I am boundless
Caught between the void
My keys battered, my buttons stuck
I writhe in the space of not moving at all

I perch on the clouds and glass shimmers
from  the visage below
A dark bird in the sky mindless
Dreams, they float right by

We all feel the doom
The door creaked beyond.

returned to the same desk,
the same grindstone, the same thoughts,
cyclical patterns of thought and action,
but which comes first?

the will slips, the cracks widen,
and it all floods in, easier to understand,
caught within the same ropes,
you spun from woes of a broken past,

and they were meant to help climb out,
but the grease that bounds the threads,
cannot be grasped by those unresolved,
to the reality they crave most,

A quarter used to be a bag of chips,
days eye level with countertops,
2000 is a big number
when 5 is all you know,
maybe there's a one on the end like those twin towers,
and the falling man on the TV,

Or maybe it was blow up furniture in the shed with the hose on,
and a neighbor with a hose too,
He was kind, a big kid I didn't know,
Shrek plays on the TV, Only superstars
break the mold,

Mold in the basement,
dirt floor and the smell of summer fills my lungs
but then I'm on the bed with her, and The people's elbow
makes me laugh,
but feeling something else too, something
shameful like what's on the TV, on the TV there are those dead babies,

Dead people from the towers, I hear someone say
at the store, and I have a bag of chips, but my pants are down,
She te telling me to just watch wrestling and relax, but I just
want to know why,

Why am I 25 now but the hose and the wrestling, and the people, all those people on the TV, the twin dead ones,
it makes 25 feel like more
than just a bag of chips

If stories could write themselves,
would any of us be here?

The universe watches itself,
through our eyes,
catching us in illusions,
Separation is but a guise,

I feel like a different person than back then,
But I'm changed and I don't know when,
my personality shifted but here I am,
I need to stick to my guns, and my plans,

A miss a friend and he doesn't miss me,
A self-described narcissist, He moved to the other sea,
I'm not sure if he never thinks of me,
he does not message or call, He doesn't care at all
Best friends through high school, now in our twenties,
It's all so different, and I'm still stuck here,
without my own adventure,
without my best friend.

On my way I see
A pin-***** perimeter
For infinity

I'm going up the hill again,
The top is my destination,
Confronted with fleeting dreams of mesmerization,
The sky is clear but it feels like rain, soil gone too,
down the drain,

I've been here before, I can feel it,
Imprints of my feet, the ground steals it,
The sky is a blue hue I do not recognize
The stars look more like flies

I approach the top and something feels off,
Stress, anxiety, and vertigo on top,
I inhale but no relief comes,
Gravity is not for friends or fun,

I get the top and I can see the sky,
For a moment I feel like I can fly,
But I realize my deja vu the lack of serenity,
I'm at the bottom in an endless journey,