A story within a poem

{~~~}

I’m the only one left.
My pack was killed off, one by one.
Death shadowed me
Followed everywhere I went
Soaking my fur black
Killing my sight

I remember the look on her face
Her fur matted in the chase
Teeth stained red
Eyes with a wild dying light
Her muffled breathing slowing
I felt her life stop underneath her chest

Then you came
You saw your trophy on the ground
Next to a live one
You drew a silver stick
The sun glinted off like water with light
You stuck it in my side

You drug it up my already dead fur
Ripping up my flesh
I felt it clack against my ribs
With a sick yelp
I turned my tail and ran
Away from your prize

I wandered the forest alone
With Death on my back
Running from you
The stick was still in my side
Red water ran down my skin
Pooling everywhere I went

I could smell you following me
That is all that kept me on the run
I could feel my life drain away
I was slowing
Enough for you to catch me
Enough to finish the ****


It was at the field of feathers you found me
Just beyond the pines
I was lying, panting from the chase
Death was staring me in the face
And when my vision cleared I saw you instead
Watching me carefully

You had your loud stick at your side
Your face was hard like rocks
You just watched me
I stared back
Prepared for death
I’d die the lonely wolf

Your face softened
You neared closer
I had no strength to protest
You dropped lower
Almost crawling towards me
While I was crawling toward the darkness

You were just a blur now
Your hand closed around the silver stick
While your other hand traced the wound
You looked at that hand
Which was now blurred red
You muffled something softly

I looked up
A growl rose in my throat
I could see it
I couldn’t let it happen
You jumped back
The loud stick raised at me

I dragged myself to my feet
Snarling while red water fell over the feathers
It was so hard to see
But I could smell it
The intention to ****
You edged back

I took off running
Coming right at you
You howled at me
I was at full sprint now
But your stick
It howled loud and quick

That’s when I felt it
The burning in my chest
My eyes widened
I fell and stumbled
Feathers stirring in the sky
I tried to prop myself up
But I couldn’t

You stared at me
I panted out what was left of the red water
I whined at you
Just turn around
I barked; yelped helplessly
It was too late

The bear that was behind you
Struck you down
Tearing your flesh wide open
The red water was everywhere
I couldn’t do anything
I could only watch

The bear finally stopped tearing
It’s black eyes stared at you
A moment longer
A heap of red flesh
Barely breathing
It wandered off into the pines

I whined at you
You cried back
Darkness was on the edge of everything
Closing in on me
Closing in on you
I could hear your pain

I dragged myself closer to you
Whining
I could make out your eyes
Wide with fear
I groveled closer
You gingerly twitched your hand

I was close now
I could feel your life against my fur
Beating slowly
Your were almost gone
I licked an apology on your hand
I’m sorry

You looked at me
Your hand moving up my drenched fur
You grabbed the silver stick
And slowly drew it out
It didn’t hurt
I was already broken

You looked at me
And breathed one last time
I saw myself in your blue eyes
You had a soul too
I filled myself with air
And howled for the last time

A ragged voice in the night
Blood-red feathers in the sky
Floating to the stars
I was singing for me
I was singing for you
I was singing for us

My shoulders slumped
I fell to the ground
My sight was gone
I couldn’t feel you dead-still next to me
But I could still hear
My song echoing

Wolf song
If we should die tonight
We should die together

{~~~}

{~~~}

With every throbbing moment
I can hear you sing
Don't sing as loud as my heart please
I've been chasing my tail
The space between has never been so daunting
Let me close it
Zip Zip
The colours
Dripping off voices
Sweet and Salty
Come back as you were
Like how you are in my head
I'll sing with you
To the silver
Awhoooooo
You say ice had lists
Fire had regrets
What remains of littered bones
Break
Break
Snap like little bones please
You don't know how lovely you are
Can you answer me in the dark then?
Fade like my sorrow
Rush back to the start
The start of loving
Back to when I had taken a drink
Of youthful water
It tastes like metal
Metal and blood
Dragon scales
Night prevails
Black and white wings
Creaked with wood
Cracked with suffer
Come up and tell me
What do you hear?
Sweet
or
Salty?

