might,
So instead I will live here in delight,

So If I can not a person among these oceans, stars, earth and snow,
Where did they all go? Oh my, what if they are below?

if I had a nickel for your spare thoughts,
you would be a nickel richer.
The thought you think so thoughtfully
folly is your reward.
Reward others,
and they will follow suit.
Suit, the garment you wear
it bessechingly pleads you
to empty your wallet.
Nay, do not pay attention
to the body,
but rather the mind.

If only

If only I could show you the way
If only I could follow my own advice
If only I knew what to say
If only I could let go of the vice

If only you were here with me
If only I could get there today
If only I could skip this mystery
If only I wasn't afraid

If only

If what we write are just rambles,
why do these letters mean so much?
The way a child is mesmerized by hanging leaves
reminds me of the simplicity
of putting an arm around each other.

If I worry enough,
will my woes fade into twilight?
glass shatters as the words leave my lips
trembling I lay down one last time
and accept the fate of my actions

If I run fast can I escape
from a past that I wish would kiss my ***?
I'm a different person than that time,
and for each subsequent revelation,
I learn my life is but a line

I'll keep the lights on in this place,
I'll sit here in the dark forever if its the case,
but I know you'll be back soon,
When I call we both know its a harpoon,

The walls will dry and crack,
this is where you bring me for a panic attack,
I have felt worthless for so long,
I have lost interest in any game or song,

No I think I'll retreat back to that room to be alone,
In there my voice is nothing but calm in its tone,
I know its not the place that I wish to stay,
but time and time again the world is too **** gray,

I watch it all move and twist about,
my insides screaming, my skin crawls and I want to shout,
But the camera's shutter moves to slow,
and the world slows down to a snail's flow,

I never talked about the way I felt
except in that room, where my heart could melt,
and words can flow there like a summer's breeze,
so I regress back to that room with ease,

I'm sorry to make you read anymore,
If the windows crack I need you to shut the door,
I don't bring anyone else here,
I've lived my whole life in fear,

I need to break out and make anew,
before my youth slows to a crawl, and then it's through
If I think anymore, my brain will implode,
like a black hole, it's another episode

Inside I scream, my skin crawls, I want to shout
**Please depression, just let me out

In due time,
these words I will refine.
Like a fine wine,
I will discover the line
to fit the rhyme.

But the time is not now.
That is okay.
To get there, improvement is how
I will look back on everything one day
To sit, laugh, and play.
Waste time away.

Recently, I've come to think I have ADD
Definitely, it's in the open, plain to see
As a child I found life hell,
The gears kept twisting, spouting some scandalous lies
My mind just raced no matter what,
Its true what they say, kids are mean, nasty, and cruel,
If I could go back, I'd say "know your heart is true",

I remember the Moose I saw, up in old Maine,
We were all in a cabin, I loved the soft rain,
Four generations, all as one,
Lived simply together, I remember our song,
We sung once when a fox poked up,
Out of the brush, we hushed and cooed out of sight,
And it stared with green eyes, and in there flared fiery fight,

I can remember the beach my favorite time,
I put my toes in cool sand, a feel that is sublime
The sand was so white,
It was just right for fireworks that starry night,
I can't imagine,
what would be better than warm water, Old Silver
is a beach where I would stay for meditation

Remembering the smell of the gross chemicals,
I sprayed at an abandoned night club, stomach full,
Of ***** I once stole,
from the cupboard where I wasn't supposed to go,
I could feel my soul,
When I climbed onto the roof, I could feel the weight,
When I sat on the edge, in front lay a beautiful city,
'
Recently, I've come to think I have ADD
Definitely, it's in the open, plain to see
And to this day I find life hell,
The gears kept twisting, spouting some scandalous lies
My mind still races no matter what,
Its true what they say, life is mean, nasty, and cruel,
If I could go back, I'd say "know your heart is true",

A miss a friend and he doesn't miss me,
A self-described narcissist, He moved to the other sea,
I'm not sure if he never thinks of me,
he does not message or call, He doesn't care at all
Best friends through high school, now in our twenties,
It's all so different, and I'm still stuck here,
without my own adventure,
without my best friend.

I felt the ground beneath me,
There was nothing at all,
I had nothing,
To stop the fall.

