So used to the sorrow
One in the chamber
At all times
Cocked and ready
Barely standing
Hold steady
Stick the landing

Get back up and take another shot
Round after round
'Til it's burning hot
Slamming down to the ground
After hours, still not found

Digging up old memories
Pieces of the past
Hopefully the last

Page after page
Drop after drop
No rage
Still, make it stop
A balloon filling, ready to pop

Burn
Let it all go
Crumble to ashes
As it should have been
Years ago

What do you yearn?
A lesson to learn?
Letting it hide inside
Where your demons reside
They're living it up
While you're sitting by
Refusing to say goodbye

Wallin' alone
Breathing it in
The scent of misery
Of pain and relief
Stinging now, unforgiving
But stirring up forgotten brews
Only leaving clues

Burn it up
Break the glass
Let it all go
The past is the past
These pages are the last
Light it up
Get it out
Scatter the ashes
Heal the little slashes
And feed the flames until
The pain is long gone

Crawled my way out
From the depths of my own hell
I will scream and shout
That I'm still fighting
Because the pages and glass are gone
Doesn't mean it's over yet.

- Jay M
August 12th, 2020

For a moment--
            
                         I was sad that he left me.


But then I realized--


                          It was I who left him.

My best verses are never written
Nor do anyone gets to listen
They dance in my mind
every word properly bind

The words conjuring the bliss
the smallest sentences
with deepest meanings

disappear when I take out my pen

and start over a blank sheet
with one word staring back
Composed and forgotten

In dark abyss
absence of words in canvas
Cannot remake the very rhyme
The painted masterpiece
Stolen away as
Reality strikes again.

a man wonders why
like a cage a single meaning is trapped
to a symbol of many faces
like moonshine being time for a romance
for it is also when the predators hunt,
a man wonders why like a fox the world is written
and like a rabbit we fall for its snares
people ignore to see our symbol of peace
murdering a wee lil worm,
how is it a prison is meant to keep things locked inside
when its actually keeping people out of our reach
how religion breaks war
and love fosters hate
why are we blinded like bats
and why are we deafer than snakes.

What's the meaning of life to you they ask?
The meaning of life to me is forgetting about the past.
Whatever mistakes you have made
Learn from them and let them fade.
Whatever you dream to do
do whatever it takes for it to come true.
For you are in control of your life
So take the wheel and go for a ride.
The only person who can criticize you is you,
so never let anyone come in between the things only you can do.

What do you say?
Should I keep trying my luck at the human condition?
I'm struggling to believe the human condition is for all of us;
Because of the way we humans are hardwired to think and judge,
and as a result, the way we have constructed meanings and standards in our societies,
many of us are left with an appalling serving of the human condition,
with little other than pain, misery, and humiliation on our plates

So what do you say?
Should I abandon the human condition and maybe seek more transcendental avenues of living?
(it's not as exciting as it sounds because I'm compelled to consider it)
Or, do you think the human condition can still accommodate for the joys of every one of us?