Oh
This is how I feel when I'm with you
You are my Drug

{~~~}

☉The sun falls in November☉
☊ And won't rise until February ☊
It's a sick feeling
◉ Total darkness ◉
⍤The pines whisper their worries⍤
☾ Aligned with the moon's shine ☽
Hungry winter bears
❄ And snow-white hares ❄
◗ Try to escape the night ◖
Being out in
⚇ The Last Frontier ⚇
《 All you hear is your breath 》
It's a quite sound
⌭ Snow-creak ⌭
You're left me out here in the cold
☆ But I decided to put my hopes on the stars ☆
There’s so many
So many that are bright
★ I think the dark ones are my favorite ★
◎ *Your soul is a crystal sky ◎
✧ *Lit from the North ✧
Dancing to a shifting melody
☪ Only broken out at midnight ☪
Changing your colors
To fit your light between my dark stars
∬ Wavering ∬
§ Fluctuating §
⊝ Undetected by most ⊝
␥ But those special few watch from the water ␥
⎊ They’re alone like me ⎊
Soon your shows slows
↡ And you fall asleep with the dawn ↡
⚰ Frozen tongues can’t taste your remains ⚰
∈ Nor can they converse with themselves ∋
My heart was left out in the cold
⚉ And it learned to love Alaska ⚉
⚖ Solitude and freedom go hand-in-hand ⚖
⚔ I'm not afraid of commitments ⚔
**⚮ But I'm terrified that my heart won't have what it desires. ⚮

(The Dragon Prince and LycanTheThrope collab)

I’m on the graveyard shift again
Quite the keeper of you
Just a light year from us
We’ve been trading our crimes
The smoke in the air
Couldn't hide my shame
I'm running from nothing, no thoughts in my mind
Oh my heart was all black
I took the dust of a long sleepless night
And confessed I tarnished the gold
The wind took your clothes
Just walking the sidewalks all covered in rain
Love got into one of your stories again
The snow blowing ‘round your hands
While we ache to come home somehow
We watched her smoking autumn in the street
Words mean more at night
From the corners of my room
Please read them by the light of the moon
I'm a shot through the dark scaring the crows
I wish I could leave my bones and my skin
I’ll let my hunger take me there
Lonely is a sick hound digging for bones
If it weren't for second chances, we'd all be alone
They all know I’m a liar
They just laugh wickedly as I burn her down
And those broken-hearted lovers
They got nothing on me
She's a half-written poem
Spread out across the Great Divide
The dark had wooden teeth that broke up the thin air
And I swallowed the sun and screamed and wailed
When we were just larkspur and leaves
Back when we were buried jewels ‘neath the trees
And all fire and flames took all we trust
We were all silver and stone
And I traded all my thoughts in
For an hour of sleep in the snow
Sweet morphine curls a smile when the sadness hits
She's whispering so softly I can hear it all
Won't you come to my house tonight
I got this window that looks out to Orion
The Universe is wounded beautiful
I sent her my warmth and my silence
Lit up every campfire I found out in the dark
I quit counting stars that night in the cold
Kiss me so I remember how
We'll turn these sorrows into strangers
Learned the language of the Mockingbird
She took and twisted all my words
With winter trees and hungry wolves
In your past like a lover can be drowning water
Walking proud and lonesome now
Oh I'm yearning for the pack
Broken bottles shine just like stars
Seeing those golden oaks turn to timber
The daughter of the Northern Lights
Finds my face with her fingertips
Now we are rust coloured stones.
You’ll love her till it all goes dark
Come undone under the lion’s thorns
And I’m saving all my sleep for another life
Wished I could follow a hidden moon eight stories high.
Will we ever fall?

Ah what a shame
This stolen song was never meant to last

~The Dragon Prince
**~Lycan

“Session two;
Subject has become dependant; requires three capsules a day.
Subject has also requested for detainment.”


What is gold?
“What do you mean?”
Why can’t it stay?
Why couldn’t he stay?
“I don’t understand.”
Neither did Eden.

Patience
The window broke again.
“There are no windows.”
Debateable
“What?”
How could you lie to yourself like that?
“I’m not lying.”
I laid the centuries upon my hands.
“Time cannot be held.”
It can be lifted.

Dawning
“How are you?”
I’m very tired.
“Why?”
The voices kept me up again.
“The voices?”
They told me it was my fault.
“Is it your fault?”
If it is, then why am I so proud?

“Are you feeling any better?”
Has death said his due?
“Death?”
Hunger
“Would you like something to eat?”
I’ve already eaten.
“What?”
It came like rain.
“What did?”
Their sins.

Shunned
“Do you recall?”
His voice?
“Do you recall anything?”
It shifted like rubies-
-and lowered the moon.
“The moon?”
She sang a song for him.
“A song?”
It’s always darkest before the dawn, right?
“Some would say.”
I’ll follow the dawn.
“Why?”
Until I see the first light.

Grasping
“Do you remember her?”
I am still in love with that place.
“What place?”
The stars in my skin
“Stars?”
They danced and spiraled into amber trees
“What trees?”
Amber.
Just like her heart.
“Her heart?”

Who could compare?
“Compare what?”
Love to a tragedy.
“What?”
Why would they do that?
Aren’t they the same?


“End of trial.
Subject denied.”

On my throne
Your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful.



*I have to find you

“On the edge again.”

Why would you hurt something so grand?
RipRip
Dynasties were never meant to last
“How did you love her?”
How do I love him?
“No, her.”
The sky is her hands
"Why?"

