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You’ve left me there,
In the dark-
With all of the demons of my past.
They’ve held me captive in those shadows,
And they continued to-
While you waltzed into the light.

                           Alysia Marie 2018 ©
 Sep 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Melo
After
 Sep 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Melo
My vision is fading
My mind has been slipping
I fear it is over
My time with the living

You can't expect me to take it
I held you on my back and you broke it
My finger on the trigger I might pull it
My brains on the wall would be a sight wouldn't it

At least the pain would stop
I'd be free from the feeling
I just wanted to make it to the top
You loved to be my ceiling

No turning back now
Music blaring too loud
Speed hitting 200
Soon I'll be in the clouds

Would you care then?
Tell everyone you were my friend?
Say you wish you were there in the end?
I wish you were there in the end.
 Sep 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Annie
I shut the door and let the demons play,
They said, "This time we have planned to stay."

So I sat in the corner of a sickening black room,
And I let the voices in my head to bloom,

Heaven, for the demons,the night had become,
As I watched them with knives,offering me some,

I prayed to God to get me out of there,
"Thee soul is ours.", is what they cleared,

Eventually, I saw a light at the end of pain,
It was mercy waiting for me down the lane,

Some called me a 'hero',others said 'wicked',
But who was to judge,when I had won the ticket,

For I know that for every tear,there is a sorrow to fade,
For every dark night,there is a promising bright day
Wicked wicked little heart
why you show up in the dark

Leave me alone
go away now
don’t bite my bone
cause you know just how

Wicked wicked little thought
you show up in my mind and look what you brought

Leave me alone
go away now
don’t bite my bone
cause you know just how

Wicked wicked little feeling
you just keep down my ceiling

Why you make me feel this way
you eat up my smile and leave me grey
so leave me alone
go away now
don’t bite my bone
bye bye ciao

Leave me alone
go away now
please
 Sep 2018 PEARL SMOKE
nina
evil
 Sep 2018 PEARL SMOKE
nina
dilated pupils
so far the eye turns black
darkness triumphs
& the demons are out to play
twisted, wicked smile
she's laughing
crooked, backward
crawling, digging
making home
inside the crevices of my brain
i'm laughing
skeleton fingers
curled around my rib cages
picking apart my insides
a heart?
oh, you don't need this my dear...
the bones in my spine
crick, crack, break
i cannot bend back any further
she's smiling
always so happy to take over
a prisoner to my own body
living inside my head
as i watch through
the barred windows they call my eyes
i am hypnotized by her
she's evil
yet somehow so beautiful
as she rips hearts away
& swallows souls whole
playing with the leftover blood
leaving behind nothing but ash,
a kiss,
& a smirk
all i do is watch
all i do is smile
as she destroys me
all i do is wait
until she's done
& i awake from the evil
haunting my mind
but over the years
my brain has decayed
& i isolate myself
so she's become bored.
with nothing left to play with,
she's starting to pack her things
to find a home with better toys
but i'll always be fascinated
by her evil ways
 Aug 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Kheeghan
Gray
 Aug 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Kheeghan
Everything is gray
 Nothing has color anymore
Nothing makes me happy
 I can't be happy anymore
So many thing used to make me happy
 Now those things have no meaning
I'm sick of this colorless cloud I live on
 But there is no way off
If I take a step off the cloud I will fall to my inevitable death
 I will eventually die sooner then later
Right now I think it will be sooner
 I'm tired
Mentally I'm exhausted
 I want it to end....
 Aug 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Eyla
feel
 Aug 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Eyla
when i started feel a little happy,
the demons inside me started
make me mess things up.

and here i am again,
feeling more unhappy.
 Aug 2018 PEARL SMOKE
Imran Islam
When you are unhappy
I'll be your happiness
When you are sleepy
I'll be your dream
Because I love you.

When you are upset
I will help you
When you are unfit
I'll be fit for you
Because I love you.

When you're so tired
I will be your rest
When you are so sad
I'll be your gladness
Because of love you.

When you cry
I'll be your smile
When you are afraid
I'll be brave for you
Because I love you.

When you are sick
I will be your cure
When you're weak
I'll be your strength
Because I love you.

I am a poet
You'll be my poem
When I like them
You'll love me; I bet
Because I love you.
Some people think it's easy.
That if you just tell me to smile I will and that I will genuinely mean it, too.
And I try to mean it- believe me, I try.
I try to find a hint of happiness inside of me and force it out.
I tried.
I tried to do the things that normal and happy people do
Because maybe if I tried I could convince myself that I, too, was a happy and normal person.
So I tried.
I took myself out to dinner.
I tried yoga.
I went to parties, and even though I can't dance, I danced anyways and made a beautiful fool of myself.
I finally bought myself a lava lamp because I've always thought they were cool.
I organized the clothes in my closet by color.
I spent twenty minutes picking out the ripest tomatoes in the grocery store.
I took up crocheting,
I learned a little French,
And I forgot all about this mess of a life I'm in by making a mess in my kitchen.
I sang in the shower so loud and proud that I lost my voice.
I went cheese tasting,
And I drank A LOT of wine.
I made faces at every person I drove by on the highway.
I started going on walks.
I started going on runs.
I ran to the balcony
And stepped on the ledge
And threw my arms out beside me
And screamed YES!
I'm free! And I'm so happy about it!
I'm happy.
I promise you I'm happy.
These tears, they are just because I'm so happy and my sadness is crying because it's gone.
I'm not sad anymore.
I'm normal. I'm happy.
I'm just like everyone else when they go to art galleries.
I'm actually looking at the art really hard and trying to find the meaning behind a red squiggle rather than just really trying to avoid people from seeing the pain.
I'm actually just a normal person that's perfectly content when they go wash their hands instead of a person that dreads walking up to a faucet and catching a glimpse of their reflection.
I'm actually a normal person that stepped onto a ledge to feel nothing but freedom rather than feeling a desire to take another step.
I'm actually ok and I'm so happy.
It's what I whispered to myself at night
Because I thought that maybe if I told myself it enough times I would eventually wake up one morning and find it to be true.
That I'm ok. I'm happy.
That's what I want to convince you because maybe if you're convinced...
I'll be convinced too.
 Aug 2018 PEARL SMOKE
aar505n
There's this inner rawness
That comes at night
Lawless in its flight
Not afraid to fight
Because it's honest
The innocence of it
But so naïve and so me
I'm the sum of all I've done
Minus all I've thought
Plus all I've fought
What I regret equals what I'm proud off
So I forget the past, move pass it
To prove my point and not disappoint
Grasp the tomorrow, forgoing the sorrows
And accepting my soul for what it is
My very flawed essence
God, I'm not God or even a sun
But a son on the run
Lost into the sprawl
Finding myself - alone
In the forest falls
On a star lit night, feeling unlit
Scratching at the surface for purpose
And despite my fright I still ask
Suppose we're alone
And the skies really are empty
Would it matter?
Either way I'm still here, alone
Looking up at the closest star
So far away
So I look down instead
I listen to my soul
Like quiet waves
Gently lapping at the shore
Within my very core
The tide resides but only to surge forward
I fall down only to get up
Regardless of everything
Because it's only me
Just me.
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