overflowing, my heart, a torrential tide,
Words falter, emotions I cannot confide.
To love so fiercely, yet know it will not stay,
A cruel, aching truth that will not go away.

my heart, unbridled, runs wild toward you,
defying my reason, defying what is true.
each offering of love met with barren air,
An endless void, a silence unfair.

I cry out, scream, a battle in vain,
fighting shadows absorbing the pain.
the emptiness grows, a consuming abyss,
feeding on love, on moments I miss.

oh, how I long for your warmth, your care,
but the universe answers with desolate stares.
this love is a tether, a soul bound chain,
a curse unbroken, a beautiful pain.

to love this deeply is to burn and bleed,
to nurture a flower that turns to a ****.
yet still, I cling to the ghost of your name,
bound by the fire, consumed by the flame.

a love so eternal , a wound so profound,
a curse the echoes, no solace found.
but in this despair, a paradox lies,
for even in ruin, my heart cannot disguise.

So I bear this torment, this ache, this fight,

A beacon of love in an endless night.

For though it destroys, it is a truth I can not flee:

Loving you deeply is the curse that is me.

My father curses at the men in charge,
He tells me they're driving the world into dust,
But doesn't he know,
That we're just not done for yet?

And whether or not they put Coke ads in the sky,
There will never come a day,
When we are too tired to fight for liberty.

You're on to me.
This river comes from death.
I am not good at hiding things—
I am full of water.

The most I can do
Is to stay in my body.
It's so much, sometimes,
You know I ask the same of you.

My mind, the great bridge,
flapping fishes in my hands.
They love me,
but I can't control them.

Put them, put them
back
in the black
water.

I don't want anything more
than to gentle myself.
I'll not rage the last wave—
I'll breathe this through.

Do what you do.
Do what you do.

You're in the rushes now.
The pull is too strong.
Slowly, nature takes us all
Back to the salty ocean.

fighting

somewhere out in the world, somebody’s child is dying –
we all should be crying, but being miles apart, you right
now could be smiling – knowing not a thing

life is often tragedy; in other times it’s the happier times
to make us smile. we are a billion diamonds reflecting
each other lights – we hope to live, we all know we’ll
die, some hope for peace, still we fight within this life
to try and survive  

we do our best to dream, even when sleep has other plans
so for some, they re-enact the scenes from dreams to make
them seem real. though the past is gone, some of the memories
of it don’t make a retreat; some hope for peace, still we fight
within this life to try and survive  
                seems we’ve always been bred to fight.

Days spent inpatient
Couldn't save me from me
Years spent in treatment
Failing to set me free
Dozens of medications
Just to be told it's BPD
Hundreds of coping mechanisms
Yet you still won't believe
I've worn myself out trying
To fight for a release.

So alive and so in love
Like a single lily in the meadow, there we dance
Our waltz of love putting everyone to shame
We whirl and twirl, until the night fades away
As your coach arrives, I draw for a goodnights kiss
But away you ride, leaving me amiss
I awake to the sound of furious crashes
The ground shakes, It’s those ****** howitzers
The muddy trench comes in to view as my dreams fade
How I long this war to end so you and I can waltz again

it gets better, someone said
after a while, it gets better
impatience killed too many
and often life is too much to bear

i am still holding out for better days
at night, i kneel and throw out prayers
like dying prophet, i call out to God
will it mean anything, my dripping blood?

my fallen teeth, the uncountable tears
sweat and times i wanted to give in
my heart, a thousand have pierced
i still swing my blade like a fedayeen

if there is something big awaiting me
if there is light at the end of the tunnel
i am willing to fight for it
i will never throw the towel

for once, i will do what's right
for once, i won't die without a fight.