I could hear the shrieks,
of ghosts in time past,
I wonder how long,
they will last,

I could feel the breath of a slimy creature behind,
a conjure casted cat ran through my mind,
I thought of death and how my clock winds,
but alas, death leaves my contract left unsigned,

I opened my eyes, bright sun up above,
Startled, I jolted up with a buzz, gave my body a shove,
flowers on the ground spelled out love,
heat on my face I had nothing to speak of,

I took a long walk to understand,
what I thought was in the masterplan,
I sunk my toes in the dirt to feel the land,
I realized the plan isn't about my lifespan

Silence cannot heal
Break the void with your own voice
Now light your own path

Maybe if I move to mars,
I will find what I am looking for,
No loud noises, and no cars,
Your smile, three inches from the door,

Restless running through my mind
I have an insane thirst for sane thoughts
The hidden demons will shine,
Call the doctor, I'm in need of shots,

I've been fighting for so long,
uphill battles pave the way to light
Masks lie, what they say is wrong,
on the way I always have to fight

Loudly Siren sings her song
She whispers I don't belong

I've got friends with teeth broken at the gum line.
These guys can punch you so hard
you'll feel it when you think of it
I got friends who'll scare you outta your wits
the bits of stubs they call fingers,
are the most ginger thing.

These guys can **** you and not think twice
and they're the nicest people.
They know what's right and wrong.
and they're not afraid.

I am boundless
Caught between the void
My keys battered, my buttons stuck
I writhe in the space of not moving at all

I perch on the clouds and glass shimmers
from  the visage below
A dark bird in the sky mindless
Dreams, they float right by

We all feel the doom
The door creaked beyond.

You're like a rusted crown,
Like a unicorn on an island,
A mermaid on dry land,
and the golden apple of my life,
A creak in the floor,
and the name of the wind.

You're sitting across the table,
Even if I wanted to look away, I'm unable,
The thought of meeting you again fills me with joy,
My body is play dough, and my mind insanely coy,

I've searched for a long time for you,
On winter nights alone, with ice in my shoe
On spring days with friends, never wanting it to end,
I could search forever, my time well spent

For you're the only thing to make me happy,
You're familiar, nothing is off or ******,
You look less foreign than I originally conceived,
I thank the heavens I no longer need my grief,

Like I said you're right in front of my figure,
but when I reach out, you're 1000 times bigger,
There is no way we fit together,
but when you hold me your love is so tender,

You must be a mirage, oh Narcissus
You must be imagined, a sorceress,
There's an end to this game you play, oh give me a taste
It's staring me right in the face

I prayed for rain fall for 100 years and not a drop fell,
Through the kingdom grew our depleted wells,
Of knowledge and virtue, a gift so strong,
And the mystics preach their ageless songs,

We wither, wasting away under the dim lit fog,
They are to us as we to a dog,
The stars are blackened by wrath of gods,
the world is trapped in mother's jaws,

Her nature is that of the beast,
Her carnage crosses due east,
I pray for help on the beach,
Coals of hell will burn their feet,

So help your neighbor for he is you,
And believe in yourself and those around you,
and take care of anyone near the end,
Because sometimes we too are close to the bend,

You say I can win your heart with poetry?
Oh boy, that’s my only shot.
Let’s hope this **** is
sure to shine this chance

I can remember it all,
like it happened ten minutes ago.

I can see it all,
like a movie in my head.

I can feel that way,
every time I see you.

It’s like my heart flutters when you enter the room.
Like, your presence keeps my heart going in that moment.
Like, when you leave my heart goes with you.

You carry my heart.
That’s fine with me.
I’ve had it for too long.
It’s gotten too damaged and it needed repairs

But the best part is you put the pieces back that were missing,
and through some sort of altering arduous amazing alchemy,
you fused my heart back together.

I was to shy to confess at first,
But I’m pretty sure you were too.
Love is a funny thing,
But we fell face first,
and I’m glad it was with you.

You warm me up everytime my arms are wrapped around you,
The times when I can just hold you tight,
and feel like I never have to let go.
You lift me up like a pep-talk,
and just make everything better.
You, so so much for me that I could never express in any language,
and I want to thank you for that.

I don’t know what I would do without you by my side,
but like some cheesy Jesse Mcartney lyrics,
I don’t want another pretty face,
I don’t want just anyone to hold,
I don’t want my love to go to waste,
I want you and you’re beautiful soul.
Cheesy yes, but isn’t this poem cheesy?
I mean I’m cheesy, right?
My point is I want you and I love you,
and nothing is going to stop that,
My love.

You say you love for me is infinite,
So is mine,
Some infinities are bigger  than other infinities,
So love me infinite,
because Olive you,
I mean, I love you.

Achieve.

Progress.

Repeat.

Infinitely, this process must repeat.

You can't forcast your chances for success.

Maybe,

your break will come.

Maybe,

this just isn't for you.

But you can't give up,

you're a star.

Shuffle on, and play your cards well.

You might not get a second good hand.

The progressive flow of time
can never, ever unwind
don't think towards infinity
and degrade your own trinity

The title of alive is but a mask
finding your power is your true task
I look back and I realize now
why my depression screamed so loud

I wasn't true to myself
I could think of nothing, and nothing else
To regain my insanity, my dignity
Grow my resolve towards infinity

Why do I feel so alone?
And like my live is not sovereign, or my own?
Why do I waste my time typing these words away?
When my mind only bends and sways,
I find myself in dismay.

