I'm drowning
In the American Dream.
Everything here
Is not what it seems.

Is it your dream
To be shot on the street?
Is it your dream
To not be able to breathe?

This is what we are.
This is where we are.
This is some American Dream.

So stand with me,
Raise our hands.
"Don't shoot."
We say.
But what does that do?

As long as the guilty walk free,
And the innocent can't be,
We are stuck in this American Dream.

Please get me out.
Take me away.
This is a nightmare.
Hold your breath,
And raise up your hands,
And pray to God
That man won't shoot.
Is this all we can do?


m.c.c.

They told us we must go
It's the opportunity of a lifetime
They said
But how do they know?
Do you see them here?
Among the empty stares
And crowded stairs
Do you see them here?

So why do we all feel
Like we brought them?
They're here with us
In our minds
Filled with equations and Latin translations
And these people
They are there too, aren't they?
Seeping into our thoughts

We don't want them there,
But are they the only reason we're here?
We tell ourselves we came
To get away from them
But I think we all came
To bring them with us
To show that even though we are gone
There is where we belong.

We are all out of place
So out of place, in fact,
That we fit together perfectly
Like a puzzle
Each piece a part of a different picture
But shaped to fit each other
Redefined cookie-cutter children
That's what we are

The dough of our minds
Has already been sliced
But everyone tries their best to be different
So they paint pretty pictures
To display what is inside
You are holding my brush
What do you see?
Redefine me.


m.c.c.

This place is already tainted with memories of you
I've only been in this place for a few weeks
But already, I find it hard to breath
Thoughts of you come to me
Just walking around
On this hallowed ground

And I imagine life with you
Life without you
How different those two things really are
These few acres
Of tear-stained concrete
Would be empty
If I did not know
That you too
Were walking on these grounds
Somewhere
If not beside me
Then near me

Each blade of grass
Each flower
Each fallen leaf
Each ripple in Each puddle
I see around this old place
Is now infected with the virus of your heart
Never again to recover
Only to slowly wilt
Until nothing is left to see
And it's only you and me


m.c.c.

If you love the leaves
I am winter

If you're full of songs
I am silence

If you love the rain
I am the desert

If you are the good
I am the evil

If you are beautiful
What am I?

m.c.c.

I'm not so sure
I believe in fairytales anymore
They're so far-fetched,
Finely etched
Into tombstones of color

My mother used to tell me
I'd be loved someday
But that could never be
I mean, just look at me

Sitting here
All alone
Constantly checking my phone
Knowing he didn't call
Knowing he never will
But wanting it so bad, it's almost real

Prince Charming took one look
At my face full of grief
And decided that was enough to leave

He found another girl,
I'm sure of it.
How could he not?
He's so full of it
Telling girls he's the only one
Their fairytale has finally begun

And they believe it too
Until it ends of course
He gets bored
And leaves
Or finds someone better
And leaves

Either way
Prince Charming ran away
And I'm left with
No hopes
No dreams
Not even fairytales
To put me to sleep.


m.c.c.

I understand
I understand why you chose her
Just look and you’ll see
She’s so much more than me

She has everything
Hair so soft
And eyes so blue
And all she wants is you

So go
Find your way
Leave me here
And never turn away
From that girl who can’t take her sapphire blue
Eyes off of you

I’ll be okay
I’ll be alright
Lying in my bed
Alone at night

Sure, I’ll think of you
But I’ll always know
I did something right
Letting you go.


m.c.c.

I wish I could hate him
I wish he could fill me with a fiery desire
To eat his heart out,
Chew it up
And spit it to the ground

But that was last year
That was the boy who I always hated
The one I convinced myself I loved
Because I hated him so strongly

This boy is kind
He is good to me
And everyone else too
So when he doesn’t reply
Or makes me feel unwanted
I don’t even have it in me to feel angry

But I am angry,
Just not at him
Because how could I ever be?
He is the boy to put his arm around his mother
While picking up his brother
And holding him close

But that anger is still there
And I struggle every day
To find someone to be angry at,
But at the end of each day
The only person I’m left with
Is me.

So when a few ask
Why I don’t love myself
I tell them, “It is because I’m in love.”

Usually when I state this fact
They look confused and turn away
But if they were to listen a bit longer
They would hear me say,
“But he doesn’t love me.”

m.c.c.

What am I ever to do

When even my Plan B
Does not choose me?

Shall I be left alone
To face the world
One step ahead the rest?

Or shall I take a step back
And trail behind
Watching others’ happiness?

He, oh he
Was my Plan B,
But even he
Hurt me.

So what am I ever to do?
(I wish I could say this is new)
Me, I don’t have a clue…

m.c.c.