BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY, THIS WILL BRING THE PERFECT PLAY OF EMOTIONS AND CAPTIVATIONS AND SURPRISING REACTIONS


I’ll have a car, a ride, a pony, stallion HAHA or not.
Altis.
Grey. Just the right size actually. Shouldn’t actually matter, but it does if you think about it.
Confused,
maybe a little since it’s out of a comfort zone.
Exciting,
I felt the chills on my neck just now lol.
I know I talk easy but my mind will be racing for sure.
I’ll think about the mood, the vibe, think about where things will be and why.
I’ll wonder why I’m there for sure.
And I’ll be a little good kinda scared.
But I will be growing, no matter.
That night will be evidence.

Too early to tell?
I wouldn’t know.
But I know I’ll have tried to get at least 1 friend to go. Or two.
Probably should invite them now.
But what if I DO lone wolf it?
She’ll get to see me being outgoing and not awkward with people. She’ll see me as fun to be with knowing he can get out of his skin to make something of himself where no one judged who he was
and where he came from
or how he spoke
and how he dressed.
Oh, thinking about it, it’s what I really want. Exploration, adventure, people.
Money won’t be an issue,
but if I’ll need a tissue
or buy a drink for you.

Which I don’t mind too.

Maybe you’d be thinking the same.
I’ve known this human as a real being for only 4 hours max. All that online talk, sure we get each other, sure we connect, but it’s the night where I become something to you for sure.
You’ll become something for me maybe, even.
Hopefully, and fearfully.

But tonight the night will surely be a new scene,
so on our guard we’ll be.
I don’t know if you do that,
and you don’t know if I go to these.
I don’t know anything about you
I’m scared.
I feel like I should.
But nonetheless,
It’s a process I want to be on.

I’ll think a dozen things
or two,
and overthink what I actually want to do.
I’ll roll with the punches and play along,
and I actually had a thought,
maybe even sing you a song.
This is too early to tell.
I’m usually like this, sorry. I attach myself to people easily,
and maybe this is good or bad,
Because we will connect and be on the same wavelength and talk freely without judgement from the lookers and nobodies.

...

And we might even flirt a little, arm touching, smiling wildly, trusting.
“That beer will do fine right about now :)”
“You sure you’re not gonna get drunk like the last time?”
“Trust me, of all the nights, this is one I want to be sober on. Plus, this won't be our last time :)”

...


But it just means that I’m exposed.
And my strength will dwindle, you see.
For you are as exactly in the position to react to my actions and expressions that will drive me towards exaggeration and exasperation, or painful expectations and realizations, as accordingly.
I cannot be defenseless.
There is so much of me that needs work on
And I know if you are everything I pictured you to be, then you are one of the only things that can destroy me.
So who really knows how the night will end?
Will a romantic be satisfied
or continue to be deprived of something he felt,
could be real…
...for a moment at least?
Will he ever so gracefully take hold and do away with it so beautifully
or will he be struck down once again,
ever so dutifully?

Well, we’ll know for sure, won’t we?

Pull me close,
In fact closer than most.
Probably all of me, the nearest to all of you,
I'll be jealous, it's me over... those

Don't leave me, even though I'm always with you,
You see, without you i am empty and no more free
A dark space with light I'll never see
But around your shoulders, that's where I'm meant to be

Know that I feel you, as much inches of you, there is of me too
The mole on your shoulder, that bump's still blue
I'll hide your imperfections, they won't have a clue
Having me will never feel like déjà vu

Trust everything in me
As you keep in me what you value, I'll make sure, effortlessly
Just reach and see, i'll feel your hand slowly
It'll be normal and comfy, that's how you'll know, lovingly

I'll catch that stain of coffee
Let me freeze, i'll stay warm where you'll be
Rest your back, I'll feel your nape on this tree
You don't need to speak when you're with me

I don't mind how you notice others
I know all places your elbow's been, the tear made by your brother
No one else will have our stories, see
That fact will always keep me happy
Don't you worry

And when day turns to sleep,
Throw me by your side, or even at your feet
I won't always feel your love, be your shape
But I'm home with you anyway,
And love is made of faith

Hi

It seems like you no longer need me

That's okay, I know I no longer fit. You've outgrown me, worn me out, and I do look tired.

We've gone on many adventures you see, to places we thought we'd never reach, heights we'd never climb, views that were only sublime

Were you tired along the way? I bet you were. Tell me, don't be shy. We've come a very long way, you and I

But don't worry about me if you'd like a change. Another may carry you longer, and even farther, you may even feel you've grown stronger.

You'd go many paths and crossroads, rivers and seas, upon many paths right through the trees

And that's okay, because I've served my purpose after all, when you jumped and stomped and walked and ran, i took the fall

But if you want to go on adventures again, I'll be there, in all the places you'd expect me to be. They won't be the same, you may not feel the originality

You may feel bored with it,
And all it would be is familiar
Never feeling the same kind of free

But look, see, I have no holes in me,
I look tired but there's still durability
If you fuss and twitch, i may still mold to your feet

Because you were meant to go the distance
And i was meant to adjust
But that's just the way it is
And can never be the way it was.

If it takes 11 messages
To get 10 "seens"
Picking up your phone 9 times
Talking to 8 friends
With 7 telling you to forget it
But 6 thoughts run in your head
And 5 are pretty good ones
I'd think 4 words
Regret it maybe 3 times
But after 2 deep breaths
I'd take that 1 good chance
And say,

"Maybe we could work"

And by "we," I meant the 2 of us.
We'll count to 3, and the  we'll be
Happier and louder than the 4th of July.
Our hands meet; ten fingers become 5,
After 6, the sky is bleak
But we have 7 more hours to sleep.

By 8, we have coffee and conversation
And you leave me after 9 train stations
I ride alone for 10 more minutes
You've already left 11 new messages
I called you and you pick up at the 12th ring

I said, "come home," and I hear you crying

So maybe we go round gain
Here and there, tying knots and ends
For if a countdown ever would be
I wish the best for you and me

Because numbers are there
So things may seem fair
But truth is, no matter the stage
It is with you I'd like to age

This is fine, for me at least
Nothing can harm me, I'm stable by the table seat
And life goes on, stories be told
Whatever happens we'll grow old
I hope

Here's a crazy thought,
An answer none of us would have sought
It's strange, you always saw so little of me
I didn't feel as well, so worthy

But hopefully, I'll be strong for you
See, you'll arrive and depart, I wish, with me there too
Because choices you have, that will always be plenty
I'll have your whole life, as much as I can carry

I don't care, it will be a little clingy
But let me know, I'll fall where you want me
Just know I'll gather winds and rains
And sweets and pains, with you i'll remain

On the mountain lay me for awhile
I'll be heavy, but I'll be with you for miles
On a boat out at sea, go diving without me
When you return, I'll be the same, still happily

Of course, life will be lighter without weight on your shoulders
But I swear I'll keep up and even make you better
Don't forget me, cuts and tears and all
We'll brave the summer, winter, spring, fall

You're a nomad when all's been said at least
And adventure stokes the fire while keeping your peace
I'll be whatever you need, my cup is yours to fill
And even when you toss me aside, I'll cry, but still be at your will

Because your shoulder's my sunrise
The sunset, and the moon and sun
I'll protect your back from dangers and promises undone
At the end of the day, I'll lay waiting till you wake
For another hour, year, or decade,
I promise I will stay