Starry Night

We've known your gaze for too long
you reach out to us, whispers in the wind
you can hear our hearts as Earth breathes
We can taste your lips when the air is crisp

and we know your comfort when we turn to the
moon

I'd like to say the blue sky is what will load
I wave hello to the thought of you following
me down this long yellow and tattered brick road
a different path sprouts up and I can hear the calling
"Everything you think is a lie in disguise"
A low voice cackles, a shadow face emerges, time slows
"Use your eyes to realize real lies"
Dread is a comfort wrapped around my skin when the wind blows

I feel like death is what is inside a black hole
not only literally, I look around the luminous room,
the walls fall down, all that I can see is green bubbly mold
I'll try to sweep boulders, and shimmy over with the broom
Before the shadow disappears, 100 years have made me old
The walls are back, but nothing holds the fume

It accompanies my conscious self
fumes relax the soul, and but the Subconscious to sleep
I'll box up the memories and store them on the shelf
From the beach to this **** town they run my emotions to deep
sometimes your mind has to die to heal yourself
lovers cross at the wrong point in time, a sea of life is why I weep
******* emotions give me the ******* blues

I wonder if sociopaths need the laughing gas
because to continue on my heart has become blue

Step by step
don't get close to the ledge
down the yellow road its kept
You heart is on the edge

Jump and you can reach
know what seek
all and each
its so low and meek

It's a mess you can't clean
It's behind the cracked mask
the face of a fiend
To clean is your only task
but everything falls apart at the seams

Waiting for a phone call I tap my foot to the drum
of one thousand humming birds
Marijuana is needed but I think I have some,
smoke a joint, just feelin' like a ****

I need to run, escape, that's how I will heal,
but I find myself binded in place, stuck,
So I bow and just keep spinnin' the wheel
But one of these days I won't give a ****

I'll pack my bags, spread my wings and fly
I'll work up courage and leave you behind
I know I'm an *******, but I''ll try and leave with a friendly goodbye
If I keep thinking I'm gonna lose my god ****** mind

There's two wolfs that claw at my ventricles, my veins, even testicles
they fight for every part of me, and are made from each other
A pitless void, I just seek fun, adventure and thrills,
Ying and Yang, they're me, but they're both brothers

If I follow the path I'm on,
My life is cheated like a con,
I fear the future is not bright,
I fear for my own gentle light,

My fight is thick with fears of doubt,
No, I don't want the easy way out,
I need to stay true to myself,
My needs aren't for anyone else,

I'm drowning inside myself, see?
This catastrophe is complete now,
There is no need to keep reading,
... or writing.

I left the light on
when I first went with you to the store
the aroma of dough and your perfume
was as angelic as when we ate food
while we lounged around on the internet
in your wicked grimy basement.

I chased you around Wilton
and I swear there was nothing wilted in that town
all because of you.
We explored the grass field in front of the school,
and dumpster dived behind

We walked hand in hand
two miles to the waterfall
just to realize that we couldn’t actually swim there

You ate your chicken pressed up against cucumbers
I ate everything with gallons of ketchup
You ate your food chopped into small bites with sandwich meat
and I find that absolutely adorable

She’s as small, yet beautiful

As the budding spring leaves

She’s as radient and strong

As a summer day

She’s as colorful and calm

As the leaves falling off the autumn trees

Her hairs as white, and her mood as soft

As a snowflake falling on the ground

She's Born budding

And She Dies Soft

I see words like sigils
Cast on a page of white
twenty-six ciphers can make
every thought you choose to take

They can do good or harm
By and for all of the people
Together collected cool, calm,'

but lethal

If I were a flower
you would be the lawn mower
If I were the sun,
you would be a storm
If I were an ant
you would be the cruel hand
of a child.

But if you were a drop of rain
I would be the leaf that welcomes you
in the dry summer heat.
If you were lost
I would be the star
who guides you to safety.

I have an arsenal of thoughts
but only a handful of mediums
to express all of these words
in a particular order
with a peculiar fashion

Expression is the only thing that curbs
depression in the gray sky of life
To record is to remember
to write is to make history
So write on,
it's all that is left when we pass on

I haven't written in a while,
it's killing me, let it flow out,
can never let the tar be filling me,
Man, I can't even push out a smile,
not even for a little while,

I wish life was as easy as the movies,
Ace the test, get the job, it got through to me,
Can't let the matrix occupy my brain no more,
It's not paying rent or it duties,

I've got to bite the bullet and keep the finger's a'chuggin
I'm not gonna stop my INFP game, keep them sluggin'
I'm not here to impress a soul, just leave a mark
not many people reach out, the void is stark,

I'm not trying to sound preachy, but I always do
I see the faults within me, I hope you see yours too
I've got to move forward with some things in my way,
**** tomorrow, today is the day,

What's the thing you've been avoiding because familiarity,
breeds within you a false sense of clarity,
don't get caught in the rat trap of your matrix,
Focus, and fix your way out of this.