When night falls
the suns last rays are too soon forgotten
and the temperature drops
just like my heartbeat

Smiles quickly turn into tears
unspoken words and broken promises
the streets are almost as empty as I am

Try to drown out everything but the sound of the rain
loneliness is my only real best friend
my thoughts are darker than the night sky
and I wonder if I'm still alive

Cut my arms but I still can't feel
maybe reality is the dream
dead but breathing
I'm the ghost of the person I used to be

Wrapped in a blanket of sadness
my tears have become all too familiar
the rain sings me a lullaby
and I pray to never wake up again under this long dead sky

Because
With me, I walk blindly forward as my mess is overturned behind me as I sulken dream. To turn round eventually I find all that’s been done, with me left to tidy - to replenish and erase the mess that has already *******, spread rapidly into every corner of my insides. The lights go off when it burns off and the ashes tend to tell of time wasted of thirst and sense of waiting for his return.
I’m then diving into the spiral of aftermath that leaves itself to solve without answers. Heart stretches further and further away from its halves to avoid being engulfed by incoming wave which floods of knowing I would never have you.

And now
the pen I resist from daggering into my wrist so it’s ink can bleed into my insides with mellow wordly turmoil.

- See though, alone I thought I was safe. But those words that dropped out her mouth so unimpeachably illustrated you breaking into me. At that very moment. And unleashing the demons from their cage. I think I feel them gnawing now.

I Shall go through this road no more,
It disperses the lawn I live for,
My wounded feelings you ignore,
My blessing is constant war.

You are the mirage, I want to rely,
Which will dissapear and fly,
Your heavenly glance will leave me to die,
I will switch this desperate road, good bye.

Let me love you,
               here and now

In this glorious
               summer haze

And sweet goodbyes,
               we will say

When we go our
               separate ways

Here’s what you don’t recognize.
I cared too much I was blind
By someone who wouldn’t take the time
To trufully tell me things weren’t fine.

So here is where I get my turn
To tell the story you haven’t heard
You spit verifiable lies
While I send you **** cause you’re dead inside

So it comes as no surprise
That the selfish illusion of pride
Was something at least at the time
A wall from behind which you can hide

But like I can see through this wall
I can reach the other side.

I can only listen to ******* so many times.

I can’t save your *** this time

And you think everything is fine.

Well, truthfully like a newborn you’re blind
And when you finally do open those eyes
I’ll be gone I’m leaving you behind.

Manipulation is a state of mind
Sure I’ve had my run for a time
But I moved on to a better life
One that is honest caring and kind.

But it’s not easy
Finding the like mind
No you have to learn
That when I think of you
I think of a giant lie


So enjoy your new life.
I’d like nothing more than to witness it blind
Oh and tell the ones you like to run to
I don’t give a flying **** about your kind

In fact soon you’ll realize how little you actually tried
And you’ll be left with a shell of a life
See you tell me this

I can only take so much of this
You brought this on yourself
8 years sums up to a streak of sordid lies

And knowing what I said to the mask you work
You chose to act not like a friend
You acted like a *****

So for you posers wannabe swine
Check yourself and get back in line

You’re sheep to your egotistical minds
And that’s good and fine
You just won’t ever be able to reach your finish line.

So this is goodbye
I hope you dream of your lies
I hope perspective brings you pain
The same type as mine
Inflicted by another
Who tricked you into a love line.

rage simmers deep
in my stomach,
i swallow whole,
choking, tortured,
the words which
whisper violence
whisper courage
whisper shame

i'm floating through the halls,
my eyes glassed over, my heart
bleeding onto the floor
i don't have the energy
to mop up the red rage
resist repair
resist healing
resist righteousness

there is poison
sprouting from the ground
chemicals have turned
unhuman, unharmonious,
my fingers knives of solitude
breathing life
breathing death
breathing glass