Scrreeechh
Halted down to taste
“Taste what?”
A bit of my soul
...
Savor the colour
"It has colour?"
Mine does.
"How?"
With time.
"Time?"
Silver ebbing off the corner
“Souls have corners?”
Well they’re not ‘round

I didn’t plan to stay
Electric
Happy happy happy
“What do you see?”
Glass.
“Glass?”
No, water.
Shining to the sun
It’s a bit  *shiver.
“How?”
Because he said so.
Chilly

“What do you feel?”
How did I fall?
“No, what do you feel?”
With the stars.
“Hm?”
I feel with the stars
“What?”
Past the burning lake
And into lust.
“Lust?”
No,
Reckless

“What do you hear?”
No
“How-”
Dull
“What?”
Numb.
All I hear is empty.
“Why’s that?”
Don’t you hear your heart echo too?

*“End of session”

Confession.
I miss you.

The first thing I professed
was not the warm feeling I had whenever I saw her
Nor was it that it was I who had sent her flowers
And signed it
"your admirer”


The first thing I admitted
Was my fear
That everything I touched
broke

I remember what you did,
Just like it was yesterday.

Your eyes brimmed with tears,
And you smiled a sad smile.
I smiled back.
-
The first time we were together
It was at your house
You showed me your dearly loved piano
And played me my favorite song
“Clair de Lune”

Wringing the keys dry of passion
I remember thinking
If I poured my soul out like you had
Maybe,
Just maybe,
you’d fall for me.

You showed me
The spines of books you read countlessly
Finger fluttering over every title,
Tracing each word
Like I would your stomach
Each night you spent in my bed
You told me that I
“was like the ocean.”
I didn’t know what that meant at the time.
-
Moon
Moon moon moon moon
The word I engraved in your ribs
every time I touched you.
Moon
My moon.
My lovely moon with sky blue eyes,
That never stopped moving.

I wish you could stare at me like I had you
Maybe you could have seen
That every moment I spent
My gaze was on yours.
But perhaps it was better that way.

-

I was bitter.
You told me not to be.
and so I wasn’t

-

Christmas Eve I came over for dinner
And I bought your mother chocolates
In hopes she would learn to savor you
Like the box she held in her hand.

I never told you how jealous I was
That you had your mother
Despite her flaws

That night I saw you cry for the first time.
When I held you in my arms
You shook because of your father.
You asked me why god would do this to you.

I had no answer
Other than
“I don’t know.”

I should’ve told you
How I had wished I was in your place
That I would take the pain for you.
But I didn’t.
I know you never would have wanted it that way.
-
When your birthday came
I gave you a jadestone bracelet I had crafted myself
I did not tell you the time I took,
Or what it had cost.
I had hoped you would treasure it
Like I to you.
-
A month ago I saw my loving jade
On your best friend’s wrist.

I did not tell you how much that had hurt.
-
You gravitated towards him
And grew closer with others
I drifted
Oh like the sea
-
That March I went to California to see my ma.
I don’t recall if I told you
That every night
I watched that sun sink into the coast.
And it reminded me
The way your hand held mine.

When I came back you spoke of nothing but sadness
I tried endlessly
To tie a knot in that poison-filled vein.
But the sickness spread.
I wish I could’ve been your cure.

You were sand slipping between my fingers
And I did not know how to tell you
That my waves had lost purpose
If there was no shore.
Come Back
-

“Captain O’ Captain,
The eye of the sea
Was the bottom of her heart.”

-
Summer had come
We had spent one tired night watching fields of fireflies
At 1:49 am

I couldn’t find words
To tell you my heart had danced
Like every one of those little lights
When someone even breathed your name.
I wish I had
Summer had gone

-

When fall had struck
You left me.

-

My thoughts clammered in disbelief

You told me it was because it was you and not me.
Just some sort of cliché I suppose.
-
Months later when I asked
You said it was because you thought I had feelings for another.
How foolish I was for letting you believe that
For even a second.

I should have told you
Your soul had sunk a hole in my chest
that beated to the sound of your voice.

My heart sang a sick melody*
-
Two years have past
Last week you told me you left
Because you didn’t feel loved.
You never saw the way my eyes traced up and down your body
but always pulled back to your face

I remember what you did,
Just like it was yesterday.
-
When I confessed
You kissed every one of my fingertips,
And said that you did
so that everything I touched
would feel loved.

Oh, how I wish those words were true.

{~~~}

Death has a grip on you
Cupping your face in his palms
I know I shouldn't feel so drained
Because you're more tired and worn
I can see your threads fraying
Teeth of a wolf couldn't break your line
But I can...
This cancer is eating you away
Beneath your skin I can see you're broken
Your try to hide it with your dark humor
But know that I can see through you
Paper thin is what you are
But it is I who is ripping
I don't really know what your are to me
But I do know
It's killing me,
Watching it **** you.

