The highs and lows of the tide continue, but it remains to be seen what will wash up on the shore...

So you're back again
Knocking at my door
I'd been fooled into thinking we were over
But you were waiting
you've been hiding under those veils of smiles and hope
I feel you wrapping your claws around me
Waiting to immerse yourself into me until we are completely one

My majestic moon
You cover me tonight
There, not fully obscured by the softness that surrounds you
Where you hold me in my place

And the stillness of the night echoes peace until the rustling of the blooming trees awaken to those who sense it
Calm and strong there can only be one you
My majestic moon

The warmth of you is like a cool summers night
With one kiss you quench my thirst
Summer how I love thee

It ONLY takes a change in perception to be:

Happy

or

Sad

Where you are now is ok
Explore it further and you will see it could be worse
Ponder on it even more so and you will realise it's where you are supposed to be for now
and when the time shall come you will be in another place wondering why you were ever uncertain and over analysed it all

Broken, he found me lying there
He cleaned and fed me and took me upstairs
He lay me down and covered my scars
I felt free for there were no bars

I had been tired, is what I'd said
And my guardian angel its more than widespread
A gentle hand brushed my forehead
Sleep my sweet, is what he said

As he got up to walk away
I pulled him close and asked him to stay
He replied, my love, for not today
Our time will come, I'm here to stay

He held me till my tears had dried
Until the hurt and pain had subside

He must have left throughout the night
For when I woke up he was out of sight

I looked around this new room of mine
I saw some clothes left on the side
And a note from my angel it read...

Good morning sunshine I hope you slept well
Please treat this place as it's yours to sell
Theres breakfast in the kitchen and a place to freshen
The day is your own do as you please
I'll come home and fall at your feet
Call if you need me.
Signed your A N G E L.

I freshened up and wondered around
Is this my new place and where I am to be found?

Time passed quickly from reading
a book
For the first time in ages I had a brighter outlook

Angel returned home and started to cook
I watched him attentively, not just a look

We talked and laughed till the early hours
My angel, I thought, has special powers

Days passed by and I started to grow
I even learned how let go

The past is the past for this now I know
The future is for me to love and grow

The best thing you can wear today is your smile

You entered the museum like a professional born to examine the pieces on display
And as you observed, questioned and pondered your face in turn reflected  your thoughts
My gaze shifted from the subjects to you
You drew me in
I observed, questioned and pondered upon my new subject, the real work of art that is you
With the other pictures on the wall existing merely as the background

Friends then kisses
Then friends again
Talking through my crazy thoughts

The hat is on and now it's off
Who knows what person I just got

It doesn't matter, its immaterial
What matters is that he never huffs

So friend or more or a little less
Meet me for some time never the less

As I watch you pass by I'm in awe by your gentle rhythm on a landscape of endless blue
Overcast by you, I dream away
How can I be closer to you?
How and why do you exist ?
And of course there are several answers, but I continue to ponder over you
For my heart craves for the mystery in you and to be with you
So I continue to watch and wait until such a return home to you, to me, our resting place
As I watch you pass by I'm in awe by your gentle rhythm on a landscape of endless blue

Today I see beauty
Wherever I look
Today is the day
I read my favourite book

Today I appreciate
Those that I love
Today I breathe deeply
No sigh overtook

Today I will do the best that I can
No interference from the rest of the clan
Today I give thanks to the lord up above
For today is the rest of my life that I love

God I feel I need you close
My heart in your hand to feed my soul
And when I feel lost or alone
Can you hold me like I've known?

God I ask you widen my sight
To come close so I feel your light
And when I feel scared and hurt
Can you show me your signs? I'll stay alert!

And then I hear a voice so clear,
" why Noor I never left you dear"
With this thought I take a breath, my soul at peace as I lay to rest..... Good bye fear.

You should touch me more
Bringing my face to yours

You should touch me more
Down to my core

You should touch me more
Bodies entwined furthermore

You should touch me more
Your fingers making me sore

You should touch me more
I long to ride this shore 

You should touch me more
I won't start a war

You should touch me more
I want you to explore

You should touch me more....