I feel trapped in a life unwanted,
Like I was rushed here and my time stunted,
there's a sea of consciousness none of us know,
It rests quietly, waiting patiently below.

I lost the ability to cry,
and in it's place I can fly,
I've held on to my depression,
and all I can feel is regression.

As a writer we all understand that need,
the urge inside you yearning to escape through
the written word
the word you inscribe with your thoughts
onto the paper of a phoenix, born anew
as each failed sentence crumbles it
to ash

There's a magnificence in your face
and a gentle underside that leans me inward
your cute curved lips tremble as I slide
my hand up your skirt

There's a flush of the cosmos on your face,
and the cosmos are vast
like our minds, the cosmos bends
to the will of energy

For everything that is final
there was a begininng so we must ask
where have we been?
the ramblings of madmen conduct
our code and ethics
but those still mad run among the streets
unnoticed, like a raven.

And as I think of the woes of the mother,
her blue marble is but a tear in the eye,
of a life infinitely larger
the will is not there
you must understand its not in my hands

I am trapped inside
and I will shut the windows tonight
But still as the rain hits the roof
I feel myself sliding,
slipping,
falling.

In a cage made of straw,
Walls cannot protect you,
To see your own fatal flaw,
Learn to smile through,

My lips hurt when I smile,
but you need to hide the space behind your face,
I'll resist until I am cold on the tile,
Revolving around the sun in this godforsaken place,

The sky is painted melancholy,
But you know no one else can see,
Still, you march on your way,
Back on your own into the sea,

The way you make me feel is indescribable.
It's like a
like a
like....
uh

All this time I've been worried
about the one thing that was perfect
Now I'm lost,
dazed,
confused.

Getting back to where I started,
that's probably the only way.
I've gotta to backwards,
that's okay.

If I stay here,
I'll rot away.

If stories could write themselves,
would any of us be here?

The universe watches itself,
through our eyes,
catching us in illusions,
Separation is but a guise,

I feel like a different person than back then,
But I'm changed and I don't know when,
my personality shifted but here I am,
I need to stick to my guns, and my plans,

Feet of stone, how can I step forward?
I can see the faint cracks creeping up the sides,
There's moss, been there a while,
I lift my leg,  but there is only pain,

Bright rays of light warm my face,
and far off I can see the ocean,
I want to go there, everything
feels too dry,

my voice is sand falling out of my mouth
and raining down onto my feet
the sand climbs higher
and still....
I cannot move my feet

We're two feet apart,
So much sun intensely,
Need you in my arms.

The second I look back,
I am filled with this feeling,
That I get every so often,
like when I think of those days,
the days I spent without a worry,
surrounded by my fellow delinquents,
We did not care,
We were there,
And we weren't going anywhere

But that was so long ago,
Today that is not so,
I have learned each goes their own way
Like a wave, we part ways
The fracture I feel won't escape
From the bricks that hold it in place

Teen spirit is underrated by all,
You and I, You'r dad and uncle Paul,
We all remember what it was like,
youth is valued for this exact reason
We all worship this way despite
one day, we return to dust
Maybe then, I'll feel this way too.

Look inside and see
a complete circus full of mystery
let's examine all the silly ways
to enjoy this quaint, little place

There's a trapeze artist,
leaping for faith
Will he make it,
or fall on his face?

There's the freak show
a group of the obscene
Will they be rejected by us all
or revered, and answer the call?

There's the man shot out of a canonball,
who flies high through the sky
he's got a head start,
but will he too fall and die?

There's the animal tamer,
one of the toughest of all
constantly at war,
will he be the one to score?

And then the Ringmaster,
the man behind the curtain
he has us all fooled,
of that, I am certain

I'm going up the hill again,
The top is my destination,
Confronted with fleeting dreams of mesmerization,
The sky is clear but it feels like rain, soil gone too,
down the drain,

I've been here before, I can feel it,
Imprints of my feet, the ground steals it,
The sky is a blue hue I do not recognize
The stars look more like flies

I approach the top and something feels off,
Stress, anxiety, and vertigo on top,
I inhale but no relief comes,
Gravity is not for friends or fun,

I get the top and I can see the sky,
For a moment I feel like I can fly,
But I realize my deja vu the lack of serenity,
I'm at the bottom in an endless journey,

On my way I see
A pin-***** perimeter
For infinity

I fell like there's more words in the English language
than there are brain cells
in my decrepit body
what do you call
the feeling of longing
for something that you never
have seen or expirienced in you whole life?