{~~~}

Jealousy is seeping through my skin
Like kerosene
My head is spinning from the fumes

You may have showed me where the matches were
But it was I who struck it aflame

Standing here
Never feeling so empty
A heart so ****** and twisted

She's been cornered
Pushed to lash out
Scared of being a lone wolf

Fire dances on her fur
Coal-black eyes
And embered teeth

All I could do was
Burn
And
Stare.

Ashes fill her mouth
They've never tasted so dry
Love-parched

I don't want to be alone.
But you've already left me.

I'm sitting here
Staring at the floor
The tears streaming down my face
Sobs overtaking my lungs and racketing throughout my chest
It already hurts enough
Maybe it's the bruises on my ribs,
Or my demented mind that's stuck on depression
Or maybe the fact that I've been trying to pick up these pieces
And fit then together
It always falls apart
I try so hard
Taking these shards of glass
Attempting to make a perfect reflection
I've cut myself again
Sometimes all I do is stare at my wrists
Watching the blood flow over
Spilling
My life is ebbing away
And with every weakening heartbeat
All I can think about
Is how I've lost

Somehow
I sit up
I don't know why I try anymore,
But I do
I wipe the blood off of the pieces
And puzzle it back together
Finally, it holds a relfection
When I get past the cracks spiderwebbing across the pane,
The red edges pointed out at my skin,
And when my eyes adjust to the darkness
All I see is a broken figure staring back at me.

That's nothing to hang on the wall.

{~~~}

I put my hands over my eyes,
Rather than to hold them out and catch myself,
Because I don't want to see myself fall.

{~~~}

These bruises don't change anything.
So why do you continue to  hurt*  me?

{~~~}

Silence, Silence.
Is all I can hear
Shaking in darkness
Never to be clear

Waiting, waiting.
For you to see
That I am something
One crying plea

Fading, Fading.
Till I am gone
Shading shadows
A soul undrawn.

Forsaken, Forsaken
Living in parts
I realize the reason
For one broken heart

{~~~}

Today,
I feel like committing suicide.
I'm so tired of it all
Pretending to be someone I'm not.
Putting on a fake smile to please my family and friends, so that they don't worry.
I want them to think I'm happy, even though I'm so far from it.

Its not the new year that finally did it
The 'new year new me' thing.
I know who I am and there's no fixing it.
It's my abusive dad that pushed me over.
The fact that he can't be greatful for anything I do
And when he's asked me to do something I've already done
The job I did for it wasn't enough.
The fact that he yells at me because I ask for something at the store, whether it be socks or a candy bar.
"No you don't deserve that."

Maybe it's the fact that he puts me down so much
And every time I deny his words he gets even more angry
I don't know why I bother
I don't deny them for my own sake.
When I do he throws whatever is nearest
Plates, countless beer bottles, even a chair.
I lower myself to the floor, crying.
Maybe I get him so mad in hopes he'll finally throw something fatal.
A knife that just happens to hit my neck.
I've never had the courage to take my own life.
I am worthless

What ties me here?
It's the one I love.
He deserves so much better than me,
But he says he loves me for who I am.
I am broken.
He's a reason to go too.
The fact that I can't touch the one I love without being pushed away.
Being told no and stop.
I hear the same words my father says in my lovers actions.
"No you don't deserve that."
I know I don't.
I'm sorry for wanting something.

Maybe I want to leave because I have no one to turn to.
Because all of my friends already have their own problems, and I'm just another burden they shouldn't have to deal with.
And anytime I talk to them about my own problems
It becomes a competition
Suddenly we have to top each other on who has it worse.
"I would **** to be in your place, my father is so much worse."
Again.
I hear my father's words
"You don't deserve to complain."
I really don't.

Maybe it's the fact that I'm already dying.
As I write these words my heart tears at my ribs, desperate to get out.
Its like a panic attack within my chest
As if someone grabbed my heart and squeezed it so hard.
I don't want to feel pain anymore.
Please
Not another heart attack.

My little slice of heaven.
It's so far away.
So far.

Sitting with my lover
As he whispers words I haven't known much about.

"You're beautiful."
Who could see beauty in something so far gone.
So dead inside.

"I don't want anyone else."
Who would choose me?
I'm nothing grand.
I'm a dead reflection in a broken mirror.
Nothing to hang on the wall.

"I don't deserve you."
You don't.
I'm so sorry.
You deserve so much better.
Someone who can make jokes with you,
Be more patient than I.
Someone who can love you without dying at the same time.

What sickness lies within me.
I cannot stay here any longer.
My little piece of heaven is too far off.
"Just a few years.
Just a few years more."

I don't have the strength for that.
Not anymore.

I'm sorry.

