I loved you, beyond the grasp of words.
The paint brush I used to describe you
Was weak and withering
Needed re-configuring
Cause you were boundless

I loved you dangerously
Even when you hurt me
Scars and scabs
Nightmares in history
Bleeding insanity
Across the canvass of time.

I loved you even when you hated me.
The outsider, with ***** ideas
The spoken artist broken heart with this
Dark daring dreams
To help heal all human beings
When you were already so happy
Being subdued by propaganda

I loved your expressions
Your poetry, your sketches
Your philosophy and science
Your rejection of dogmas
When you had the strength
To reject them.

I loved your filth
Desire and rage
Lustful urges
***** thoughts
*******

Even when you beat me down
Like a trailer trash wife
When you reeked of hatred
Stunk of consumerism and racism
I still loved you

Even when I hated you
For breaking my heart
With all the bombs
And violence
When you turned my hopes to ash
When I watched you flash past
And finally come back
From dark ages to enlightenment
And back around again and again
I still loved you

I still love you

It is not your room.
The wound is not
your wound,
so you do not feel
as if the pain is real

but the blood is factual.
The loss is actual.
The costs are varied.
Each face
wears sorrow’s
sick slick scars.

I can see them
from where you are.
Why can’t you?

My scream to you is only a whisper
Why bother when all you do is hit her
Your mama says you’re in trouble, mister
That’s no way to treat a lady!

Baby, what’s the duct tape for?
What of this rope you bought at the store?
That better not be what I think it’s for
That’s no way to treat a lady!

I’m not in the mood for a hit
Not to be battered or bit
Baby, you’re so full of ****
That’s no way to treat a lady!

An accident? She’s dead!
And your palms are stained crimson red
And I can see her body under your bed!
That’s no way to treat a lady.

Flowers planted after dark
Just as you wished, you left your mark
Doesn’t matter how loud I bark
That’s just how you treat your lady.

There she lies, under the ground
Unable to be seen, not to be found
The gardener won’t even make a sound
She knows that’s how you treat your lady.

Dig up the roots, there she lies
Bones broken at the ties
Skull crushed, her demise
We’ve found your lady!

Flowers growing from her bones
Dug out by mindless drones
Results of your uncontrolled hormones
We’ve found your lady.

destroy me, push me down, hurt me

kick me, kick me until i go numb

make me cry with your words, don't show mercy, lash at me

hit me straight on my face, hit again on the other cheek, hit so hard that my brains tremble

tell me how useless i am, tell me how stupid i am, tell me how much more insignificant i am

don't let me sleep, don't let me be, don't let me do anything

**** me slowly with your cruelty, torture the life out of me with your abuse

comment on everything i do and all my faults and get mad at me every time i do something wrong

always remind me of who i am and what my place is, but don't remember my identity, instead shred it into bits and throw it away, so that i will be nothing but your toy

make hearing my name only a reminder that i'll never hear it the same way again

make my name a symbol for a blind dog that is beaten even after it stops whimpering

don't warn me, punish me straightaway, do whatever you want to me without asking

tie me to the wall with chains and make me perform tricks like a dog

because i am your pet

why are you so enchanted by the light?
why do you keep on sticking to bright streetlamps
when strolling
through cold, quiet streets
bare of any living being?

(with their fingers crossed behind their backs
and knives hidden in their smiles)
the creatures mischievously sneaking around in the dark
are given the benefit
of spotting you right away

they easily observe you
(and see through your hesitant footsteps and shivering arms)
from a safe distance
and wait
for the chance to pounce

what is it
that makes you so
terrified
of the darkness?

is it because of the stories your mother told you
when you were a wee, little thing?
when you could barely understand the words coming out of her mouth?
when all you could believe in were your mother's words?

"Remember this: always walk under the streetlights, so the monsters don't chase you. They're terribly frightened by the light."

child,
do not be afraid
of slipping in the darkness.
do not be afraid
of what kind of unknown being lurks inside.
do not be afraid
of breathing the same air as your predators.

why not blend with them
as they search through their surroundings
all terribly confused
as to where their prey was
as you observe
(and see through their hesitant eyes and shivering backs)
from the shadows
and wait
for the chance to pounce?

/ after all,
creatures of the dark
rarely expect the attack
coming from their own side,
don't they? /

It's hard to write happy things
When I'm feeling sad
It's hard to talk and "walk the walk"
When I'm feeling mad

Most of the songs I write
Are when I'm angry or depressed
And you don't have to read them
If it makes you feel upset

I'd hate to make my readers feel
The worthlessness and pain that I often do
It's hard to know if my works are "bad"
So just read a line or two

And give it a like if you really do,
Don't like it out of pity
Because it will tempt me to continue
With little or no mercy

So please do not hurt yourself
By reading something violent
And make it even worse
By keeping complete silence

There is no need to do that
So read at your peril
Because whether I am angry or sad
'Tis the work of a devil