My Best buddy  
You claimed to always be there
my rock
We never knew it would happen
But then you changed
You outgrew me
No contact
No explanation
Just silence

A sigh but not flowing with relief
A mind thats in its height of disbelief 

Clouded thoughts that love to be lost
Lost in a bitter sweet defeat

Like a charm that cannot be broken
Or a lock for that there can be no key

These feelings are overtaking
My body and mind in a constant aching

Waiting for someone or something to impact 
A calm salvation that will leave my soul intact

A shake, a kick, a heavy hand
Anything to release me from this quicksand

Alas, nothing comes, no life changing act
When will this story have an impact?

Life is what you make it I hear everyone say
But the route of the cause seems so adament to stay   

For it seems that I am the only one to set myself free
One step at a time, it's a new beginning for me

I'm cursed and I knew it since the day I was born,  my life was riddled with hate and scorn
Tormenting and troubled were times at school, wishing I wasn't around playing the fool
I grew up unsuccessfully, sad and rejected its no wonder that I now feel so  alone and disconnected 
Death and sickness is all I can see, my heart in turmoil by just being me
Now married and older my thoughts are catching up with me, I wish I never entered
this place where they say the best things in life are free

You are far but your warmth surrounds me as though you are lying next to me

There is no sense in holding on so tight that you bruise your hands

I hear you beckon me
The Sea she echoes
She breathes
Follow me for a time, to a place to be
And you will see,
You will feel where you are supposed to be
And if you find it blissful
Why not stay a while and visit when you can

Destined for a never ending journey, not a destination....

You have taken my sleep my sweet
With thoughts of yesterday

You have taken my sleep my sweet
With dreams that want to remain

You have taken my sleep my sweet
With fantasies that rage within 

You have taken my sleep my sweet
And with that my sanity

Heal him
I asked, I pleaded I begged 

Make him
The way we remember him, at once my GOOD friend 

You have the power
To make him fresh

Hear my cry
Mend him, I said

Time passes by 
I see little changes
Signs of hope
But with little scope 

I need him to be well, cured is better instead! !

It's so long ago since he was my real brother
The very essence of him hidden under those unshakeable covers

Heal him
I ask, I plead, I beg

Missing you
My focus is upon you
Near or far but always in sight
The feeling of peace cocoons us
Whilst deserts and seas exist between us
Intrigued by this I question and ponder to an overthought place
Soon back to peace with your touch, heart and soul in mind
Engulfed by your vibration
Until the day I'll lay with you
That's where I long to stay
Missing you

Tonight I sleep in peace because I deserve nothing less than peace

Stop, I shout
At the venom you spout
I am fine the way I am!

Please, I say
God made me this way
I am fine the way I am!

Angrily, I cry
Am I broken, I sigh
Aren't I fine the way I am?

You are right, I whisper
I am not a pretty picture
I will change the way I am!
Ok, I state
And part hesitate
I will change the way I am!

Entangled and trapped 
I can't react 
I'm trying to change the way I am!

Enslaved and broken
My words unspoken 
I can't change the way I am?

Wearily, I speak
Confusion at its peak
I can't change the way I am!
The essence of me
Is undoubtably me
And I am the way I am! ! !

Enraged, I scorn!
You have been warned!
Love me or let me be....

I want his hands on my body
Holding me down rough

I want his soft tender kisses
that never seem enough

I want his strong hugs
that I long to get lost in

I want his charming banter
that quickly turns into sin

I want his demands
And I want them now

I want to meet them
And then take a bow

I want his mind and his heart
Although he's scared for that to start

I want him to want me
Like he once did

I want him to realise
I'm his and to bid

My own unrealistic expectations I cannot fulfil
Finally I can breathe
Finally I can be
Free..

Feelings of sadness and sorrow
Does anyone have a little happiness I can borrow?

A ray of light here and a smile there someone to hold me and
show that they care

A kiss on the head and then on my lips
A solid grip works your way to my hips

Suffocated by your warm embrace
Here is where I am for it is my only escape

A stretch accompanied with some stirs
I awaken alone...just me and my Mr liqueur!