Why do people strive to be prosperous,
but not help those in need?
I think too much,
for my own good,
and I should let
my poisions do their job,
and take me out of this world
and into Nirvana

but a madman can spout all he wants
and his words mean nothing
we are all saying the same words
thinking we are unique in our presentation,
but this has all been done before
we are another act to the play
that hides the truth in
the rafters and very soon
curtain call will destroy us all

A million words like raindrops
forgotten regrets leak from the rooftop
of a home you knew long ago,
when the wind blew a different way,
and the stars cast a different gaze

There is a broken plate on the floor,
and her hat still hangs on the back
of that door, you wish you could walk through
but the air holds you back, a static attack
Nothing more with no one to talk to

A cold chill approaches again,
You pull up your collar with familiar disdain

There's a key
a mystery in the sea
the one place
it's available for me

The waves are shallow
So barren and dead
The weight of it all
compresses my head

I can't see
my eyes turn me to jelly
I can't hear
the silence is strangely calm

the key can help now
and unlock my mind
I can breathe again
the key saves my life

Mind yourself
conceive what to say and do
have manners
Now, the key is inside you

I want you to play me like a guitar
Let your song be heard through me and
play my chords ever so gently,
as if you were brushing your hair
Tune my strings to your liking, for I live for you.
And let these words rain true in song, eternalized,
You and I

Take me on the road in your tattered case
Play me to get by, but don’t worry about my feelings
I’ll be just fine.
Memorize every hickey on my neck, every knick, and every fret.
But don’t fret over me.
Feel the smooth waxed skin I wear, decorated with stickers
to let the whole world know I belong to you,
because the way your hands caress me
tells me that you are mine.

Together we make the perfect song
A blissful and tragic story, that was meant to be
We’ll stay on this road forever, You and I

Cause girl, what we got is something to sing about

Out by the Strange Creek a little drunk,
I built a tower of stone, an imaginary throne,
I pondered of power and sat on a stump,
The moon hung like an old friend from up above,

There were many around, laughing and happy,
A few on the guitar sounded a little sappy,
Tents dotted the river, and I dipped my tows in the sand,
The stars up above illuminated the camp but not the bands,

Too many drugs made there way around,
back in the woods everyone gathered around a stage,
and jammed the music, they blazed,
for themselves, their future, but mostly the present,
Their bodies swayed, in a daze,

Acid, ****, liquor and E
Oh boy, it was a party,
but the last bit of my sober self,
turned inwards and the whole of me felt,
the seven chakras flowing through me,
connecting me to infinity,

We partied for three days, acid babies littered the place,
We drank for our mistakes, and listened to The Machine,
The wall flowing through me,
We freed our bodies, and our souls to the void,
On the last night we were over joyed,
But now that I'm leaving I feel it slipping away

My crown chakra back into the haze,
My mind's eye back into a cage,
My throat chakra back underneath,
My heart chakra feels only grief,
My solar plexus can't handle a nexus,
My sacral is fine though, trust me,
But my roots,

They don't even trust me

I see it in the distance,
While the air dampens on my neck,
I cannot find how to capture
My
Attention.

My eyes wander
My ears fall asleep
And for the first time
I see no one is alone
No one is together

The scent of grass squints my eyes
And I lay my head back
Green feathers beneath my head
Peace begets my loneliness

Eyes still shut I make music
With no sound at all,
I resist the urge
To take the fall

The thing about this life
is that it's so fast I see it in slow motion
the things I get caught up on
offer infinite possibilites
for the concepts inside my head
the rythm of the earth
can match to each of us
a part of the cycle
we are all living in

If you fly high as a dragon
you can see the city below
What man cannot see, you can
the view is a unique sight,
something to behold.

Take your time, and enjoy what little
we all have
and while it is infitly unimportant
it is just as important to do it
because that  is what makes
this world
Ours.

Twilight sets for rise,
The sun beckons, pride, and joy,
But still, new days set,

Hey there friend,
let's bend
to the will of the people.
Crane our necks
and get on our knees
this is the price of Freedom
you better go run with the bees
cause like them, you're running out of time.
But don'be be fooled by the tricks of a mime
nothing is silent
and everything shines.
Nothing is black and white
there is so much gray, despite
all of the reasons there shouldn't
in another world there wouldn't.
So enjoy what you got
give up what you sought,
cause my friend life is short
in any way shape or sort.

If I'm a failure
When does success supersede?
My heart is broken

If I could wish upon  star
there would be a gleaming hope
you'd notice me
After all the time spent
After all the minutes went
I never forgave
I never forgot

There's gotta be
some kind of universe where
we can at least be friends
Just a little part of a little space and time
you and I are more than strangers

Starry Night

We've known your gaze for too long
you reach out to us, whispers in the wind
you can hear our hearts as Earth breathes
We can taste your lips when the air is crisp

and we know your comfort when we turn to the
moon

I've got to ask myself
Is it real?
You love me, and I
haven't told you the deal
When I think, I sigh
just keep spinnin' the wheel

It's been a minute
or a milenia
Who's to tell
my mind of mania

It's an awkward answer
to your question within
Just like a lancer
I have to win