When dreams become
nightmares that
twist in the brain,
how long can love
in the heart remain?
Will nothing ever
quench the flame
or fill the
lonely spaces?
As always it's you,
the affliction
and the cure.

Bitterness beseeches every
          GROTESQUE
                             Inch    of     me

Thoughts of your light enveloping
my existence in a
         condemnation
of
    sabotaging
                      dreams.

I am the dark queen, and you,
you are my ghost.

Haunting me perilously.

The destruction of my kingdom is welcomed.
        Dismantle
                Decimate
                        Destroy.
Poison me with ANY
                                    Affliction.
I welcome the cardinal sins of my evocations.
Blasphemy of my soul
Awakened and stripped
Of us, leaving me
Welcoming the blackness.

Of withering tempests screaming to the break of sunlight,
Of unrelenting wind and pounding rain, she stands
With her back to crashing waves and painful bellowing,
A weak induction of steady sighs and silent contemplation
Would perhaps bring a peaceful conclusion to the rage
And reproach of a Goddess stirring on the fringes of insanity.

But never would it have taken to fresh insanity,
The gentle swirling of confusion between glaring eyes and sunlight,
How she would wish never to part from the burning of rage
And leave a scorched shadow on the very place she stands.
Never did she desire for the learned art of contemplation
But instead found solace in a frozen lake of tears and bellowing.

At the end of such a night filled with harsh anxiety and frenzied bellowing,
She finds herself staring into the gleaming eyes of Insanity,
Who dwells in sweet and blissful contemplation
And harvests the piteous glow of sunlight
Such that any man would freeze and cease where he stands
And succumb to the urgings of exhilarating rage.

A chilling gust would release the embracing rage
And perhaps bring wishful silence to the obnoxious bellowing;
She feels her feet sinking through the sand and stands
out of reach from the tearing claws of Insanity.
Relief in the warmth of ethereal sunlight
Proves a worthy companion of contemplation.

Eudaimonia, she finds in her deep contemplation
Free of sorrow, empty and weary from her onslaught of rage,
She casts herself into the welcoming cracks of sunlight
And in Euphoria, she finds herself no longer bellowing,
The slow and steady pull of her chains toward Insanity
Break away and leave her where she stands.

In new light, she finds her strength and stands,
Embracing the drifting stream of wraithlike contemplation
Would send shivers and open wounds that might invite Insanity,
But turning around and gazing out into those waves might blind the Rage
And bring peaceful sighs to interrupt the senseless bellowing
Such that black clouds would give way to glorious sunlight.

To the death of Rage and the estrangement of Insanity,
The wistful bellowing banished in the silence of contemplation,
The Goddess stands with her back to the wind, tears dried by the warm sunlight.

Watery depths to sink in like stones, relishing the moments as gold wears down and folds.
Take this epitome of life and flush the blood out, the snow white complexion seemingly calmed down.
White gold mixes with bronze, bronze to mix with steel. This makes an alloy no stronger than it feels.
Quiet silence, sudden outbreaks, what happens to these souls when their love washed away.
Rush up to the wooden box, to be buried under the snow.
Push those regretful tears away, filled with sorrow and woe.
Put down those hands upon white cloth, resting onto the black attire to reminisce on the moment with loss

They think I suffer
From but one affliction;
But I enjoy it.

Lend me your smile,
stay here awhile,
don't ever defile
this embrace.

Capture my kiss,
The world is amiss,
Sunsets of missing
your face.

Beauty inside,
your laughter a ride,
hands coincide,
Possessive, and rough.

Awestruck, but scared,
Pricked, but repaired
The needle, she cared
I wasn't enough.

Sick with stronghold,
a promise so bold
someday, we'd grow old,
without interruption.

The voice in my ear,
no words, no tears,
your fragrance--not here,
her final consumption.

Time wanderer,
Life ponders,
Love fonder
but lost.

Since your goodbye,
no alibi,
plagued by
mental holocaust.

There you are again,
you old, reincarnated love.
Showing up in new faces
and handing me a token
of your affliction:
your half-empty glass,
a leaf ripped from its limb,
your one-way ticket to a place
I won’t be.

Here we are again,
walking down the street
under wet trees and lit balconies
as if we’re falling in love.  
You try to convince me you’ll
stay this time,
but I see the itch in your skin
to leave as soon as you realize
I recognize you.

And I do.
You’re a fiery first-kiss.
A five-day affair. Maybe this time six.
A reality check.

Light beams and a car horn
shake me awake.
A squeeze around the waist
indicates you’re still lying
beside me in bed.
I preemptively wince in pain.
Any minute now.

You pass through that door
like anyone would,
but I know what your
“See you soon,” means.

.
I still see you many a night in my dreams.
Sometimes you are intensely amorous,
Sometimes out of sorts and filled with grief.
Other times you are just violent and mean.

When I awake, my heart is beating fast,
haunting feelings and tears due to our past.
My mind feels ridden with guilt and drained,
My soul completely devoured by torturous pain.

God please know, I regret wrong choices made,
I walked out the door with so much left unsaid.
I did not have heart or courage to watch their face,
I turned around simply disappearing without a trace.

Lopez ©reationz 2014