The pines whisper in the wake of your fury
Shaking from the earth in chords
C
       o
            s
                m
                    i
         ­                 c
Winds whip at my royal fur
Grinding my night skin with frost and rime
I swear to you my sold soul is no place to sleep.
Love isn't accepted by these fangs of misguided  pride
It's in my burning hours you'll see my core
made of silver
And my eyes bursting with gold
Shoot me dead, but I refuse to back down
Light me anew purpose
And I'll still fall back on my instincts
Dragons have run their claws in my side
But I care not. I'll bleed a conceded trail
My paw prints left in the deep of space to the cedar forests
I run on for someone I swore an oath to protect
My poet is my blood in my veins
She is the words in my voice
She is my beating heart,
*.::.The only thing that keeps me going.::.

{~~~}
The words have slipped from my mouth
I hold my breath
As my heart travels south

All I can fear is the beating through my chest
I open my mouth once more
But my mind protests

Death is cupping my cheeks
His icy fingers lurching up my back
But you never speak...

I feel the stars run down my face
Spiraling down
Disappearing back into space

The sickness spreads
I bar my stomach in
As it repeats in my head

The darkness closes in
I stare at you in place
Shadows tighten my skin

Oh bones have never felt so brittle
They snap like my courage
And I have never seemed so little

My soul begins to crack
This is how it feels when I say 'I love you'
And you say  n o t h i n g  back.
{~~~}

It's not a Walt Disney thing
They don't just pick off the sick an dying ones
They are perfectly capable of taking down a full, healthy adult.
Wolves were designed by thousands of years of evolution
They were bred and raised to ****
Not for sport, but for survival.
They don't **** needlessly
It may be intimidating
Seeing the blood on their face
Their glowing eyes staring back
But if you're going to tell me that
Wolves are man-eaters
Blood-thirsty killers
Why don't you take a look around
Most animals go corrupt because of humans.
We take their land
Take their young
**** off their pack-mates
We even trap them
For pets, or zoos
Whatever reason we want.
I don't know about you
But if someone took my home
My kids
Killed my family and friends,
And then cornered me
I'd fight back with every ounce of strength I had.
I don't know what they're gonna do to me
But I'd assume they'd do what they did to the others
And
I'd fight for my life


They're killers,
*But wolves have to make a living too

{~~~}

I've walked these woods for as long as I can remember
These pines tell tales of their own
It was foolish to go out barefoot
But I did this time anyway

The well-worn path had gotten stale
So I elected to step off the path
The creek-bed lead the way
And gladly followed

It was about 4 miles deep
Maybe more
And the sun was just about to set
That I had stumbled and fell

I heard it before I felt it
Snap
The pain rushed in
Drowning out the sound of my screams
The blood was pounding in my ears just as fast as it was pouring onto the ground

I don't know how long I stayed like that
Just crying and screaming
For anyone
But no one came

After many failed attempt to get up and move
Only to flail helplessly and fall
Causing more screams
I ripped a length off my shirt and tied it tight around my thigh
Just as I had seen in the movies

Night was falling on me
Shadows were creeping in
I was scared beyond grief
Wide-eyed and terrified
I prayed for something

That's when he came looming out of the darkness
I thought I was dying at first
Seeing white flashes
But he made his appearance

Two gold eyes were peering out of the shadows
They glittered with curiosity and wonder
He cautioned closer
Just enough to make out his white body

I was fascinated at first
Awed that a wolf had lived in these parts
Fear dawned on me
There was blood everywhere

I didn't know much about wolves
I thought maybe they were soulless  animals
Looking for a fight
Hungry to ****
Blood-thirsty and ravenous

I thought for sure he'd attack me
Rip into my flesh
Snap more of my bones
End my life sooner than what it would just out here

He edged closer
Watching me carefully
I could hear my ragged breaths above my pounding heart
His ears twitched at the sound

He didn't come closer than fifteen feet
Now I could see he was actually a very light grey color, almost white.
He just stared at me
For a long time
He watched me
Watch him

My breathing began to slow
And my heart rate went down
It was now that I realized he wasn't going to **** me
I just studied his face in the darkness

Suddenly, the wolf got up
He had been laying down for some time
His gold eyes were stunning
Bursting with spirit

His mouth popped open
Dropping down about two inches
His teeth gleamed wickedly in the moonlight
I got scared again

I couldn't hear him breathe in
But his chest expanded beneath his fur
His eyes flashed
And he lifted his nose to the sky

A piercing sound hit me like a tidal wave
It filled the air
Leaving no space for any other noises
It was demanding sound

The crisp sound was breathtakingly beautiful
His voice jumped up and octave
Before making its descent
He broke off
Leaving his howl echoing off the trees
Humming in the ground

He didn't look at me at first
Instead his gaze traveled around us
His head flicking here and there
Before he looked at me

