Sometimes I wonder,
Do they even know how it feels?

To be surrounded,

To be trapped,

By walls of lies believed to be true?

To always long for a freedom you can never have?

A freedom you tasted once,
And now you forever crave?

Like a drug, it’s addictive
Eternally imprinted in your brain

Do they even know the feeling,
Of wishing something would never end

But being aware it’ll end eventually
So you savor each time like it’s your last?

And despite the fact you savored the sweetness as much as possible
It still wasn’t enough

Because in the end you still missed it
You still wanted more

You wanted to feel that free and happy again
And it burns to know you’ll never get it back

So you’ll keep longing for a freedom you’ll never again have

And it’s all their fault

It’s because of their lies
Because of their need to control you
It’s because they can take away anything you have—
Without a valid cause

Oh aren’t you so sick of the lies?
Because I am.

Crazy, how the seasons will change
But my life won’t

It felt like winter was gonna last forever
It felt like it should’ve lasted forever

Like the world shouldn’t have moved on from this dreadful point of my life
Like the summer and spring shouldn’t come during bad times
Like good weather deserves good spirits

Now i'm back to a time where things should be great
Yet I feel as bad as I did in the winter

Last summer was amazing,
Felt like this weather was the promise of happiness and warmth

Yet still, even though the flowers have began to bloom—
the cold of the winter remains

At least for me it does

I took the blade
Sharp and deadly

I pressed it to my skin,
sliced it across
Over and over

Till the blood pooled out my arm
Leaving a deep long crater

The skin gone, cut off
Showing the pale white under-skin beneath

As I bled more than I ever knew possible

The moon left me a note last night,
Tucked in a cloud, soft and white.
It whispered, “Why rush through the sky?
Even stars take their time to shine.”

I’ve tried,
I’ve cried,

I’ve lived through dark times

I’ve felt myself fade
From other people’s lives

I’ve watched people cry
I’ve watched people suffer

I’ve rotted in my bed
Wishing I had tried harder

I’ve wished
I’ve begged

For a shoulder I can cry on,–

I’ve changed
I’ve chosen

To be a shoulder to cry on