Maybe the majority of your malice march is fueled with fire;
fictionalized by myself. Simply because my greatest desire is
currently to avoid knowing that you long to hurt me. Dear, let
me tell you this; **I know everything.

Grab me by my wrist and so tightly; I want you to pull me back into your life don't shut me out again please don't make me beg for your attention I just want to be held in your deepest comprehension.
All I know is I love you too much to not act out when you say you're going away I cannot bare to watch your shoulders as you turn around and walk the other way- the way that's away from me. An opposite direction that is in more than one way heart breaking do I really not mean anything at all to you? Is it so easy to turn around as the tears fill up my eyes and start to slip from my eyelids, is it really that easy- for you to say goodbye..

*If you were to ever really scatter I would probably shatter, please don't say goodbye.. anytime soon.

Honestly I am so done with your ****
*               I need help, won't you do this?
This time no, I don't think that I will
I'm tired of trying to do a good deed
just for you and it comes right back-
freezing my heart some worn out
number below zero degrees. I'm
so tired of trying to be there for you
always 100 percent and you just not
seeing it. you made me go from types
of sublime to forms of somber. You
were never really-TRULY-there for
me I now can remember that, simply.
This is my goodbye, don't contact me
again in this life.

You describe me as a sunflower that was planted beneath a bee hive
I suppose you just are unaware of my aching need to hide
but my personality makes me seem closer to some kind of ****;
I am lazy and tend to hide,
I often wilt when hurt; I subside.
I try my best to not attract attention
Do you understand yet; what I'm venting?
When people get too close to me I tend to *****
if I feel the need. You might bleed; I stress so much-
stay away from me.. I just don't want anyone to be hurt.
Just try to understand that I'm not a flower and if I am I'm off
somewhere in the middle of no where, waiting to be picked.

I close my curtains once the sun comes up
I ignore the light and keep myself closed off.
I'm sick of the brightness when I'm in such
a dark place
Does no one understand, they should go away?
The darkness is soothing, but also leaves me
with a wanting; some special kind of craving
it nags at me even when I'm safely sleeping
Which should be a place where it leaves me
but sadly there is no such place
**It always finds me.

It looks like we're gonna see the sun rise again this morning I can't help but wonder if you noticed as well that we will see the colors within the sky swell. The last time I saw it I was reminded of The Lion King it's so interesting the way the little things can get to me I wanted to watch it rise for a longer amount of time than I really had in fact; it makes me kind of sad that I didn't. And now my sleeping schedule is all out of wack wow, Rebecca. Why'd you do that? I just couldn't help it, don't you want to see the ocean of colors in the sky as well? I can't stop myself from picturing diving into the sky, I never learnt how to swim but I trust I'd only cause splashing to emerge from the happiness that these colors fill me with- I'd like to believe they'd hold me. **I won't drown.

I used to long for your arms around me
now all I long for is paper to place poetry
that I've written about you and nothings
that I wish would become somethings.
But that's somehow too much to ask for
I suppose it's more than I can really afford,
a longing for you.

Because of you,*
my favorite shades of blue are now ugly.
Everything that you ever told me is now
some form of anxiety I don't want to hear
sometimes I wish you'd just disappear..

Misunderstandings
can be such a threat.
Broken hearted girl
why'd you think like that?
Now your tears will overflow
"Life can be such overdose.."
You should shove it
all behind you, I suppose.
Stop wishing to fall into a
comatose.
Just hit your head already.
No one will miss you
you're too unsteady.