My ears were still ringing by the time he laid down again
He put his head on his paws
Just staring at me
While his ears swiveled back and forth

We sat like that for a long time
More than a half of an hour
That's when he got up again
He filled his lungs again and threw his head to the night

This howl was different
The first was awing
Piercing you with it's notes
This one was different

Its heavy somber tone was striking
It found it's way into my chest
I could feel the vibrations beneath my skin
This one was submissive
Giving in

He broke off suddenly
His ears propping up fast
He swiveled his head around the clearing
This time he didn't sit down
He'd only glance at me time to time

It was like this for about fifteen minutes
That's when he howled again

Just like before
This howl was different
His eyes watched me as he voiced his longing

A cold ragged feeling hit the air
The night seemed to pause as he sang his song
His notes stacked upon themselves
Ringing up higher into his register
Before he dived into his chest
It was a throaty feeling
Dancing in my bones and capering in my blood
His voice edged off into silence

His soulful eyes gazed at me for the last time
Then he turned and walked into the shadows
"Goodbye." I called out to him instinctively
He never turned his head back
I had a feeling I'd never see him again

I began to feel incredibly alone and lost
The only one that was here abandoned me
My thoughts were lost to the dark
As I struggled with my tears
I yelled in frustration
I was going to die here

"Hello!?" Someone yelled not too far off
I was shocked but I quickly regained my ground
"Hello! Please help me!" I called back, holding in tears
"Hold on, I'm coming to you." I could hear the bushed move and twigs snap as whoever came closer
"I'm over here." I could see them now
"Are you hurt?" I could tell now he was a man, early twenties. He leaned over me
"I think I broke my leg."
"Oh Lord. We need to get out of here. I'm going to try to pick you up, it's going to hurt." His arms gentle closed around me, carful to not brush up against my bad leg
I nodded
I bit down on my lip as he lifted me into his arms, holding back a scream. Silent tears ran down my face as he carried me back onto the path.
"I'm sorry." he told me
"What's your name?" I tried to busy myself with thoughts
"Conan. Whats yours?"
"Cinder."
He carried me in silence for awhile. With every step he took pain seared up my body. I began to think maybe I had imagined the grey wolf.
"Why did you come here?" I asked him.
"I hear a wolf howling. I thought maybe I could catch a glimpse. Thankfully he howled three times, I almost turned around after walking for a half hour without hearing anything. But he howled again. You heard him right?"
"Yes I heard him."

He had called for help
He was my savior
That wolf has a soul too

{~~~}

I hate the way
The rain softly lands on the ground
Just enough to get my feet wet
But not enough
To let me drown.

“Session three;
Subject has loss of appetite.
Two days since Subject’s last meal.
Loss of weight; 16.234 kilograms
and counting.”

It’s two till midnight.
“It’s three forty-three in the morning.”
That doesn’t matter to her.
“Why?”
She said it’s all wasted the same.

sinner
“Did she come again?”
In and out of silver.
“Explain.”
She got into my blood,
“How?”
With those cloudless eyes.
“Why?”
There weren’t enough.
“Of what?”
Rubies.
“Why do you need rubies?”
Count every time we’ve fallen.
“Why?”
She regrets it.
“Who regrets it?”
Tasting the wolf.

Hauntless
“Why aren’t you eating?”
I miss him.
“Who?”
It makes me sick.
“What?”
I’ve wasted.
“What did you waste?”
Please.

You found weakness.
“Do you know what’s happening?”
Yes;
Atlas gave me his burden.
“You cannot carry that.”
She lets me.
“Who?”
Lily-scathed and lapis shelled.
“What?”
She was so pretty.
“Who was?”
Lavender in the cosmos.
“Lavender?”
Yes!
Basking in folding chambers.
“I don’t understand.”
She was my west.
“What do you mean?”
I followed her into the sun.


Why didn’t he keep me?
“Who is ‘he’?”
My north star.
“The north star?”
That little bird with her owlet wings.
“What?”
Moons with comfort.
“Moons?”
No one wants to fall alone.

Spiteful
Don’t be afraid.
“I’m not.”
You are.
“I’m not.”
I like the way you smoke in here.
“I don’t smoke.”
Quiet your heart.
“What?”
You’re afraid.
“I’m not.”
Don't lie anymore.

“I-
-
I am.”

Smile soft.

“Assessment end;
Subject has gotten to me.”

