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 Feb 2018
Anya
Two years
Two ******* years
They always told me to stay away from liars and people who hide the truth
But I never thought I’d have to stay away from you

You were so much more than what you think
You shut out the good moments and remember the bad
Clinging to the times when everything went wrong
It’s backwards but it was all you thought you had

You blame amnesia and the doctors who ******* up
You blame the parents who didn’t watch you grow up
The ones who didn’t love your flaws
And the people who did you wrong

But now two ******* years
They gave you two ******* years
And yeah it’s not my business to know
But when you said “best friends” I thought you’d grown
Learned to trust at least some people
Learned to confront your problems and find comfort in others
I was wrong

You confide in yourself and give up on life
“**** the world”, you say with no care for anything
You drink away the pain then feel the burning ache in your throat
Running miles until your heart stops and the world goes black
Always saying “if I cut them off they won’t feel the pain when I’m gone”

You’ve been there
You’ve felt that pain of losing someone you love
So maybe you’re trying to protect us-protect me
But maybe you’re being selfish and can’t see
Just how much you mean and who you could be

Two ******* years
They go by in a flash
You’re thinking of the people you’ve left
And you’re wishing you had someone to share in your death
You’re all alone and the worlds gone cold
Because you turned everyone down and pushed us away
Made everything die and fade to grey

I mean, thank god for your sister, right?
Because she knows what’s going and couldn’t give any less *****
I guess she’s like you after all
Faking a smile and pretending everything’s okay
Even though when she gets home she can’t hide the pain

Maybe you’re hoping someone will write you a memoir
You had so many admirers anyhow
People who loved you and you couldn’t see
People who would give up the world to be successful by your side
But two ******* years means that won’t happen
Not that you would have liked that anyway

But who cares, right?
You never wanted love, compassion
So why should anyone care?
Why should anyone give a **** that you're breathing your last breath?

It’s *******
The idea that no one should
That you should leave this world feeling alone
That two ******* years from now you’re supposed to be gone
Complete and absolute *******

You’re hoping no one cares
Hoping you can disappear
And not see anyone’s tears
But two ******* years will pass
And you’ll hear the cries from the ones who couldn’t last
The whole way
its amazing how majority of my poetry is based on our friendship and the story of your life rather than my experiences.
 Feb 2018
Rebel Heart
One wall is full of magnificent posters
Of a little girl's future dreams.
The other painted over with vibrant art.
One wall is a diary oozing with words
Of every unwritten song and unsaid thought
The other a painted map of all the adventures
That await her if she follows her heart.
...
Yet these posters cover up gaping holes
The paint covers up the scars
The words cover up the pain
The map her deep flaws
...
The room was never meant to be seen
By anyone else but the girl
Who lived in fear of the demons
Before realizing she
Was the only monster
Living under her own bed.
...
And no matter what she did
To cover up her empty walls,
The suffering
  Would forever
    Be locked
     Within them
...
Her room forever emptier
Than her heart
.
Excerpts from a long published poem by the same name...
 Feb 2018
Patience
I think it will take me a long time to ever truly trust someone again.

Including myself.
 Feb 2018
Vale Luna
(read forward, then backward, line by line)

I ran.
Not knowing what else to do
There was so much blood on my hands
It was mine
The kitchen knife
Caught in my chest
Guilt
Consumed by
Fear
I was heightened by
Adrenaline
But running on
Wasn’t enough
While trying to stay calm,
Losing control
It was me that would end up
Dead. Because
He was
In front of me
The whole time
It was too late
Trapped
I found myself
Locked in chains
My fate was
Death.
Forward: from the victims perspective.
Backward: from the murderers perspective.

This TOOK ME FOREVER TO WRITE
 Feb 2018
nim
lie after lie
tell 'em I'm fine
lie after lie
and they start to
believe

lie after lie
and you start
to believe
lie after lie
but the blade
couldn't be tricked

lie after lie,
tell them you're fine
lie after lie,
glass is now
in your veins
lie after lie,
you tell yourself
"That's not deep enough."

lie after lie
rose petals on the floor
lie after lie
one poem burned down
lie after lie
your blue eyes staring
at the hole where
lie before lie
my heart used to be

lie after lie
and soon
you don't know,
lie after lie,
you're not fine

lie after lie,
and soon,
lie after lie,
it's not
a lie.
 Feb 2018
Kartikeya Jain
"She was an
unusual dresser.
Every night,
she wore bruises
on her heart,
love on her lips,
pain in her eyes,
and ink on her fingers.
They called her poetry."
 Feb 2018
Rebel Heart
Because the spaces between
These broken lines
Sketched onto my skin
           and the
Spaces within these ugly scars
Cut into my back
There lies a million words
Left unsaid and shattered
Tucked inside of a chest
Buried into the folds
In the darkest corners
Of my messed up mind
...
Oh how I wish
I could give you the key
To unlock it all
...
Yet my fate
Remains sealed
Inside my clenched hands
And within my quivering lips
...
(Part(s) of a long poem later used as an inspiration for a novel by RH... Btw still passive-aggressively avoiding a dear friend of mine although I'm sure that's exactly what she wants me to do...- If you read this well secrets are ****** up, your scars don't define you, and you deserve the world as much as you say I do- Happy Writing! ~BM)

(Front Page 2/14/2018)
 Feb 2018
Masako
If it were to only rest upon my hands and breathe through my life..
to posses what others view when they smile fondly on their past
instead..
I feel velvet scars rising
forming into reminders;
my dreams slept were only nightmares
my dreams awake were only mirrors to night
the only one to hold me was my dead teddy bear
cold, stale, mildewed from my tears
suicide preached upon, with words of parents
A happy childhood is all I asked for..
 Feb 2018
Kirsten Claire
Written on my hands
Are all the secrets I wish to tell you
But my hands remain in clenched fists
So tight the ink begins to seep
 Feb 2018
Rebel Heart
The stars only rise
To fall when no one sees
The ones you miss
A lost echo in the breeze

The memories left
Like old jeans are frayed
The photographs you carry
A burden when they fade
(Another lyric wall quote ~BM)

(Front Page 2/14/2018)
 Feb 2018
Rebel Heart
She always saw the best in those
Who were the worst for her heart
She let those in who didn't deserve
To see the broken pieces of her art
(An old gem from the infamous lyric wall because I'm too drained to post anything else.. Enjoy~ BM)

(Front Page 2/13/2018)
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