Curse my age,

My twisted bones,

My failing sight,

And broken home,

Curse my luck,

In all I do,

When I got old,

I have no clue.

My mind lies tattered on the floor,

Feeling lost, catching a chill,

A broken soul, a blackened heart,

For I'm mentally ill.

I'm too tired to compute,

I'm way too tired to think,

I'm just too tired to enjoy life,

I'm not two, but one on the brink

I shall never seek perfection,

It's not something I'll attain,

For even though, As we all know,

Imperfection is a strain.

Destiny dictated,

Fortunes 'ready told,

In the hands of others,

Souls so often sold.

Leech drawn,

Blood drunk,

My life,

Old junk.

The flowers lose their fresh picked looks,

Like I am losing mine,

As time ticks on, the smile's gone,

Where once I was just fine

Little woolly monsters,

Dark as vampire bats,

Frightening the children,

Who else, but knitted cats

I see,

I saw,

I've seen

Before.

I am,

I can,

I'm just,

A man.

I fear,

A foe,

I'll never

My phone is always charging,

Plugged into the wall,

I wouldn't call it mobile,

In no way, not all at.

I simply will not listen,

To anything you say,

I'll sit and drink,

Try not to think,

Of what I did today.

Who on earth is up this hour,

It's barely even dawn,

And what's worse, I start to curse,

They're out mowing the lawn.

Too much noise,

Deafening

Sound,

Fills my head,

Whilst

Wandering round,

At times I fear,

My head

May pop,

Please make the noise,

Lessen

Then stop

I'm off to my new local,

I'll likely have a drink,

Perhaps I'll grab some food too,

Or perhaps just sit and think,

I love having a local,

A place where I belong,

Where I'm happy just to be me,

At the local, nothing's wrong.

My puppy is imprisoned,

To be kept in solitude,

Her crime involved a postman,

And her incredibly bad mood.

I look the same,

As you,

I look the same,

As yesterday,

I look the same,

As you envisioned,

I look the same,

As ever,

I look the same,

You stopped looking,

I look the same,

Wrong, look again.

Love I'm told is in the air,

Yet such a thing I cannot see,

Perhaps I'm looking up not down,

Or simply waywardly.

Tuesday mourning morning,

It's cold and wet again,

How can it be that clouds can cry,

For more and more March rain

Given opportunities,

I tend to miss my chance,

We'll never know what could have been,

Had I asked you to dance.

I have a busy schedule,

Yet what I never see,

Is a time for mere reflection,

A time to be just me.

My mind just wont be quiet,

My brain is never still,

It's just one of the many things,

Of being mentally ill.

As the hour draws steadily near,
The cold chilled spine from unknown fear,
As Sunday goes, Monday appear,
The weekend's dead, we shed a tear.

A moment lapsed,

The gaze was lost,

Our lives diverged,

Eternal cost

A momentary lapse of thought,

Missed opportunity,

I miss a still and peaceful mind,

The chance to simply be happy.

Didn't see it coming,

Struck down to the floor,

But in life you keep on going,

And coming back for more.

I sit and look,

Indifferently engaging,

People pass by,

Mindless cadavers,

Seeking more,

Having less,

Racing to mortality.

My name is tolerance,

Your name is fear,

Stoking up hatred,

Of things I hold dear



My name's acceptance,

Your's bigotry,

Insulting of everything,

That's true to me



My name is hopefully,

Your's there's no way,

Yet I still hold hope that

You find truth one day

I see the narcissist standing in the corner,

Rent a friend (or ten), on hand to smile, laugh,

How can so much love be reflected inwards?

In a moment of madness,

I ask him how he is,

And he begins to tell me,

A "Show and Tell" person,

Show me everything they have,

Tell me how much it cost,

Confidence,

No, that's so last week,

He is the one and only......

By next week,

He'll be the one,

And only

One.

Who cares

A time for much reflection,
To look back with pronounced fear,
On all the things that we regret,
Oh great, it's a New Year.

Strange how good news sometimes

can still cut you at the knee,

When even things you want to hear

cause some difficulty

Day follows night,

Follows fear,

Follows fright,

Follows you,

Follows right,

Fear the day,

Dread the night.

Day follows night,

Follows fear,

Follows fright,

Follows you,

Follows right,

Fear the day,

Dread the night.

Twisted, tired

Body sore,

Approaching end,

Can take no more.

Welcome to the weekend,

So long since you were here,

Let's all have a party,

And be full of no work cheer

Olly was an octopus,

He had 8 legs and arms,

He gave good hugs,

And shoulder shrugs,

But juggling was his charm.

To kiss the early morning sun,

The promise of a day so fun,

One that has only begun,

To share with you, the day, as one

The other side of forever,

We could have shared the view,

Now I am sat here just dying,

Instead of there with you.

My daily dose of wellness pills,

Is in a weekly container,

The sadness of filling it up,

Makes me want to take the remainder

Off out to the garden,

Let's hope it doesn't rain,

Whilst I know that I am waterproof,

Getting wet is such a pain.

Broken skin,

Exposed vein,

One last time,

To ease the pain

I'd like too be a polar bear,

And wander round the Pole,

Hunting seals and eating meals,

It doesn't seem a toll.

I promised myself I wouldn't worry

but I did,

And still do,

That I wouldn't quit

right before giving up

putting down

siting still,

To try harder

not cheat

or lie,



My promises are just words

empty gestures to self improvement,

I promise to do better

I promise to be on time

next time

honestly.

Every night I make a promise

That tomorrow things will change,

My life it will be better,

The troubles not so strange,

Each promise is of hollow words,

Like Easter Eggs, just shells,

For though I promise better,

Each tomorrow is just Hell.

I took my puppy to the pub,

I'd say we have great fun,

But when it came to buying drinks,

She failed to buy me one.

April's fool we recognise,

The darkness, cold, behind the eyes,

So it should come as no surprise,

The fool is you, you realise