You left me
Broken
Scarred
And Bleeding
But I forgave
I can’t forget
Not now
Not yet
But when I do leave
I won’t leave you like you left me
I won’t hurt you
I won’t scar you
I won’t break you
I won’t make you bleed
I won’t make you feel pain
Pain hurts people
It breaks them
When you hurt someone
You can feel it burn under your skin
You can hear the ice rush in your blood
You can see the dark shadows in your eyes
You can taste their pain, cracking with every touch you make
So why didn’t you feel it
Burn past my skin
Why didn’t you hear it
The ice cracking my frozen blood
So why didn’t you see it
The shadows leaving me blind
Why didn’t you taste it
My pain cracking me inside to out
I’m breaking from your touch…
I tried to learn how to
Make my skin as hard as steel
To heat my blood with fire
To live in the shadows
To hide my pain inside
and put the pieces back together
But they don’t fit.
They’ll never fit.
They can’t.
I’m In pain
When I hold him
Pain hurts.
Pain may be a 4-letter word to you
But to me
It’s what my life has become.
I don’t feel anymore,
Nothing but you touch.
I don’t hear anymore,
Nothing but your voice.
I don’t see anymore,
Nothing but your face.
I don’t taste anymore,
Nothing but your pain.
I don’t live anymore,
The pain killed me.
I won’t forget
Not yet.
Not until you know what pain I’m in.
Pain breaks people
It scars them
They can never pick up the broken pieces
because they cut themselves
they injure themselves
just trying to put them back together
They don't know they can't fix it
They wonder where it all went wrong.
Please stop giving false hopes
It wasn’t their fault that they,
Bleed more feeling
Damage more sound
Hurt more sight
Wound more taste
**** more life
Like you killed mine
I’ll leave you
Unlike you left me
You are unhurt
Unscarred
Unbroken
and feel no pain
Pain.
A 4-letter word to you
But my life to me
I’ll let go of my pain now
Because,
finally,
I let go of
*You.

I’m bending time to break my shins
Sputtering like blood amongst the rocks
Nesting in sorrow and tailing the wick something sharp
If this era wasn’t meant to char
Then why did the candle wash every tower
From here to the sea?

Dreams beckon you
A quest to find seething lines
Bravery isn't a trait I believed you lacked
You’re a lack of lies entitled to hunger
In a mouth of iron sleep

Timber wakes in the golden age
Maybe if I was bold like your key
I could carve myself a new shadow
And put my bets on the cold long promise to appear
Holding Atlas up as he holds the sky
Suspicion he described to me

You’ve been cornered by natural desire
Pillars of salt holding up your favors
Signs of a ruptured heart
Bleeding ‘neath your skin
But who shall rift your bruised weight?

I shifted through the gallowed falls
And found constellations inspired by my scars
But reality sunk my stone in the river
Deeper than the ground walks
Fear fires on mistake
Cravings of love in death
Swallowed

*It’s all in the sleight of hand

Ѫ Can Ѫ
Ꙋou
Ⴔ Wake Ⴔ
The
Փ Sleeping Wolf? Փ
<><><>
Θ Gravity Θ
( Centered )
ϴ Stars ϴ
\/ Aligned \/
<><><>
You are
ж My sense ж
⧭⧬ Of Conception ⧬⧭
<><><>
Ͼ  Lovers of moonlight Ͽ
շ In A Reign շ
Ӿ Of Cedar Ӿ
.::.Towers.::.
<><><>
||||| Shake |||||
Oh
||||||||| Shake |||||||||  
● Nail ●
Me
⥀ To the ⥁
_Floor_
<><><>
In the
փ Book of the Lion փ
It's
⇷Raining⇸
Ψ Violence Ψ

She was conceived of fire
Rubies
And fate

Her long winter breath
Curling down
My hate

Mist on her fingers
Swirling
Beach tides

Snow ladden leaves
Youthful
In Autum's lie

She's sick of November
Thrashing
In grey

It's almost December
Timing
A wolf's prey



*Who would ever save a golden moon?

I hate that I love you, but you don't love me.

Echoing hills can tell your past
A dark and fortuitous time
Stars will craft their best
And skies will lark the eve
Tell you haven't wasted your honor
On a ghost of linder
Retching a few minutes
To spare hearts an attachment
Condem me of all my reapful sins
A pledge to you
On this golden scribe
My honor and service
So that I may avenge this death
*In all the annals of time

{~~~}

I see the warmth
But feel the ice
I cannot touch
A storm to die
Frost grow faster
Shivers along my spine
The ice is breaking
  Cracking in thin lines
I don’t feel
That I’m slowly  f r e e z i n g
Ice in my veins
And I stop b r e a t h i n g
Nothing to touch
      Nothing to h-o-l-d
Why do I live in
A World So Cold?                                                                                        
S­ h a d o w s all around me
That I can feel
I cannot see
If they are real…
There is no end
There is no light
A broken soul
Without a fight
How can I see you
If there is no sun
But I can sense
That you're not the one
I shattered the surface
I killed the spark
I am forever alone
In A World So Dark                                                             ­                                   
Then I saw him
My breath was taken away
What could I do?
What could I say?
How did I miss him?
Was I too blind?
     Too see his perfect look
One of a kind?
I fell for him
But he caught my soul
He held me in his arms
  And made my heart whole
No longer cold and dark
No longer filled with regret
Because he’s in my life
In A World So Perfect.                                                                                        

{~~~}

Wolves don't play for keeps, they play for kills.

