It’s been a while, but I’ve figured out
Why my life seems so different now.
Working on being your new fixation
In a costume of my own creation.

I know I’m not who I used to be,
I’m used to being shut down,
Silenced,
Ooh, their words were violent,
And I ended up someone I’m not sure I want to be.

But that doesn’t matter anymore…

‘Cause I’d do anything you want,
Be the girl of your dreams, too.
I’d say the things you’d like to hear,
And change my looks, my heart for you.

I know it’s sad and reeks of desperation,
Yeah it’s tragic, but it’s true…
Honey, if you would just love me,
Maybe I could love me too.

Baby could you kiss me in the moonlight,
And see the stars in my eyes,
And let me take the pain away.
All those thoughts you’ve had today -
They don’t mean anything
As long as I’m around.

Please, just use me like I’m using you.
My heart tells me it’s choosing you,
And all these stupid things I do
Only promise me that I’ll be losing you.

And I know I’m simply sad and eighteen,
And life has much more planned for me.
What’s that look supposed to mean?
We used to speak so candidly.

And now I know you want to leave me…

But I’d do anything you want,
Be the girl of your dreams, too.
I’d say the things you’d like to hear,
And change my whole ******* self for you.

I know it’s so very sad and desperate,
Yeah it’s tragic, but it’s true…
Darling, if you would just love me,
Then maybe I could love me too.

Can you please just ******* love me,
So that I can love me too?

You put on your makeup
And your plastic face
Your big wide smile
And your social grace
You gaze out at your
Penthouse view
You're primed and ready
It's all about you
As you don your full length mink
You look in the mirror
And tip a wink
You're Gucci dressed
And designer shod

Don't you know beauty
is an inside job?

Downstairs waits your limousine
Goin' to Tavern on the Green
You meet your hubby
Do what's "right"
You'll meet your boy toy
Late tonight
You order dinner
Such style! Such class!
Only the best wine
For your glass
Your "friends" all love you
You hobnob

Don't you know beauty
is an inside job?

You exit the restaurant
To go to a show
Hottest ticket
Don't you know
Your hubby smiles
'Cuz you're on his arm
You're the classiest dame in town!

A homeless woman asks for a dime
You say get a watch to determine the time
You've given to charity
Such a snob

Don't you know beauty
is an inside job?

The beggar woman asks again
Your rich hubby starts to grin
"Gave at the office" He says with a laugh
You cut her off as she tries to pass
"Get a job" is what you say
She won't eat at ALL today...
She won't see a Broadway show
Heck! She has no place to go!
You smile smugly.
You hear her sob...

Don't you know beauty
is an inside job?

The beggar dies out in the cold
You're laid out, too, in a coffin of gold
She is comforted. You're bereft.
She goes to the right. You go to the left.
There's no respect of persons with God.

Because to Him BEAUTY IS AN INSIDE JOB.


SoulSurvivor
(C) 2013
Rewritten (c) 2/26/2016

Plump, skinny, short, tall
I'm surrounded by beautiful, talented people
They shine bright
Gifted
Short blonde hair
Plump *******
Long brown hair
Long waist
Tall and thin as a stick
Don't get me started on their eyes or face
I'm surrounded by beautiful people
All of them shine brighter than me

In books I get lost
I buy more no matter the cost
I'm addicted to the feeling
because the thrill is a sort of healing
for me at least
It's exhilarating to discover the next beast
lost in another world
yet still in my chair, body warm and curled.
Parties go unattended
and I hope they don't get offended
that I prefer books
over looks.

Perfect body proportions
Totally magazine hot.
Two percent body fat.
Bone structure of a god.
An hour workout daily
Jogging or the gym.
Specimen of health
Neither fat nor slim.

A high-dollar hairstyle
Nothing out of place.
The finest of products
Moisturizing the face.
Clothes from the proper
Stores with the right names.
Never take a chance on
Discount shopping games.

And, don’t forget the shoes
They have to be just right.
One set of shoes for daytime
And another for the night.
Not just any socks, either.
They must be picked with care.
You can’t be caught with
The wrong socks out somewhere.

Once the apparel is suitable
The grooming done just right
It’s quite all right to be seen
In public, day and night.
Otherwise the right people
Might trigger your worst fears
By thinking you were shopping
At Walmart, Kmart and Sears.

Beauty according to media:
Skinny
Perfect, long hair
Flawless skin and,
Being tan but not too tan
Beauty according to the general public:
Skinny
Perfect hair
Make up but not too much and,
No blemishes
Beauty according to the broken:**
Being able to get out of bed every morning and function properly
even after everything someone has been through
Not being afriad to speak your mind and,
Being capable of feeling a true emotion

Being well principled,
Is called "old skool",
And its not easy to hold on tight
To good principles,but even when you manage you're called a fool,
Its like the tv,social media have really become the devils tool,
Natural beauty is called ugly,
Its said only make up can fix you greatly,
That's the ******* we're beginning to consume,
I think we need to pause,rewind to the time of good principles,then resume.
An ideal body image is set,
And if you don't measure up to that,your looks aren't great,
The question is who's anyone,
To set up such standards for everyone?
Accept and love who you are,
Make your own rules,
Don't let anyone define who you are.

The way you feel
The way you taste
The way you are
I want more of it
Even with a sore
On your beautiful lips
I want more of you
I didn't want to stop because
I knew hat would be the last time
I would feel your amazing lips on mine
I had to savor that feeling
That moment when our lips are together.
I told you I would stop
In fact I might have promised it
But just know that every time I lay my eyes on you
I want to kiss you so very, very badly
And I wouldn't mind kissing you for the last time... again