If I stayed,
Would it be the same
As when I ran?
If I gave up,
Where would I be?
If I love,
Will it last?

I feel numb,
Everytime I doubt myself.

But what's the use of all these
Questions?
I don't know the answer.
But
what if?!

if I could spend the entire day talking to you , I would.
if I could stay back every single day just to watch you smile for 60 more minutes , I would.
if I could go out with you every day ,maybe nothing big, like a walk under the starry sky or to the bookshop, I would
if I could hold your hand for the rest of my life and laugh about nothing in particular
I would eat every single weird vegetable just to see your crack up and stay longer.
I would kick all the sand in all the deserts ever over your brand new shoes just to get your attention.
I would write you more poetry than you could ever read
I would text you all day, every day, you know I would.
I would probably scream your name over hills and listen to it echo around us.
I would tell the world what you really meant to me.
I would mess up your hair all the time to the point it would look like you REALLY didnt comb.
I would hold you and hug you till my arms would ache and then it would be your turn.
I would go back  and relive everything with you, the right way.


I really would if I could.
but you know I cant.
so maybe I'll just sit here
and dream instead.

If my heart was a book
It would contain torn pages only

If my eyes wrote
Letters would be blurred by tear drops

If my blood turned into an ink
My nerves would run dry

If my mind tried to narrate
It would be stop after every phrase

You have brought back these feelings
Resurfaced those fears
Of the fire inside
that had so many tears
A weak flame that was dying
Alive once again
Has now muddied the line
between lover and friend

That's how it goes for me
I don't know about you
The words passing might be
in that moment were true
They kept traveling on
Possibly a comet
As my feelings grow strong
Expectations not met

Once again feel a fool
Even though it's not true
And my heart gave to you
Time again I will do
But this time not the same
It's because you weren't here
Could not reach out and touch
So our bodies weren't shared

Just the words that were said
And the sound of your voice
Resurrect from the dead
Could not stop; Had no choice
Seems like that's how it is
In your lasso I'm snared
All it takes is one tug
And again I will care

Pilot light to a stove
A slight twist and it strikes
You've invaded my heart
Bursting flame will ignite
But if carelessly handled
It's me who gets burned
Walked all over and trampled
Same dolt who won't learn

I have built up the walls
But we're both trapped inside
The tight space is so small
There's nowhere I can hide

Face-to-face with you now
It begins and it ends
I'll get through it somehow
Are we lovers or friends?

If only,
Sleep did not limit conversation.
Distance did not limit interaction.
Prudence did not limit possibilities.
Weak muscles did not limit contortions.
Pain did not limit endurance.
Life would be perfection!

And yet,
Without sleep, who can speak coherently?
Without distance, is proximity as sweet?
Without prudence, would life continue?
Without motivation, why exercise?
Without pain, is pleasure as enjoyable?
Perhaps limitations are camouflaged benefits?

What if we said that we didn't have to fall to our knees to get our way?

What if we said that we didn't have to bend ourselves backwards for anyone but our own dreams? Or maybe not even then?

What if we could sprout wings and fly to anywhere we wanted to without asking for permission?

What if I could decide my own fate, my own destiny, my own consequences, my own future, my own life, my own world and never have to worry what they whispered about us?