It is I who signed the contract,
A pledge of service
I ended my loyalty to my pack
I traded my royal fur for a pelt of fleas and mange,
Soaked with blood and ridden with scars.
A once noble leader heeded to the feet of men
My once padded paws were now too raw to scab over,
My prideful fangs now chipped and cracked
Tail between my legs
My ribs showing their attachment
My ears cut off
To show a dog of war
My head once held highest above them all
Now hung low in defeat
I had to watch cautiously,
They could lash out at anytime
Raking their daggers in my side
I was once a proud wolf
But I vowed my favor
Not knowing my eyes
Would lose their gold
And my soul
It’s value
That of royalty
Now bowed
To mortals
My pride
and pity
Was my
**Downfall

{~~~}
You say you like me.
You say you want me.
But-
You don't want to make a commitment.
Then that girl
The one I called my best friend.
She likes you
But it's okay
She can flirt with you
"I guess."
She can go ahead and claim you.
"You can't really do anything because you two aren't dating.
I can flirt with him as much as I want."
She can just spit that in my face.
And it's okay.
Oh this salt has never burned such open wounds.
Why don't you just drag a knife down my back.
So I'm just sitting here tearing myself apart.
The tears are running down my face
I have no one to turn to but you
But how can I talk to you of how I feel?
You do feel the same way about me like I do to you.
I'm not that mad.
I'm just utterly depressed.
Not because of what you think.
It's not because she's flirting with you,
No.
It's because what she said is true
We're not together.
You're not mine
{~~~}

Ground hip bones
And sickened stones
Break a seal
The legacy of fear
Is the folding factor
Against the test of time

Burning is something beautiful
Flames licking the air
Reaching
Trying to get ahold
Just a grasp
A handful of the night
It tries to hold it up
But
It has no real support
Yellow flames
Gold
White, and red
Orange and green,
Lowering to blue
Just like the Aurora Borealis
The coals smolder
When the fire flicks out
Embers glowing orange
Cinders
And
Ashes
All that's left is black and grey
Shale and ash
Coal black
Sparkling in the sun
It kills
It burns
It hurts
Everything in its path

Everything about fire
Is beautiful.

Her* skin catches *Twilight
Following granite constellations
Brewing cheap gold with royal bones

Admiring Gravity,
As he names loyalty a mistake

Inhale these guilty match strikes
And double the clashing of crows
Defiance sets the sun
Leaning destined liars savage

Immortality may be heartless,
But is her shadow is quite becoming

Tide stays with my soul
Pulling its ruby grooves to the branded moon

Legends belong with the Reaper’s pawns
Smoking oblivion into winter

Sadistic skylines
Greeting sickness,
With hostile charity.
Deprive betrayal their reason
Gems don’t shine in focus

Hollow depths,
As brittle as her throat
Coaxing words from her ghost lips

Searching for a sign of life
The water lines on nails
Winter flakes carry twisted; Single
Drenched in blood and ivory


I see fear, flashing in her shallow wolven eyes.


                                                        ­                                                          ~Lycan

War Dog

I've tried to keep a close distance
But you left me behind.
Here I go
Walking down the street on my own
We are not the same.

Be true to me
Tell me I'm not alone
Prove to me
That you'll open the door
To let this war dog in
With his cut ears
Close up the hole
That tore through my skin
I'm a dog with a broken leg
Tendons too torn to mend.

"Trust me to take you home."

You'll put me to sleep.

I don't want to die alone.

You said you'd be there.




I won't fall in love with you this time.

I've got some promises to keep


There's a degree of difficulty
In dealing with me
From my haunted past
Comes a daunting task
A midnight escape is stuck in my mind
There's not an open window I can find
Staring at the wall
Forgetting it all
I'll guard your heart and forget my own
To make up for the happiness you've shown
Whispering to him absently
I'm trying to prevent another tragedy
Wilting bones and herbal fear
Are all at once crystal clear
These fevered dreams
Bringing terror screams
What is running through your veins?
A blood that cause pain
I've drained your life that night
Alone with the dark sight
The fires set ablaze
Not even phased
When the smoke does pass
I'll rise from the ash
And show you a burning Phoenix free
But what if I can't be all that you need me to be?

Another night without sleep

Now I just think about who else is kissing her.
I can't breathe because he only kisses her once.
He doesn't care if it's perfect.

{~~~}

Winter has fallen

12 feet under my won problems
It's amazing how cold it feels
Ice spiraling up my back
The snowflakes cracking
But the ice is hollow
Frost-covered yet not completely frozen
The rime freezes my heart
Empties my essence
But keeps my soul warm

Fall will rise

{~~~}