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Maguna Dec 2020
he wasn't in the right headspace
he wasn't in the wonted circumstance

it happened neither occasionally, but on numerous occasions

however, his surrounding be approaching and expecting his so-called tough shoulders..

..to be cried on, to be leaned on or to be the place they can dwell in for some considerable time.

his heart was made of gold, but it felt like a block of ice.

nodded his head; means acceptance.
tossed a yes; means a welcome.
painted a genuine smile; means he's all about to listen.

he was there for people, and he will always be there.

but where are the people pace their footsteps out while 911 numbers were pressed on his life's phone button?

nought. zero calls back. all dead. stone deaf.

that's how we live in, being a living buttress to people as in fact people won't ever spend their seconds to be your place to go.

aside from the bitter truth,

survive.
keep breathing. x
Amanda Kay Burke Dec 2020
At the bottom
This empty hole I've dug inside myself

Waiting to be saved

Catching a glimpse of light above

Those glimpses are getting fewer
Far between

I think about the idiots who told me
"It's mind over matter"

I had a mind
To lift above matter
Ever since I lost it the matter is too much to bear
Really feeling this one right now
Saïda Boūzazy Dec 2020
After midnight, she starts thinking
She is wondering whether she is really fulfilling hers mission on earth or not!
What is the core of existing!
-Love,  hate,  then leaving-
she is obsessed by different feellings !
- fear,  love,  and hate -
She can't stop thinking about everything
-She is weirdos , -
Every idea takes a place on her own mind
After midnight , that idea starts poisoning her thoughts slowly
- like the moon  affecting us-
she stresses herself  asking about the real meaning of life.
As  for her , life becomes meaningless.
spacewtchhh Dec 2020
I love oceans.
I would sit on the shore with massive waves hitting this body of mine
With no one to see and no one to be with.

My lighthouse tried to fill in and gleam,
Yet I swerve,
Yet I ran away from the luminescence it gave.

I leap into the ocean and drown myself into the water,
And within I struggle
Within I suffocate under.

I am terrified of oceans
Yet I feel secure
Yet I could feel the warmth it provides inside.
J Nov 2020
when I'm mad, there are no mess-ups
but one
I'm trying to explain
why do I resent
the fact
you
don't see me trying

J
it's hard to listen when I'm angry
I don't know you-?
You don't know me.
You know my stories and my ****** reactions
"I get that"
no, you don't
you don't get me
no one does
I'm losing myself
while you find yourself
I feel I can't say anything anymore
I can't say **** about you
I can't talk about my ex
I get shunned
you twist my words around
make it into something it's not
I try my hardest to stay on a good track
but God
sometimes
I wanna rip my arm open
but that's hard
hard because everyone else around me does
and I'm trying to prove
I'm stronger than that
I try to be stronger
laughing
laughing
laughing
God, shut up.
shut up.
I laugh and laugh but it isn't funny.
but if I'm not funny
you won't love me

quiet.

we haven't talked just listen to your music

is that wrong?
is it?
is it bad that that's the only way that things come out of my mouth?
they whisper
I turn it up
they scream,
I blare
is it wrong that the voices don't stop

my mind is something you will never understand
but it's okay
I don't either
whatever makes
me
happy
you hate?
I know you have weird moods
so do i
so I guess I can't say much
sometimes J
just sometimes.
i

my whole life I've been shut down,
now by you too
I love you
but
the more we talk
the more that
I question your stories about
cheating and
being toxic
I doubt that
changed for me

everyone knows about your cps cases
and your grandfather

okay so I tell you things no one knows

but you tell me things everyone knows

quiet

silence
...
it's always had my back
but anyways
that shouldn't matter.

I'll just stay quiet.

**NOT MINE, MADE BY MY GIRLFRIEND, I JUST WROTE IT DOWN AS SHE WAS TALKING
my girlfriend read this to me. she was upset about something I did(I know what I did, I was telling her about my ex again and she had every right to be ******* about it) So while she was talking and reading it, I typed it out so that I could think about it. We're on the phone, still, even after she's read it as if nothing happened. She thought that we would break up over it, that we would break up because she believed those words were things to break up for. I'm shaking a little bit. A lot of bit. She said "I knew that it would upset you." I'm trying very hard not to act upset. I think that maybe I really am the toxic one. I've been working on something for her recently, about how much I love her, but that doesn't mean much, does it? I think maybe I'm stupid. I think maybe I should be the one to stay quiet. For what it's worth, I'm sorry Sydney.
Mathieu Nov 2020
Let us go a little mad!
If we try real hard I know we can!
Let’s not worry about what people think,
We’ll go bananas in a blink!

No more scrolling for what we need,
Or cave into another drink.
All that liquid dulls the senses.
When you’re insane the world is endless!

Let’s say what we really think,
Not be afraid of things hard to admit.
Degrade yourself for what, for whom?
Your ****** beautiful, you know it too!

Yes it’s fear that holds you back,
Your past, your story, you’re better than that.
Who you want to be,  that is your truth
And I’m crazy enough to believe in you!

Am I mad we so easily replace
One with another during a Netflix break?
If chilling is devaluing the human spirit,
How empty are we to need **** to fill it?

I’m not getting really riled,
So let’s go bon voyage awhile,
And not judge all the locals there,
You know, they too feel love and fear?

Now we’re lost in a nice direction,
We’ll stop using ‘hate’ in every sentence
I hate paedophiles and domestic violence
I don’t hate using an iPhone 7

Now we’re madly - I feel a-brewing,
Opinions based on fact reviewing
When emotions feel a little ticking,
Don’t buy that (blipping blip) they’re spewing.

Congrats! We’re seeping deep into nuts.
We COULD argue about funding cuts,
Or join the game of hide and seek with homeless/addicts/single mums.
OH! Using our imagination’s fun!

But in our little game of mad, we whisper
SHHH! 14 eyes will see the picture
No name, no phone, just disappear
I must be bonkers, a secret system!?

A game for friends and friends of friends
What a wonderful world when off your meds
When everyone is kept in a tidy pile
We can jump and stomp, kick leaves for miles!

Now I’m getting upset it’s blowing
The wind picked up and the rains are flowing
The little pile was so connected
They fight, the leaves for the nicest spot -  but in the end they fall, they wither and then they rot.

Some are pretty, some provide shade
But this pile seems to body shame.
If each think spring is unique to them,
the part they play will fall away.

I know that I’m most certainly deranged.
Some of these leaves, want weeds to spray.
All this trunk and extended roots,
They think this won’t affect them too?

I’ve had enough fun for today
Playing mad is a scary game
I need a joint, beer, some time to pray
Some pills, some sleep and don’t ask again.
I will redo this one! Reflecting as I drive over three days from north to south of Australia - the craziness of the landscape, the size, the emptiness - and yes, the kangaroo’s, camel’s and heat stroke.

It appeared to me that the key to understanding our reality is that we would have to be mad to believe it. Both the physical world - and the social structures - seem completely inconceivably mad. And maybe the people who understand, construct and command  it are, in fact, mad.
Masha Yurkevich Nov 2020

I'm twisting, turning,
sweating, burning.
What's in my mind is so disturbing.
The world is falling,
piece
by
piece.
People are mad like angry beasts.
I open my eyes but the remain closed,
showing me this world that is
out of control.
I pry my eyes but the refuse,
exposing this world of issues.
I don't want to see this;
its far too ugly.
People are mad, everything is ******.
I want to wake up from this nightmare;
where is the other world, where?
But I don't wake up, not now, not ever.
This is the nightmare we are
living together.


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