I was always blessed
I will always be blessed
and I contimue to be grateful

So I lie here thinking of that better place
The one where u and I felt the warm embrace
The almost intimate moment that we'd succumb too
But it was not meant to be for logic, fear and sense took its cue

You call and I hear you
I understand the truth of your calling
I surrender to you
Oh the Peace, the Warmth of thee
My Soul breathing for what feels like the first time in a lifetime
I'm meant to be with you and you with me
No conditions, no expectations
Just engulfed in Love
The word Love unable to express the feeling of coming home
Oh the Peace
You call and I hear you
I hear you..

I was your model
And you the painter
Between us lay a white sheet of paper

You guided me 
to where I should be
A bend here, a pose there
But no expression for my face

Your pallet was full of an array of colours
Bright red, pure gold, blues and others 
But yet you daren't shade me in beauty and light for that
would be a terrible sight

With an inch Id try and move
to show you the light that fell on your display
But to no avail,  your eyes saw me as shades of greys that
would never be for sale

So I continued to pose until you were done 
And accepted that you would never see the beauty of
the shinning sun

There is pleasure in self pity only familiarity and possibly comfort,  so get out whilst you still can!!

The moon stands tall in all her grace thus beaconing the tide to her, he ever committed rises and falls with vigour and excitement
In ecstasy they dance their rhythm

The birds fly high in owe
Whilst the sea creatures glide with their momentarily fate
Until a calmness of peace succumbs them once again

People come into your life for reasons and seasons
Imprints left upon your heart
Life never quite seeming the same
Memories and nostalgia heightening your senses
The moon beckoning her shore on this day
Until the rising of the Sun
A new day dawning
Freshness engulfing all that she sees
Your heart repairing itself to breathe
People come into your life for reasons and seasons

When I am old and grey and have lost my memory I will think of you

Words, stones and guns
Blood, sweat and tears
Life, death and sprits
We don't dare to fear

I saw my path the other day
It was dark and eerie
I continued on this path as I saw no other way
Id heard stories where the sun shone and the flowers bloomed
but id never witnessed this way
Darkness clouded all and time nor Season needn't exist

But then Sometimes darkness gave way to grey but rarely did grey give way to the Sun
Id sometimes fool myself into thinking that the Sun was a dream that didn't really exist

When suddenly Light appeared, flowing here and there and in its different forms; music, dance and friendship
Until I wakened to view that I see what I see and I feel what I feel

To you I seek, question and gaze
Your words soothe my soul
Your wings protect me
Your arms give me warmth
I fear nothing nor no one
You are with me always
Our love eternal

I understand you and I speak my truth
I'm courageous and safe
I posses strength through the Seasons we see through together
I fear nothing nor no one
I am always with you
Our love eternal

The softness of you
Easing my worries
Caressing through me, to me

belonging to you
Heart and soul
Journeys different but destinations one

Letting go
But hopeful still
Momentous memories come to mind and overspill

The All knowing God guiding us to our truth
Belonging to ourselves
soulful journeys our only truth

Gone but never forgotten
Connected always
That's the ultimate truth

Your leaving me did not destroy me more than it annoyed me
Your silence did not ******* me more than it left a ripple in me
But it's ok I still vibrate

I made a lovely mistake today!
I contacted him
I contacted him
Because I felt low

Because I felt low
I reached out to him
I reached out to him
And it made me feel better

And it made me feel better
Because he is my escape my outlet
Because he is my escape my outlet
I am writing this poem

I am writing this poem
Because I made a mistake today?

I used to cry so much
that I felt  it never stopped
I cried about what had happened
and how he was so lost

I cried about the future
and how he would survive
I cried about his reaction
which was so unidentified

I cried throughout the day
morning, noon and night
I cried of all the hurt
and sorrow I felt inside

Now when I hear good news
I cry, oh boy, I cry!
For its now these special hope filled stories
that bring a shimmer to my eyes

One day there was stillness
... Life shortly followed

Don't let it happen I proclaim, but equally don't hold onto it and smother it I sigh,
Let it flow
Let it go
How I ponder
Really, tell me how?!
Show me, help me experience the Freedom of the Willow
For she bends with life
Teach me Willow?! Oh teach me for I am ready to learn